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Today’s Incel Insight: Chads have sex with ugly women just to make incels more miserable

A flock of chads searching for ugly girls

By David Futrelle

One of the tenets of Red Pill thought, uncritically adopted by incels, is that the supersexy Chads who are out there having sex while incels stew at home are literally having sex with almost all women — not just their hot “looksmatches” but also the women that even incels think are ugly.

Why is this (imaginary thing that isn’t happening) happening? One commenter on the Incels.co forums thinks he has an answer: Chads have sex with “ugly girls” to make incels more miserable than they already are.

[Blackpill] The main reason Chad has sex with ugly girls is to DESTROY YOU in order to reduce competition
 personalityinkwell
mentally crippled by lonely teen years
★★★★★
Joined
Dec 27, 2019
Posts
29,633
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105d 22h 18m
Today at 1:02 AM
#1
Chad doesn't need to have sex with uglies, but he does. Why? 2 reasons

1. It provides endless variety and is easy
2. It leaves you sexless, making you not function properly

There have been countless studies done to show that not getting sex fucks your life up, and we also know that not getting sex fucks you socially, and makes it harder to focus on academics and work.

Understand, in this world, whenever one person has something positive, another fails. Life is a zero sum game. Chad WANTS you to suffer, the more you suffer, the more power he has. Tinder is Chad's secret weapon to stomp on not only incels, but normies, and leave them feeling LIFELESS. This makes it easier for Chad to succeed in all aspects of life.

The commenters on Incels.co had mixed reactions to personalityinkwell’s thesis. Some agreed that it was all about screwing incels over. As one commenter put it:

This is the reason I hate chads. I’m okay with him going after his looksmatch stacies. But why the fuck does he have to go and vioate my looksmatch? He could’ve lived in his own bubble with his stacy harem. And I could’ve lived with my oneitis becky. But Nooooo.

Other commenters don’t think that Chad spends any time thinking abuot incels at all; he’s just horny.

To think that Chad consciously think about ugly men when he go about doing his business is a faggoty mindset . Chads could care less about ugly men as like some one stepping on a cockroach. He doesn’t think about ugly men or devise some plan to destroy them. He is only thinking about getting 3 different foids per day.

It’s really quite amazing how much sex is going on in incel brains, given how little actual sex is going on in the real world. Even the horniest, handsomest Chads aren’t out there routinely having sex with three different women a day. It’s all in your heads, dudes.

Jerk off. Take a cold shower. Go play a video game. Do something to clean the sex out of your head for a little while — and maybe the constant resentment will ease up a bit as well. You’re the ones making yourself miserable, not Chad.

Send tips to dfutrelle at gmail dot com.

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Tabby Lavalamp
Tabby Lavalamp
3 months ago

I wonder how much of this is tied up with how they evaluate women’s looks. Any time they see a woman they consider unattractive with someone they consider a Chad, that’s a point in alleged data (though weirdly they never take the reverse into consideration).

Then there is the whole “looksmatch” thing. I’d love to see an actual study to see what they consider their “looksmatch” versus random people of all genders taking photos and “looksmatching” them.

Naglfar
Naglfar
3 months ago

@Tabby Lavalamp
A bit ago we had a troll rambling about looksmatching. A few commenters tried to get him to post some pictures of what looksmatched couples look like, but had no luck.

I’ve never seen a single consistent definition of a looksmatch, but every manospherian thinks that every average looking man is entitled to a teenage virgin who looks like a supermodel and that women don’t get a say.

Naglfar
Naglfar
3 months ago

O/T: Well, here’s a bit of surprising good news. The SCOTUS has ruled that LGBT people are protected by sex anti discrimination laws.

Here’s the full court opinion for anyone interested:
https://www.supremecourt.gov/opinions/19pdf/17-1618_hfci.pdf

francis
francis
3 months ago

@ naglfar

yes that’s what I was thinking of thanks for the correction.

Ohlmann
Ohlmann
3 months ago

@Nagflar : alway good to see specks of light in the ocean of darkness.

I just have read about that inane rambling of Trump on how he is the president who did the most for black since the start of the USA. I can’t tell if he know that it’s bullshit but say it to troll opponents and rise up proponents, or if he is *that* senile that he can’t realize how wrong it is.

Jenora Feuer
Jenora Feuer
3 months ago

@Naglfar:
That’s great! And yes, somewhat surprising from the current Supreme Court. But at least the U.S. caught up to Canada’s rulings on ‘analogous grounds’ of discrimination from twenty years ago.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Section_Fifteen_of_the_Canadian_Charter_of_Rights_and_Freedoms#Enumerated_or_analogous_grounds

(The Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms rewrote a lot of the core constitutional law in Canada, though a lot of it was just writing down things that hadn’t been explicitly written before. It still took another generation for most of the fallout from that to settle, and it only went as quickly as it did because there was an active program from within the government to help support and fund test cases.)

Naglfar
Naglfar
3 months ago

@Ohlmann

I just have read about that inane rambling of Trump on how he is the president who did the most for black since the start of the USA. I can’t tell if he know that it’s bullshit but say it to troll opponents and rise up proponents, or if he is *that* senile that he can’t realize how wrong it is.

I think he’s playing for the big lie here, it’s not true but if he says it enough his legions of supporters will believe it.

Shadowplay
3 months ago

Risky tactic.

Yeah, his base will believe pretty much anything he tells them – problem is if they believe this, they’re not going to be too happy with him. Not exactly fond of non-whites, are they.

Naglfar
Naglfar
3 months ago

@Shadowplay
Ah, but it gives them a cover so they can say they aren’t racist, which is something they want because they are very racist but most of them want to pretend they’re not.

Moggie
Moggie
3 months ago

Jesus, Alito actually cited dictionary definitions in his lengthy rant – sorry, dissent.

Naglfar
Naglfar
3 months ago

Probably unrelated to their legal defeat, TERFs are now once again trying to claim that (cis) women do not orgasm (or at least that cis women can’t ejaculate) with their new hashtag. Graham Linehan has already asserted this before, but they seem to be digging in here again.

@Moggie
Unsurprising, that’s a popular tactic among transphobes, such as the ones who insist on labeling women as “adult human females” like animals.

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
3 months ago

Last I checked, a significant driver of Trump’s popularity from 2016 onward was the hope on many racists’ parts that they would no longer have to pretend they’re not. They want to turn back the clock to when you could use the N-word in polite (white) company again without being ostracized, fired, or otherwise incurring negative consequences and social opprobrium.

Meanwhile, the neverending shitshow of my own life continues. I was able to obtain some supplies from a last-minute appearance by a relative, and that same relative’s co-signature was able to get me a low-limit ($200) credit card.

So, my problems getting supplies are solved, right?

Of course not!

Were I any random ordinary person they would be, and likely would have been ten times over by now, but I’m not any random ordinary person. I am The Target.

So I go to install Instacart on my (recently replaced) phone and get stymied at about step 3 of the setup: “Please enter a valid CA postal code”. Try as I might I cannot get it to recognize my postal code as a valid Canadian postal code. I double and triple check the spelling against pieces of paper mail I have that were addressed to me here. I try both with and without the space. Nothing works. The Post Office itself seems to think it’s valid, but Instacart does not.

I cannot fathom how a bug this severe was not caught by testing — AUTOMATED testing, even. I emailed tech support of course. Nada. It’s been two hours now and all I got back was a form letter from a bot. This when per their (obviously way overpromising) marketing I should have had actual food, physically delivered in as little as half that time, let alone have had the app configured.

So now I have a completely useless credit card and, once again, the clock ticking down on my supplies. Unless someone knows of a workaround for this Instacart bug (and a solid reason to trust them with a credit card number when they can’t even manage to get postal codes right) or an alternative that also operates within Canada …

And meanwhile: can ANYONE explain why when I try to do things that everyone else in the developed world does on a weekly basis without any unusual difficulties whatsoever, some new and inexplicable obstacle gets strewn in my path? I mean, presumably that app works for everyone else, just not me, just as the previous obstacles all have hit me either disproportionately or exclusively. I am clearly being singled out here, by something, but why? What the hell did I do, offend Poseidon or Ganesh or Ryūjin or some such as a small child or something? I seem to be, quite literally, cursed.

Or is all of this some Matrix I’m plugged into and whoever’s running the thing is toying with me for their own personal amusement or something? Because it sure seems that way a lot of the time …

My ultimatum remains, with the deadline shifted. To whomever is running the Matrix, if I don’t have this solved by Wednesday evening I will quit your poxy glorified video game. I did not consent to be forced to play it on Nightmare mode difficulty!

contrapangloss
contrapangloss
3 months ago

Surplus, get help. I’ve said this before, but no one here is qualified to provide what you need.

With respect to the apps, apps and software fail everyone at some point. If you have doubts, just sort for all the one-star reviews in your AP store of choice. There will be MANY typed out rants of rage and frustration.

Also, 2 hours would actually be a ridiculously fast turnaround from a help message. Last time I had to contact help for a malfunctioning app, I had about a 30 hour delay before my query got addressed with the first reply, and it was 5 days of emailing back and forth before everything was finally sorted.

With how many more people are using services like Instacart right now, it is not a surprise that they might be even buggier than usual.

You are not alone. You are not being targeted by malicious entities out to curse you.

I worry for you, but other than reassuring you that apps can be buggy for everyone, there’s not much I can do for you.

Editing to add: I’m sincerely worried based off your last paragraph. If you haven’t, please consider calling a crisis line. Even if you have and discarded the notion, reconsider.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
3 months ago

just sort for all the one-star reviews in your AP store

I love that kids in China gave the homework app they were being forced to use one star reviews so it got kicked from the App Store.

https://www.republicworld.com/world-news/rest-of-the-world-news/chinese-kids-downvote-app-being-used-to-give-them-homework.html

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
3 months ago

I mean, presumably that app works for everyone else, just not me, just as the previous obstacles all have hit me either disproportionately or exclusively. I am clearly being singled out here

Google tells me that lots of people over the years have been affected by Instacart not recognizing their postal code. You’re not being singled out.

Naglfar
Naglfar
3 months ago

@Surplus
Please, do as others have suggested and call for help. There are other people which can help you much more than I can.

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
3 months ago
Catalpa
Catalpa
3 months ago

@Surplus

There’s a couple of options. One, it’s possible that Instacart isn’t operating in your town, and that’s why it doesn’t consider your postal code valid. Try calling or googling the grocery retailers in your town to see what service they have for deliveries. It might not be operating through instacart, maybe there’s a different service?

If Instacart is in your town, and the app is what’s giving you a hard time, you could try ordering through the browser, maybe that will work better.

Alternatively, it seems like it asks for a postal code to determine your general location. You could try putting in a different, nearby postal code and see if that works better. You may be able to change the postal code to be delivered to once you get past the initial screen.

And finally, again, you are not being targeted. You need to get some mental health assistance, because what you’re saying makes me really worried for you.

Please, please, please, before you decide to “quit” this game, at least try giving a crisis line a call.

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
3 months ago

@Catalpa:

One, it’s possible that Instacart isn’t operating in your town, and that’s why it doesn’t consider your postal code valid.

“Isn’t operating in my town”? That’s not even permissible. The granularity of online services, when it’s not “worldwide”, is supposed to be countries, or states and provinces.

Try calling or googling the grocery retailers in your town to see what service they have for deliveries. It might not be operating through instacart, maybe there’s a different service?

Their websites all suggest using Instacart.

If Instacart is in your town, and the app is what’s giving you a hard time, you could try ordering through the browser, maybe that will work better.

I figure it’s much safer to put things like credit card numbers into a phone or other “walled garden” device that’s unrooted and hasn’t had anything sideloaded on it than into a PC.

Alternatively, it seems like it asks for a postal code to determine your general location. You could try putting in a different, nearby postal code and see if that works better. You may be able to change the postal code to be delivered to once you get past the initial screen.

An interesting suggestion. Unfortunately I don’t know of other nearby postal codes. They aren’t like GPS coordinates. There’s no algorithmic way to determine the adjacent ones. There are huge numbering discontinuities along provincial and municipal political boundaries and even along certain lines within individual cities.

And finally, again, you are not being targeted. You need to get some mental health assistance, because what you’re saying makes me really worried for you.

People keep saying that, and yet my actual experience of trying to get even very simple and basic tasks done, such as getting food into my pantry, seems suspiciously like a video game. Instead of being the same over time, every time I beat one level the next one seems to be even harder. Now why would that be, unless it actually is a video game? Oh, sure, a while back getting groceries was a near-changeless routine … at a time when keeping my meds going was behaving like a video game, with each level (month’s worth of prescription filled) harder than the previous one. And before that it was something else, and before that, something else.

If you have some other explanation for these observational data, by all means, do suggest one. But my experience leads me to predict that I’ll run into even more obstacles that are not a part of a normal person’s experience, rather than have a normal person’s experience, next week. Your “nobody is out to get you, you’ve just had a run of bad luck” hypothesis predicts that I will have a normal person’s experience next week. In a week, I suppose, we shall see who was right.

And if it was me, I think we should then find a disused thread or something and discuss what the hell might actually be going on that would explain this pattern of events in my life, and how I might combat its cause before it gets to the point of my facing the GAME OVER screen. If, of course, that hasn’t already happened by then …

Catalpa
Catalpa
3 months ago

The granularity of online services, when it’s not “worldwide”, is supposed to be countries, or states and provinces.

I don’t mean the online portion of the service, I mean the physical portion of the service. It’s possible that Instacart doesn’t do deliveries in your area.

Their websites all suggest using Instacart.

I assume these are big box stores like Sobey’s, they’re giving you generic info. It’s possible that the locations in your area don’t use Instacart. You may want to call them and ask what delivery services they offer.

I figure it’s much safer to put things like credit card numbers into a phone or other “walled garden” device that’s unrooted and hasn’t had anything sideloaded on it than into a PC.

So access the browser ordering through your phone? You might have to select the “show desktop site” option, but you should be able to do it that way.

Unfortunately I don’t know of other nearby postal codes.

Google maps shows postal codes. Just select a building nearby and it should give you something to try.

Now why would that be, unless it actually is a video game?

I am not trained or equipped to talk you down from delusions like this. You need a mental health professional.

Shadowplay
3 months ago

Unfortunately I don’t know of other nearby postal codes. They aren’t like GPS coordinates. There’s no algorithmic way to determine the adjacent ones.

Pick your closest store – doesn’t matter what it sells. Or library, if that’s closer. Or the nearest copshop. Look it up online. It will have a physical address somewhere on the contact details, including the postcode.

And a possibly silly suggestion – you are using Instacart’s Canadian hub, right? The US sites pitch a total fit at civilised letter/number postcodes.

Lainy
Lainy
3 months ago

Surplus

I am someone who was convinced that my dead friend who died of cancer was sitting at my bed side whispering to me ever night. I was having delusions. They felt so real. I could hear her, I could feel her, I could see her, I could smell that overwhelming sterile smell of a hospital that she was always covered in towards the end. Even though I knew my friend would never tell me to hurt myself or to join her, it felt real. But it wasn’t. She was dead, her ghost wasn’t haunting me. And took medical professionals to help me with this. You are having a delusion. You might not be seeing a dead love one who is telling you people are after you, but you are having common delusion and paranoia. I can’t help you. No one here can help you. You need to seek help. It’s not real no matter how real it feels. There are people that will help you see that.

Aaron
Aaron
3 months ago

Surplus, you need to speak to a mental health professional. I know I’m just repeating what others have said, but it needs to be repeated. No one on here is able to help you, beyond telling you that you need to speak to a mental health professional. If you won’t do that, there’s nothing more I can offer, because I am not going to engage with your delusions.

Naglfar
Naglfar
3 months ago

@Surplus

Unfortunately I don’t know of other nearby postal codes. They aren’t like GPS coordinates. There’s no algorithmic way to determine the adjacent ones. There are huge numbering discontinuities along provincial and municipal political boundaries and even along certain lines within individual cities.

What part of Ontario do you live in? Try searching for a postal code map for your code and the surrounding ones. I wish I could give more specific instructions but I don’t know much about how postal codes work in Canada and I’ve never been to Ontario.

If you have some other explanation for these observational data, by all means, do suggest one.

You seem to be predicting some sort of conspiracy that doesn’t exist. You’ve taken observations and sensed a pattern where there is none, which is common for people to do. However, it is just that: a pattern that isn’t there. I wish I could help but I don’t know what more to say.

Moogue
Moogue
3 months ago

@Surplus

People keep saying that, and yet my actual experience of trying to get even very simple and basic tasks done, such as getting food into my pantry, seems suspiciously like a video game.

Brains lie, they make connections where none exist, and ect. Especially if you’re off your meds, everything in your brain could just be firing at a level 10 all at once. Hence why even “simple” tasks seem so weird and off.

I don’t know what meds you are on, but if you’re having trouble getting them, have you considered/inquired whether there are longer acting versions that could be injected on a periodic basis? For example, I know that abilify has a version that can be injected in a doctor’s office every month, sometimes every two. You may have to be hospitalized for a short time to begin with to get the drug level stable in your bloodstream, but trust me, walking into a crisis center and asking for help can be the bravest, best thing to restart your life.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
3 months ago

@Surplus

Your “nobody is out to get you, you’ve just had a run of bad luck” hypothesis predicts that I will have a normal person’s experience next week.

That’s not what anyone predicts. Nobody is out to get you, but you have a series of disadvantages that are atypical, therefore it is no surprise when you have an atypically difficult experience. When I run out of food, I drive to the store and use my credit card to remedy that, and later pay my credit card off with funds obtained from employment. You don’t have that same experience because you don’t have a car, you didn’t have a credit card until just now, and your income is much more limited than mine. I wouldn’t expect you to have the same experience as I do, given how different our lives are.

I’m not sure what your goal is in posting a thinly-veiled suicide threat on a public board where people obviously care about you, but I think it would be better served by contacting a professional who knows how to help you. Nobody here is your therapist and nobody here can help you. Nobody here has the tools to be capable of helping you. You need to contact someone who does.

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
3 months ago

I previously wrote:

If you have some other explanation for these observational data, by all means, do suggest one. But my experience leads me to predict that I’ll run into even more obstacles that are not a part of a normal person’s experience, rather than have a normal person’s experience, next week. Your “nobody is out to get you, you’ve just had a run of bad luck” hypothesis predicts that I will have a normal person’s experience next week. In a week, I suppose, we shall see who was right.

Unfortunately, but unsurprisingly, I wasn’t wrong.

Next steps? (An admission that it’s not paranoia when they really are out to get me would be a nice start…)

Naglfar
Naglfar
3 months ago

@Surplus

An admission that it’s not paranoia when they really are out to get me would be a nice start…

Nobody.
Is.
Out.
To.
Get.
You.

You need to seek professional help. I can’t give you any more.

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
3 months ago

You need to seek professional help.

I’ve been hearing that, on and off, for virtually my entire life, and yet I’m the one whose world-model is accurately predicting reality, and has recently done so again. Funny how that works.

Catalpa
Catalpa
3 months ago

Your way of confirming the model of the world you have in your head is by applying your own observations to it. Can you not see how that may be a biased way of viewing the data?

For example, incels loudly proclaim that women are worthless, evil, shallow bitches who should be treated like cattle, and the failings of women are the reason why they cannot seem to form a meaningful connection to any women. And they keep failing at making any connection with women, therefore their hypothesis that women are subhuman foids must be correct, since their model correctly predicted the outcome.

Does this seem like sound reasoning? The model predicted the results, therefore it must be correct, right?

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
3 months ago

Your insulting comparison fails because there is nothing in my attitude, beliefs, or similarly that could be causing businesses to collude to refuse to offer any delivery services in my area, let alone that could be causing a software bug in a smartphone app.

Incels are the authors of their own misfortunes, vis-a-vis social rejection at least.

I am not, plausibly, the reason for the problems I am having. Unless you’re suggesting that a company would black out an entire zipcode from their app just to block 1 person they decided was “obnoxious”, in advance of ever having met or interacted with that person … in which case, I’ve won, as you are now agreeing with the position that I am being singled out for special difficulties and we’re only disagreeing about my enemies’ motives.

On the other hand if you disagree that the company in question did such a thing then you must abandon your incel comparison.

Which is it to be?

Naglfar
Naglfar
3 months ago

@Surplus
Your attitude is causing you to not seek help. Any time anyone offers help you shout them down with why it won’t work and how the world is against you.

I am not, plausibly, the reason for the problems I am having.

You are not the reason for the problem, but you are choosing not to seek help.

you are now agreeing with the position that I am being singled out for special difficulties and we’re only disagreeing about my enemies’ motives.

I don’t think that’s what Catalpa meant. I don’t know for sure because I’m not Catalpa, and she can clarify if desired, but it seemed like she was trying to say that you are refusing to seek help or listen when people try to help you, but then blame everyone else. You are not being singled out.

contrapangloss
contrapangloss
3 months ago

Possible scenarios:

A) A smartphone app developer finds a bug pertaining to an area code. Because it is limited in total number of users affected, they rank it low on the ‘to fix’ priority list in order to focus on larger metropoli.

B) A smartphone app developer custom designs a bug to screw one person in particular over. They do not know who this particular person is, but screw that person in particular.

Surplus, I feel for you. I too have had my brain-weasels try to tell me that I was particularly dislikable and that I was incapable of changing the suckiness of my life.

The brain weasels lied. Like liars.

I know you can’t (won’t) believe that there isn’t a massive conspiracy against you and that your life is hellishly difficult.

But the truth is you are not alone.

Call a local crisis line. Ask them for advice on low income transportation options.

Tell them you have been having difficulties with hopelessness. Try not to shoot down all options right away. Give them a chance to help you figure out how to make it work.

I do not live where you live. I cannot do your legwork for you or carry your burdens, even if I’d like to.

Catalpa
Catalpa
3 months ago

I’m not arguing that you’re at fault for your struggles. I’m merely using the incel comparison to illustrate how confirmation bias can warp a person’s perception and provide support for a false hypothesis. Just because a prediction seems correct, that doesn’t means that the logic that preceded that prediction is correct.

You believe that someone is specifically out to cause you pain, and therefore you consider any misfortune you meet with to be a sign of that targeting of you specifically, even technological issues that have been been demonstrably shown to affect other people. Even power outages that impact entire neighborhoods. Even medicine recalls that impact thousands of different people with the same prescription. And so on. Every bad thing is proof to you, and there’s no inverse proof you’ll accept. If something bad doesn’t happen to you, you don’t notice it, because, well, it didn’t happen. And there’s no way to “disprove” that you’re being targeted, because you can’t prove a negative. I can’t prove that there isn’t a celestial teapot out in space somewhere.

It might be comforting to think that there’s some shadowy cabal of people out to specifically ruin your life, because that gives some meaning to the shit you have to wade through. There’s someone to blame, someone that could be stopped if you could only track them down. It’s the same reason why people are drawn to conspiracy theories like the Illuminati or the lizard people controlling the world. It’s easy answers. But they’re wrong answers.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
3 months ago

@Surplus

I notice that you completely ignored my explanation for why “ordinary person difficulty” and “Surplus difficulty” are different. I guess it didn’t fit with the worldview that some cosmic force is aligned against you?

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
3 months ago

@Naglfar:

Your attitude is causing you to not seek help. Any time anyone offers help you shout them down with why it won’t work and how the world is against you.

First of all, I have actually tried many of the things people have previously suggested here. With a 100% failure rate. Here is just a sampling of the things that were suggested here, that I did try, and that didn’t work:

* HealthCareConnect
* Get a low-limit credit card and use Instacart
* Check websites of stores with locations in my area for delivery options

As for the things I haven’t tried, most of them have been obvious nonstarters, either physically beyond my capabilities (e.g. impossible without a car) or clearly not-going-to-work. The suggestion that I get therapy, for example, that is a) way outside of my budget, b) not to my knowledge covered by provincial health plans in Canada, and c) not plausibly going to magically fill my pantry even if I did splurge on some.

Most of the problems I have could be solved by about $500 extra per month and the use of a car, even just once-a-week, actually.

Unfortunately I can’t just magically conjure those things up by sufficient “positive thinking”, and being talked into being perfectly happy to be under constant threat of starvation and increasingly exhausted when I am returning from trips into town doesn’t strike me as all that worthwhile. That’d be like responding to a profusely bleeding stab wound with painkillers alone and not worrying about actually doing anything to stop the bleeding before the blood loss became fatal, I expect.

@Contrapangloss:

larger metropoli.

Unaffordable rent.

Call a local crisis line.

Do they deliver groceries?

I cannot do your legwork for you or carry your burdens, even if I’d like to.

I’ve already done enough legwork to earn this-having-been-solved three times over, by my estimate. I am tired of trying things and those things not working. What I have learned from all of this is that when IT is dead-set against my having/doing something, then all of the effort in the world to get/do that thing on my part will be futile. Every move I make will either inexplicably fail, or will work for only a short time and then a countermove will be made (remember the ranitidine saga?) after a week or so. (And if I’m just imagining this and paranoid … then who was sitting across from me making those countermoves on the chessboard? The countermoves themselves indubitably happened. If there’s no opponent sat across from me then where did the countermoves originate? By what mechanism were they selected and played on that board? They can’t have just happened spontaneously. We’re not talking subatomic particles here.)

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
3 months ago

Most of the problems I have could be solved by about $500 extra per month and the use of a car, even just once-a-week, actually.

And you’re hardly uniquely in this situation.

You know, if I were without a car and unable to afford Uber, but I lived in a city of any size whatsoever, I would call 211 or the local equivalent and have absolute faith that there is a ride-sharing program specifically for low-income individuals who live in a food desert. Because that’s not a problem unique to you. Lots of people are in the same boat. Tens of thousands in my city alone. There are programs to help people exactly like you, but if you don’t reach out and you slap the hands of everyone who tries to guide you to do that, then you are unhelpable.

People tell you to get therapy not because it will put food in your kitchen, but because you are clearly mentally unwell with your paranoia and conviction that some powerful force is working against you. That’s not a nice way to live, and you shouldn’t have to live that way, which is why therapy is recommended. To put food in your kitchen, you need to connect yourself with the programs in place that would do that. To stop having to live in fear of imaginary forces, you need therapy and possibly medication. But both of these things rely on you to do stuff, instead of crying into the void and then pessimistically shooting down every idea everyone else has.

contrapangloss
contrapangloss
3 months ago

Surplus, I cannot help you. There may be a local food bank that does delivery who can. You know who might know if the local food bank could deliver?

A crisis line or center.

My two scenarios were NOT to convince you to move to a larger metro. It was an example of how your predicament is not unique and is not inexplicable. They’re even somewhat universal among smaller towns, like where I grew up.

I know there’s no way for me to prove it to you, but there is no conspiracy.

I cannot help you with your pantry or your paranoia. I hope you encounter someone who can.

Edited to add: POM said it nicer, so what they said. I feel for you, and want you to not be hungry and in mental anguish, but there’s nothing more I can say here that we haven’t already been said.