By David Futrelle
We like to think we can defeat almost any national trauma by remembering to “Keep Calm and Carry On,” as the popular poster declares.
It’s no accident that the poster, originally produced (if not widely deployed) in pre-war Britain in 1939 had a second and much bigger life in the US in the wake of 9/11, when we were routinely exhorted to keep going to restaurants and bars and theaters lest our social cowardice prove that “the terrorists have won.” (And there was some logic to this argument: the point of terrorism is to terrorize, so by resisting our fears and “carrying on” as normally as we could we lessened the impact of the attacks.)
But we now live in a world where this comforting fantasy no longer applies, where the health of our older and immunocompromised citizens depends on us changing our habitual behavior radically. Social Distancing is hard both practically and psychologically, especially in the US, where it challenges Americans raised on an ideology of rugged individualism to adapt a lifestyle that seems decidedly unheroic – and, for those who are young and healthy, to do it for the sake of others rather than for themselves.
So it’s not surprising that there are still people out there who still think the bravest response to the coronavirus is to refuse to change at all. Think of those who filled the bars and restaurants this past weekend – in Chicago there were long lines of St Patrick’s Day revelers outside the bars in Wrigleyville. Think of Devin Nunes, tut-tutting those too “scared” to go out and suggesting that visiting the local pub was the best thing people could do for our economy.
“I’m not afraid to go out and do what I want,” wrote a Twitterer called Lucky Tony.
In my world, it is … a necessity to go out and have a good time at my local bar and not be stuck at home cause of some ‘virus’ that scares you.
Now that bars and restaurants in many locales have been forced to close their doors to customers by decree – in part because of the terrible decisions people like Tony made over the last weekend – there are some calling for some sort of “resistance” to the closures. “It is now evident that this is an orchestrated attempt to destroy CAPITALISM,” tweeted the cowboy-hatted former sherriff and MAGA ideologue David A Clarke Jr.
First sports then schools and finally commercial businesses. Time to RISE UP and push back. Bars and restaurants should defy the order. Let people decide if they want to go out.
Or stay home and get delivery until the crisis passes. Is that really too much to bear?
Going out won’t help us defeat this enemy; it will enable the virus to do more damage. Hitting the bars isn’t an act of courage; it’s an act of selfishness that puts more vulnerable others at risk. Keeping calm is well and good, but carrying on as normal, well, that’s just what the virus wants us to do.
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I’m sorry. Please talk to me. I fell off the wagon with a resounding crash. Won’t let it make me be more stupid by driving dui or spreading sickness.
@ dreamer
If you’re talking about what I think you are, then you don’t need to be saying sorry. Relapse is really common in rehabilitation. It’s not something to beat yourself up about; it’s part of the process. There can be all sorts of mis-steps and diversions on any journey. They key thing is to not let them stop you travelling. But it’s not a race; you don’t lose anything just because it might have taken you a bit longer than you anticipated.
Thank you Alan. It’s kind of stupid but work kept me from falling off the wagon. Now I’m hardly working and time off = drink all I want. The only good side is no one but me is endangered. Stay safe and healthy. Me? Cheers?! I was thinking I needed I a vacation but not like this. I usually spend vacation with family which stops me from being stupid. The good? thing is I’m low income so I won’t trade alcohol for food.
@Lainy
Best wishes.
@Dreamer
What Alan said. Fall down seven times, get up eight. It’s always hard to beat addictions. I find it’s best to keep occupied, by exercise if nothing else, at all times to reduce the ability to fixate on the desire. But it’s a rough slog anyway, best of luck picking yourself up now.
@Lainy
I absolutely assure you that your professors are no happier with that situation than you are. Write them an email explaining your lack of internet and asking for consideration. They will give it to you. A friend of mine is refusing to even hold zoom classes for that very reason: she thinks some of her students may not be able to connect to the internet on anything but their phones, and is going for low-bandwidth instruction.
As for the living situation: does the military provide no accommodations or help for the families of servicemen? Is there no organization to which you could apply for help? (There may not be, I am merely trying to provide another line of possible inquiry if you have not considered it.)
@Lainy
I currently live with my parents, after a flat I owned ended in disaster (I also had to do the “you have two weeks to move” thing). And I’ve also just been told my biology degree will be taught online for the rest of the semester.
I’m now working from home, as I am immune suppressed and my employer does not want me in. I appreciate the thought – and I’m not arguing – but it is playing hell with my mental health; I suffer from anxiety disorder, and the world in general is giving me panic attacks right now. One of the ways I dealt with that was my routine (work, gym, friends) none of which are currently available.
On the funny side, I went to the doctor for Valium to control my panic attacks. Normally they say “you can have six, they’re very addictive, we’re monitoring your usage” and this time they said: “that’s totally understandable and we know you’re responsible with them, here’s 28 and come back if you need more.” This did make me chuckle a bit.
I can’t really offer you any comfort; I’m half a world away and we don’t know each other in real life. However, we’re in the same boat, and I feel for you. Take care of yourself. I don’t know if it might help if I say that my move was absolutely awful but I did it, recovered from it, and put my life back together? I’m sure you can do the same. You strike me as a strong person.
@everyone
I’ve changed my mind about some of the things I said in the other thread, and I am feeling increasingly bad about making those comments. At the time I was expressing my honest opinion about the best way to deal with the crisis but, with further information, my opinion’s changed. And – hard as it is to do a climb down – I need to register that. I was wrong about the severity of this crisis.
I think we are all just going to have to get through this as best we can, and one way or another it’s going to be pretty horrific. Take care of yourselves, everyone.
I think the worse horror won’t be the pandemic itself, but all the wankers trying to profit from it. Price gougers, various profiteers, firms trying to get rid of you or putting you even more in dependency, governement trying to use the distraction to pass off some questionable shit, that kind of thing.
@Lainy
That sucks. I hope good luck flies to you.
@Dreamer
As the song says, everybody falls sometimes. It’s just one day. Tomorrow is another day.
@wwth
Get well soon.
@Ohlmann
This one especially is going to happen a lot. Already Republicans are trying to use this as a cover to pass legislation in the US.
@Lainy:
I’m so sorry things are super shitty for you right now. And while it won’t change your situation, please keep reminding yourself that you’re not failing. The system is failing you.
Even though Japan closed the schools to its students 3 weeks ago, teachers are still expected to work. I’ve been keeping busy because I decided to write a handbook to help Japanese elementary school teachers take over the role of primary instructor in English classes. They’re supposed to do that starting in April, and while they’ve known about it for years, the awareness of what it will entail seems to be hitting only just now. Not that I’m remotely qualified to do this, nor do I have the skills in Japanese to write it competently, but I think it will be appreciated anyway.
I also spent some time doing a training session for the teachers at my own elementary school. This was mostly loading them up with a bunch of organizational tips supplemented by concrete examples (such as a few lesson plans based on actual lessons I did and samples of self-evaluation sheets for the students, which can help teachers track their progress). After all, most of what I do to make English classes work has nothing at all to do with being a native speaker.
The structured conversation demonstration was hilarious because, just like with the students, it was very hard to get the teachers to stop talking after the timer went off. And this is a bunch of people who are convinced that their English skills are absolutely horrible! Hopefully it helps them feel more up to the task despite their doubts.
Anyway, for anyone whose mental health is taking a hit because of having to isolate or is otherwise burdened with an excess of free time, I highly recommend starting a project that will benefit other people. It’s a way of staying connected to the outside world, and you can even work with other people in real time through voice chat and video conferencing apps and so on if that’s your jam.
Creative work is great—compose some music; interview some elderly locals and write biographical profiles of them; record a radio drama; draw some cartoons; take photos and turn them into royalty-free stock images; make porn; design political infographics.
Filling in gaps in accessibility is perfect, like typing up transcripts of things that currently lack them. Offering online conversation practice to language learners kills two birds with one stone. Have any niche skills? Maybe you can do some distance consulting and troubleshooting for people in your community. Speak more than one language fluently? Do some translations.
And yeah, this is basically a suggestion to do things for free that should earn you money. But the economy is fucked anyway. As long as you find things that no one else is doing and you’re not taking paying work away from anyone, why not try to make the world a better place? Someone will benefit, and then you can both feel better.
@lainy
@wwth
Hygienic Hugs to both of you
Dang it my stepdad threatened to kick me out of the house. It’s always about my attitude and temperament.
Bio dad called me and demanded I come over to pick up health masks. After I agreed on threat of him being very pissed off he wanted to talk to my mom. I relented (big mistake) for two reasons. One my mom doesn’t like my bio dad, two my stepdad Really doesn’t like my bio dad.
When mom and bio dad talked there was a mix up of her thinking my dad wanted to sell me 20 dollar health masks. I corrected by saying “no that is not what I said. I said be bought them for 20 dollars.”
After the call was over me and stepdad were visibly aggravated from hearing my bio dad over the phone. Bio dad is very loud and possibly drunk at the time.
Stepdad gave incorrect advice after not listening to me saying “Don’t but anything from him.” In my outburst I said “I’m. Broke.”
Stepdad decided the best move was the threaten me with kicking me out. Afterwards came yet another talk about my attitude, how I picked up bad traits from my aunts and bio dad, and how I act so socially distant from them. Afterwards they couldn’t decide from continuing to lecture me or let me go back to my room.
I am so exhausted being around anyone from my family.
Lainy, I have to get back to work but I wanted to say I’m sorry for your situation. It sucks.
After I get off work I’ll see if there’s any info I can track down that might help. I work in a military town, and I know there are supposed to be financial / counseling resources availible, but don’t know enough off the top of my head to be useful.
You’ve survived everything else the world has thrown at you.
You can survive this.
But it does suck, and it is stressful, and your situation is real rough right now.
@Ooglyboggles : that seem sucky. It took less than that for me to decide to never sleep in my parent’s house without a contingency to get the fuck you immediatly if they start acting up. Of course, that’s only because the society arbitrarily decided software developpers were to be paid an excessive amount of money…*
Like for Lainy, I hope that something will allow for an healthier environment soon.
* okay, okay, not that excessive compared to various celebrities and high management. But I am unconvinced that I should be in the top 10% best paid people in my country.
I believe the reason the poster wasn’t ever really used was because it wasn’t very popular at the time: people thought it was patronizing. i guess when people are dying every day and bombs are raining down at night you don’t want the government to tell you to calm down — and you don’t want them to suggest you’re not capable of staying calm of your own volition.
@Lainy: oof, I’m sorry. 🙁
(And I was wrong about the emergency measure thing too, the ban on evictions turns out to only be for HUD housing. Sorry, all, I should have done more research.)
@Ooglyboggles: oh gods, that’s awful :/ What is it with people like us having such horrible bio-families? I can’t even imagine the level of shittiness it takes to threaten kicking their own kid out during a pandemic, JFC.
*offers virtual hugs to anyone and everyone who wants them*
Keep calm? Yes. As much as possible. Carry on? Heck no. Hunker down, friends!
On one hand, I’m in a better place than many, as I already largely worked from home. Thankful for that, at least.
On another hand, I live alone, and going out to social environments with lots of people is a big part of my life. I also haven’t had any in-person social contact for over two weeks now, and I’m kind of going through withdrawl.
The stress of this situation is apparently turning my dreams weird. Last night, I was whatever a cross between a Mary Sue and a buttmonkey would be, in a gods-can-this-get-any-more-ridiculous supernatural dark comedy.
Over the course of the dream, in order: I was adopted into a tribe of blind, cave-dwelling cannibals; was caught in a battle between old-timey gangsters and ape monsters; died; came back as a zombie; was granted the powers of a witch; had to deal with being actively avoided if not outright ostracized by other people due to giving off a creepy aura and being very sickly-looking (and also had to deal with buses ignoring any stop I was at regardless of how many people were present, and needing to clean mold off my skin)… except for a kindly old lady who was remarkably unobservant and an annoying goth girl who thought I was a vampire; drove off an incompetent hate demon; then reluctantly moved in with my adopted tribe because their only other witch decided she was tired of immortality and stepped down. At that point, what remained of the dream stopped being darkly stupid and/or comedic (and sometimes exasperating to experience) and became just dark.
@Snowberry : to me that love surrealist stories and absurd humor, that look marvelous. I wish I had dreams like that more often, or at least that I remembered them.
The peak of one of my dreams that marked me most had a maya priestess transforming in a giant were-platypus and throwing cars at me while I was fleeing. Another older one had modern society trying to adopt and educate childrens found in a jungle, before being forced to send them back here because they were too savage.
UK Govt orders closure of all pubs, restaurants, cinemas etc from tonight.
That seems fair enough, but they’ve also applied to gyms. That seems a bit short sighted. In terms of risk analysis you’d think they’d want to keep the population as fit and healthy as possible.
I think public gyms might have too much transmission risk compared to the health benefit they provide? The people who like gym excercise in the first place will likely find some way to exercise at home or outdoors.
However, shit gets really tough in terms of public health if you need to ban people from walking outdoors.
In regard to gyms – hopefully they put out information detailing exercises you can do at home, with simple things you probably have, as well as body weight exercises. Keeping people from mingling in a gym, as well as giving them one less reason to leave their house, seems like a smart idea, to me.
Closing gyms is indeed a tough one, in terms of risk vs health benefits, but understandable certainly. The local municipal gym has had hand sanitiser dispensers and alcohol-impregnated wipes dispensers getting plenty of use at least! Not going to complain, obviously, but going to miss this something ‘orrible for the sake of mental health :-s
I expect a lot of people will jog or cycle on the streets instead, and use outdoor equipment in parks if there is any – but sadly these options tend to be significantly more hostile for women; half the attraction of going to the gym is no stares, no comments, no harassment of any kind … I think this will put off many more women than men.
(Also, trainers you can actually run in on the street cost a small fortune afaik.)
No room for anything here in the matchbox-flat, but this being the top floor I’m considering carefully what might possibly be done up on the roof, in peace and quiet, preferably without actually falling off 🙂
We have a few trim trails round here; and of course just some nice walks generally.
It does seem a bit daft though closing gyms when you consider the NHS guidance for risk factors.
Must confess to being a bit peeved by this. The gym is not just a social space for me (I know that’s not allowed now) but it’s a big part of my physical and mental well-being.
(Also I use the shower to save my gas bill)