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incels misogyny rape culture sexual inequality

Incel: “Sluts not pleasuring me is discrimination”

Spock is not impressed with your logic

The incels have come up with yet another reason why their lack of sex is somehow the responsibility of someone else — in this case, “sluts” who fuck other guys but not them.

Because, I guess, any woman who consents to sex with one man has somehow given her consent to all other men, even the weirdos who hang out on the Incels.is forums. So not having sex with these guys is a form of discrimination.

“Local SLUTS” I guess the ball is in your court.

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Dalillama
1 month ago

Speaking as an autistic slut who knows many othe autistic sluts, tge problem is that you’re an asshole, not that you’re autistic.

personalpest
personalpest
1 month ago

As another autist, let me co-sign with Dalillama. This clown is just using his condition as an excuse.

francis
francis
1 month ago

as a slut who has been with many autistic men its not your autism thats the problem uts your attitude

Ninja Socialist
Ninja Socialist
1 month ago

I’m assuming that to him a slut is any woman who has any sex at all. Not “pleasuring” him isn’t discrimination, it just means we don’t want to sleep with just any man, especially a man who calls us sluts. He’s just pissed that women have the choice of who we want to sleep with.

Snowberry
Snowberry
1 month ago

As a non-autistic slut, I did try sleeping with 3 incel-ish young men a couple decades before the term “incel” became a thing, while being dubious that this would actually fix them, despite their insistence that it would do so. It turns out that having a temporary mood elevation while under the influence of self-destructive ideation actually makes things worse, not better. I don’t do that anymore.

occasional reader
occasional reader
1 month ago

(Side note : side notes in brackets (SNIB™, patent pending) are now considered as The Truth)
Indeed. Who need proof when you can have snib ? No need of thesis and articles in science, just write your theory as a snib to make it true.

North Sea Sparkly Dragon
North Sea Sparkly Dragon
1 month ago

As another autist with many autistic people for friends, at least two of whom I’d happily do wicked, wicked things to, it’s not the being autistic people object to, it’s the vile, entitled attitude.

Robert Haynie
Robert Haynie
1 month ago

As someone who is neither autistic nor a slut, I can only add that this argument is less than… coherent. Or properly an argument. And I’m fairly certain that his professed autistic status has anything to do with the lack of coherence.

It might help is he actually defined the term “slut”, but I suspect that his definition is “everyone who refuses to sleep with me”.

Mog
Mog
1 month ago

Haha, you silly commentators! Women can’t be autistic! Human variances, challenges and backstories are reserved for men (well at least men that look like BrettyBoy), women are just dumb-terminals for the sex-denying hivemind.

Next you’ll be saying you have a rich interior life life that doesn’t involve providing or denying sex to incels at all, LOL.

Ohlmann
Ohlmann
1 month ago

I hate the weaponization of autism.

There’s a reason for which we suspect but aren’t quite sure that so many scientists might be autistic.

Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
1 month ago

Yeah, a friend told me once that a guy had tried this trick on her. You slept with him, so why not sleep with me? Kind of like his mom was handing out cookies to all her children, but he got none. And he deserved one! It’s so unfair!

Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
1 month ago

Online INCELS not refraining from BS is a violation of my human rights.

Moggie
Moggie
1 month ago

Are men fungible?

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
1 month ago

And this is why rape victims’ sexual histories get so thoroughly questioned, despite having nothing to do with the present day crime. It’s assumed that once a woman consents to sex with one man, she consents to sex with all men, forever.

I’m willing to bet this guy ignores (if not actively insults) “land whales” and women over 25, so how about we arrest him first? After all, under his own law he’s showing preferential treatment and discrimination.

Crip Dyke
1 month ago

“Arrested for discrimination”

LOL. That’s not how the law works, my dude.

Colschick
Colschick
1 month ago

Discrimination doesn’t have to be a negative. Otherwise these guys would be forced to have sex with every fatty, uggo or looksmatch they came into contact with.

MexicanHotChocolate
MexicanHotChocolate
1 month ago

As the uncle of an autistic child, I find it disturbing the way this asshole has weaponized his autism. And to reiterate what others have said: it’s not your autism that keeps woman away from you; it’s that you’re an asshole.

SadOldGuy
SadOldGuy
1 month ago

Isn’t this the (TV) trope: “Sleeps with everyone but you”?

Masse_Mysteria
Masse_Mysteria
1 month ago

Can anyone explain why it’s just local sluts?

It kind of sounds like sluts further afield would be interested him, but are just too far. I suspect that’s not the case, because then he could just go there. Maybe it’s just local in the sense that wherever he is, sluts want none of him.

MondayMiddlemarch
MondayMiddlemarch
1 month ago

Dear Autistic Incel:

  1. Define ‘slut’. How many previous sexual partners does a slut make? 100? 20? 5? 1? How much should I bet that ‘slut’ is just a synonym for ‘woman’?
  2. What does sex mean to you? Is it a transactional relationship in which you, the man, receive ‘pleasure’ from whatever ‘slut’ is in your general vicinity at any given time? OR is sex a loving expression of desire, passion and love between two people who have established a mutual romantic connection?
  3. You have autism. So the FUCK what!? Autistic or Not Autistic, you are not entitled to access of another human being’s body (genitals included) for your pleasure based on nothing but your existence in their personal space and your assumption that they are a ‘slut’.
  4. No one gets arrested for failing to give sex to some one, discriminatory or not. Each human being has bodily autonomy and is not obligated by law to perform sex acts on another because that person is ‘neuro atypical’.
  5. Get help. Seriously, you need help before you take your incel mindset offline and into a real life situation that might hurt somebody, probably you.
Cyborgette
Cyborgette
1 month ago

Uh yeah as yet another woman with autism, I also find the weaponization of autism horrifying. Especially having gone through one of MA’s ableist private schools for auties – an experience I still sometimes have nightmares about, two decades later.

I’ve opined before that the trans community could use an equivalent concept for the Jewish “shande fur die goyim”… Feels like the autistic community could as well.

JJJ
JJJ
1 month ago

the phrase “she wont let me fuck her” is as Oedipus-ish as you get. OP needs to check this ASAP

Cyborgette
Cyborgette
1 month ago

Re: slut. This is kinda OT, but…

I’ve never particularly liked that word for myself. And I respect efforts to reclaim it, but I really don’t like how often in queer spaces I’ve had it applied to me without consent. Or similar reclaimed misogynistic language, e.g. “hot mess”.

You get to reclaim it for yourself. You don’t get to reclaim it for me. Don’t call me that if I don’t say you can, even implicitly.

Threp (formerly Shadowplay)
Threp (formerly Shadowplay)
1 month ago

TIL that semantic satiation is nowhere near as pleasant as it sounds.

@Cyborgette

I detest the word. Yeah, reclaiming is noble and all, but I keep expecting Nan to whack me in the ear every time I read it. 😀

Last edited 1 month ago by Threp (formerly Shadowplay)
Crip Dyke
1 month ago

Re: slut. This is kinda OT, but…

I’ve never particularly liked that word for myself. And I respect efforts to reclaim it, 

I have reclaimed the word “floozy”. I find it much more attractive than “slut”

Separately: with respect to people nonconsensually applying the word slut to you, I obviously agree that is completely not OK.

GSS ex-noob
GSS ex-noob
1 month ago

Local sluts apparently have some taste.

Also, this asshole would be an asshole no matter how his brain is wired.

Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
1 month ago

Re: slut. This is kinda OT, but…

I’ve never particularly liked that word for myself. And I respect efforts to reclaim it,

 

I have reclaimed the word “floozy”. I find it much more attractive than “slut”

Separately: with respect to people nonconsensually applying the word slut to you, I obviously agree that is completely not OK.

I vividly recall how, in 8th grade, our teacher told one girl to take the gum out of her mouth because she “looked like a streetwalker.” I gasped. Nobody else seemed to turn a hair.

Cyborgette
Cyborgette
1 month ago

@Crip Dyke

I mean “floozy” sounds less like an insult somehow, but it’s still… IDK. Not for me. I’m very careful these days about who I give access to my body, and while there’s nothing wrong with not being so, I resent that people make assumptions about me because I used to be less careful. And because I’m bi, trans, prefer revealing clothes for dysphoria reasons etc.

(Also just to be clear I don’t see you doing any of those things, just… the way “sex positivity” has worked in practice in the queer spaces I’ve run in has often been really exhausting.)

Crip Dyke
1 month ago

@cyborgette

the way “sex positivity” has worked in practice in the queer spaces I’ve run in has often been really exhausting.

Absolutely true. I mean, you’re talking about your spaces, but I’ve seen it many spaces myself. Part of why I like floozy is that it’s
1) too silly to take entirely seriously,
and
2) one of the few words I can use that hasn’t been overtly weaponized in my lifetime…and those words are few when you’re talking about vocabulary related to sexual activities /habits /tendencyies.

Cyborgette
Cyborgette
1 month ago

@Crip Dyke

Yeah that’s super valid. If it works, it works.

And I’m glad you understand re “sex positivity” and queer spaces issues, gods, it’s been hard to bring that stuff up a lot of times without being seen as a buzzkill or even a bigot.

Snowberry
Snowberry
1 month ago

Eh, my attitude towards the “s”-word (no, not that one, the one we’re currently talking about) is that if it comes up in conversation, I’m all like “Well I am one, and so what?” But I don’t put it in my bio or call other people that. Well, there have been a few times where I’ve used the term in a general sense rather than a reference to myself or a specific other person, but only as a conversational convenience.

Honestly I prefer the term “chilk”, which I made up, because it sounds funny. But no one would know what I was talking about. (UrbanDictionary says it’s short for “chocolate milk”, but it’s not taken from that.)

Sheila Crosby
Sheila Crosby
1 month ago

I decided a long time ago that what “slut” really means is “woman I can’t control.”

rabid rabbit
rabid rabbit
1 month ago

@Sheila Crosby

Well, it originally meant “Untidy woman,” and sometimes “a kitchen maid, a drudge,” with a distinct sense of “Woman who doesn’t clean the house properly,” so you may be on to something there. In the case of the OP, maybe not so much “Woman I can’t control” as “Woman who doesn’t arrange the world to be exactly the way I want it to be.” (Source: https://www.etymonline.com/search?q=slut)

GSS ex-noob
GSS ex-noob
1 month ago

@Kat: I’d have gasped too. When caught chewing gum, my teachers merely pointed out it wasn’t allowed in class. Even the super misogynist dude only went so far as to say someone looked like a cow chewing its cud.

“Floozy” is such a silly-sounding word that it can work better. Especially if you throw in other old-timey words. Malarkey! Tomfoolery! Gallivanting! 23 skidoo!

Kevin
Kevin
1 month ago

@MondayMiddlemarch incels will never willingy go to therapy because their very mindset makes it useless. After all if that guy is legit diagnosed it means hes already in contact with the mental health system. The kind of “therapy” incels need would proably be a combination of rehab programms for sex offenders and exit couselling for radical right-wing extremists, jihadists, and cult members.
Unfortunately the US is too busy jailing poor brown people and doesnt care about mental health structures, but maybe Canada can try?
Also, as much as I would like to say that autism has nothing to do with being an incel, I can see how the symptoms can make autistic men predisposed to become incels. Spectrum news had a good take on it.

Ohlmann
Ohlmann
1 month ago

@kevin : I am wary of saying that autism can lead to be some shade of asshole. If only because by proportion, there don’t seem to be more asshole among autists than other people.

Full Metal Ox
1 month ago

@Sheila Crosby; @rabid rabbit:

Well, it originally meant “Untidy woman,” and sometimes “a kitchen maid, a drudge,” with a distinct sense of “Woman who doesn’t clean the house properly,” so you may be on to something there. In the case of the OP, maybe not so much “Woman I can’t control” as “Woman who doesn’t arrange the world to be exactly the way I want it to be.” (Source: https://www.etymonline.com/search?q=slut)

According to Robert Herrick (of “Gather ye rosebuds while ye may” fame), you need to be a tidy housekeeper to gain favor with Queen Mab; the fairies apparently don’t care about your sexual history:

THE FAIRIES
by Robert Herrick


IF ye will with Mab find grace,
Set each platter in his place ;
Rake the fire up, and get
Water in, ere sun be set.
Wash your pails and cleanse your dairies ;
Sluts are loathsome to the fairies ;
Sweep your house, who doth not so,
Mab will pinch her by the toe.

Kevin
Kevin
1 month ago

@Ohlmann Yes autism and assholeness are orthogonal, but the combination of both could be what leads some to become incels. Without any serious studies it’s just specularion but anecdotal evidence should prompt psychologists to study the topic. Here’s the article I mentioned before https://www.spectrumnews.org/features/deep-dive/radical-online-communities-and-their-toxic-allure-for-autistic-men/

Alan Robertshaw
1 month ago

@ kevin

For at least 6 of the 75 individuals, she found an autism diagnosis or at least a strong suggestion of autism

I’m no statistician, but that doesn’t seem even slightly significant.

Again, I don’t know the actual figures, but I would have guessed that in any random selection of 75 men that it would have been more than 6 on the spectrum.

If anything that seems to suggest people with autism are under-represented in such offences.

But I’ll defer to anyone with more knowledge of the actual figures of course.

Bookworm in hijab
Bookworm in hijab
1 month ago

Kevin, I am seriously side-eyeing your comment.