Semen is “the real Elixir of the human body,” so DO NOT WASTE IT even if you sort of want to, like REALLY want to, and I mean would it be that big a deal if you did?

The guys in the Semen Retention subreddit are just really, really, really into their own semen “the real Elixir of the human body.”

How much is “really, really, really” — really? Consider this little manifesto, currently the number three (unstickied) post on their subreddit.

For best results, read out loud, slowly, in the deepest voice you can manage.

Well, that’s certainly something.

Now that you have absorbed the full text — much as the body absorbs any semen that’s been sitting out unused for too long — let’s take a closer look at some of the more, well, let’s say seminal bits.

We all are developed from a 5 micrometre long cell called as Spermcell.

Just imagine the potential it has. What a powerful thing..!

Well, no more so than the egg. You remember that eggs are involved in that whole reproduction thing, too right?

DO NOT WASTE IT AT ANY COST.

Uh, how is it any less wasteful to have the body reabsorb semen that isn’t all fapped out. Technically, only a tiny microscopic percentage of sperm is “used” to get someone pregnant, so you could say that all but the fastest sperm cell (sent eggwards during unprotected vaginal sex) is wasted. Or you could recognize that your body is built to make all the replacement sperm you’ll ever need and then some.

All the great minds ever happened , I bet their brain made wonders only because they rigorously retained their semen.

What a powerful and well-sourced argument!

Our semen is the life, it is the reason why humans stay healthy, clear, smart, active and productive.

Huh? You do know that there are plenty of penis-less people who are just as “healthy, clear, smart, active and productive” as any of the supposedly enlightened dudes in your subreddit?

Still we are at the beginning of the Medical, Artificial Intelligence, Computer era,.

It’s been only around 40-50 years since the humans became familiar with the word COMPUTER.

There’s still a lot and hell of a lot that needs and will be discovered in the coming centuries.

Are you telling me that one day human scientists will develop some sort of cyborg sperm and take over the world? Or, wait, is a cyborg sperm writing this manifesto? To prepare us for the ultimate takeover?

And believe me one of the most important discovery on someday will be the real Elixir of the human body ‘The Semen’. How it is the most powerful, complex and miraculous.

If semen is so powerful an “elixir” won’t it make sense for penis-havers to fap out as much of the stuff as possible to sell to those who don’t have their own pair of balls?

And the history will take us as an example of how the generations in the 21st century used to fap and waste their semen which lead to the dysfunctionality of their brains.

Yeah, I’m pretty sure that humans knew about fapping long before the 21st century.

So guys , what happened till now it was a colossal mental disaster.

At least what has happened to produce this little manifesto here has been a mental disaster.

Let us make this day memorable , ‘THE RESURGENCE DAY’ . Write today’s date on a sheet of paper and preserve it .

I don’t think I’ll be doing that.

Let us take control of our minds from this moment.

We will be truthful to ourselves, we will not cheat on ourselves, we will not do ANYTHING that damages our body both physically and mentally.

I would humbly suggest that reading too many posts in the Semen Retention subreddit damages your, er, body mentally.

Let us show the world WHO WE ARE..!

NEVER FAP AGAIN, AT ANY COST.

Wait, we’re supposed to be paying to fap? Huh. I’m going to guess that most of us with penises may have a rather substantial overdue balance to pay.

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