Should I change the name of the blog to “We Invented Your Fucking Tampoons, for Fucks Sake?”

epitome:

As for other languages, Farsi (Persian) and Twi (a West African language spoken around Ghana) have gender-neutral 3rd-person pronouns, at least according to friends/colleagues who’d sometimes mix up “he” and “she” in English since they weren’t used to making the distinction.

Naglfar:

In much of Africa gender has historically been viewed very differently than in Europe. For instance, among the Igbo people of Nigeria gender roles and expression were much more fluid, and Igbo native speakers often have the same issues relating to gendered pronouns.

I figure it’s one thing to lack gendering in your language, and another to have a fundamentally different understanding of gender. Finnish at least is pretty much “western” in gender construction.

When I was relatively new to speaking English, I was very conscious of using the correct gendering. Then again, I’ve always been a very cautious speaker and easily out of words if I’m at risk of misspeaking. Some other people (especially from other cultural backgrounds) might feel it’s absolutely necessary to keep talking fluently, even if the wording is a hit and miss.

@Epitome

Sure, many cultures have defined gender roles – e.g. from what I’ve read of the Inuit, they generally have a hunter/gatherer gender distinction – but they don’t always map out to “Western” gender roles and there’s often space for different gender identities.

Many cultures also have support for transgender or non-binary identities, like how many indigenous groups in the Americas view Two-Spirit individuals as sacred.

As for defined hunting and gathering distinctions, these are in practice not clear cut across genders. That comes when groups start settling down. Among hunter-gatherers who need every last bit of food they can find, those who can hunt, hunt, and those who can gather, gather; so male gatherers and female hunters aren’t uncommon. Gender roles get much more enforced when groups settle down and live sedentarios, as this leads to increased distribution of labor.

This makes interesting, and possibly surprising, reading.

https://www.militarytimes.com/news/pentagon-congress/2020/08/31/as-trumps-popularity-slips-in-latest-military-times-poll-more-troops-say-theyll-vote-for-biden/

@epitome of incomprehensibility

One must, but what about two?

One of my favourite lines from Alice Through the Looking-Glass is when, after Alice as told Humpty-Dumpty she’s seven and a half, he replies that it was a most uncomfortable age, and that she should have left off at seven. “One can’t help growing older, you know.” “One can’t, perhaps, but two can. With proper assistance, you might have left off at seven.”

Alice, smart girl that she is, changes the subject. After all, there really is only one way to stop growing older.

@ Bookworm, Distracted, anyone I’ve missed.

Thank you for the heads – ups.

Samantha the longtime lurker said exactly what I was thinking! How does someone keep so many old quotes in their mind? (Your whole comment was spot on to my mind, Samantha, but this stood out.)

I get it that everyone here is done with Lenona– and I was done with Lenona with her “lesbians don’t do one night stands” when, yes!, we do, in huge quantities and we generally all remain friends thirty years later IME–but she reminds me of my Oma (great-grandma). So my sentimentality rules here.

My Oma (the very rock of my young life) was mired in “old” thinking. She’d plop some “truth bomb” from some article and we’d have a lively conversation about it. It was bonding for both of us. I, being a dyke at a very early age (14 in 1979) and she being from Germany (72).

I was young and very willing to teach my Oma about being gay. She taught me a lot too. She said some really craptastic things about lesbians but in the end embraced me.

Lenona doesn’t seem to be able to clearly state her own personal views and so relies on quotes and articles.

Samantha

Also what is your angle?

That’s what I want to know too. I am older and really, super tired of teaching people to be nice to everyone not exactly like themselves, but I have reserves if someone deserves them.

I 100% agree with Buttercup Q. Skullpants and weirwoodtreehugger as I have for years.

I was a model child, my brother was not. You can’t magically have well-behaving children. I don’t even notice children acting up because here in Russia, kids are allowed to just run around in restaurants. Maybe not in “high end” restaurants but in general they are. I don’t even notice them, except when I play with them.

Imagine a couple who have an anniversary and they are so in love and they have kids. They try to get a babysitter and maybe it falls through, so they are “stuck” with their kids.

I am child-free but I have empathy.

@VP
That reminds me a bit of a story from ObGyn Jen Gunter, where she had to call a state senator to ask about an abortion statute (she had a patient at high risk of kidney failure who needed an abortion late in the pregnancy) only to find that the male state senator was completely clueless about how uteruses work and didn’t actually know what the law he signed meant.

In the discussion of children’s reactions to trans people, I think it’s important to recognize that ‘children’ and ‘trans people’ are not discrete groups—children can, in fact, be transgender.

This makes letting children know that being trans is a possibility all the more important.