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#tradwife homophobia lesbians marital rape misogyny transphobia women shouldn't work women's suffrage

One woman’s crusade against bikinis, witchcraft, cell phones, and her own right to vote

Check out my new blog, My AI Obsession, and my latest post there Is it Replika’s fault that some dude tried to kill Queen Elizabeth with a crossbow?

Lori Alexander–aka The Transformed Wife–is a tradwife influencer with strong opinions on many of the crucial issues of the day. Like, for example, bikinis, witchcraft, lesbianism, cell phones, marital rape, college, and how women should be denied the right to vote. I’ve written about her a couple of times before, but I recently took a look at her Twitter, and found myself scrolling down her timeline, going back a few months. And I was a little surprised by some of her opinions on the issues that matter the most to her. And also a little surprised at what she thinks are the important issues.

Let’s start with the most obviously important of all these issues–by which I mean the swimware of Satan, the too-teeny bikini.

Bikinis are at least as bad as seed oils!

And speaking of rock music, it’s dangerous, and has been known to cause women to sway their hips in public. Even when it’s supposedly Christian rock!

The Transformed wife has some especially strong feelings about marital rape, which apparently doesn’t exist, as getting married to a dude means he gets to have sex whenever he wants even if you say “no” or fall asleep.

This is one of the reasons no one should even date before getting married.

And while wives are supposed to “submit” to their husbands whenever hubby wants sex, it has to be the right kind of sex. In other words, no butt stuff.

Speaking of sex, The Transformed WIfe doesn’t think parents should send their daughters to college, what with all the witchcraft and lesbianism going on there.

Also, going to college wastes some primo baby-having years.

College is bad enough. God forbid today’s woman ever leave the home to earn a living.

Women really shouldn’t be wantonly driving cars around either.

Cell phones are nearly as bad as cars.

Solar energy is also a devilish plot to give people with brain tumors headaches.

But if Costco is Godly, Target is Satanic. You can just tell!

Despite having a lot of opinions about all these worldly issues, the Transformed Wife doesn’t think women should be allowed to express their opinions at the polls. Indeed, she thinks women’s suffrage has been a disaster for everyone, mainly because other women tend to vote for Democrats and perversion more generally.

Ironically, unlike many right-wing Christians, and despite her strong hatred of bikinis, TW thinks it was good for Sports Illustrated to put trans singer Kim Petras and ex-con Martha Stewart on the cover of its swimsuit edition–because what man could lust after either of them?

Huh. Forget Martha Stewart, whom the Transformed Wife only disses because she’s an 81 year old posing in a swimsuit (though not a bikini). I just think TW is perhaps underestimating the lust-inducing power of Ms. Petras. So here’s a video for her latest song, which features simulated fellatio on an … oboe? And a video playlist of the songs on her Slut Pop EP, all of which are utterly filthy.

I’m mainly doing this because I want TW to read this post and watch these videos and, hopefully, to get the chorus of Superpower Bitch stuck in her head.

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Raging Bee
Raging Bee
1 year ago

Lori Alexander is also known to routinely remove from her blog all comments mentioning or linking to any sort of help or services for people dealing with domestic abuse. So yeah, she’s quite decidedly anti-woman, anti-freedom, and pro-abuse. Brainwashed enabler indeed.

Fraser
1 year ago

I know of her from an infamous post of a few years ago about how men want “Debt-free virgins without tattoos” — “debt” being another excuse for why they shouldn’t go to college and learn things their parents and future husband don’t want them to know. Nothing posted here surprises me though it does make me loathe her further.

GSS ex-noob
GSS ex-noob
1 year ago

@Raging Bee: In which case she’s not even supporting the menz! I’ve known men who were actually, legitimately abused by their wives (of whom she would totes disapprove), and it’s hard for them to ask for help. But they need it and it’s out there. A group really helped a friend of mine, and his second wife wasn’t a doormat but a nice person and they adored each other. Practically love at first sight.

Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
1 year ago

Hey, plenty of women want debt-free virgins without tattoos! And for loads of us, the “virgin” part is optional. Ditto the tattoos. What about the womenz!

Tipsy
Tipsy
1 year ago

Lori /TW is a HUGE hypocrite! She did/does everything she preaches is “sinful” for women to do. Her dad was a feminist & raised her to be one too. Some things I can think of off the top of my head: she went to college, was a working mom, says wives disrespect husbands when they spend HIS money, should be on food stamps, grow their own food, etc, meanwhile they’re loaded, have a million dollar home AND a summer lake house, she had a maid & nanny (husband said it’s different for them bc they actually needed help when she was injured in a car accident & sick with cancer), she was still young when she had her last kid, which may be bc cancer left her unable to get pregnant, but an ex friend claimed it’s bc she took BC after Dr warned another pregnancy could be dangerous to her health, she got medical treatment, but tells others not to. Rules for thee, not for me. She wrote she decided to “transform” & be submissive to her husband bc they had marital problems & it was the fix for a happy marriage, but it seemed obvious to me she was really saying he had an affair(s), it was blamed on her independent lady ways, so she started catering to his ego & insecurity 24/7. I don’t feel sorry for her one iota tho. She’s a truly horrible person who repeatedly tells young scared women, seeking her guidance, to stay with physically abusive husbands bc denying a husband is the same as denying God. It’s important ppl know she’s not just some silly lady spouting religious BS online…she’s truly dangerous!

BTW her ex friend spilled tons of dirt about them on FB years ago & her husband threw a huge, extremely immature & very un-christian like fit about it in the replies for days. It was glorious!

Jenora Feuer
Jenora Feuer
1 year ago

@Tipsy:
Honestly, ‘rules for thee but not for me’ is such a big thing for these people that there’s a named law for it, Wilhoit’s Law:

Conservatism consists of exactly one proposition, to wit: There must be in-groups whom the law protects but does not bind, alongside out-groups whom the law binds but does not protect.

We could argue over whether or not it’s really hypocrisy if it’s actually a fundamental part of the belief that ‘those people’ need rules to keep them in line but I’m a good person naturally so I don’t need those rules.

The Phantom Cheese, Wearer of Problem Glasses
The Phantom Cheese, Wearer of Problem Glasses
1 year ago

TIL that solar panels are radioactive

GSS ex-noob
GSS ex-noob
1 year ago

@Tipsy: Do you have a direct link to this lake of spilled tea?

@Phantom Cheese: Eh, it’s worth it for the much lower utility bills. Y’all know how much power dryers take, but I can do that during the day for free. Probably feed more into the power grid than I take out.

(I have problem glasses too, they dig into my ears. What’s wrong with yours?)

The Phantom Cheese, Wearer of Problem Glasses
The Phantom Cheese, Wearer of Problem Glasses
1 year ago

@ GSS ex-noob:

“Problem glasses” was a meme a while back- it referred to what some people call “Cat’s Eye” glasses, i.e. not wire frames. So it was bashing women who wear glasses. Full disclosure: I’m a dude,but I need Coke-bottle lenses to see my hand in front of my face, and I say if you have to wear glasses, the wilder, the better. Think Elton John.

GSS ex-noob
GSS ex-noob
1 year ago

@Phantom Cheese: I’ve been wearing glasses since kindergarten, but haven’t had cat’s eye shape in decades — doesn’t suit my face shape. I used to wear wire, but since my lenses get thicker each time, I’m back to thin plastic frames because even the thinnest lenses can’t be put in wire. My brother wears boring glasses because his eyesight is marginally better than mine. Mom used to say if she’d had another kid, it would have been born with glasses on, and wouldn’t that have been painful.

That meme shows Dorothy Parker was right.

I salute your Elton-esque flair. I have a backup pair that are small but they’re also purple. Previous backup was green, which I wore to see Elton last year.

The Phantom Cheese, Wearer of Problem Glasses
The Phantom Cheese, Wearer of Problem Glasses
1 year ago

@ GSS ex-noob:
I just can’t do those boomer frameless “please don’t notice I’m wearing glasses” glasses…

GSS ex-noob
GSS ex-noob
1 year ago

@Phantom Cheese: Me neither. My glasses have always been too thick to fit into those frames. And it’s not like those actually fool anyone.

Jazzlet
Jazzlet
1 year ago

For me it’s not about fooling anyone else, it’s that I don’t like having lines around my field of vision. I have completely frameless ones, they are the lightest glasses I’ve owned, which both my nose and ears appreciate. It makes a lot of difference in how I feel, even though I can’t really see if I’m not looking though the lenses just having the blur makes me feel less boxed in, and I do see movement in my peripheral vision, so the dogs had to work harder to sneak up on me.