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Ten dynamite last-minute costume ideas for a Men’s Rights Halloween

Men’s Rights Activists! Are you scrambling to find a good costume for a Halloween party tonight?

Here are a few suggestions, free of charge.

Let’s start with the ladies because in our gynocratic world ladies always get to go first.

Sexy Sperm Bandit: Wrap yourself in a sheet and carry a small vial of liquid soap.

Sexy False Rape Accuser: Just wear your regular clothes — you’ll want to take your victim by surprise.

Sexy Positive Pregnancy Test: Dress as a giant pregnancy test carrying a bag of sweet child support money.

Sexy Dinner Date Who Won’t Put Out: Wear an expensive lobster dinner as a hat. Just make sure to get a man to pay for it!

Sexy Cat Lady: Dress as a spinster with an apartment full of cats, because that’s all that feminism is going to get you in the end. I mean, who wants to be surrounded by all that terrifying cuteness?

For the men:

Sexy Sperm-Bandit-Foiler: Dress in your underwear and bring along a bottle of hot sauce which you can slyly pour into the Sperm Bandit’s sperm vial. If she tries to use the sperm to make a baby she’ll get a spicy surprise!

Sexy MGTOW cook: Tape a severely overcooked chicken breast to your chest and carry a package of frozen green beans. You’ll have the ladies salivating — but they can’t have you or your delicious dinner.

Sext Wall of Text: Dress up as a wall with something like this scrawled on it in crayons. Remember, the best punctuation is no punctuation!

Sexy Door-Holder: No special costume required. Just go around ostentatiously holding doors open for women — and calling them “bitches” when they don’t respond with a similarly ostentatious thank-you.

And last but not least:

Sexy Mammoth Hunter: Dress as a caveman and walk around fuming that the women of today don’t give you credit for hunting the mammoth or inventing fire or something else some caveman probably did. You’re welcome, ladies; you’re welcome!

If none of these ideas work for you, fellas, just dust off your favorite fedora and go dressed as yourself — then watch as the other party guests flee in terror from you and your terminally tedious complaints.

NOTE: I have swapped out the original graphic for this post because it contained a racist caricature which I didn’t see until it was pointed out to me. Sorry!

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Elaine The Witch
Elaine The Witch
1 month ago

I’m just going as shorter lady dimitrescu

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee
weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee
1 month ago

You could go as a sad, sad man desperate to be an alpha male who finally has your father’s approval.

https://twitter.com/weirwoodtreehug/status/1454604197991698433?s=20

gijoel
gijoel
1 month ago

You forgot feminist: Dye your hair blue and carry a copy of female eunuch. Wear baggy, unrevealing clothes or a fat suit.

Last edited 1 month ago by gijoel
.45
.45
1 month ago

Since we are still in Covid times and I don’t have friends or anywhere to go anyway, I’m going to bake some cookies or something with the little sister. They won’t even be Halloween themed. Bah humbug.

Lumipuna
Lumipuna
1 month ago

I’m just going as shorter lady dimitrescu

Lady Diminutrescu?

Gerry Sherry
Gerry Sherry
1 month ago
  • I’m going as a Frankenstein’s monster of liberty
    I have the green face paint the crown and the gown.
    Hello my mammothers long time reader first time poster. Glad to be here
  • Buttercup Q. Skullpants
    Buttercup Q. Skullpants
    1 month ago

    More MRA costume ideas: purple prose, word salad, sour grapes.

    epitome of incomrepehensibility

    Aw, I didn’t get the memo. I could have been a feminist harpy, like with wings and claws.

    But I did dress up as “colourless green ideas sleep furiously” for a Linguistics Student Association thing! No, I’m not a nerd, why do you ask 😛

    @Gerry Sherry – Welcome!

    GSS ex-noob
    GSS ex-noob
    1 month ago

    @Gerry Sherry: Hello! That’s a great costume idea.

    Full Metal Ox
    1 month ago

    @epitome of incomreprehensibility:

    But I did dress up as “colourless green ideas sleep furiously” for a Linguistics Student Association thing! No, I’m not a nerd, why do you ask 

    One of my all-time favorites was the dapper young man in an early twentieth-century suit and bowler, with a name tag reading ”GODOT”; the detail that Showed His Work was that he was carrying Starbucks cups labeled “VLADIMIR” and “ESTRAGON”.

    Dalillama
    1 month ago

    @Full Metal Ox
    Nah, the best Godot costume is to not show up, but periodically text the host that you’re on the way.

    Full Metal Ox
    1 month ago

    @Dalillama:

    Ah, but what if he’d arrived at the wrong party?