By David Futrelle
Andrew Anglin of the Daily Stormer is giving out sex tips now, and they are pretty dire. He begins a recent lengthy disquisition on the subject by informing his male readers that, no, women can’t be good at sex — and that as far as he’s concerned the very notion of “good sex” is “absolute boomer tripe.”
It only gets worse from there.
I hear men talking about how “good in bed” a woman is and I’m like “wow so I guess she was really squirming around a lot, huh?”
Hey, squirming is good.
The only measure of “good” or “bad” sex is the physical fitness of the couple – much more so the man, because he is going to be the one exerting 95% of the energy.
Uh, what about, say, those positions in which the woman is doing the most work?
This modern “woman on top” style sex is just a disgusting porno myth and actually you can basically never get proper motions in that position.
I think a lot of people are going to have to disagree with you on this one, bub.
More importantly, having a woman “in control” on top of you like that is vile and degrading. No man should ever subject himself to being underneath a woman during the act of copulation. It’s virtually on the level of cunnilingus, and at that point, you might as well just let her peg you with a strap-on. …
Allowing a woman to “take the reins” by being on top is humiliating and emasculating. It basically creates a situation where you are the woman. Women don’t respect this.
Apparently there’s only one proper kind of sex, in Anglin’s world, and — somewhat surprisingly — it isn’t missionary position.
The ideal and appropriate position is to have her on all fours, and to enter from behind.
At least that way you don’t have to see the disappointed look in her face, I guess.
This is also the natural position of human mating, given that beds did not used to exist.
Huh? You can fuck all sorts of ways without a bed. Nazis have such severely limited imaginations.
As you have probably noticed, Anglin doesn’t seem much interested in women’s pleasure — and in fact he thinks the more a man pays attention to what his partner wants, the worse it will be for both of them. Anglin suggests, rather, that everyone will be the happiest if the man is completely selfish.
If you are exclusively concerned about your own enjoyment, this will lead to her having a higher opinion of you, because you aren’t acting like her servant. …
[M]en should never, ever stoop to thinking about how much a woman enjoys sex. If you do that, you are like some pathetic little dog. No woman respects that.
The only way straight women will ever be fully satisfied, Anglin asserts, is if their partners start slapping them around. You see, he’s under the impression that all women secretly (or not-so-secretly) want all sex to be rough sex with a lot of slapping and choking and name-calling.
Here’s the truth about what is considered “good sex” for a woman: every single woman just wants to be slapped and choked during sex. That is what women crave more than anything. That is what she will compliment you on, that is what will make her obsessed with you and keep texting you compulsively afterward.
Well, sure, some women are into this, just as some guys are. People are into all sorts of things. Some like rough sex, some like gentle sex, some like sex in which both partners are dressed like sexy pokemons. The key thing is to be on the same page with your partner. Going into a sexual encounter with a new partner assuming that every women is into choking and slapping is a recipe for disaster.
I’ve even heard tell that literal hookers will ask you to choke them, if you’re a muscly and aloof young guy, and they want to use the opportunity of you paying them for sex to act out their own sex fantasies on you in-between business sessions with old men.
I’m pretty sure sex workers are mostly interested in getting the sex over with as efficiently and safely as possible, even when their clients are “muscly and aloof young guys.” Choking is dangerous to begin with; having some stranger do it to you is risky in the extreme.
Not that he’s advocating giving in to women’s “vile” and “debased” desires.
Just so you understand: I am not encouraging anyone to do these sick BDSM type acts with a woman, ever. She will enjoy it, but you will feel dirty afterward, and that may stay with you for a long time.
Nah.. It’s reading the Daily Stormer that makes me feel dirty for a long, long time.
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@Lukas Xavier
Well, I don’t think Little Nazi Andy is very bright. He probably couldn’t figure out sex positions other than the one he knows.
As far as I remember it, there where arguments for more cunnilingus (yum) by feminists who worship the clitoris (and sometimes go too far, into trans exclusive territory), arguments from straights and queers of all descriptions for the controversial act of anal play which involves stimulation of the prostate or cafab anatomy of similar function (I’m a little torn on the issue but I like good anal sex), arguments from very rare people like me for specialized acts that satisfy special constraints (e.g. not involving ones partners genitalia or secondary sex organs) …and that’s not including weirdos like me who actively wish for a little pain to accompany the joy.
CN: German psychology, transphobia, bi/pan/ace-phobia, transmisia, abuse and the trauma afterwards
The problem is that on the outer fringes of this giant cluster of human sexuality there exists a lot of abuse and the borders can be slippery if you don’t spend the time to ensure informed, ongoing, enthusiastic and actual consent (e.g. no partners under age, too traumatized to consent or to overwhelmed by the situation) horrible things happen. I had this happen to me and consider myself quite good at knowing my limits. Still, a threat of death trough not getting my hormones at the time until I proved my heterosexuality made me do a lot of things I regretted. I rationalized the hell out of this only to realize that the only thing I was doing was to avoid the label of victim to avoid further victimization. This made me quite cynical and makes it hard to talk to others at the moment. I hope I get better soon. Anyway, sex can be fun and no sex with cops (or, of course nazis or, less bad really mean people in general) is a good rule to live by.
OT: Some of you may have already seen this, but if not it’s definitely worth a read. TW for discussion of sexual assault.
https://www.currentaffairs.org/2020/03/everything-has-changed-overnight
In Graham Linehan’s case, one might be tempted to make an exception – given that in UKnian to “nut” somebody means to smash one’s forehead into their face (aka a “Glasgow kiss”).
@opposablethumbs
Even then, my point stands that one shouldn’t sleep with TERFs. Or Nazis, or any other hate group for that matter.
Another reason not to have sex with TERFs is it seems like a significant number of TERF women are political lesbians, and IIRC most lesbians and bisexual women do not like political lesbians much.
@Naglfar, absolutely!
I have seen enough porn to know that people can do it basically anywhere. Some the places and positions look so uncomfortable that it kills any sexiness the scene might have because I’m too busy worrying about the performers, but they’re still doin’ it.
(For a while there was a “shoot in exotic outdoor locations” trend that included, I kid you not, doin’ it right on top of lava rocks. Yes, the jagged kind. No blanket even.)
My understanding is that, given the way the modern sex industry works, sex workers are less interested in “getting the sex over with” than with pleasing the client so that they can get more work in the future, both with repeat business and good reviews. (Seriously, there’s a whole “review culture” thing online and it’s weird.)
Wow.
That’s bad.
Terrible.
I mainly want to laugh at Anglin’s ridiculous claims. Clearly he has never had good sex and I feel very sorry for any of his partners.
@Allandrel
My back hurts just thinking about that. I have enough skin problems on my back, I don’t need more irritation.
That reminds me of this analysis of 5,000 reviews of British sex workers. Is that what you are referring to?
@Naglfar
I only researched the American side of this, but yes, what I found matched up with the article’s assessment of the UK. It really is like a whole subculture, complete with jargon that requires a glossary. I was honestly reminded of one of my own subcultures (toy collecting).
Following on this, a question for other autistic folks here: We all know the stereotype of “autistic special interests.” Do you find that you have one or two overwhelming special interests, to the exclusion of others?
Because my experience has been that while I have certain evergreen special interests (tabletop games, movies, toys) I also have an every-changing array of “flavor of the month” interests where I will study something exhaustively for a while and then move on to something else.
There was a period where it went “Gothic Literature -> inner workings of the porn industry -> short-lived toy-based cartoons from the 80s.”
Taking sex tips from Andrew Anglin is like taking wine recommendations from an 8 year old.
David, that’s disgusting.
The plural of “pokémon” is “pokémon,” not “pokémons.” Don’t go spreading your sick filth around.
@Allandrel: my special interests change every few months, much like yours.
@Allandrel
My experience is similar. I do have some perpetual interests (music, mathematics, cetaceans, and others) and I have some which change from time to time only to resurface in a new form a long time later (aviation, Greenland, classic cars, etc).
re: autistic special interests
My first was “reading things in general”, which sure set me up for a ride. I never quite lose anything, but since I was ten or so: the MOTHER series, Homestuck, Don’t Starve, and now a latecomer to Danganronpa.
That said, Nintendo stuff in general is a consistent background element, with Pikmin being what set it all off.
Damn, Andy sure sounds like one tight-assed, insecure little prude, on top of being a pedestrian misogynist and Nazi.
OK, the following may stray into TMI territory, but Mr. Dormousing_it very often requests me to be on top. It gives him a break. Practically speaking, when people are no longer young , certain positions are physically easier. He’s 12 years older than I am.
He’s (probably unknowingly) recreated the basic premise of the Anti-Sex League from “Nineteen Eighty-Four”. They promoted intercourse for the purpose of procreation but sought to eliminate the orgasm.
@special interests
Yeah same here, I have a few things that I get obsessed with for years at a time and an ever rotating list of stuff I get into for shorter periods. The former is mostly real world stuff related to history (Imperial China, The Cathars, and now Medical History) or animals (conservation, ice aged megafauna and now Fancy Rats*), the later some specific creator of fiction that I get into (Discworld, Studio Ghibli, A:tla/korra, right now Kim Stanley Robinson).
*I’m seriously thinking of getting some as a pet, I mean look at this
I think the fluctuating specific interests are pretty common. They’re called hyperfixations in people with ADHD, and there’s generally a lot of overlap of that condition and autism. I generally leapfrog from one hyperfixation to the next.
I find that position extremely uncomfortable, sometimes very painful.
Good thing I’ll most definitely never have sex with Andy.
BTW, Andy, have you learned about West Virginia yet?
My brother in a lot of ways doesn’t fit into the stereotypes of autism, but in the special interests category, absolutely. He knows all the fire stations in the area, he’s really into giraffes, he’s obsessed with Mr. Belding from Saved By The Bell. Sometimes I wonder if I am on the spectrum and was never diagnosed because diagnostic criteria was stricter in the 80’s because I’m kind of the same way. I do the same jigsaw puzzles over and over, I watch the same old gymnastics meets on YouTube over and over, I’ve watch Buffy over and over, etc. In fact, I went through this phase as a teen where I’d acquire a bunch of beads and then instead of making jewelry with them, I’d mix them up and reorganize them again and again and my mom got so frustrated with it that she shouted “do I have two autistic children, now?” It did make me wonder, particularly since I’m uncomfortable with eye contact. Ultimately I don’t know if it matters or not if I were to call myself autistic. I just..am who I am?
@Buttercup Q. Skullpants
An 8-year-old who hates wine, wine bottles, the corks in the wine bottles, wine glasses, and people.
@WWTH
That’s a definite possibility. Since I’m not a
medical professional I can’t diagnose you, but it’s definitely possible, seeing as a lot of autistic women are misdiagnosed or undiagnosed as children then find out much later. In addition, people with autistic siblings are much more likely to be autistic.
Can relate.
Anyway, I was diagnosed as a child, so I’m not really sure how one gets a diagnosis as an adult. Any autistic folks here have any advice about getting diagnosed as adults?
@wwth
Sounds autistic to me. Not a professional but I am a late diagnosed AFAB person. I’ve been reading about it. A lot. Autism, the presentation of, differences, possible causes. Etc. Lots of autistic people (undiagnosed) in my family. Its mostly genetic, as I’m sure you know.
I’m not sure where you are WWTH, so I can’t tell you how to get diagnosed or assessed where you are. In the UK the Autism Act 2009 every NHS area has to have a service for autistic adults. You either go through your GP or straight to the adult Autism service. I understand in the US it’s more complicated and in Australia it can be hard but is possible. I am regrettably ignorant with regards to the rest of the world, since I only know UK, USian and Australian auties. Well, a couple of Dutchies too, but we’ve never discussed their diagnostic system.
My general advice would be to use the diagnostic system to your advantage by making notes against the criteria, eg memories or things you do that match the criteria. Present to your primary care practitioner and say this is why you believe that you are autistic and wand assessed. And keep asking til they give in.
@special interests convo.
Yep, sounds right to me. I have long standing interests, like fantasy fiction, and book collection in general. My dad and uncle taught me gardening as a child and that still fascinates me. I also collect dragons.
And I have fluctuations in interests. Like crafts. Because of my fluctuations I have sewing, embroidery, cross-stitch and crochet stuff all over the house. I have also collected a random load of information due to interests popping up for a few months to a year then being replaced by another. My current one is autism, before that it was crime fiction, and before that women and queenship in Anglo Saxon England. Sometimes they cross over.
@An Autistic Giraffe
Rats are Good People. Two main points of advice if you do get some:
1) Never ever have just one rat. They are VERY social creatures and get very depressed if left alone.
2) Fancy rats WILL get tumors, and may have to be euthanized. So think about how good you are with putting down pets after just two years or so.
@WWTH
I was diagnosed at 32 because I started seeing a therapist and after about two months she recommended that I get tested, and gave me a referral. Don’t know how that might apply in your situation.
Nazi’s seem to be completely joyless. Hardly a new observation, I know. It’s like extra-toxic masculinity on steroids. The only emotions allowed are hate, anger and occasional triumph. Oh, and schadefreude, but that’s the hate again.
I mean, we all have fits of
but they seem to live like that 24/7. I’d feel sorry for them if they didn’t cause so much misery to others.