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Today’s Episode of MGTOW Cooking brought to you by Acme Frozen Green Beans

Mmmmm! And they’re even better cooked!

By David Futrelle

It’s time once again to venture into the wondrous world of MGTOW cooking. All of the images below were posted to the Men Going Their Own Way subreddit by proud MGTOW chefs. Look upon these marvelous culinary achievements and weep, ladies; these guys don’t need you evil harpies to feed them any more!

But first, a word from our sponsor, Acme Frozen Green Beans, the beans that are blandly delicious even served completely plain without so much as salt or pepper!

Next we have some delicious steaks and other raw meatstuffs. I just hope these are the before pictures, and not the finished meals. And I wish only the best of health to the dude who’s putting raw steak on the same wooden board he’s serving cheese and crackers off of.

Here is a burrito, insofar as that is the correct term for a bunch of stuff piled atop an uncooked tortilla that this guy has no idea how to fold up into a burrito.

But this last one is my favorite. Some “gourmet” Italian foodstuff carefully arranged in a lovely little tableau with a Febreze Candle Air Freshener and a FedEx envelope and a wallet I think and maybe a boombox, I can’t tell. Because it’s all about the presentation.

The guy posted this under the headline:

Get a girlfriend/married, she will cook for you. Surrrrreeeeee. I’ll gladly cook a gourmet Italian dinner with a delicious wine for myself by myself because we all know women dont cook. CHEERS GENTS!

These guys are sure showing the ladies that they know how to live!

Send tips to dfutrelle at gmail dot com.

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263 Comments
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Aron
Aron
4 years ago

@Skimmingway You are a basement Nazi. Just be a man and admit it.

(And before you say anything, Bill Buckley is one of my rhetorical heroes. So STFU.)

Oh, and make sure your reply has at least a hundred words. Anything less than that and I will be deeply disappointed! Verbose twit.

Dalillama
Dalillama
4 years ago

Dude, nobody but fascists has cited Spengler in 70+ years. You’d know that if you’d actually read a history book written in your lifetime. William F. Buckley got his start and spent his life as a champion of Jim Crow, white supremacist shite that he was. So yes, Buckley was a fascist. You’re really not helping your case, laddie-buck.

Naglfar
Naglfar
4 years ago

@skimmingway

Spengler himself was no Nazi. Not all fascists are Nazi’s, you know.

But you admit he was a fascist? So you admit that the left is right to classify him as such?

Out of curiosity, when are you going to start going off about (((Teh Jewz)))?

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
4 years ago

@Katherine the Adequate

Hot water crust is a low-sugar crust very suitable for savory pies. It’s also ridiculously easy to make and even easier to use. It is sturdy and will hold an upright shape once baked, and unless you’re careless it will hold in the juices when the pie is baking. If you’re making non-dessert pies, I can’t say enough good things about it.

Mrs. Obed Marsh
Mrs. Obed Marsh
4 years ago

Just a hint? You can’t string together a bunch of ten-dollar words just to try and impress other people while bragging about all the philosophy you’ve read and call others elitist and out-of-touch with the working man. You have to pick one or the other.

Also … don’t be a fascist.

skimmingway
skimmingway
4 years ago

@Dallilama

White supremacist =/= Fascist. One can, in fact, be one and not the other. The fact that W. F. Buckley was, in your words, a “white supremacist” does not mean that the man was a fascist. Similarly, being a fascist does NOT make one, of necessity, a white supremacist. You have conducted absolutely NO unbiased or well-rounded examinations into this, you have merely regurgitated streams of leftist propaganda of the sort that have been moronically penned since the day that Trotsky decided to declare himself an expert in fascism.

@Naglfart

Are yo aware that there were Jews working in Mussolini’s government? That Franco was part Jewish? Being a fascist does not, in itself, make one an antisemite. I’m not a fascist, I’m just completely flummoxed at the display of ignorance and guilt by association that you all have put on.

skimmingway
skimmingway
4 years ago

I was in the MIDDLE of making a point before you banned me, thank you very fucking much!!!

Dalillama
Dalillama
4 years ago

@Aron

And before you say anything, Bill Buckley is one of my rhetorical heroes

You should either reconsider that position, or at least not bring it up among decent folk.

Mrs. Obed Marsh
Mrs. Obed Marsh
4 years ago

I was in the MIDDLE of making a point before you banned me, thank you very fucking much!!!

Getting a little emotional there, pal. Maybe you should read some of the Stoics. You know, like Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, Epictetus?

Aron
Aron
4 years ago

@Skimmingway

If you had been banned, you wouldn’t be able to finish that thought.

Dumdum.

Naglfar
Naglfar
4 years ago

@skimmingway

Are yo aware that there were Jews working in Mussolini’s government? That Franco was part Jewish? Being a fascist does not, in itself, make one an antisemite.

I’m Jewish. Trust me, I know what antisemitism looks like. Fascism is, and always has been, antisemitic. And it’s 100% possible to be related to Jews or work with Jews and be an antisemite, look at Donald Trump and his son in law.

just completely flummoxed at the display of ignorance and guilt by association that you all have put on.

So you are basically this meme:comment image

I was in the MIDDLE of making a point before you banned me, thank you very fucking much!!!

Unfortunately, you aren’t banned.

Aron
Aron
4 years ago

@Dalillama I never said the man was perfect. I said he could write. (The same thing goes for that Nazi schmuck Ezra Pound.)

And we’re both on the same side here. Even if we don’t agree on everything.

Etymologist
Etymologist
4 years ago

Real men only eat badly prepared fugu. Their super-virile immune systems take care of the tetrodotoxin, or else they die. Taking that risk separates the men from the, er, pajama boys.

Also, I am pretty sure that Skimmingway is really a certain Jack Donovan.

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

I was in the MIDDLE of making a point before you banned me, thank you very fucking much!!!

comment image

Aron
Aron
4 years ago

@Etymogist, I think you might be on to something with that Jack Donovan reference…

And as to the temperature of beef, I always eat my steak super rare or Pittsburgh. It’s my own personal taste. But I’m certainly not going to judge you for how you eat yours. Unless you burn it to a crisp. Then we’ve got an issue.

Aron
Aron
4 years ago

@Weirwoodtreehugger Come see the violence inherent in the system!

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
4 years ago

Also, I am pretty sure that Skimmingway is really a certain Jack Donovan.

He’s not subtle – his name and the way he thinks floridity = eloquence shows that he wants to be Hemmingway.

Mrs. Obed Marsh
Mrs. Obed Marsh
4 years ago

He’s not subtle – his name and the way he thinks floridity = eloquence shows that he wants to be Hemmingway.

But Hemingway was known for his sparse, economical prose! So this guy can’t respect him that much.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
4 years ago

But Hemingway was known for his sparse, economical prose! So this guy can’t respect him that much.

He wants to be Hemingway. That doesn’t mean he understands Hemingway. And he’s definitely not the world’s next Hemingway.

Naglfar
Naglfar
4 years ago

Hemingway was also very much against Franco, as he traveled to Spain to fight him.

Catalpa
Catalpa
4 years ago

I was in the MIDDLE of making a point before you banned me, thank you very fucking much!!!

You’ve been in the middle of making one long, meandering, long-winded point for the last three pages. I don’t expect that you’ll wrap up making your point any time soon, so you can’t really expect us to wait until you finish your meaningless word salad.

Aside from that, David usually shows up to announce when trolls get banned. If your post doesn’t automatically appear before then, it’s either because of a glitch in the comments that sometimes causes delayed posting, or because you put something more shitty than usual in your post and triggered the spam filter. And honestly, I don’t really care which one it is.

Dalillama
Dalillama
4 years ago

@Aron

I said he could write

Write what? Certainly not a cogent case for anything whatsoever. Like our unwelcome guest, he had access to a thesaurus and was capable of stringing together words into sentences. Also like said guest, his only skill was sounding pompous. He couldn’t argue, he couldn’t entertain, and he couldn’t inform. What praisworthy elements do you find in his drivel?

Lainy
Lainy
4 years ago

I don’t think troll boy has any point

Etymologist
Etymologist
4 years ago

@Policy of Madness, I guess our visitor only skimmed his Hemingway.

@Aron

I think you might be on to something with that Jack Donovan reference…

It’s obvious, isn’t it? The purple prose, the manlier-than-thou pretension, the strawmanning, the idealization of virile self-sufficient tradesmen & laborers, the fondness for reactionary thinkers like Evola and de Maistre, the masturbational fantasy that — come society’s welcome collapse — he and those like him will deservedly become the masters. All rooted in deep insecurity and fed by ressentiment. I read way too much Donovan back when I was trying to figure out the alt-right, and I’d recognize that style anywhere.

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