We Hunted The Mammoth
Earlier this week, the Mars corporation set off another culture war skirmish by launching a new, all-female package of M&Ms as a way of showing some sort of candy-related solidarity with the women of the world. “We’re celebrating women who are flipping the status quo, transforming the world around them to make it a more colorful and welcoming place for all,” the company declared.
Watch out, straight dudes! You may find yourself pining for a girlfriend, but find that there aren’t any on offer, because the lesbians have taken them all.
So over on the AntiFeminists subreddit they’re discussing the important issues of the day. Like whether or not feminism is a giant grooming operation operated by “predatory lesbians” who want all the ladies to themselves.
So Disney/Pixar’s new Toy Story movie, Lightyear, came up a bit short at the box office last weekend, taking in 50 million dollars, some 20 million dollars less than Disney was expecting. And homophobic culture warriors are over the moon, insisting that the poor performance of Lightyear was the result of the film’s alleged “wokeness,” with parents righteously outraged over a blink-and-you-might-miss-it kiss between two female characters.
We’re going back in!
There were way too many amazing screenshots of self-confident mansplainers of women’s bodies and sexuality to fit in my post on r/NotHowGirlsWork the other day. So I’m doing another one. Like right here, and right now. It’s the very post you are reading at this moment!
Men Going Their Own Way have traditionally had a lot of trouble understanding lesbians — or even believing that they exist. But one forward-thinking MGTOW gentleman thinks he’s got lesbians all figured out — and feminism too.
Red Pillers see themselves as serious, scientific students of the human condition, helping one another make sense of the sometimes hard truths of human nature. In the Ask The Red Pill subreddit, they deal forthrightly with important questions about life and how to live it. Like: What do I do if my girlfriend insists on walking in front of me? Is playing piano a beta cuck activity? And perhaps the most perplexing question of all: Are lesbians real?
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By David Futrelle
Attention asexual ladies and lesbians! It looks like the incels have figured out your dirty little sex secret, which is that you don’t exist. No matter how you define your sexuality you are actually Chadsexual — able, willing, and eager to have sex with any Chad that comes your way, even if you pretend to like only women or to not like sex at all.
By David Futrelle
Lesbians around the world face a deep existential crisis today as it has been revealed that they do not, in fact, exist. At least according to some dudes on the internet. Specifically, some dudes on the Men Going Their Own Way subreddit, long a hotbed of Lesbian Denial.
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By David Futrelle
Right-wingers are positively obsessed with lesbian kisses these days. Yesterday I wrote about One Angry Gamer’s meltdown over a fleeting, blink-and-you’ll-miss-it same-sex kiss in the latest Star Wars movie. Meanwhile, over on The Federalist, Lutheran pastor and YouTube personality Hans Fiene is losing it over a cutesy TV commercial running on the Hallmark Channel featuring two lesbians getting hitched. Naturally, it ends with a kiss. A LESBIAN KISS.