The folks on the NoFapChristian subreddit are not exactly fans of Satan or his ongoing efforts to ruin their no-fap streaks by seducing them into looking at porn. But I haven’t seen any discussions of Satan and porn get quite as weird as the one I encountered there today.
It seems that one no-Fapper called daplaya9 has recently discovered that, as he puts it, “PORN is the main tool the devil uses to feminize men.” In fact, he did a little experiment to prove it.
They say eyes are the windows to the soul…
So when we consume porn & absorb those unrealistic images/videos through the eyes, it wrecks havoc on the spiritual & physical body.
Daplaya9 starts off by talking about dopamine, the “feel-good ” hormone, and prolactin, which he calls “”the ‘anti-dopamine” chemical that is used to balance out high dopamine & bring the body back to homeostasis.”
I’m no expert, but from what I can tell from a quick Googling is that dopamine can both inhibit and encourage prolactin release.
I know men are visual creatures. But men also rely heavily on testosterone to be men. So when our dopamine is artificially spiked through viewing porn, our prolactin is also artificially spiked.
Am I right in thinking he’s just kind of making this up as he goes along?
Why is this relevant to men? Prolactin is not only anti-dopamine but it’s also an anti-testosterone chemical. So in short, we are ARTIFICIALLY lowering our testosterone watching porn in ways that masturbating with imagination or sex do not.
Why would porn have any affect on how much dopamine you release while masturbating? Surely you can enjoy a little wank without porn. And good sex can release a lot more dopamine than a mere wank.
Anyway, according to the first article that came up when I Googled this, Daplaya9’s grand thesis is just not true. Masturbation doesn’t affect testosterone in the long run. While you’re masturbating, it goes up some and then drops back to normal.
But Daplaya9 apparently doesn’t trust this science. So he decided to make some science of his own.
To test this hypothesis, I decided to do a little experiment. Keeping variables the same (sleep,diet, exercise, etc.) I decided to watch porn and masturbate until I finished. Afterwards I felt extremely lethargic, my skin started to break out, & my scalp became itchy & I noticed hairloss.
Dude, there is no conceivable way that masturbating caused you to lose your hair immediately afterwards.
It’s at this point the story takes a little swerve.
A few days later I do a different test, I recruit a friend to give me a blowjob in a pitch black room, until completion.
You did WHAT?
Afterwards, there were almost NONE of the ill effects I had when I masturbated to porn.
Maybe your very obliging friend is just really good at the beejes. .
Also the post nut clarity effect was more pronounced in this scenario whereas after cumming to porn I still desired to watch more just 15 minutes later.
You didn’t want another free blowjob?
This was my findings, our main enemy is not feeling sexual pleasure, it is artificially absorbing dopamine through our eyes, & crashing our testosterone!!
Dude, the real “findings” here are that you were able to finagle yourself a blowjob by claiming you were doing it for science.
The reaction of the others in the subreddit was, to put it mildly, mixed. A few thanked Daplaya9 for his, er, input. Several took him to task for doing something sexual before marriage. One commenter chided him for telling his little blowjob story because it might cause others in the subreddit to “relapse.”
Still another decided Daplaya9 was probably trapped in an abusive relationship because in a previous thread he said a friend of his “ritually sodomized” him on a monthly basis and the commenter assumed the blowjob friend was probably the same person as the sodomy, er, friend.
Science sure is weird.
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Sounds like he was looking for an excuse to get a blow job from his probably male friend. For science. Yeah right.
Reminds me of an idea going around some years ago that masturbation contributed to homosexuality because it was a sexual act that did not involve the opposite sex.
I really thought this is where he was going until he didn’t go there.
If you cloned yourself or your future self came back in time or parallel universe you crossed over or something; and you got a bit frisky, would that technically be gay sex or masturbation?
I do sometimes miss the “Haw haw haw!” from every Chick tract.
@Alan Robertshaw:
If you created a normal clone of yourself, that’s an easy question: double incest. Because your clone is basically both your child and your sibling. Also you are probably a terrible person.
If you’re a “hive mind” (the usual sci-fi concept of the sapient hive mind is better described as “distributed mind” because it works differently than a true hive mind) spread across multiple bodies, then interaction between separate bodies is masturbation.
If you created an exact copy clone with all your current memories, it depends on whether you subscribe to the continuity theory of identity (incest) or pattern theory of identity (masturbation). Incidentally they’re both kind of wrong, so… Also, you’ve created a situation where “is this masturbation or incest” should be the least of your concerns.
If time travel is involved… it’s neither and both. Also, if you don’t subscribe to a particular theory of identity then exact copy clones are kind of neither and kind of both and also kind of 🤷🏻♀️ . This ambiguous situation is known in more fetishy circles as “selfcest”.
Alternate universes/realities… incest, assuming minor/no genetic differences because the two of you aren’t the same people. Main exception being if you’re from two different timelines which diverged from some point during your lifetimes (assuming many worlds theory of physics), in which case it’s basically time travel, except sideways, so selfcest.
If you want to really want to cause all manner of definitional headaches, split yourself in half and regenerate each half so they have exact copies of the other half.
Dude, according to very, very reliable folklore, masturbation causes hair to grow — on the palms of the hands. Are you sure you’re doing this masturbation thing right?
So he’s blaming fap for his male pattern baldness (which is a high testosterone condition), and having a guy give him a blow job is only for science. Sure, Jan.
He needs to just realize he’s a balding gay or bi man, come out of the (literal dark room!) closet, and start having sex like non-fundie Christians do.
And why does he call himself “daplaya”? I was under the impression that playas have All The Sex (with other people). False advertising.
Hormones and the endocrine system as a subject is very very close to evo-psych in popularity with guys who know nothing but presume they know everything. A man who told me with supreme confidence that humans have 200 chromosomes (he did not accept my correction!) was also very forthcoming on the human hormonal system.
@Lollypop
Is this why fundies and the right hate trans people so much? Because unlike them we actually know how hormones work?
@Kat: I thought maybe he’d just really into hairpulling and made a homemade hairpulling of some sort. Or maybe he has a shaving fetish. Who even knows at this point.
Alan and Snowberry, Are you referencing “All you Zombies”? If not, you might want to take a look.
Well, that’s why the company is called 200andMe, right?
@ barkdog
It probably was lurking in my subconscious.
The time travel thing was from a book called The Fall of Chronopolis. It’s only a minor bit of backstory, but it gets very complicated in that. Someone is dating a version of himself that he traveled in time to pick up from an older version of himself. But he lives with the inevitable knowledge that one day he will be the older version himself and get dumped for his younger self.
@Muscovy Duck
It’s definitely one of those “a little knowledge is a dangerous thing” situations and I’m sure any greater understanding would just slide off them because it doesn’t always fit their worldview. And I have no doubt those guys would still happily talk over any far more well informed trans person on the subject.
@Gaebolga
Ha! That made me chuckle
In the real world we have 46, so in this hypothetical surely it would be called 100andMe?
Various species’ chromosome counts, for interested parties (spoiler: Homo sapiens gets a participation trophy):
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_organisms_by_chromosome_count
@ full metal ox
Yeah; but in your face Garlic!
On a side note, the Edible Frog should team up with the European Edible Dormouse and send someone round to taxonomists with a baseball bat.
As someone explosed to porn of cartoon characters at a very early age, I can confirm there is no magic in porn that MAKES one masturbate as I am still firmly asexual and generally bored by erotica and such today. Tho I will forever be baffled by some of the kinks people were working out in the late 2000s thru Yugioh sexytimes fanfics.
@Kat,
Clearly what masturbation actually causes is hair redistribution! The follicles move from the top of your head to your palms. SCIENCE!
@Barkdog: I’ve read “All You Zombies”, and this is not a reference to that (though it might have originally inspired the concept, no idea). Rather this is something which comes up every now and then, because somebody wonders if having sex with another version of yourself counts as one or the other. It’s been debated to death for decades, though, and the generally accepted answer is “it depends on what you mean by ‘another version of yourself’.” Some of the possibilities are easier to answer than others, and the situations where nobody can agree because it breaks the normal definition of both words are a sort of blended concept known as “selfcest”.
Another example of something which comes up now and then which has been debated for decades: “How many people is an orgy?” And the generally agreed upon dividing line is 5. Five people can be a fivesome or an orgy depending on how the situation is approached, but 6 or more is definitely an orgy. It’s also generally agreed that 5-7 is kind of a pathetic orgy and you probably need at least 8 for a decent one (though some people would put that line a bit higher).
@Kereea: I never saw those Yugioh fanfics, but I did see a lot of Ranma ½ and Sailor Moon fanfics in the late 1990s / early 2000s, some of which were clearly written by young people exploring their sexuality (and in the case of Ranma, sometimes gender identity as well).
@GSS ex-noob:
Who’s Jan? I feel I’m missing some context here.
“Cuckoo! Cuckoo!”
@Snowberry:
This gives a whole new meaning to “ship of Theseus”.
@Moggie Best Ship of Theseus joke since the captcha.
@Moggie: That was excellent. Haven’t heard that good of a Ship of Theseus reference since “WandaVision” (and that one wasn’t funny).