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The only way to understand the female is through the mastery of semen: Insights into “female nature” from, well, you can probably figure out where they’re from

Semen retention failure

Fellas! Do you remain baffled by the mysteries of Female Nature?That’s probably because you’re trying to understand women by trying to understand women. Because it turns out, according to this dude I found in the semen retention subreddit, the only way to master female nature is by first mastering your semen (and not master-bating).

“Since the begining of time, women have understood female and masculine nature without any effort,” explains theuniverseitselff.

For a man to understand either of the two on the other hand, requires retention. Even if you improve your ‘game’ as a man, if you remain unaware of the reality of semen and its effects, you will never understand women.

At least until you take your first step on the semen path to semen enlightenment.

The only pathway to understand what a female is is through the mastery of semen.

When a non-semen-pilled man looks at a woman he falls into her trap.

When you look at a new woman for the first time, that very first second your eyes focus on her and notice her, mechanisms which have been developed throughout years of evolution take place. In the man who is unaware of his nature, it’s all unconscious, literally. The part of him that looks at the woman and evaluates her it’s completely out of his control; he is trapped within it. He enjoys it, he protects his ego, unaware that it is a mortal trap.

Well crap.

He created this personality throughout years of sexual misconduct.

Uh, he did what through WHAT?

That man, can be controlled like a puppet, by males or females it doesn’t matter. That man will enter relationships without having any authority or say in it whatsoever, that man is inferior to women. If women procreate with him, it will only be because they haven’t had any access to a retainer.

That is, a dude who doesn’t masturbate, not one of those things you put in your mouth.

Most advanced retainers know, they just know, how disloyal women can be when confronted with a real retainer. If the man she’s with doesn’t know anything about semen and lost his edge long ago by having too much sex with her, and the woman is next to a real life retainer, that woman is in danger.

I guess all that retained semen exerts some kind of gravitational pull on her, even though “it’s not like a retainer would be interested on her anyway.”

Meanwhile your typical semen-unmastered fellow is pretty much hopeless with women.

These men love women, make huge efforts; that is not what women want. Women want you to retain your semen, nothing more.

NOTHING MORE. Just the semen thing.

After that, you can treat her like shit, she’ll take it. She’ll love you for it. After all you are sacrificing your very life for her, although if you are smart you won’t have sex with her.

I am getting a little confused again.

If [women] don’t happen to find destiny, the powerful retainer, something they’ve always longed for, they will settle for the most similar guy to it, and they’ll be with him only because the true retainer hasn’t called her yet.

And the true retainer will truly cuck things up for the seman-ignorant man. Even though the retainer isn’t interested in anything as crude and primitive as a women any more.

The life of a guy who does not retain can not be solved just with a bit of retention; yes, retention is key, but the retention moves in flow with the rest of his life, both intertwined and inseparable. Women love the man who is free, because that is the quality the man who retains has. He values himself over women, he will not put the woman on a pedestal.

LLRetaining J. (Ladies Love Retaining Jay.)

Society is made by these [semen-unenlightened] men, it raises them, they protect it. … [W]hat the MAJORITY believes in, the message they dictate [is that men should] be sheep, and close their eyes to new possibilities. Men unconscious of their sexuality, unaware of their power. And women who get used to deal with these men.

Gosh, it sounds like men and women both would be happier if men truly appreciated the power of their own semen.

So, that very first moment you look at the woman, she has been preparing throughout all of history for that moment.

Uh what?

For you, it may just be you looking naively at something attractive, you feeling some inner fun that nobody else sees.

Feeling some inner fun that nobody else sees.

But, yes, it’s not merely that women are designed to see: their whole lives revolves around it. Women, same as men, are not free from sexual desire. For us, it means that when we look at a beautiful woman we like it, for them, it means they want you to look. The same drive you feel that drives you to feel beauty when you look at a beautiful woman, a woman feels towards dressing beautiful for you.

Ok, wait, where is semen in all this?

[W]omen know a man to the core. They are born with that knowledge. And it worked pretty well because the man who raises and controls his instincts is rare, they adapt to the men they have to deal with.

They have to adapt to a world of semen-spilling wusses.

So, understand. Everything you feel, your pride, satisfaction, your failures, your successes, anything you do, anything you try; who you are as a man, your status and your happiness. All that, a woman knows.

Ok. She knows all that (somehow), just by looking at you.

So, at this point, it would be wise to walk away, at least temporarily.

Wait, what?

If you feel like you’ve been living a lie, you should walk your own path until you arrive to someplace you can call home.

Just don’t fall into any semen-quicksand on the way.

Unwise minds would use this info in bad faith: I’ve done it. I’ve made women fall in love with me so hard, I’ve been literally worshiped…

Very believable, women love dudes who post impenetrable screeds in the semen retention subreddit.

I remember this one woman, she HAD to make me fall for her, all she did was try to seduce me and give me gifts all the time, that’s how uncommon a retainer is.

If you retain your semen women will shower you with gifts. .

And all I had to do in return was… Nothing. Just lay down and enjoy the show. All because I retained my semen and I also understood female nature.

Ah, but you can’t forget that mastering your semen renders you indifferent when it comes to women.

It’s a dangerous game though. Obviously I don’t care anymore, I’m passed that ego point, I can be at the top or at bottom in terms of female success: I don’t care and I’ll be the same.

Yeah, you sound like you really don’t care and not at all like you’re just pretending not to care.

No woman is special, you are special. Men do not chase women, women chase men. Female nature will be destructive for most men including retainers. There is nothing to gain from women, this should be always clear.

So semen retention is a kind of MGTOW thing now?

It’s your own happiness, your own retention, if you follow the path of a woman, you’ll end up losing your power unless you know how to be the rock standing still in the river.

The furiously horny rock vibrating with lust in the river.

To know if you are ready to get into a relationship, ask yourself, can I still improve as a single retainer? Have I stopped all emissions of semen including NE [nocturnal emissions]? Have I reached all my potential and even if I retained for one more year it wouldn’t get better than this?

Than being a rock standing in a river?

The answer to these question may surprise you: your potential is infinite. If you know how to overcome nocturnal emissions, each day of your life you’ll be happier, each day of your life if you chose a woman she would fall in love with you even harder. Each day you’ll become more powerful, be more in control, women will be puppets to your control, and you won’t even care.

This is really turning into a supervillain monologue, huh?

And this take us to the second point: SOCIETY HATES SINGLE MALE RETAINERS… To be continued .

As far as I can tell he never continued this. Probably too busy not masturbating … and not caring what women think.

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19 Comments
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Crip Dyke
2 years ago

I can’t stop thinking of “retainers” as things that hold your teeth in place. Makes this article a very weird read.

PinkDaisy
PinkDaisy
2 years ago

Not being a native speaker, I think I’ve been exposed to the word “retainer” through D&D. So basically hireling, henchmen etc., someone who you pay to take a long on your adventures and who fights and/or carries loot for you.

“You think flashy bards and strong fighters win the love of the elf maiden you just freed in dungeon level 7? No, they only have eyes and pointy ears for your retainers!”

Dang you, Nodwick, first you wouldn’t enter the Corridor of Very Likely Doom and we had to waste a Summon Monster scroll to trigger those traps, and now this?

Chris Oakley
Chris Oakley
2 years ago

Just seeing the headline creeps me out.

occasional reader
occasional reader
2 years ago

So, semen retentionists are malinists who do nothing (except eating bonbons, probably) and are showered with gifts by women in the hope of sexual intercourses…
Strange, where did i hear this kind of ludicrous stereotypical depiction ? /s

Sol
Sol
2 years ago

Sounds like dialogue from Conan the Barbarian. WHAT IS THE RIDDLE OF SEMEN?

ObSidJag
ObSidJag
2 years ago

Well, after reading all (ok, most) of that verbiage, all I can say is “what a wanker.”

Mimi Haha
Mimi Haha
2 years ago

This looks suspiciously like it’s written in English, yet it makes no sense at all.

Allandrel
Allandrel
2 years ago

I’m still trying to figure out how mot wanking grants “knowledge of semen.” Does getting backed up just spontaneously download information into your brain? It might explain this essay.

Hambeast
Hambeast
2 years ago

Don’t know why, but I never felt like chasing men who weren’t interested in sex, let alone worshipping or gift-showering them. If there were men like this back in the 80s/90s, I was never aware of them.

But if their potential is truly limitless, maybe they can achieve oneness with the astral plane or whatever and we’ll never have to hear from them again!

Then again, if they really didn’t care about women, we wouldn’t hear about or from them anyway. They also wouldn’t have to recruit by strongly implying that absolute control of women was just a year of non-wanking away.

Tabby Lavalamp
Tabby Lavalamp
2 years ago

I’ve been literally worshiped…

[shrine citation needed]

Kietazou
Kietazou
2 years ago

 To be continued .”

SAME BATSHIT-SHIT TIME! SAME BATSHIT-CRAZY CHANNEL!

The idea that I, when I sit and have a cup of coffee somewhere or am standing at the supermarket checkout, may occasionally be within two meters of this guy, in one of his myriad, pitiful, lost, stubbornly-stupid forms makes me very sad.

Literally sad.

At least he sounds unlikely to harm anyone else.

GSS ex-noob
GSS ex-noob
2 years ago

Well, that sure was a lot of words.

@David: thanks for explaining what this boy means by “retainer”, because as someone who went to *college* still wearing the dental appliance, I was all “wait wut?”

But I hope he’s got a good urologist on call, because if you stop ALL ejaculation, your prostate’s gonna complain. Does he put a cork in it at night?

Allandrel
Allandrel
2 years ago

I’m morbidly curious as to what aspect of semen they think is so magical. Presumably the sperm? Does that mean that someone with a vasectomy counts as retaining, because they aren’t losing any sperm? (Well, not from ejaculating, they do of course have a finite lifespan and as I understand get broken down and recycled by the body.) Or is it entirely mystical?

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
2 years ago

@ allandrel

Full Metal Ox
Full Metal Ox
2 years ago

@Sol:

Sounds like dialogue from Conan the Barbarian. WHAT IS THE RIDDLE OF SEMEN?

The one I’d always heard, which needs to be spoken aloud for proper effect, was:

Q. What do you call a hollow cylinder full of semen?

A. A submarine. (The homonymic play, of course, is on “seamen.”)

John
John
2 years ago

Wait… women are uncontrollably attracted to men who “retain their semen”. Is that supposed to be a good thing? Because he sure spends a lot of time bragging about how irresistible not wanking has made him.

But then his point seems to be “Women will want to have sex with you… DON’T DO IT!” Presumably because they will drain you of your retained power, rendering you less attractive to women…who you don’t don’t actually want anyway…??

Okay, my brain is tired. I don’t even want to figure it out now.

Allandrel
Allandrel
2 years ago

@Sol

Nothing in this world can you trust. Not men, not women, not beasts.

::points to testicles::

This you can trust.

Last edited 2 years ago by Allandrel
milotha
milotha
2 years ago

So many words for “I can’t stop fapping and I hate myself for it”