Despite their deep pessimism about pretty much everything else, incels do look forward to one thing: the eventual arrival of sexy lady robots that will not only have sex with them but who will also strip flesh-and-blood ladies of their sexual monopoly.
As one budding incel futurist called blackraven explains on the Incels.is forums, with the
arrival of (easily affordable, realistic and overall finished product) sexbots … the STDridden roasties that don’t have anything else to offer [will] lose their status and society returns to normalcy.
There’s one obvious problem with this scenario, though, and that’s the fact that sexbots will be available to women as well as men. But fear not, incels, for blackraven is here to tell you that women won’t enjoy their sexbots like men will because, well, they’re all a bunch of vile ungrateful c*nts who want a human Chad to use and abuse them.
RoboChads won’t be Chads at all; they’ll be Nice Guys, and women hate that.
Women will hate how their chadbot is always at home, doesn’t raise the voice over set limit, doesn’t call her bad names, listens to her ramblings for hours and then tries to provide useful advice.
Also, and perhaps more importantly, they won’t have bragging rights if they’re just fucking a robot.
[E]ven if robot somehow managed to accomplish every single command, in a way female wanted them to (which most likely wouldn’t happen and they would flood support email to release Abuse Me and Treat me like slut mode) , they would still be unhappy.
Because foids are dumb groupthinking creatures
While I’m sure you brocels are kind gentlemen, foids are vile c*nts. You could give them the very best thing and they couldn’t enjoy their if other females have it. I don’t even need to put the infamous “Oh my god she has the same dress as me” instagram meme that has existed for decades and I’m not sure if it will ever die off.
Meanwhile, men will be happy other men get to enjoy the same RobyStacies as they do because, apparently, men are never competitive with each other when it comes to women and material things and (robot) women who are material things.
While men will share scripts, macros, extensions and best settings for RoboC*nt , women will get absolutely rampant that their work colleague can get the same quality of RoboChad. She wouldn’t be able to brag about it, nor virtuesignal that she pulled RoboChad with her great personality.
In short, blackraven concludes,
Angry feminazis screeching that RoboChad will replace men and demand to treat them like queens is false, because no matter how advanced robots get foids will deliberately wish for the version that treats them worse.
And even after getting the abusive boyfriend robot experience foids will seethe the fact that
• she can’t pretend she attracted the RoboChad with her amazing personality
• she can’t pretend to have any drama going on, since robots are programmed to fix problems
• no bragging rights that her Robochad is unique, every other foid can have it and launch the same scripts
• RoboChad will likely burn down when trying to fix foid made up problems with logic gatesMen on the other hand, wouldn’t care about the fact that most other guys have the same model of robot and happily share the best configuration for each task on facebook groups, subreddits and discord chats.
Dude, right now, many men, including most incels, are so threatened by the fact that women use plain old fashioned sex toys that they can’t enjoy sex toys for men. You think you’ll do better when women have sexbots? I don’t think the utopia you dream of will ever arrive, largely because you’re a bunch of jealous ungrateful little psychopaths who will likely abuse your sexbots so thoroughly you’ll go broke buying replacement models. Once again, the incel “critique” of women is heavy on projection and light on sense.
It’s true that many women (and many men, for that matter) won’t end up satisfied by sexbots because sexbots aren’t, you know, people. It’s one thing to have sex with a machine; it’s another to fall in love with one.
Incels are less about love than they are about jealousy. I guarantee that when the sexbots come, no matter how fancy and lifelike they are, incels will still feel jealous of the men having sex with flesh-and-blood women. “RoboCels” will be a thing. Because that’s how incels work.
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Don’t forget the elephant in the room: if they end up being a thing this decade, only the ultra rich will be able to afford them. Can’t let the plebians have anything that valuable now, can we?
I just assume sex bots will spy on users and sell their data.
If a sexbot can deliver a good footrub, I’d be tempted. Fortunately Mr. Parasol already gives great footrubs.
My goodness, this man needs help.
lord, with the iRobot photo upload scandal already, the very last thing I would want in my house is something that’s DESIGNED for intimacy and connected to the Internet of Things undoubtedly uploading every minute of it to some server to “train the algorithm.” and probably also to be accessed by aforementioned incels for a monthly subscription fee to jack into (hah) a VR experience.
To paraphrase Luke Skywalker…
“Amazing. Everything Mr. blackraven said was wrong.”
I don’t usually follow the sorts of stories; they just make me despair for humanity. However I did once click on one of the links. Most of the comments were as you might expect. Although I did like one of them:
“I dunno. I’m so lazy I’ll probably just buy a male sexbot to fuck my female sexbot.”
Actually I remember reading somewhere that the first “sex doll” was made for women, not men. Makes sense when you consider vibrators and dildos. I think virtual reality worlds will outpace Robochads and Robostacies though. This youtuber often talks about her “companion doll” and she’s saving up for more tech advanced ones. She’s says the human race is getting too dangerous with all these shooters out here and STIs. She recommends dolls for women instead of dating.
“So many women in our community are poppin’ up dead all over the place.”
@Alan, that is legitimately funny. are we sure an incel wrote it?
“Rampant”?
Dudecel, do you even englishcel?
I may have figured out a minor flaw in our new friend’s logic, ever so small as it may be: What if, and hear me out here, a woman were to enjoy her RoboChad for purely physical reasons, then go out and satisfy her competitive desire to stick it to that other Stacy down the street by still attracting a nice looking/rich HumanChad?
Speaking of the future, we had our space launch!
We successfully launched seven satellites!
Into the ocean.
As we know more about the moon than we do the abyssal depths, may I be the first to congratulate the Cornish space programme for their pioneering exploration of the seas.
@Alan Robertshaw
I saw that. I also thought, it was very hilarious, that every single outlet I read a story on it from (I read mostly non-US newspapers as my basic filter of horrible gun death stories and wretched US politics, only diving into those subjects when I specifically have the mental fortitude) was very careful to mention that Virgin Orbit is an American company and by extension, this must be the Americans’ fault.
I mean it totally could be that Virgin Orbit sucks and this was totally avoidable, but I just don’t think that “because they are American and Americans suck at space” is good logic.
Can I get a full-body massage bot?
@ BTD
It was my B’day so some friends took me out; otherwise I was going to go to the launch. But Spaceport Cornwall had been big on expectation management. Just been checking in with people who went. They loved it. They put on a space themed silent disco with a sort of ‘oh, and there might be a space rocket’ vibe.
Personally I suspect this is all just a cover for a Cornish missile programme. Stop Devon getting the cream/jam thing wrong, once and for all.
(They’ve lost telemetry on the rocket; but it’s definitely somewhere between space and the seabed)
@ Alan Robertshaw
To be fair, in intergalactic terms, that means it’s sitting on top of their heads
@ .45
True. Although I guess the flipside is that they had the entire universe to aim at. How do you miss that?
Still, this is good practice for a Europa or Enceladus mission.
And as BTD points out, it was the American bit that didn’t work. The silent disco went off without a hitch.
The incel/black pill “lookism” concept made wikipedia:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lookism
SpecialFFrog: Of course they’ll spy on their users — that would be part of their main objective, which is to please their owners in every way possible. That will require them to learn as much as they can about their respective owners’ needs and personalities. And of course they’d have to get information from all manner of sources via the Internet, probably on a daily if not hourly basis — which would include comparing notes and pooling data/experiences with other sexbots…which would mean all those cyborg women talking about their men, not only behind their backs but in realtime as they interact with their respective owners.
Let that sink in, incels. I’m guessing that will scare them even more than the prospect of vendors and advertizers selling or hacking all that personal data.
Well I think David’s summed it up.
They don’t realize how many women are already extremely fond of their vibrators. And how we’d share programming too. And how much of a relief it would be to have a big strong sexbot that wouldn’t mansplain or whine. Especially for the non-Staceys of the world who then could be free of trash men like incels. No assholes mansplaining and whining about how they need someone else to do all the housework while they sit around online with their jerk-off pals (heh). One FOAF is a very attractive and active woman in her 70s and she is sick of all the men who want to marry her so she’ll have to clean and cook for them. No. She took care of one perfectly good husband, including nursing till his end and she isn’t about to do it again.
Bring on the bots, I say! It just means the incels are going to lose out to *both* Chads and RoboChads, and get even fewer women. Hope they get full replacement insurance on their StaceyBots — presumably the Chads will.
And the lower-income incels (most of them?) are still going to only be able to afford Fleshlight-type things and maybe a subscription-based voice track telling them how Chadly they are. Maybe with a free microwave for their Hot Pockets.
@Vicky P: The Mr. isn’t good at footrubs. I wonder if we’ll be able to get just the parts (ahem) of a sexbot we want. Good massage hands would sell to everyone regardless of gender or looks. Foot massage bots are probably not going to transmit very interesting data, and be cheaper. I would like a massage bot like @Elaine says. Doesn’t even have to have a personality. Or a face.
@Alan: I didn’t think the ocean off Cornwall was “abyssal”. Anyway, since they couldn’t get much beyond the 35K feet, @BTD’s right that “Americans can’t do space” is… not the flex they think it is. Several X-15 pilots got higher than that in the early 60s, the Telstar satellites went up at that time too, and ISTR there was a lot of talk 50-something years ago about that whole Moon thing. (I recently found the scrapbook I made of that!)
Maybe it’s just that anything branded “Virgin” can’t do space. Muskrat has consistently at least managed to deliver stuff to orbit. Bezos has flown some people and cargo fairly regularly. But Branson has, um… had guys do test flights and one trip into space for himself — all suborbital though. So expecting Virgin to launch something into proper orbit was really too much to ask.
@Love Is All: They’ve been claiming VR (and AI*) was just around the corner for decades and it really never improves that much, no matter how much money’s put into it. I have yet (after 35+ years of being near to Silicon Valley) to find a VR implementation that doesn’t make me queasy. Tried it in the 80s and 90s, tried it recently with much more computing power — still barf provoking.
@Raging Bee: I like the way you think.
*I was a young very junior cook and bottle washer on an AI project in the 80s. About 5 years ago, I ran across my old boss online and we had a good laugh about how it’s still 10 years away! (He never bought into the hype, because he knew better.)
Alan:
Practicing to hit a planet at close range with a gravity-assisted guidance system.
Hello.
Can not wait for sexbots to blackmail for sextape release, or suddenly remote controlled bots which empty your crypto wallet…
> Crip Dyke
Maybe he is a heraldicel ?
Have a nice day.
The more things change each
Boys want sexy robots has existed since Metropolis. But they will always become competitive about them.
Many happy returns, @Alan! (for yesterday, not for the rocket.
As @Lumipuna observes, they managed to hit at least one celestial body which is a start 🙂 )
In the process of looking for something completely unrelated, I happened upon this three-way collision of exotica, psychedelia, and hey-baby-we’re-in-the-Space Age! futurism by…that easy listening factory of the 50’s through 70’s, 101 Strings. You’d think that a piece entitled, “A Disappointed Love With a Desensitized Robot” would be an exercise in Numanesque dystopian glumness.