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This NoFap parody of Johnny Cash’s cover of Hurt is possibly the worst song ever recorded

You make Johnny Cash sad

By David Futrelle

Yep, some NoFap dude did a NoFap version of Johnny Cash’s famous cover of Nine Inch Nails’ “Hurt,” with the lyrics changed to make a point about the evils of “cooming” while jerking off to porn. Just listen to this mess, if you can:

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Ruin your weekend with this grotesque “field report” from a MGTOW who had sex

Our thoughts exactly

By David Futrelle

So-called “Men Going Their Own Way” are so bad at the whole “going their own way” part of their little woman-hating credo that they sometimes have sex with women.

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Hot Local Stock Photo Models Want to Talk to You Now About White Genocide

By David Futrelle

It’s hard to think of a more embarrassing memetic self-own than the ubiquity of the “hot white girl complaining about white genocide” memes on the alt-right internet.

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The stank air of your tight pocket: The most romantic DM ever?

Message of love

By David Futrelle

We live in a dark, cynical world, and so it’s nice sometimes to be reminded that there are still decent, considerate people around.

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“When you see a picture of Melania remember that President Trump gets whatever part of that juicy sirloin he wants,” gross commenter insists

Ladies! Check out this tasty hunk of man meat

By David Futrelle

Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse, some dude drops this bit of erotic fan fiction into the comments here: