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misogyny nsfw sex succubi

Succubus troubles, again

There’s trouble in the astral realm. The trouble is that it’s filled with horny Reddit dudes astrally projecting themselves into the spirit realm in hopes of turning some friendly ghost into a friendly ghost with benefits — and getting a little freaked out when the being they’re astrallly schtupping turns out to be a succubus.

Let’s start with Jackisbacck, who seems to be trying to use the astral realm as a sort of mystical version of Tinder, that could ultimately bring real live girls to him in real life after they meet cute in the astral realm.

Last night I figured I’d give astral projection another try. I used binaural beats with earbuds. This time I got closer than ever … I focused and felt vibrations and saw light passing me.

And off he goes into the astral realm, which for some reason seems to look just like his room. In any case, he soon meets a new friend.

Then I got these random thoughts of someone saying hello to Me and it was a woman.

Whoa. Potential succubus alert!

She somehow told me her name is Serena. I’m not sure how it worked as this is all in my head like random thoughts popping up. (I don’t know anyone named Serena Nor do I think about that name, like, ever.) .

Did she look something like this?

She wanted me to come out of my body.

I bet she did. That’s how they get ya!

She tried to help me relax by touching my dick and was sort of giving me a reward system for reaching certain points. She stuck her mouth on my dick and

Hold on a minute big boy. Whatever happened to “what happens in the astral realm stays in the astral realm?”

Anyway, after some more naughty stuff — seriously, get a room, you two! — he and Serena almost get him out of his physical body.

Then I got closer to getting out of my body and I was able to pull my hands out but my chest and head and leg on my left side was stuck in my body still. I felt sort of sideways like half was out and half was in minus my head, as I still couldn’t see outside.

Can’t really help you with that, headless dude.

Then I felt like she got on my dick and was riding me and I didn’t nut or anything but it felt amazing .

Dude, this is Reddit you’re posting on, not Penthouse Letters.

Seriously. Anyway, after that she got off, probably because she knew I wasn’t able to go any further in and she disappeared for what felt like 10 minutes. I … felt the urge to tell her where I lived and how she could find me if she was in fact a human and not a spirit. I asked her several times throughout the time I was doing it if she was a human or a spirit but she wouldn’t tell me. She would just giggle sweetly if I asked. Idk it was weird.

Yeah, that’s probably because she’s 1) a succubus or 2) a figment of your imagination or 3) (most likely) a combination of the two.. Didn’t you do any reading about astral projecting before jumping right in?

Has anyone had a similar experience?

Sadly, yes, and they want us to know all about it. Consider the tale of Andromeda_5, another Redditor setting a course for the heart of the astral realm but somehow ending up in the astral version of a massage parlor. And now he finds himself addicted to astral love.

I achieved my first few astral projection during the first lockdown after years of trying. And I almost immediately went straight to astral sex, then got sent to an office all in white while some entity in white (spirit guide?) told me that it was disappointed in me, and I got sent back to my body lol. I woke up pretty ashamed of what I did.

Well, did you give her an astral orgasm, at least?

The last and most distinctive time I astral projected, I walked around my house a little before… I did the thing again. … I started thinking about incubus and succubus, and a literal demon thing came out of nowhere ( but I didn’t sense any negative/demonic energy).

Dude, listen to what you’re saying. It’s a demonic creature. Of course it has demonic energy.

Since then, I’ve had lots of sex-related lucid dreams, and I wake up annoyed now because it’s happening like 2 times a week. …

It’s annoying because it’s becoming an obstacle. I do want to project, even though I’m still a little scared about the loss of control, I want to meet my guides and do cool astral stuff.

Don’t we all.

But the astral sex/lucid dreaming happens so frequently now that I want control over it. I just lose myself in the moment completely and don’t think about anything else. What if the thing bonking me is a dangerous entity?

Now you’re asking the right questions.

I want to have control. I just had a nap and it happened again, I just want it to stop!

Obviously not all of you wants to stop. Sounds like you need to have The Talk, with yourself.

Meanwhile, there’s howdoyoudomate who seems oddly resistant to using the “S-word.”

Last night I woke up around 4am and then went back to sleep whilst I was trying to stay aware. I felt myself move downwards out of my body as I was laying on my front but all I could see was darkness and flashing lights.

Were you by chance sleeping on a pinball machine?

I felt something or someone kissing me and so reciprocated it back and I could feel their body, I just couldn’t see them. I remember feeling this tingly/electric sensation around my groin as I felt them pressed up against me. It got quite intense and then I got scared and I woke up in sleep paralysis

Dear Astral Penthouse, I never would have believed it could happen to me ….

I broke up with my girlfriend a while ago and haven’t been able to have sex in a while cause of lockdown in the uk so it’s been on my mind a lot. I guess as I was going to sleep I was thinking about it and then when I projected it happened

THAT’S HOW THEY GET YA!

Who would it have been that I was kissing? Or could it have been just created by my thoughts? I could literally feel their lips against mine and I could feel their body so it was quite a crazy experience so I feel it could’ve been a person or an entity of some sort

One word, howdoyoudo: SUCCUBUS.

Delactebles, thankfully a littel less verbose than some of his peers, recounts his adventures with what he calls an astral “thot.”

My experience was just a normal human female and she was very very attractive and cute and also nice and loveable which is my type of girl and she talked to me in a very very cute way and I’m like “ahh damn, who is this? Why is she so cute?” And she started seducing me and stuff and woke up drained and exhausted and I didn’t know what a succubus is!😂 I regained strength in just 5 weeks

Five weeks? FIVE WEEKS!? You’ve definitely got a succubus or perhaps astral mono.

Burkiooo had a somewhat different reaction to the possibility he was schtupping a succubus.

So recently this the second time this has happened. I was sleeping and kept going they sleep paralysis and going back to sleep because I felt so tired. The last time I drift off I remember waking up what seemed like my room but I could very much tell it wasn’t then I was on top of a woman that look liked and felt like a woman I had slept with before but her shoulders were weird looking.

Did they have giant bat wings attached to them?

I remember being on top of her, my face next to her hair and I couldn’t see her face and didn’t bother to but proceeded to have intercourse and then Ik something was off, this was not a regular wet dream.

The wet-dream connoisseur has logged on.

As soon as the intercourse began it felt different then she said,” Do it again” in the softest moan. She had her arms wrapped around me.

Once again this is turning into Penthouse Letters.

So I said I rebuke you in the name of Jesus and her ass kind of screamed and bit my neck and I woke up.

Directed by M. Night Shyamalan.

Seriously, I did not see that coming, and apparently neither did the succubus. I’d get that bite looked into, though.

By the way, here’s my favorite song about succubi:

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Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
3 months ago

Succubus troubles? Again?

Don’t you hate that.

Last edited 3 months ago by Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
Tabby Lavalamp
Tabby Lavalamp
3 months ago

So I said I rebuke you in the name of Jesus and her ass kind of screamed and bit my neck and I woke up.

Sphincter dentata?

Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
3 months ago

I couldn’t see her face and didn’t bother to but proceeded to have intercourse. . . . As soon as the intercourse began it felt different then she said,” Do it again” in the softest moan. . . . So I said I rebuke you in the name of Jesus

So you rebuked her after you had an orgasm. Got it.

Big Titty Demon
Big Titty Demon
3 months ago

@Kat

Succubus troubles? Again?

Don’t you hate that.

The big titty demons do be like that. What can you do. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

@Tabby Lavalamp

I didn’t originally read it the literal way but now I can’t read it any other way, giggling madly.

BradMoonRising
BradMoonRising
3 months ago

So I said I rebuke you in the name of Jesus and her ass kind of screamed and bit my neck and I woke up.

Taken out of context, ^^this is the funniest shit I’ve read in a long time.

Ohlmann
Ohlmann
3 months ago

My prefered succubus is a librarian. Which is just fine by me.

(okay, she’s not explicitely said to be a succubus, just as a little demon. But she have all the classic attribute, apart from being conservatively dressed)

SomeGuyInAWaistcoat
SomeGuyInAWaistcoat
3 months ago

Sphincter dentata

I’m both relieved and dismayed I’m not the only person whose mind went to that horrifying image.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
3 months ago

And I almost immediately went straight to astral sex, then got sent to an office all in white while some entity in white (spirit guide?) told me that it was disappointed in me

And then he got Astral Detention, and the incident went on his permanent record.

Alan Robertshaw
3 months ago

Blooming hummer, X-Mal Deutschland. That’s bringing back a few memories.
I feel like I should be in Leeds Warehouse drinking purple nasties.

Victorious Parasol
Victorious Parasol
3 months ago

I’m reminded that James Randi referred to such encounters as “half-astral trips.”

Ohlmann
Ohlmann
3 months ago

Which lead to the question, is there an astral horny jail ?

Threp (formerly Shadowplay)
Threp (formerly Shadowplay)
3 months ago

Which lead to the question, is there an astral horny jail ?

Ghoulcatraz.

(Devil’s Island were too low hanging to be picked. 😛 )

Last edited 3 months ago by Threp (formerly Shadowplay)
Full Metal Ox
3 months ago

As soon as the intercourse began it felt different then she said,” Do it again” in the softest moan.

”Do it again! Do it again! Turn around and gooo back!”

From a song considerably pre-dating Li’l Nas X, involving a diabolic encounter of the horny kind:

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cVw9VkYyTFk

mouse sparrow
mouse sparrow
3 months ago

I prefer the band called Incubus.

moregeekthan
moregeekthan
3 months ago

I remember reading somewhere that young (20-something) men who were experiencing social isolation were particularly susceptible to sleep paralysis. If that’s true, we would expect to see an uptick of that during the pandemic, with a resulting uptick in men making odd and/or creepy posts about it on Reddit.

Viscaria
Viscaria
3 months ago

All I’m really getting from this is that these men’s dreams make a lot more sense than any of my dreams. For me, it would be like, “so then I kissed the succubus, and then I was the succubus, and then I was a Ghostbuster, and then my dad was disappointed in me for the state of my apartment.”

Elaine The Witch
Elaine The Witch
3 months ago

Dude, I have dreams of a vampire fucking me every now and then. That doesn’t mean I think a vampire was actually fucking me. Get some sleep or something.

Sheila Crosby
Sheila Crosby
3 months ago

I … felt the urge to tell her where I lived and how she could find me if she was in fact a human and not a spirit. I asked her several times throughout the time I was doing it if she was a human or a spirit but she wouldn’t tell me. She would just giggle sweetly if I asked. Idk it was weird.

Maybe you don’t get pregnant through astral sex? That would be a major advantage.

@Viscaria

“so then I kissed the succubus, and then I was the succubus, and then I was a Ghostbuster, and then my dad was disappointed in me for the state of my apartment.”

Mine are more: “So then I kissed the inccubus, and he turned into a cute little octopus and we were on top of a ferris wheel so we flew off into the tree tops which turned ino broccoli which turned carivorous. So I telled, “Donald Trump is coming” and the carnivorous broccoli died and I was washed away by a tsumani, and…”

Threp (formerly Shadowplay)
Threp (formerly Shadowplay)
3 months ago

I want to know how the hell you all manage to dream? I rarely do (and when it happens it isn’t at all pleasant).

Moggie
Moggie
3 months ago

Didn’t these guys ever watch Scooby-Doo? The spook is invariably a gross old dude in disguise.

Dalillama
3 months ago

@Threp
Same, but in my case the times it occurs are mostly so mundane I have to check sometimes to make sure it didn’t happen.

Crip Dyke
3 months ago

Talk about mind blown:

she was very very attractive and cute and also nice and loveable which is my type of girl

Usually when a human being encounters another human being who is “attractive and cute and nice and lovable” that’s never going to be someone’s type. How did this even happen?

gijoel
gijoel
3 months ago

This is the worst Dr Strange fanfic ever.

GSS ex-noob
GSS ex-noob
3 months ago

Her ass screamed and bit his neck? I didn’t think even succubi did that. Maybe he’s discovered a new figment of the imagination.

I’ve never had a dream, sexay or otherwise, that proceeded so logically, as if I was making up a story to tell someone… Oh. Yeah.

“I regained strength in 5 weeks.” Dude, consider a Covid test, you might have had a mild case. Would explain the weird dream and lengthy weakness.

Moggie
Moggie
3 months ago

I think you’re misinterpreting the “her ass bit my neck” part. He’s clearly referring to a donkey, who grew tired of his shit. Donkey bites are rare in our realm, but that doesn’t apply to the astral plane.

Alan Robertshaw
3 months ago

@ moggie

Donkey bites are rare in our realm, but that doesn’t apply to the astral plane.

Ah, but what about the ass-tral plane!

(I met some nice donkeys yesterday)

https://www.facebook.com/alan.robertshaw.9/videos/10158194954595936

TB Tabby
TB Tabby
3 months ago

Yeah, I go to the astral realm all the time. The difference is, I understand that it’s more commonly known as my imagination. If these guys are actually meeting succubi, I’m actually running a lucrative business telling size-changing potions to cute furry women.

Elaine The Witch
Elaine The Witch
3 months ago

@Moggie

That was actually a big plot twist at the end of scooby doo 2 monster unleash. Ned the camerman was fucking heather jasper and heather jasper turned out to be Jonathan Jacobo

Ohlmann
Ohlmann
3 months ago

@threp : usually, people that say they don’t dream just forget them faster than usual. Albeit not dreaming at all seem to exist as a condition (with sleep monitoring showing no trace of the phase where dream normally happen).

Theses days I have nightmare, except I can’t remember why I am so filled with dread. Like one was a dream where I had a roommate, and bolted awake when he came back home. Absolutely no idea of why exactly that made me awake, and I couldn’t sleep for almost an hour because I was so shaken.

Usually my dreams are rather more random than that. One of the one I remember best involved a maya priestess changing into a giant were-platypus who then launched cars at me.

Lumipuna
Lumipuna
3 months ago

I hate those anxiety dreams where my incu bus is running late and I’m about to miss my connection with the succu bus.

epitome of incomrepehensibility

@Lumipuma – huh, I was thinking of a similar pun last night. We must’ve gotten astral memos from the same spiritual realm. 🙂

I’ve had a few pretty scary nightmares, and plenty of boring dreams, but in general they tend to be funny.

A friend who has similarly goofy dreams (but also much more vivid ones, it seems) started some “Things Learned from Dreams” pages on the writing website we frequent; one of mine is “I need to add Galileo to the email contact list at work” (but of course).

Tovius
3 months ago

I keep having dreams where I’m at a large social gathering where no one is wearing masks, and panicking when I remember that they should be.

GSS ex-noob
GSS ex-noob
3 months ago

@Tovius: I’ve had that dream several times the past year myself.

Mostly_Lurking
Mostly_Lurking
3 months ago

Came here to make an ass joke, butt you all beat me to it.

@Tovius, wow, I thought I was the only one having dreams like that, except I’m the one freaking out when I realize I’m in public not wearing a mask. In one of the first ones I had, I even got scolded by an old lady for it, but nobody else in those dreams is ever wearing one.

They happened more frequently last March, but I’ve had a couple more recently. The thing is, I’ve spent this whole time indoors because I can’t wear a mask due to minor health issues. I need to go get vaxed soon.

Gerald Fnord
Gerald Fnord
3 months ago

I wonder if he knows that traditionally, in the West at least, succubi and incubi are supposed to be the same beings, this being established by the Church as a way that they can get (but not beget) children on women. (Satan cannot create, and neither can the fallen angels his demons, but a succubus can grab semen from a man and get it into a woman after switching into an incubus.)