We Hunted The Mammoth
Today we’re taking another peek into the Semen Retention subreddit, the hangout of some of the most intense NoFappers you can find online. In particular, we’re going to look at a post from someone called RealisticGarage, who has a warning for his semen-retaining brothers: your life force can’t just be drained from your johnson. It can also get drained through your eyes. So, you know, look out for that.
Men who retain their semen think that the practice gives them almost magical powers — increased energy, concentration, and charisma, to name just a few of the things these guys think they get from simply not jerking off for a month or two. The Semen Retention subreddit is filled with testimonies from guys claiming that their non-masturbation hobby has made them superior men.
As this garbage year comes to a close, I thought I’d dig out some of my favorite posts from the past year. I think they’re all worth revisiting. Enjoy!
So the guys over in the Semen Retention subreddit — a more hardcore spinoff of the larger NoFap subreddit — are discussing the mysteries of female nature, as weirdo misogynists are wont to do. Specifically, the guys are trying to explain to one another why men often seem socially awkward, while women seem like naturals who can easily get along with anyone.
By David Futrelle
As something of a connoisseur of misogyny, I’m drawn to the Semen Retention subreddit by its unique mixture of woman-hating and penis-centric woo. While the woo is blatant and ridiculous — the men there think that retaining their sacred seed will give them magical powers and make them irresistible to women and other living things — the misogyny is generally a little subtler.
But not always.
By David Futrelle
We’ve watched as the more misogynistic offshoot of the Men’s Rights movements known as MGTOW has gotten more Nazified over the last several years — more friendly to alt-right memes, more open to Nazi ideology. Given that the Men Going Their Own Way is rooted in the hatred of women, it’s not surprising to see so many MGTOWs open to other forms of hate; hate often comes in clusters.
By David Futrelle
Yep, some NoFap dude did a NoFap version of Johnny Cash’s famous cover of Nine Inch Nails’ “Hurt,” with the lyrics changed to make a point about the evils of “cooming” while jerking off to porn. Just listen to this mess, if you can:
By David Futrelle
Just like Men Going Their Own Way, who can’t stop talking about the women they’re ostensibly “going their own way” from, militant NoFappers can’t stop obsessing over the sexual appeal (or alleged lack thereof) of the women they’re definitely not masturbating over.
By David Futrelle
So I took a little stroll through the Semen Retention subreddit again today, and there were demons afoot. Or at least inside the brain of one of the gentlemen there.
