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Today’s Episode of MGTOW Cooking brought to you by Acme Frozen Green Beans

Mmmmm! And they’re even better cooked!

By David Futrelle

It’s time once again to venture into the wondrous world of MGTOW cooking. All of the images below were posted to the Men Going Their Own Way subreddit by proud MGTOW chefs. Look upon these marvelous culinary achievements and weep, ladies; these guys don’t need you evil harpies to feed them any more!

But first, a word from our sponsor, Acme Frozen Green Beans, the beans that are blandly delicious even served completely plain without so much as salt or pepper!

Next we have some delicious steaks and other raw meatstuffs. I just hope these are the before pictures, and not the finished meals. And I wish only the best of health to the dude who’s putting raw steak on the same wooden board he’s serving cheese and crackers off of.

Here is a burrito, insofar as that is the correct term for a bunch of stuff piled atop an uncooked tortilla that this guy has no idea how to fold up into a burrito.

But this last one is my favorite. Some “gourmet” Italian foodstuff carefully arranged in a lovely little tableau with a Febreze Candle Air Freshener and a FedEx envelope and a wallet I think and maybe a boombox, I can’t tell. Because it’s all about the presentation.

The guy posted this under the headline:

Get a girlfriend/married, she will cook for you. Surrrrreeeeee. I’ll gladly cook a gourmet Italian dinner with a delicious wine for myself by myself because we all know women dont cook. CHEERS GENTS!

These guys are sure showing the ladies that they know how to live!

Send tips to dfutrelle at gmail dot com.

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Aron
Aron
9 months ago

@Skimmingway You are a basement Nazi. Just be a man and admit it.

(And before you say anything, Bill Buckley is one of my rhetorical heroes. So STFU.)

Oh, and make sure your reply has at least a hundred words. Anything less than that and I will be deeply disappointed! Verbose twit.

Dalillama
Dalillama
9 months ago

Dude, nobody but fascists has cited Spengler in 70+ years. You’d know that if you’d actually read a history book written in your lifetime. William F. Buckley got his start and spent his life as a champion of Jim Crow, white supremacist shite that he was. So yes, Buckley was a fascist. You’re really not helping your case, laddie-buck.

Naglfar
Naglfar
9 months ago

@skimmingway

Spengler himself was no Nazi. Not all fascists are Nazi’s, you know.

But you admit he was a fascist? So you admit that the left is right to classify him as such?

Out of curiosity, when are you going to start going off about (((Teh Jewz)))?

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
9 months ago

@Katherine the Adequate

Hot water crust is a low-sugar crust very suitable for savory pies. It’s also ridiculously easy to make and even easier to use. It is sturdy and will hold an upright shape once baked, and unless you’re careless it will hold in the juices when the pie is baking. If you’re making non-dessert pies, I can’t say enough good things about it.

Mrs. Obed Marsh
Mrs. Obed Marsh
9 months ago

Just a hint? You can’t string together a bunch of ten-dollar words just to try and impress other people while bragging about all the philosophy you’ve read and call others elitist and out-of-touch with the working man. You have to pick one or the other.

Also … don’t be a fascist.

skimmingway
skimmingway
9 months ago

@Dallilama

White supremacist =/= Fascist. One can, in fact, be one and not the other. The fact that W. F. Buckley was, in your words, a “white supremacist” does not mean that the man was a fascist. Similarly, being a fascist does NOT make one, of necessity, a white supremacist. You have conducted absolutely NO unbiased or well-rounded examinations into this, you have merely regurgitated streams of leftist propaganda of the sort that have been moronically penned since the day that Trotsky decided to declare himself an expert in fascism.

@Naglfart

Are yo aware that there were Jews working in Mussolini’s government? That Franco was part Jewish? Being a fascist does not, in itself, make one an antisemite. I’m not a fascist, I’m just completely flummoxed at the display of ignorance and guilt by association that you all have put on.

skimmingway
skimmingway
9 months ago

I was in the MIDDLE of making a point before you banned me, thank you very fucking much!!!

Dalillama
Dalillama
9 months ago

@Aron

And before you say anything, Bill Buckley is one of my rhetorical heroes

You should either reconsider that position, or at least not bring it up among decent folk.

Mrs. Obed Marsh
Mrs. Obed Marsh
9 months ago

I was in the MIDDLE of making a point before you banned me, thank you very fucking much!!!

Getting a little emotional there, pal. Maybe you should read some of the Stoics. You know, like Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, Epictetus?

Aron
Aron
9 months ago

@Skimmingway

If you had been banned, you wouldn’t be able to finish that thought.

Dumdum.

Naglfar
Naglfar
9 months ago

@skimmingway

Are yo aware that there were Jews working in Mussolini’s government? That Franco was part Jewish? Being a fascist does not, in itself, make one an antisemite.

I’m Jewish. Trust me, I know what antisemitism looks like. Fascism is, and always has been, antisemitic. And it’s 100% possible to be related to Jews or work with Jews and be an antisemite, look at Donald Trump and his son in law.

just completely flummoxed at the display of ignorance and guilt by association that you all have put on.

So you are basically this meme:comment image

I was in the MIDDLE of making a point before you banned me, thank you very fucking much!!!

Unfortunately, you aren’t banned.

Aron
Aron
9 months ago

@Dalillama I never said the man was perfect. I said he could write. (The same thing goes for that Nazi schmuck Ezra Pound.)

And we’re both on the same side here. Even if we don’t agree on everything.

Etymologist
Etymologist
9 months ago

Real men only eat badly prepared fugu. Their super-virile immune systems take care of the tetrodotoxin, or else they die. Taking that risk separates the men from the, er, pajama boys.

Also, I am pretty sure that Skimmingway is really a certain Jack Donovan.

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

I was in the MIDDLE of making a point before you banned me, thank you very fucking much!!!

comment image

Aron
Aron
9 months ago

@Etymogist, I think you might be on to something with that Jack Donovan reference…

And as to the temperature of beef, I always eat my steak super rare or Pittsburgh. It’s my own personal taste. But I’m certainly not going to judge you for how you eat yours. Unless you burn it to a crisp. Then we’ve got an issue.

Aron
Aron
9 months ago

@Weirwoodtreehugger Come see the violence inherent in the system!

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
9 months ago

Also, I am pretty sure that Skimmingway is really a certain Jack Donovan.

He’s not subtle – his name and the way he thinks floridity = eloquence shows that he wants to be Hemmingway.

Mrs. Obed Marsh
Mrs. Obed Marsh
9 months ago

He’s not subtle – his name and the way he thinks floridity = eloquence shows that he wants to be Hemmingway.

But Hemingway was known for his sparse, economical prose! So this guy can’t respect him that much.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
9 months ago

But Hemingway was known for his sparse, economical prose! So this guy can’t respect him that much.

He wants to be Hemingway. That doesn’t mean he understands Hemingway. And he’s definitely not the world’s next Hemingway.

Naglfar
Naglfar
9 months ago

Hemingway was also very much against Franco, as he traveled to Spain to fight him.

Catalpa
Catalpa
9 months ago

I was in the MIDDLE of making a point before you banned me, thank you very fucking much!!!

You’ve been in the middle of making one long, meandering, long-winded point for the last three pages. I don’t expect that you’ll wrap up making your point any time soon, so you can’t really expect us to wait until you finish your meaningless word salad.

Aside from that, David usually shows up to announce when trolls get banned. If your post doesn’t automatically appear before then, it’s either because of a glitch in the comments that sometimes causes delayed posting, or because you put something more shitty than usual in your post and triggered the spam filter. And honestly, I don’t really care which one it is.

Dalillama
Dalillama
9 months ago

@Aron

I said he could write

Write what? Certainly not a cogent case for anything whatsoever. Like our unwelcome guest, he had access to a thesaurus and was capable of stringing together words into sentences. Also like said guest, his only skill was sounding pompous. He couldn’t argue, he couldn’t entertain, and he couldn’t inform. What praisworthy elements do you find in his drivel?

Lainy
Lainy
9 months ago

I don’t think troll boy has any point

Etymologist
Etymologist
9 months ago

@Policy of Madness, I guess our visitor only skimmed his Hemingway.

@Aron

I think you might be on to something with that Jack Donovan reference…

It’s obvious, isn’t it? The purple prose, the manlier-than-thou pretension, the strawmanning, the idealization of virile self-sufficient tradesmen & laborers, the fondness for reactionary thinkers like Evola and de Maistre, the masturbational fantasy that — come society’s welcome collapse — he and those like him will deservedly become the masters. All rooted in deep insecurity and fed by ressentiment. I read way too much Donovan back when I was trying to figure out the alt-right, and I’d recognize that style anywhere.

Naglfar
Naglfar
9 months ago

@Aron
I know. I’m not saying he was good or defending him, I’m just saying he wasn’t a big fan of Franco.

Schnookums Von Fancypants, Assailed by Gynocratic Powers
Schnookums Von Fancypants, Assailed by Gynocratic Powers
9 months ago

Hmm, it seems like the current pinata hasn’t technically run out of candy, but now it’s all stuff like circus peanuts and the like. Hardly worth beating on them at that point.

Aron
Aron
9 months ago

@Naglfar

I understand completely what you’re saying. I was just very saddened to read that article the other day, and felt it was pertinent to the conversation.

Aron
Aron
9 months ago

Test

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
9 months ago

@Aron

Grade: A-

Naglfar
Naglfar
9 months ago

@Schnookums
I imagine he’ll get a ban soon enough now that he’s defending literal fascist regimes and shilling for the likes of Evola and Buchanan.

Aron
Aron
9 months ago

@Schnookums

A-? I’ll take it!

skimmingway
skimmingway
9 months ago

@Naglfart

I did not, nor have I ever, “defended” fascist regimes. The only “crime” I am guilty of is suggesting that anarchists and other assorted leftist radicals are, to the extent that they are not completely inefficient at suppressing the tide of rising right-wing revanchism, indirectly contributing to their militancy and sureness of aims. Moreover, I added some clarification regarding what I (and anyone with an IQ over 72) would regard to be mischaracterizations and gross distortions about fascists’ relations to antisemitism, white nationalism, and Nazism, which is NOT fascism in and of itself, but rather, a specific branch or type of fascism. How would you all like it, if I dismissed the entire concept of socialism or wealth redistribution based singularly on the actions of previously existing socialist governments? You’d be all “but that’s state capitalism! Not socialism!” I strongly suggest that you learn to not put words into people’s mouths, and brush up on your reading comprehension skills.

Lainy
Lainy
9 months ago

@skimmingay

Wow you are an idiot aren’t you. Your like little dog that barks at a big dog thinking they have a chance. Maybe settle down before a big dog sits on you and yoy relaize how small and pathetic you are

Naglfar
Naglfar
9 months ago

@skimmingway

I did not, nor have I ever, “defended” fascist regimes.

What about when you rattled off your list of fascist intellectuals and talked about how great Franco was?

I added some clarification regarding what I (and anyone with an IQ over 72) would regard to be mischaracterizations and gross distortions about fascists’ relations to antisemitism, white nationalism, and Nazism, which is NOT fascism in and of itself, but rather, a specific branch or type of fascism.

That’s not what you did, but ok. Fascism is antisemitic. Trust me, I know this.

How would you all like it, if I dismissed the entire concept of socialism or wealth redistribution based singularly on the actions of previously existing socialist governments?

Conservatives dismiss socialism all the time. I’m used to it.

You’d be all “but that’s state capitalism! Not socialism!”

I strongly suggest that you learn to not put words into people’s mouths

Take your own advice. I didn’t say that.

You really are like a case study in projection.

Aron
Aron
9 months ago

@Skimmingway

STFU Basement Nazi. The only person you are impressing with your terrible writing is yourself.

https://youtu.be/yUGZwlLoZh0

Lainy
Lainy
9 months ago

@naglfar

I’m sorry the troll is signaling you out.

Naglfar
Naglfar
9 months ago

@Lainy
It’s okay. I accept that he’s just an asshole, and I’m engaging mainly to point out his hypocrisy to any lurkers.

I imagine he’s some edgy teen who spent the quarantine reading alt right manifestos online and now thinks he’s a genius because he can name drop ancaps and fascists.

Mrs. Obed Marsh
Mrs. Obed Marsh
9 months ago

skimmingway, don’t you have anything more important to do? I mean, of course us basement-dweller leftists have plenty of time to bloviate in a blog post comment section that hardly anybody will see, since we are such sad pathetic soycuck losers. What’s your excuse?

Naglfar
Naglfar
9 months ago

@Mrs. Obed Marsh
Maybe today was his day off from being a 329-year-old working class actuary manager and engineer.

I wonder how much more flounce he’s got in him before he finds the door (possibly with David’s help).

Lainy
Lainy
9 months ago

@naglfar

I know. I just don’t like it when the wanna be Nazis target you.

skimmingway
skimmingway
9 months ago

@Mrs. Obed Marsh

You should just be grateful that I’ve even taken the time to try and educate you dolts. I should have known that it would have been a task that even Sisyphus wouldn’t trade his boulder for.

Lainy
Lainy
9 months ago

@skimmingay

Yeah you sure are teaching us. You aren’t just an angry little boy screaming to sound cool or anything lol. What happened? Mommy put on child blocks and you can’t get to porn sites so you have to anger wank?

Aron
Aron
9 months ago

Yup. Skimmingway is a fifteen year old. That’s the confirmation I’ve been looking for.

skimmingway
skimmingway
9 months ago

@Lainy

I’M not singling anyone out. I’ve responded to Naglfart, Autistic Giraffe, Dallilama, Mrs Obed Marsh, and I’ve written some messages that were explicitly directed at EVERYONE here. I respond to messages that warrant them. You should consider yourself fortunate that I’ve even deigned to spend time writing you.

Naglfar
Naglfar
9 months ago

@skimmingway

I’ve even taken the time to try and educate you dolts.

Isn’t that a bit like shitting on a chessboard then expecting your opponent to be glad you showed them a new opening game? You came in here unrequested and have overstayed your welcome.

(For some reason we end up using the metaphor of a pidgeon shitting on a chessboard to describe trolls a lot. Tells much about the kinds of trolls we get.)

You should consider yourself fortunate that I’ve even deigned to spend time writing you.

Who do you think you are, exactly? You might want to shrink your ego slightly, maybe then it won’t get bruised so easily.

Lainy
Lainy
9 months ago

@skimmingay

Lol. Little tiny dog. Bark again for me. Come on. You wanna? Maybe if your a good boy I’ll rub your stomach

@naglfar

He’s a little tiny dog that thinks he’s a big dog.

Naglfar
Naglfar
9 months ago

@Lainy
It’s also telling what he chooses to respond to. He never responds directly to most questions asked of him, as he knows he doesn’t have good answers, so he instead resorts to ad hominem attacks.

Snowberry
Snowberry
9 months ago

@Lainy:

Your like little dog that barks at a big dog thinking they have a chance.

Not a great metaphor. Actual big dogs tend to back down from little dogs, because they’re disturbed by how vicious the baby puppy is.

Or maybe it is, except he only thinks that collectively people here are the big dog. If so, then the individuals going after him are actually a pack of little dogs. Bad move.

Lainy
Lainy
9 months ago

@snowberry

That is an excellent point. How about hes a racist white teenager who harassed a black student and her boyfriend kicked his butt because of it so he cried bully afterwards. Because I’ve seen that in my life and and this whiny piss baby reminds me of that

@ nagflar

Yeah male wanna be Nazis are normally the definition of fragile egos, fragile masculinity, and paper thin skin.