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men who should not ever be with women ever MGTOW misogyny spermjacking

MGTOW urges men to pelt their used condoms with gamma rays to keep sneaky ladies from stealing their sperm

This dude knows something about gamma rays

By David Futrelle

If you’ve been reading this blog for long, you probably know how terrified many manospherians are of getting spermjacked — that is, having some woman they’ve just had sex with fishing their used condoms out of the trash and using the sperm to impregnate herself so she can live the high life off of the sweet child support cash.

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#gamergate alpha males antifeminism drama kings men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny MRA oppressed men precious bodily fluids PUA red pill reddit spermjacking

Misogynists can't agree: Should you guard your sperm with your life — or spread your "super serum" as widely as you can?

SuperSperm: Probably not going to get near any vaginas any time soon
SuperSperm, not to be confused with Sperm Clark Kent

It’s not exactly news that Men’s Rights Activists are obsessed — seriously obsessed — with sperm.

Several days ago, one Redditor took to the Men’s Rights subreddit to warn fellow sperm-generators to keep a close watch on that sperm of theirs, telling the tale of how he allegedly caught his alleged wife allegedly “scooping … up” the sperm he had thoughtfully deposited on her belly during sex and “PUTTING IT IN HER VAGINA!!!” He is now allegedly seeking a divorce.

But this is hardly the first time Men’s Rights Redditors have worked themselves into a lather over the dangers of spermjacking. Or even the hundredth. If you do a search for the word “sperm” on Reddit’s Men’s Rights subreddit, you’ll find literally hundreds of posts — many with hundreds of upvotes and/or comments — on the importance of safeguarding one’s own sperm.

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evil sexy ladies homophobia men who should not ever be with women ever MGTOW misogyny MRA precious bodily fluids reddit spermjacking

The Semen Thief: One Semen-Obsessed Redditor's Search for Answers

They do real so hard.
They do real SO HARD.

The Redditor who goes by the name vlodia has what can only be described as a unique set of interests: Stocks. Diablo. Leaked celebrity nudes. Anonymous browsing. And semen.

And while vlodia seems to keep most of his semen-related inquires confined to porn subreddits like r/tipofmypenis, he recently wandered into the Men’s Rights subreddit to ask about a semen-related quandary more serious than where to find “Videos Featuring A Guy Cumming Really Fast After Blowjob or Handjob?”

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a new woman to hate evil fat fatties evil sexy ladies evil single moms hundreds of upvotes imaginary oppression irony alert lazy women eating bon bons mantrum men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny MRA oppressed men reddit spermjacking

Men’s Rights Redditors confused, angered by random woman’s obvious joke about spermjacking some dude

Dorothy Parker would like to remind you that women are also capable of making jokes.
Frustrated Dorothy Parker would like to remind you that women are also capable of making jokes.

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Thanks! (And thanks again to all who’ve already donated.) Now back to our regularly scheduled programming:

Yet more proof that Men’s Rights activists live in an imaginary misandrist dystopia of their own making: this post on Reddit, which has the Men’s Righsters there in a tizzy:

567  Heard this gem yesterday at a college. Stay safe, men! (self.MensRights)  submitted 1 day ago by LoudMatt  Thought MensRights would find this interesting.  I teach a class at a small community college and yesterday I was set up at a student activities fair. At the table next to me, one of the staff (not a student, mind you), a chubby, cute woman in her early to mid 20s was talking to two students in their late teens and said (this is verbatim, btw):  "If I don't have a baby by 28, I'm just going to go to some bar and get pregnant from some guy. It's easier and cheaper and I'll get a check too!"  A classy role model right there. Stay safe, boys.      145 comments

Yeah, fellas, assuming that this even happened, I’m pretty sure what we’re dealing with is what the rest of us human beings call a “joke.” A dumb joke, but a joke nonetheless. This young lady, I feel confident in saying, does not actually intend to spermjack some innocent lad so she can spend the next 18-plus years of her life raising a child herself while trying to squeeze child support out of someone who hates her.

But don’t tell that to the Men’s Rightsers, who assume the worst about this young woman — and then some.

springy 40 points 1 day ago (45|5)  And then when she is a month pregnant, and reality sets in, she will find some sucker that looks like he has good financial prospects, sleep with him and say "You are going to be a father - let's get married". He will do the honorable thing, and then two years later she will kick him out, and she will keep the child, his house, his car, and his savings. He lose everything, including his dignity. He will only get to keep two things: regrets, and child support bills.

Indeed, some of the regulars there are so angry about it they literally want to get the young woman fired or at the very least admonished for making such a terrible, terrible comment in front of young, impressionable students who, I guess, have never heard a joke before.

Another commenter wonders how it is possible for a chubby woman to also be cute. Because fat women are hambeasts AMIRITE FELLAS HIGH FIVE!!!1!

If you scroll down far enough in the comments you will find some Men’s Rights Redditors wondering if maybe, perhaps, possibly, the woman might be making a joke. But these aren’t the comments getting the upvotes. In the Men’s Rights subreddit, anti-woman hysteria trumps rational skepticism pretty much all day, every day.

Q: How many Men’s Rights Activists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: MISANDRY! SPERMJACKING! MALE DISPOSABILITY! THAT’S NOT FUNNY!

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a woman is always to blame all about the menz are these guys 12 years old? crackpottery creepy disgusting women domestic violence entitled babies evil sexy ladies evil women friend zone friend zoning girl germs grandiosity incoherent rage men who should not ever be with women ever MGTOW misandry misogyny MRA oppressed men rape jokes reactionary bullshit reddit spermjacking straw feminists twitter whaaaaa? whores why can't men punch women?

#INeedMasculismBecause nothing is funnier than MRAs sincerely trying to explain their dumb beliefs to the world

MRA Tweet Generating Room
MRA Tweet Generating Room

So: many if not most of you have probably heard about the whole #INeedMasculismBecause thing. For those who aren’t: a bunch of Men’s Rights Redditors and other MRAs, inspired by a post on 4Chan, decided to swarm Twitter with #INeedMasculismBecause tweets in response to the #INeedFeminismBecause hashtag. Feminists responded by outswarming the MRAs, flooding their new hashtag with often quite hilarious parodies of MRAspeak, as well as some just plain ridiculousness.

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a voice for men advocacy of violence all about the menz antifeminism dozens of upvotes excusing abuse FemRAs GirlWritesWhat grandiosity hundreds of upvotes misogyny MRA narcissism oppressed men playing the victim reddit spermjacking

Reddit Sh*tlords Give Other Reddit Sh*tlords Prestigious Sh*tlord Award

Art borrowed from Casey Nelson of SeeBeautifulIndiana.com. (Click pic to go there.)
Art borrowed from Casey Nelson of SeeBeautifulIndiana.com. (Click pic to go there.)

Today is an auspicious day. For the Men’s Rights Subreddit, which we often write about here on Man Boobz, has won the prestigious World’s Greatest Shitlord Award. Oh, sorry, I mean it won the Subreddit of the Day award on Reddit. Which is, in this case, pretty much the same thing.

Here are some highlights from the official announcement , which I am totally not making up. No, really, you can go look. Someone – that being XavierMendel, one of the mods of r/subredditoftheday — actually wrote these things. And meant them. I AM NOT BEING SARCASTIC THIS IS REAL HOLY SHIT.

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$MONEY$ cock blockade dozens of upvotes evil women evo psych fairy tales I'm totally being sarcastic men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny MRA oppressed men paranoia playing the victim precious bodily fluids reddit spermjacking

Men’s Rights Redditor warns men: “Be careful with your sperm. Your very freedom is at stake.”

Men: Protect your Purity of Essence
Men: Protect your Purity of Essence

It’s official: Men’s Rights Activists are more obsessed with their “precious bodily fluids” than Dr. Strangelove’s General Jack D. Ripper. Over on the Men’s Rights subreddit, many of the regulars are celebrating Boxing Day by sitting around on their computers worrying about evil predatory succubi burgling their sperm. Check out this little post, which has gotten 90 upvotes so far:

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a voice for men antifeminism bears evil women MRA oppressed men paranoia parody playing the victim spermjacking

Canada: Land of Danger for Men and Boys?

feministbear
Canadian feminist trying to eat a man’s butt

I’ve seen some strange and paranoid comments on Men’s Rights hate site A Voice for Men, but this recent comment may be the strangest and paranoidest I’ve ever seen. In the comments to a post outing one of the protesters at the Warren Farrell talk at the University of Toronto, a commenter called Redfield is worried that Canada has now become some sort of death trap for men. Because of all the feminism.

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domestic violence drama evil women hypocrisy idiocy misogyny MRA oppressed men paranoia precious bodily fluids reddit shit that never happened spermjacking TROOOLLLL!!

Guess who got trolled on April Fool’s Day? Hint: It rhymes with “Glen’s Brights Pubreddit”

So it turns out that the heartbreaking yet highly implausible story of attempted spermburgling that got the Men’s Rights subreddit so riled up on the first of the month … was in fact fake.

Mr. ineedhelpnow1234 himself wrote me a note today alerting me to a post on his blog explaining the whole thing, and why he did it. Some highlights:

I wanted to reveal just how twisted these men can be in the pursuit of their agenda so I came up with a story they could not resist. …

The spermjacker trope is irresistible to “men’s rights” activists because they believe they are perfect Darwinian examples of masculinity and as a result are irresistible to the hormonally irrational schemers that make up womankind. Narcissism and misogyny collide to make a toxic brew.

Oh, and I added the twist that this man punched his girlfriend so hard in the stomach that she bruised. Surely such fierce proponents of “gender equality” would not support violence against women. Right?

Well, we all know how that turned out. Ineedhelpnow1234/the blogger Eschatology continued:

The “men’s rights” movement is morally bankrupt. It is made up of people who support hitting women. It is made up of people who refuse to say it is wrong to hit women. It is made up of people who are so paranoid of women that they think people actually talk like this:

You fucking bastard, how dare you punch me for what I’m entitled to! Call me the minute you get this god damn message or I’ll call the fucking police and end your future. CALL MEEEE.

Attention MRA’s: You have all exposed yourselves as rotten human beings and you have discredited your movement (again). …

I wrote this story by stitching together nearly every cliche I have ever come across in the “men’s rights” movement. I tried to see if the MRAs had any line they would not cross. Apparently they do not. Looks like the SPLC made a good call.

Heck, even after they got called out for supporting the (imaginary) puncher,  both here and on Jezebel, and were roundly mocked for believing such an utterly ridiculous tall tale, this is about as close as any Men’s Rights redditor got to criticizing the punch that never was:

He panicked and hit her. Sure he should have just have restrained her and took the condom out of her hands but we’re human and its not like he continually beat her into a pulp.

Yep, no big deal, “its not like he continually beat her into a pulp.”

The comment containing that line got 11 upvotes, and zero downvotes.

The Men’s Rights Movement, beyond the pale — but also beyond parody.

EDITED TO ADD: The Men’s Rights regulars respond to the big reveal here. They are apparently determined to learn absolutely nothing from the whole episode. At the moment this is the most highly upvoted comment:

 

EDITED TO ADD AGAIN: Ineedhelpnow1234/Eschatology posted about this in the TwoXChromosomes subreddit, Naturally, a small horde of r/mensrightsers invaded the thread and pooped all over it.

 

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$MONEY$ antifeminism domestic violence grandiosity MRA oppressed men reddit self-promotion sex shit that never happened spermjacking

Men’s Rights Redditors Indignant That World Notices They Are Assholes

Run, condom, run! Don't let her catch you!

Oh, boy. So that almost certainly imaginary  “dude punching his spermjacking girlfriend” story in the Men’s Rights subreddit the other day? The one that inspired all those Men’s Rights Redditors to totally defend the (alleged) puncher?

Well, now Jezebel has weighed in on the subject as well. Erin Gloria Ryan raises a few questions about ineedhelpnow1234’s implausible tale, and about the dudes who not only believed it but got all enraged at the imaginary punched girlfriend:

Where does this legend of the sperm swiping madwoman come from? And why won’t it die? Why are men’s rights activists so willing to believe that in a world practically dripping with sperm, women specifically want theirs so they can be pregnant and possibly farty for 9 months, stretch their skin out, and go through childbirth in order to control the men in their lives?

Apparently, at least one Men’s Rights Redditor is a reader of Jezebel, because he went and posted a link, explaining that

I normally try to stay neutral as best I can in matters relating to the men’s rights/feminism debate, but this has me grinding my teeth.

So this is what feminists think about one of our most pressing issues.

Presumably he is referring to the extremely pressing issue of girlfriends who flee the bedroom after sex, clutching used condoms and shouting that “I’m finally going to get the baby I deserve,” and how they totally deserve to be punched in the stomach so hard it leaves a bruise.

The discussion inspired this exchange:

Oh, and this one, too:

YadaYadaYada2 certainly has a flair for the dramatic, doesn’t he?

Men’s Rights Activists, so emotional!

EDITED TO ADD: I sort of started arguing with the regulars in the comments there, and Glarfugus set me straight on the nature of my sins against the Men’s Rights subreddit:

You quoted accurately, the problem lies where you quote perfectly sound posts and talk about them like they’re ridiculous. You address punching a woman in the stomach as though it’s something of high crime. I’m not saying it’s something that’s right, but punching someone in the stomach in a panicked situation where you have a risk of being fucked by the court system for the next 18 years? Reasonable action.

I put my favorite part in bold. The stuff about punching women is pretty special too.