It’s getting funky over in the Semen Retention subreddit. Not funky like James Brown funky. Funky as in musty teenager’s bedroom funky.
Today one Reddit semen-retainer reported that he had begun to emit a not-always pleasant odor. “I smell like semen,” wrote Nomorewitches. “[A]ll of the sudden get whiffs of the smell of semen especially when i sweat. could this be my pheromones?”
The mods of the subreddit quickly took down the post (which is still available via the Internet Archive), but not before a number of other faponauts had reported the same thing happening to them.
“Yeah around when I reach ten days or so [of not masturbating] I notice I have a weird scent,” wrote Fuckface400.
Nomorewitches declared that the whole thing was “weird lmao, and the female attraction crazy.”
“haha yeah,” agreed someone called eijeroand.
if yo good looking too, look around the class room, they stare, when youre not looking at them, you can see the thirst in their eyes so easily. Haha
You can see the thirst in their eyes.
Haha indeed.
One Semen Retainer suggested that it wasn’t any funky scent that was winning over the ladies, but rather something more spiritual. “I think this phenomenon occurs at a the source consciousness level we are all connected to,” wrote TruthSeeker_199.
[B]ecause [it] isn’t only women and goals attraction face to face. I’ve experienced girls that used to ignore me now are trying to go at me, texting, calling. Opportunities coming out of no where. It got a be some metaphisic component here.
Or maybe they’re trying to serve you with an order of protection?
One renegade commenter, challenging all these interpretations, suggested a simple cause for the semen scent phenomenon: unchecked wet dreams. Wrote should_: “It’s because you’re unloading over every inch of yourself when you sleep.”
As much as I hate to agree with anyone posting in the Semen Retention subreddit, I have to say he may have a point there.
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One renegade commenter, challenging all these interpretations, suggested a simple cause for the semen scent phenomenon: unchecked wet dreams. Wrote should_: “It’s because you’re unloading over every inch of yourself when you sleep.”
Are these guys anti-shower as well? This would not surprise, given the inadequate hygiene habits some manosphere members seem to not only espouse in their writings, but to view as their societal right.
I’m thinking at least one commenter is misreading revulsion from the ladies as “thirst”. Which misreading likewise would not surprise in the slightest.
I, as a trans man, certainly don’t mind that kind of scent…one of my ex-boyfriends, he wasn’t touching himself down there to save it up or something, and he smelt irresistible. I have no idea why. I loved the smell.
Maybe it means that they’re loaded with the stuff, and pheromones are signaling it?
Masturbate. Don’t masturbate. But, come on, do we really need these guys trying to attach some kind of weird significance to their choices?
Probably a good job these guys have no friends. That’d be an odd conversation to have:
“Do I smell odd?”
“You what?”
“I’ve stopped wanking. Do I smell weird now?”
I don’t think you can really have wet dreams without realising it. Waking up stuck to the sheets kind of gives it away.
The flowers of carob trees famously smell semen-y[*]. And yet, you don’t see women flocking to them with thirsty eyes. How peculiar. /s
[*] There are several such trees near where I live. Personally I find the smell more akin to a musty old rag, like if you left a wet dishrag or mop stuffed in a corner somewhere and forgot about it for a week. Not overwhelmingly pungent, just unpleasant. I guess I can see how it could remind someone of used underwear, maybe?
Just saying, when my ex-boyfriend held back on it, he suddenly smelt better (after some time, I used to hate his smell before), and I just loved it. Like I said, it’s possible pheromones are saying the dude is loaded, so maybe that’s why I experienced it?
My favorite thing about these guys is that whenever they do one of these “I’ve been retaining so long that my superpowers kicked in” it is always from like less than a week.
My dudes, that is NOT a long time. At all. Plenty of semen-having people routinely go longer, depending on their lifestyle, habits, and health, and they aren’t unintentionally sprouting superpowers.
If going “without” for a week made you a weird-smelling sexual magnet, it would be happening ALL THE TIME.
When I spent three weeks in the hospital back in 2019, I obviously “retained” for that whole period (and some time after I was discharged), and none of the young women aiding in my health care seemed suddenly drawn to me. The only fluid they wanted was my blood, every four hours.
@Penny Psmith, there’s also the linden tree:
https://youtu.be/aHze0SqB5Zg
Sure, cuz all the womenz love stale semen scent.
Or, y’know, the opposite.
The girls who are staring (if they aren’t imaginary) are probably doing it in horror, wondering why these guys don’t shower enough, and are either trying to figure out how to politely suggest application of hot water and soap, or memorizing the guy’s face to warn other women (and for the restraining order).
I guess you could actually test this.
We plug this experiment a lot for
propagandaeducational purposes. So you could use the same methodology.https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/16891352/
I’d want one of those hazmat suits before I collected the samples though.
I don’t know if this was intentional, but the way David italicized “You can see the thirst in their eyes” makes this sound like some sort of vampire story. The thirst…they’re coming closer…
@Alan – There’s also a study below that one about how garlic seems to improve body odor too! (Wonder if eating ginger would do anything like that without the bad breath effect.)
@ epitome of incomprehensibility
I like the one on how dog owners can identity their dogs by smell.
I can’t help but think they got things mixed up on the grant application; but then they got the money so they had to go with it.
And then there’s hawthorn blossom, with a distinctly animalic odor sometimes described as vulvar. (Robert Graves made that observation in The White Goddess, presumably referring to Crataegus laevigata; I can report the same of C. arborea and C. punctata in my part of Yankistan.)
Do these people not shower?
I’ve got a significant problem that I don’t know how to solve. I can’t seem to book my third vaccine dose.
I followed the same procedure I’d used (successfully) to book jabs 1 and 2. I got presented with the same endless parade of forms to fill out, at the end of which it accepted the final “submit” click without any error messages. But I never got the confirmation email with the date and time, unlike the first two times.
Today, I needed to pop into that Rexall to top up my supplies of Allegra and Pepcid, so while I was there I asked them to check their computer to see if my appointment was on record. It was not.
So, now the web forms for making an appointment are broken; and they fail silently, it seems, giving no immediate indication that anything is wrong.
The only procedure I know of for getting booked for a vaccine dose in my area no longer works.
What do I do?
(Of course, I asked the person at Rexall; they took down my name and number and promised to call me, but I’ve little faith as they seemed even more confused than I was.)
Wait and try again tomorrow? It could be that there are just too many people all trying to access the same online form, and you need to try hitting it at a less busy time.
Maybe take a good long nap and hit it first thing in the AM, or if you wake in the middle of the night?
Not in your system, but where I’m at demand for tests is bad enough that it’s taking over a week to get pcr results, there’s people who get to the urgent care after noon are told to come back tomorrow, and vaccine appointments are pretty much full up.
Alternatively, see if you can sign up in person at the vaccine location. Or sign up on your phone at in their lobby so you can show them the entire process?
Good luck.
If you stink so much that people are staring at you, it’s probably not lust in their eyes, dudes. It’s more “what is that nasty smell? Is it coming from him? Ugh”
These dudes (boys?) just want to imagine they start oozing some sexy male pheromone after a week’s abstention or so. Except they can’t imagine what such a pheromone would smell like, other than accumulated semen.
No, you don’t, unless you don’t wash yourself. What is it with you guys. Does not masturbating lead to lies.
I’m very ignorant on the science of pheromones but it’s one of those things (like the microbiome) which is talked about so unscientifically by people either trying to sell stuff or pretend they are love wizards that I always associate the word with complete hokum. Case in point, a teenage friend read that women fancy men who smell like their dad so – pre-renewed popularity of the brand – he started wearing Old Spice. Lol. Accidently ahead of the curve!
Well Queen Victoria wasn’t impressed with the smell.
https://youtu.be/aHze0SqB5Zg
Very off topic, but I hope people don’t mind if I post something that might be of benefit to UK mammotheers.
I know some people here struggle with debt; especially with all what’s happened during lockdown.
There is however a new government scheme that can give people a bit of breathing space if they’re being chased by creditors.
They’ve not exactly publicised it though. So I post the link below.
Basically you can apply for some official ‘breathing space’. That stops creditors taking any action, including contacting you, for 60 days. So you have a bit of time to get yourself sorted. It can also freeze payments and interest.
https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/debt-respite-scheme-breathing-space-guidance/debt-respite-scheme-breathing-space-guidance-for-creditors
There are two paths; a general one, and one specifically for people whose mental health has taken a bit of a battering.
I am waiting for the time when these fools make Brigadier General Jack D. Ripper their prophet.
“Women sense my power and they seek the life essence. I do not avoid women, Mandrake. But I do deny them my essence.”