During the Obama administration — if you can remember that far back — the right-wing press got pretty good at generating controversies out of nothing — collectively clutching their pearls when, say, Obama allegedly dishonored the White House by wearing a tan suit. And them there was the time he ordered spicy mustard for his hamburger, like some kind of fancy-pants snob.
With another Democrat in the White House, you might expect the right-wing press to be pulling phony controversies out of thin air on a regular basis. And, to be fair, they’ve been trying to. But they’re clearly out of practice and so most of their recent attempts have failed big time.
Last week, they tried to get the crowd worked up over Biden’s plan to restrict the average American’s consumption of red meat to only 4 pounds a year — only to discover that Biden had no such plan; they’d been had by a British tabloid’s misleading story.
The right-wing press also tried to get Americans up in arms about the government allegedly sending copies of a kids’ book by Kamela Harris to children stuck in our border camps. Never mind that the govcernment never did any such thing; it turns out that some random person had donated one copy of the book to the kids in a humanitarian drive.
Now the right-wingers are trying to generate some sort of controversy over a strange but utterly insignificant gesture on Joe BIden’s part. Last Thursday, while walking to the Marine One helicopter on the White House laws, Biden spied a dandelion in its seedy phase, then picked it and gave it to his wife.
Now, I don’t know why he picked a weed to give to Jill. It’s a somewhat strange thing to do. But hey, at least the two of them actually seem to enjoy one another’s presence — in stark contrast to the previous First Couple. I doubt Trump would even bother to pick up a wad of dirt to give to Melania.
Is there any logic to Biden’s gesture? Mediaite points out that
[t]here is a folk belief that blowing on a dandelion can grant wishes, but there is little scientific evidence to back this up.
So maybe Biden was trying, in a not-altogether-serious manner, to wish Jill good luck. Or perhaps there was some other private joke between the two of them. Who knows, and more to the point, who cares?
Well, one person who cares is Newsmax host Grant Stinchfield, who had a bit of a tantrum after seeing the footage, declaring
Joe Biden today getting on Marine One and he stops and picks up, I think it’s a dandelion, but it’s a dandelion that hasn’t even blossomed into a flower yet, like that gives everybody asthma. So you blow it, it goes everywhere, and everybody starts sneezing.
Well he picks up the weed and gives it to Jill, that’s, what, I guess is supposed to be some kind of a sweet gesture. … I say it was a planted dandelion there, who knows?
Is he really suggesting that someone literally planted the dandelion there on the White House lawn so that Biden could see it, pick it, give it to Jill, and then reap sweet praises in the press for such an, er, romantic gesture? Maybe.
But he’s definitely not the only right-wing personality who thought something weird and devious was going on. On Fox News, Mediaite reports,
Laura Ingraham and Fox News contributor Raymond Arroyo spent several minutes mocking Biden, snarking that the president had given his wife a “weed” (a common theme among critics), comparing him to Frankenstein’s monster, and decrying the positive coverage that the gesture received.
“It was a sweet gesture, Laura, even if it was a weed, maybe the poor man didn’t know ,” Arroyo said, then joked “Look, at least you didn’t try to pick a lemon off of Jill’s dress, so this is a good thing.”
Fox News host Tammy Bruce, meanwhile, was moved to incoherence by Biden’s little gesture, complaining that the dandelion-picking moment
made the news. That was like the news. This is what we’re dealing with.
[mocking voice] He romantically gave his wife a dandelion.
It’s as though they want us to go into a coma, or do they believe we are infants and we can’t, we don’t know what’s going on, and look, I think it’s nice that when a man picks up a flower in some fashion and gives it to his wife, but he’s the president of the United states, it’s not the news,
We’ve got Covid, we’ve got a border that’s open, we’ve got big enemies looking at us and trying to figure out how to destroy us, and this is the news?
This would be a searing indictment of the triviality of so much political news coverage in the mainstream press — except that the only people talking about it are on Fox News, Newsmax, and, oh, did I forget LewRockwell.com?
“Have You Ever Given or Received a Bouquet of Dandelion Weeds?,” asked writer Thomas DiLorenzo.
I’ve never heard of it; have never seen dandelion “flowers” for sale at any florist or at the section of the grocery store where they sell flowers, or anywhere else. I tried to buy some on Flowers.com but with no success. That’s because it’s kind of like giving someone a bouquet of poison ivy or sneeze-inducing ragweed. It’s cute when a five-year-old child picks a “bouquet” of dandelion weeds for his mom, but creepy and demented when an 80 year-old-man does it. Especially if he’s the man who has his finger on the nuclear button.
But the media are portraying Senile Joe’s asinine picking of a dandelion weed for his wife as some kind of Romeo-and-Juliet moment. Dumb-Ass Americanus is said to be “swooning” all over twitter over it. Jill Biden has that “what an asshole” look on her face in the photos of the event on the internet.
Again, the only people paying attention to the dandelion moment are the right-wingers.
And even they are having trouble caring about it. I looked through Pariots.win — the Reddit-like discussion forum that emerged from the now-banned The_Donald subreddit — to see if I could find anyone reacting to the dreaded dandelion thing. I found only a handful of commenters with anything to say.
There was someone called Crucial8GB who declared
Biden has Dementia. The Democrat Party should be charged with elderly abuse.
There was Tobyrocky accusing the Dems of something like child abuse:
Typical mind of a 5 year old. They give their mom’s dandelions too.
And then there was orrvarpen, who spouted this bit of nonsense that I’m not going to even try to decipher.
Looks like a white rubber duck. And sleepy Joe has gotten gills, did he fall into the deep and cold water of well force one again?
I don’t think “Dandelion-picking Joe” is going to supplant “Sleepy Joe” as a term of opprobrium on the right. But it’s not for lack of trying.
We should expect the next phony controversy to pop up within a few days now. Let’s hope it suffers the same fate as “Joe BIden Picks a Dandelion.”
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Does anyone else find the use of the word ‘planted’ in reference to a plant utterly hilarious?
@ full metal ox
“Are you sure this will work?”
“Yeah. Once we’re inside the White House, you go grab the nuclear codes. Then we show that cat why not to mess with us.”
Also….
@Annoying Jackass
Did you miss the part where I don’t care? Shut up and go away already.
More praise for the humble dandelion:
http://twitter.com/ReziaWahidWeave/status/1389578974817394691
@Big Titty Demon:
Ahhhh, Redwall. You could certainly tell that Brian Jacques was something of a ‘foodie’. Just don’t read too many in short order, because they do get repetitive.
“It’s not a weed but a a perennial herb”
*sniggers in university botany minor*
@Jenora Feuer:
@Big Titty Demon:
Ahhhh, Redwall. You could certainly tell that Brian Jacques was something of a ‘foodie’. Just don’t read too many in short order, because they do get repetitive.
I suspect Redwall of having been the inspiration of an infamous passage in The Spirit Morph Saga, a YA novel series roughly equivalent to His Dark Materials in Steven Universe; apparently the description of Lisa and Archimicarus’ wedding cake ran for fifty pages. I can actually imagine a Watsonian reason: perhaps the cake was decorated with a pictorial recap of Lisa and Archimicarus’s adventures?
I really liked Redwall as a kid, though repetitive is… not an inaccurate description. (And looking back there is the somewhat racist reading on how most species tend to follow certain stereotypes, with any deviations being conspicuous and noteworthy.)
I think my favorite was Marlfox. Mostly because I was getting tired of every bad guy being a craven coward whenever challenged and although they didn’t always cover themselves in glory, I felt the Marlfoxes put in a better showing than many other Redwall villains.
I remember a courtyard fight scene where one of the Foxes was cornered, and rather than cower in fear, he went right at his opposing number like the hardened warrior he was supposed to be.
@Alan! You have measurably improved my day. That picture is so cute I cannot look, yet I can’t look away. It got a smile out of my husband, too, sans context, because it needs none.
The mouse pictures are insufferably cute.
@Jenora
I tried about ten years ago to read my favorite set, which was Mariel of Redwall/Bellflower (A girl mouse! The best!), and I could not make it through. I should try again at some point because I remember trying to make the Dibbun barrel boat and all sorts of inspiration from those books. They were the height of literature when I was like 6 years old, but totally not readable later. I’m more patient now, though, so I should give it another shot for the memories.
Trifle not being a thing where I grew up, I was very excited to have a trifle for the first time this year though. It did live up to the hype from Redwall. 😀
My father defined a weed as “any plant growing where you don’t want it to.” He was a botanist, so he should know. The right wing press seem to define it as “Anything you didn’t pay for,” because money means a great deal to them.
I’m sure the tRumps would have given each other triffids.
re: allowing wild plants and “weeds” grow – My maternal grandfather farmed 20 acres in Iowa and the land he picked to buy had three acres of virgin prairie along the road front, which he saw as a huge boon. Once we inherited it in 1999, my aunt and I kept that acreage out of the farm auction and donated it to the county. There’s a plaque there now.
My mom used to tell me that whenever they had a cow with mastitis, he would take the calf off of her and turn her out on to that three acres for a few days so she could eat native medicinal plants. It worked at least 75% of the time; if it didn’t the cow was put out of her misery. Old German farmers in the 1930s never called the vet (or so I was told.)
Hambeast, that’s so cool! I wonder what specific plants were helpful?
Regarding the Redwall series, I never read it, but my sister did, and she set some of the poems/songs in them to tunes she made up, and sang them on hikes.
@Alan,
There’s also a movement in America to actively restore as much of the lost prairie lands as is feasible. In some cases reintroducing it alongside interstate roadways and at some interstate on/off ramp areas to both reduce the need to mow those areas over the summer and to have something prettier than regular grass to look at, at least once it gets established anyway.
https://www.americanprairie.org/
I don’t immediately recall if I ever posted a link about this here or not, but there’s also a movement among some naturalists here to do Pleistocene rewilding. The theory here is that North America’s ecosystem has been severely broken since roughly the time the first humans crossed the Bering Straight. The idea is to bring in the still-living cousins of the extinct animals to replace the ones lost and restore the ecosystem that way, though with some accommodations in certain cases. Like making sure any elephants brought in to replace the extinct mastodons have an indoor shelter to wait the winters out in. Stuff like that.
Here’s a local’s view on what some of the pros and cons of that might be for the West:
https://www.hcn.org/blogs/range/rants-from-the-hill-pleistocene-rewilding
As for what plants are considered weeds, and by whom, the local Department of Natural Resources considers daffodils as a weed, when they show up in the wild. Apparently they have been known to drive out local plant species that have more of a right to be there than the flowers do.
And for my contributions about dandelions, I’ve never quite understood why they’re so hated at times. They, alongside violets and beebalm (? I think that’s the name for a bumblebee flower) make a spring lawn look pretty. At least until the lawnmowers come through….
Also, am I the only who who’s ever noticed the ability of dandelions to ‘duck’ when a lawnmower goes over them, then pop back up hours after the mower is gone to spread seeds all over the place? Seriously, there’s been a few times I’ve noticed a freshly mown lawn that suddenly had a few stray dandelions just pop up like the mower blades just didn’t touch them at all. It’s weird.
Regarding milkweed being poisonous: Guess why Monarch butterflies are bright orange, and Viceroy butterflies mimic Monarchs
Because I like mice, and because I can: have some more harvest mice.
This one’s availing herself of another wildflower with military symbolism; I wonder if they seek out poppy seeds for the narcotic properties?
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Mere wild roses might be a bit déclassé, but this satisfied diner, if they make it to autumn, will be coming back for the fruit:
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(Which now cues an earworm: I’ve been given to understand that on the right side of the pond, “Where the Wild Roses Grow”, as a lavishly-orchestrated old-timey waltz, is a popular wedding reception song among people who evidently don’t realize that the plot is Boy Meets Girl; Boy Reflects Upon The Sad Transience of Beauty; Boy Bashes Girl’s Skull In With A Rock; Girl Floats Prettily Downstream Ostensing John William Waterhouse’s “Ophelia.”)
What’s a mushroom for if not a mouse stool?
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@Hambeast:
My mom used to tell me that whenever they had a cow with mastitis, he would take the calf off of her and turn her out on to that three acres for a few days so she could eat native medicinal plants. It worked at least 75% of the time; if it didn’t the cow was put out of her misery. Old German farmers in the 1930s never called the vet (or so I was told.)
@Bookworm in hijab:
Hambeast, that’s so cool! I wonder what specific plants were helpful?
Here’s a list of Iowa indigenous plants; I’m not as familiar with their effects as with those of naturalized Old World herbs—let alone their effect on cows—but here you go: http://uipress.lib.uiowa.edu/ppi/common.php
The alliums might have a disinfectant effect (and the milk is already tainted anyway; roses would supply vitamin C.)
Bookworm in hijab – I’ve read that wild garlic is one of the things but I don’t know if mid western US prairie land has that. But that was the beauty part – farmers didn’t have to know what exactly the cows were attracted to because they would find it themselves.
When I was five, my family was in Iowa visiting and the prairie was in full bloom and was just spectacular with orange, yellow, white and pink flowers. There were so many bees there, the buzzing was audible way up at the house, about a quarter mile away! My grandma said it wasn’t that way every year, but it sure was memorable.
@Full Metal Ox:
Only among people who are not familiar with Nick Cave or Kylie.
Bliss. It’s miserably cold and rainy where I am, so I’m enjoying picturing this scene. ?
@Moggie
Very unfamiliar indeed; it’s literally from an album called Murder Ballads
Thank you for all the mousies.
@ Redsilkphoenix
Thanks for those links. That was really interesting reading.
I’m not sure how viable Pleistocene Park is; but it raises some fascinating thoughts.
Re-wilding is a passion of mine. I get a lot of reassurance on my walks. I do a lot of the old mining trails. Now they just cut through what appears to be unspoilt countryside. But I know the history of these places. Less than 200 years ago they were hotbeds of industrial activity. One old mine I like used to employ 50,000 people. Now it looks like this.