He Took It Out: Elon Musk is trending on Twitter because he (allegedly) showed an employee his penis and then offered to buy her a horse

@Anonymous: I don’t think anyone claims he owns Twitter yet.

Some people are saying he doesn’t really want to own Twitter, he wants to sabotage the company which does. And he’s willing to take the $1M penalty just to attempt to do so. That’s just as much speculation as anything else, as his over-all actions don’t make a whole lot of sense.

Then again, you’d think that if he were trying to sabotage them, he’d at least try not to be obvious about it, so his sabotage wouldn’t necessarily look like sabotage at first…

I also forgot to mention: speaking from personal experience, autism does not excuse being a terrible person and it’s shit like this that makes all autistics look bad.

Some of his fan boys would be happier if they just admitted *they* want to see his penis.

I saw a guy expose himself to the world in general on a busy street in San Francisco one afternoon. I was at the bus stop. He was wandering around and yelling. When the bus pulled up, I got on and took a seat by myself. Ten minutes later a man sat down next to me. I was outraged, revolted, and worried that he too was gonna take it out. But he was cool.

100% coincidentally, third season of Love, Death & Robots that popped out yesterday at Netflix, with “Three Robots: Exit Strategy” episode is hilariously well-timed right now. Go watch it, it is under ten minutes. 🤭🤭🤭

describe just one thing, anything at all (scars, tattoos,…) that isn’t known by the public. She won’t be able to do so, because it never happened.

She won’t be able to do so, because a) we don’t have as much gray matter devoted to penis recognition as we do facial recognition b) distinctive markings like scars, tattoos, piercings aren’t that common on penises c) as soon as it was nonconsensually taken out, she likely turned away in disgust, rather than bending down for a closer look and lovingly memorizing its every curve. What a ridiculous and unreasonable demand. “Describe my dick in accurate, microscopic detail or else I get to say you’re a liar.”

The flight-attendant-as-masseuse thing is pretty gross in and of itself.

@ buttercup

“Describe my dick in accurate, microscopic detail or else I get to say you’re a liar.”

That actually cropped up in some Michael Jackson cases.

An English newspaper published an account by someone* claiming to have been abused by Jackson.

Jackson sued for defamation. He said that he had never been naked with the complainant. The complainant however had described some particular features of Jackson’s genitals. The court ordered that Jackson had to submit to an examination by a doctor of the newspaper’s choosing who could report back on the issue. Jackson elected not to undergo the examination and so his claim against the paper was stuck out.

Later there were criminal proceedings in the US arising from the same allegation. In those, Jackson was actually compelled to have the examination.

That case ultimately went nowhere as the family of the complainant withdrew the allegations after a settlement was made. Which sounds familiar.

Having said that, generally I wouldn’t read too much into the fact someone made a settlement. Whilst it can often be because the person didn’t want to scrutiny of a trial; there are very valid reasons why even innocent parties make payouts.

Although I do find the allegations against Musk worthy of investigation.

(Not saying he definitely did it. Just Chase Level 3 in case he sues me.)

[*There’s a convention here that we don’t name complainants in sexual abuse cases; and it’s one I follow]

@Alan Robertshaw:

That actually cropped up in some Michael Jackson cases.

I seem to recall that it also came up during Bill Clinton’s impeachment, involving the revelation that he suffers from Peyronie’s Disease.

I’ve known a couple of masseuses, and they talked about how their training emphasized that it was “not bad touching” and also not sexual in nature. Consent was considered a necessary part of the experience.

Now, if Elon Musk wants to hire someone to give him “happy ending” massages, whatever, but make that part of the job duty description. I don’t really get the Elon fanboys who seem to think that you should just expect to see a penis in all its glory if you’re working for a billionaire.

Also, what Buttercup said. The only penis I know well enough to identify belongs to Mr. Parasol, because I have YEARS of seeing it. Anybody else’s penis is none of my business.

@Battering Lamb:

What does the 69,420 tweet reference?

Snickering adolescent naughtiness that I assure you was around long before that sweet 90’s child was conceived: 69 as in mutual oral sex; 420 as in marijuana (which originated from a particular California friend group’s custom of sneaking off for a weed break at that hour of the afternoon: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/420_(cannabis_culture)

I commend the Twittererer who found the pic of the guy carrying a horse.

I know plenty of autistics and Aspies, and all of them know better than to whip out any body parts. Most of them are quite the opposite! They barely shake hands (pre-Covid), nothing else is going to be in view.

I have to say, at least 99% of the Teslas I see being driven are being driven by jerks and assholes, mostly douchebros who look/act as though they’d do this sort of thing themselves. They cut you off in traffic, careen across all the lanes with no blinker, park crossways and in handicapped spaces, etc. People driving other kinds of all-electric cars don’t do this. There’s one guy in a fucking bright red Lamborghini (vroom vroom) I see regularly, and even he doesn’t drive as badly/rudely as the creeps in the cheapest Teslas.

I try not to need to return things to Amazon, because I have to go to the Whole Foods with the tiny parking lot to do it, and dear Lord, save me from the entitled yuppie scum. @Surplus is right, it’s affluenza — pure entitlement and lack of empathy.

To end on a happier note, I love that @Jorts the Cat on his Twitter refers to Musk and Bezos as “space jerks”. Not sexist, ableist, racist or anything else, just “whiny space jerks. Space does not need your bullshit”. He calls the Calif. supremo “Governor Haircut”, as in “Sign the farm workers’ bill, you haircut.”

@Vicky P: I could probably pick out Mr. xn’s penis in a lineup, but there’s no distinctive features about it. It’s a standard mid-century White guy model, and does the standard things. It’s worked for both of us for decades, and like you I’m not much interested in random ones. I saw a bunch at the naturist club we used to occasionally attend with friends who belonged, but it’s rude to stare. Mostly they… were penises where the color matched with the rest of their skin? And they sorta flapped around limply?