Categories
butts rationalization hamster red pill

Grown man has existential crisis over lack of access to his ex-girlfriend’s butt

Yes, I’ve made this joke before

I‘m becoming somewhat addicted to the Ask The Red Pill subreddit; it’s such an amazing mixture of bad ideas and weird insecurities, a place where earnest Red Pill ideologues offer relationship advice to men who really shouldn’t be in relationships of any kind.

Today, let’s look at one recent advice-seeker called bluefingerblue who’s hit the bottom because he’s not hitting any bottoms. He posts his query under the enigmatic title “Scarcity mentality about a specific thing my ex-LTR brought to the table – any advice?”

That specific thing she brought to the table? Turns out it was her butthole.

Mr. Finger begins by noting that he and his long-term girlfriend had recently parted ways. But it’s no biggie, he insists.

Broke up with an LTR two weeks ago. Whatever no big deal. … I’m better off without her and didn’t even necessarily even want to be in the relationship in the first place. Was more of a test drive to practice LTR frame / game during covid.

Yeah, that’s the ticket. It was all a big experiment. I’m not crying, you’re crying.

Been seeing one new girl and in the process of spinning up new plates. I’ve gone no contact with ex-LTR and feeling good about my abundance; however, there’s one specific exception.

BUTT!

Also, there are time-management issues.

I spent months prepping and training my ex-LTR for anal. By the end, she loved it and it was a nice little spice of variety in my sex life.

The issue is I’m experiencing a bit of scarcity mentality when it comes to anal.

But, but, it’s not that big of a deal, really.

It’s not like I don’t think I’ll ever be able to find someone who’s down for it again.

That said, I know it will probably take months to go through that prepping and training process with someone who’s never done it before, and typically the type of girls I see haven’t.

But he wants butt NOW!

How should I think about this? How should I fight off scarcity mentality on this specific issue? Like I don’t want to get back together with my ex, but I do want to rail out her ass again lol.

It’s like he’s got oneitis for her ass.

Except I feel weak and beta for even having those thoughts.

Poor fella. How will he ever be able to KEEP FRAME.

And it’s exasperated [sic] by the fact I know I probably could get her to smash again without commitment by making the first move, but I don’t want to do that for obvious reasons.

Any tips, advice or pointers to address my scarcity mentality on this issue? Thanks lads.

Yeah, here’s a tip. Stop pretending it’s all about your ex’s ass. You’re depressed because you broke up with someone who was a huge part of your life, and you miss her — or at least miss the closeness. This is normal, even if the person you broke up with wasn’t right for you. Allow yourself to have some actual feelings, dude. Feelings that aren’t about ass.

While one commenters gave him some standard Red Pill terrible advice — advising him to go ahead and get back in touch with his ex for the purposes of ass-railing — there were a few reminding him that anal sex is not necessarily the rare and magical thing he seems to think it is. Others were more cynical.

“Wow, you’re the first anal widow we’ve ever had here,” one wrote. “Welcome.”

Of course, none of the commenters suggested that he was actually having feelings about his ex — and not just her ass. Because this is the Red Pill, baby, where emotions are for betas,, where grown men refer to their more casual girlfriends as “plates,” and where it’s better to be an anal widow than to admit that maybe you miss your ex.

Send tips to dfutrelle at gmail dot com.

We Hunted the Mammoth relies entirely on readers like you for its survival. If you appreciate our work, please send a few bucks our way! Thanks!

19 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
fribble
fribble
4 years ago

didn’t even necessarily even want to be in the relationship in the first place. Was more of a test drive to practice LTR frame / game during covid.”

Is he saying that the relationship was a test drive to practice blah blah? If so, then the relationship can’t be more than ten months old, even if he lives in Wuhan. Is that what’s passing for a LTR these days??

Podkayne Lives
Podkayne Lives
4 years ago

Months? What takes months? Is he training her butt for the Olympics?

Naglfar
Naglfar
4 years ago

I thought manospherians were anti-anal anyway. Roosh thinks it will make you gay and others think it’s a Jewish plot for white genocide.

That specific thing she brought to the table? Turns out it was her butthole.

Well TBH my butthole goes wherever I do, so when I go to a table, I bring my butt with me. I’m rather attached to it.

Was more of a test drive to practice LTR frame / game during covid.

Who wants to bet he’s an anti-masker and may have exposed her to COVID-19?

in the process of spinning up new plates.

Am I the only one here who thinks of hard disks when I hear about “spinning plates?”

By the end, she loved it and it was a nice little spice of variety in my sex life.

I question whether she enjoyed it or whether she pretended to in order to avoid upsetting this man. Obviously some people do enjoy receptive anal sex, but it appears that far more cishet men enjoy penetrating their partners anally compared to the number of cishet women who enjoy being penetrated.

typically the type of girls I see haven’t.

I’m guessing this is because he only wants to date virgins or women with little sexual experience. If he actually thought this through and actually cared about partners, he’d probably realize that sexually experienced women are probably more likely to have had anal sex (according to this study, about 36% of women report having had anal sex) or to have it. Then again, more experienced women would probably recognize all his Red Pill warning signs and get the hell away from him.

anal widow

Anal widow is my new rapper name.

Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
4 years ago

Except I feel weak and beta for even having those thoughts.

That’s because you are weak and beta — for a million reasons, including your refusal to grow up and realize that you are not the center of the universe.

And it’s exasperated [sic] by the fact I know I probably could get her to smash again without commitment by making the first move, but I don’t want to do that for obvious reasons.

You’ve certainly exasperated me, so join the effin’ club of exasperated people. Except you’re not much of a person, so I rescind my invitation.

occasional reader
occasional reader
4 years ago

Hello.
Hmm, i had two posts which did not make it through the Akismet filter it seems, let see if this one can.
Scarcity mentality ? Even if he is an asshole, this is not a proper analysis…
Yes, i know it was an easy one.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
4 years ago

Broke up with an LTR two weeks ago. Whatever no big deal. … I’m better off without her and didn’t even necessarily even want to be in the relationship in the first place.

In other words, she dumped him. Now he’s mad that all of his grooming of the relationship to revolve around his needs went to waste.

The “prepping and training” part sounds chillingly coercive. Sure, there are women who are interested in trying anal but need to approach it slowly with a caring and understanding partner. This guy is not that partner. He wants an inexperienced woman whose resistance he can turn into acquiescence and then (in his mind) degradation, and he thinks that if the process unfolds over many months, it technically isn’t rape.

Karen Lewis
Karen Lewis
4 years ago

“it was a nice little spice of variety in my sex life.”

My sex life. Not our. MY!! Because she was just her butt.

Lollypop
Lollypop
4 years ago

Immediately reminded of this:

Lainy
Lainy
4 years ago

Okay, as someone who does anal sex it takes like an hour of prep for me because I’m small and my husband is large. I’ve got a feeling that this dude is really talking about it took months to wear his girlfriend down into doing something she wasn’t comfortable with and it’s probably the reason she left him. since he’s a red pill we already know he doesn’t respect boundaries or see women as people.

Lainy
Lainy
4 years ago

I’ve been married for one year y’all

Naglfar
Naglfar
4 years ago

@Lainy
Congrats on your anniversary!

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
4 years ago

@ lainy

it takes like an hour of prep

I must be getting old. If I had an hour to spare I’d probably just make a cottage pie or something.

Congratulamations on your anniversary though!!!

comment image

Lainy
Lainy
4 years ago

@ Naglfar

Thank you!

@ Alan

we don’t normally have that time so anal sex is like we set aside a day to just be with each other alone type of sex. You got prep though, or else it’s a real pain in the ass.

Lainy
Lainy
4 years ago

You know what is really sad though, I have not seen my husband through the entire first year of our marriage.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
4 years ago

@ lainy

I really feel for you. I have a few friends who are service wives, and I know from them how tough it can be. I did a quick Google and there seems to be a few support networks out there for people in your position. Although it may be you’ve already checked them out. But if there’s any time you need to vent, or just have someone listen, then maybe this is as good a place as any; I think there’s a lot of love for you here.

or else it’s a real pain in the ass

comment image

Lainy
Lainy
4 years ago

@Alan

I’m doing fine. School and my students help keep me pretty occupied right now. had a scary moment with one of my little boy students but we got it all squared away. Had to deal with a slight infection last month because one my real small kids bit me when I had to break up a fight and let me tell you, the human mouth is gross.

Naglfar
Naglfar
4 years ago

@Alan Robertshaw, Lainy

But if there’s any time you need to vent, or just have someone listen, then maybe this is as good a place as any; I think there’s a lot of love for you here.

Seconding this, I’m happy to offer support and I’m sure many others are as well.

Surplus to Requirements
Surplus to Requirements
4 years ago
Gwynfydd
Gwynfydd
4 years ago

It’s not like I don’t think I’ll ever be able to find someone

@Karen

My sex life. Not our. MY!! Because she was just her butt.

Yeah absolutely! Really dehumanising, and the top quote underlines it too, as he says he’s just looking for “someone”, rather than a finding a real woman as a companion. He doesn’t care.

And @Lainy – congratulations on your anniversary!

Last edited 4 years ago by Gwynfydd