It’s PLEDGE DRIVE time again! If you’re a fan of this blog, please help fund its continued existence by clicking the button below. THANKS!
By David Futrelle
Angry gamers are somehow still up in arms about the body of the character Abby in The Last of Us 2. You may recall, back in April the angriest gamers — the perpetual Gamergaters — were outraged after a studio leak revealed that the character Abby would be returning in the sequel as a newly-buff fighter with notably jacked arms.
At first the angry gamers assumed that any woman that buff had to be trans, so they accused the game studio, Naughty Dog, of pushing an LGBT+ agenda on innocent gamers. Then, when it turned out that Abby was not trans, the angry gamers got mad at Abby for a whole other reason — declaring that her body was “unrealistic” because where would she be getting enough food to bulk up like that in a postapocalyptic world and did she even lift, bro?
The game has been out for some time now and they’re still mad.
But now the angry gamers think they have found DEFINITIVE PROOF that Abby’s body is too good to be true — in the form of a workout schedule for Abby they discovered somewhere in the games assets that reveals, well, that she doesn’t lift enough to have arms like THAT.
“[A]bby is more muscular Than 90% of the Guys in the gym where i was workout,” complains another gamer on Twitter. “No girl in the gym looks as ugly as Abby.”
Other, er, critics make much of the fact that food is rationed in the dire dystopian world of the game.
“Her food is rationed,” insists one of Abby’s critics. “They SHOW that in game. She’d never be able to get the lean protein required to get that big.”
“Abby … has a muscular physique … in an environment where proper diet is so rare that food is rationed out,” another Abby non-fan grumbles. “You can say you don’t care but you can’t claim that this all about hating women.”
Like hell I can’t.
In case you’re wondering just how jacked this woman is, here’s what she looks like.
This is the body that these guys are declaring so “unrealistic”that it destroys any feelings of immersion in the game — a game that also features, yes, ZOMBIES. You know, creatures that DON’T ACTUALLY EXIST IN REAL LIFE
Come to think of it, has anyone found the zombies’ workout schedule?
More to the point, has anyone even gone looking for the workout schedules for any of the far-more-improbably buff bodies of assorted male video game heroes — say, the top-heavy soldiers in Gears of War, Batman in the Arkham series, Zangief in Street Fighter — or any of the other imaginary video game men on this handy list?
Of course not. It’s almost as if there’s a double standard. It’s almost as if Abby’s critics just can’t stand the thought of a strong women, or something. “It’s such a weird, ultra-specific way to be misogynistic while claiming to appeal to logic,” notes podcaster Jubel Brosseau on Twitter. That it is.
@skimmingway : so you never have seen any of thoses ? She don’t have a long neck, don’t have any of the characteristic of chiuhuahua, don’t have long arms. You may want to use google image to see what thoses animal look like before doing a comparison.
She have somewhat similar hair to the chimera of FMA because the most infamous of thoses chimera have perfectly human hair, and the human hair are the main tell of what happened. So, well. You too have similar hair.
Also, why would it be bad to be ugly ? I can get behind asking to not have a strong body odor on the sake of people getting distracted by that easily (even tho most of the complaints are far fetched and the few that smelled really foul was because of problematic wound or diseases), but not looking at someone is easy enough. Someone who is ugly but do his work well is commendable.
@ohlmann
“Someone who is ugly but do his work well is commendable.”
Not one soul in our increasingly pitiable nation elected that wench, and if they honestly considered their vote for her husband to count as such, I would say right then and there that the time for monarchy in this nation was passed due. She has two jobs, as far as all right-thinking individuals are concerned, and those are to not make an obstacle of herself, and not look like a complete hell-hound while she does it. She has access to plastic surgery, one would assume, but cannot be so kind as to use it before appearing in public. I would sooner see the president of our country marry a mannequin before demonstrating such foul taste as to bind himself to such a ghoul as Michelle. I would hope that Scooby and the gang would be capable of capturing her and revealing that frightening visage of her’s to be mask, but alas, we do live in a reality more chilling than any work of fiction.
So unrealistic… Except for the fact that her arms look a lot like those of my mom when she was around 50 y/o. Having a huge garden may have had something to do with that but I don´t have one at all and my arms are only slightly smaller so I say genetics help.
@skimmingway : traditionally, first ladies aren’t elected but still have responsabilities, which she did very well. So regardless of your opinion on her beauty, which seem either entirely random or motivated by racism, she did her job well. Better than the current one at any rate.
She also worked as an attorney, and a good one at that. Once again, what she look like have 0 importance here.
And no, the responsability of the first lady, as frivolous at it is, isn’t to not look like an hell hound. In fact, I would welcome a president with an hell hound as a wife (or more probably as a pet ? I didn’t get to visit hell yet, but presumably the “hell” part does not supersede enough of the “hound” part), because while it would make the “make charity work and inspire youngster” harder, she could switch on having a role as showing how badass the president is. Best paired with a president who pilot a mecha, like the one in Metal Wolf Chaos.
(note : it’s more important to have good policies and be responsabilities. But piloting mechas and having a court of mythical beasts seem cool add-on once the policy stuff is dealt with)
She looks like about half the women I worked with. Perfectly normal, in other words. Maybe a bit flatter chested than them (not a point against – at least four of the women I am closest to at work have complained that the damned things get in the way!) – but rationed diets do that.
Only thing I’d criticise is her hair – you don’t want long hair in close quarters fighting. Too convenient a grab point, and the tear response to a hard pull is inconvenient when you need to be able to see.
She also needs half gloves – skulls are hard and painful to hit. 😛
I guess they prefer the more realistic women found in the Dead or Alive game serie.
A hundred years ago most working class women would have arms like Abby. Coal and firewood and wet sheets are heavy.
@Ohlmann. Yeah, chihuahuas have tiny, pointy fine boned faces, it’s not a great comparison even if he genuinely thought she was ugly. That’s the right for you, even shite at trolling.
Our beauteous current president genuinely looks like an upside down duck, on the other hand.
@Cal
Are there any women in Gears Of War? (Given that I haven’t seen any Internet whining about chunky women, I’m guessing not.)
@skimmingway
Even if your completely baseless assumption that Michelle Obama is repulsive was somehow correct, you are aware that people can choose to be in relationships with others for reasons beyond physical appearance, right?
@Threp
“She also needs half gloves – skulls are hard and painful to hit.”
She already has a pair that she uses on her husband; if he were married to any other woman, I’d assume it was his own idea.
@Skimmingway
Who are YOU to say all those nasty things about any woman?
I can’t imagine any women at all wanting to be around you considering that you talk like a gross creep and can’t back up what you say like the intelligent people here do.
You are making such a big deal about how a really intelligent accomplished woman looks. But I bet if you were around a woman you thought actually met your beauty standard you would repulse her because you probably repulse most women.
I bet you are one of the creeps who if you met me in person would just stand there like a creep and leer and try to hit on me stumbling over your words but only grossing me out with your leering.
The troll’s latest attempts smack of desperation, but he’s trying so hard! 2/10 for effort, but alas nul points for content or execution.
@opposablethumbs
“2/10 for effort, but alas nul points for content or execution.”
Perfectly describes your mother’s attempts at raising you.
Aw, the troll is trying to pump itself up by explaining how Ms Obama makes its boner sad.
How edgy.
@C. A. Collins
She makes my boner suicidal. That’s a much better way of putting it.
Man, I miss having Michelle Obama as FLOTUS. Not only was she an accomplished attorney, but her First Lady program focused on healthy eating and physical activity (not just formal exercise) for children.
Plus she’s gorgeous, and we should all be so lucky to be married to somebody who looks at us the way Barack Obama looks at her. (I certainly feel lucky with Mr. Parasol.)
@skimmingway
So if you don’t find Michelle Obama physically attractive then what’s an example of a woman that you think she should look like?
I still think you are a creep but I’m curious.
I bet you are one of those creeps who think that no cishet woman who is attractive by conventional beauty standards would ever be a feminist.
@skimmingway
Well to be honest we thought it died ages ago along with your morals, ethics, empathy and sense of appropriateness
@Mog:
I just assumed the fraidycat was trying to tell the world that they had all the sexism of Hemmingway, but rejected Hemmingway’s tendency to read.
A look at the Last of Us video game franchise from one of my favorite YouTubers. Yes, it’s long – she doesn’t do short reviews, but thoughtful examinations.
@skimmingway:
This may come as a surprise to you, but you are absolutely more repugnant than Michelle Obama.
I assume you will take it upon yourself to implement the appropriate actions.
@skimmingway
What on earth are you wittering on about?
If you find that you simply can’t help blathering away like an elderly doctrinaire, could you at least avoid using the cringingly forced language of a badly written school play?
@Lollypop
Oh, skimmingway is convinced he’s a writer whose prose is SO AWESOME that it’s beyond our comprehension or ability to appreciate. I’ve already chuckled several times. Either he’ll learn better and grow out of it, or he won’t.
@ Vicky P
Me too; and her hubby.
Remember the days when aliens could demand “Take me to your leader!” and you didn’t have to be all embarrassed about it?
@Stacey
I care only for the aesthetics, as I am actually quite incapable of experiencing sexual arousal most of the time; the very thought of sexual activity is somewhat distressing to me, and I find the notion that I would ogle you, expressed in your previous post, to be risible, and not just because of how specific that particular little jab of yours was.
Her face is too elongated, her eyes are far too close together, her face is insufficiently symmetrical, arms are long and veiny… I could go on, but unlike any of those men of yours that you take such delight in gushing about, I’d rather not torture myself.
I cannot define for you what my “ideal woman” would look like, as I am quite unsure myself what such a person would consist of; it exists in a realm beyond which the powers of my imagination can access, and should I even care enough to bring it to mind, I would not likely be able to describe it in anyway that would satisfy the both of us.