By David Futrelle
Fellas! Have you heard about this thing called a “bra?” The ladies wear them on their boobs and get this, they don’t just wear them to keep their bazoongas from going all floppy when they walk around. No, sometimes ladies use sophisticated bra technology to make their boobs look bigger than they really are! So they can hypnotize you with their big boobs … even if they don’t have big boobs!
A couple of days ago one Man Going His Own Way called end_all_wars posted a 100% medically accurate diagram of the effects of this devious technology in the MGTOW subreddit to let his colleagues know about the insidious danger of this sort of
false falsie advertising.
Terrifying, huh? These devious ladies have various boob-enhancing technologies at their disposal — from pushup bras to padded bras to chicken-cutlet-looking silicon bra inserts, which can apparently turn the tiniest of breasts into Dolly-Partonesque uberboobs. Or so say the MGTOWs who have encountered this technology in the wild.
“I got fooled a few times LOL,” wrote someone called CpuDoc67.
Nothing is worse than when you are expecting melons and you end up with two bee stings.
The experience of seeing giant balloon boobs transform into regular-sized boobs with the removal of the bra is apparently quite traumatic.
“I wouldn’t call them bee stings.” wrote TheTruthSetYouFree.
[M]ore like, bread dough before its cooked, lumpy and kind of weirdly shaped. small for sure … but so poorly formed and droopy you just want to puke. been fooled HARDCORE only once but fuck, looked like DD to a post pregnancy flappy shitty ass B cup that somehow was small and also have the gravitational effects of a J cup.
A commenter called Scaralamozzi was also quite discomboobulated the first time he witnessed a small breast reveal.
The first time i noticed how much pushup is there in a bra i was shocked. I still remember the exact moment it happened.
Another commenter was stunned to discover that even b-cup boobs are affected by the forces of gravity.
I legit had 2 young girls in their twenties with saggy b cups that I thought would be firm c-cups. Oh well, I fucked them anyways but it was weird having to hold up their tits when I grabbed them.
So weird to discover that boobs are not in fact bags of sand.
A commenter called Valor_X was rocked to his core by the mere notion of pushup bras.
When I first learned about push up bras it blew my mind
It was all a lie
Indeed. some suggested that all the things that women do to make themselves look more conventionally attractive are cruel deceptions. According to Paul_G1, these tactics
It’s the equivalent of a guy wearing 3 inch insoles and a muscle suit under his shirt with a George Clooney mask.
It’s all lies
The plastered on make up,hair extensions, the push up bras, the tights that firm up their flat asses.
Take it off it’s like wtf? What happened? Why the fuck do you look shit? Bait and switch.
It’s been accepted as normal now.
Always look at her as what she is. The raw thing. I know women that wake up 30 mins before their “bf” Just to do their makeup. The man’s never seen her real face.
I’m going to go lie down for a while to recover.
But before I go: MGTOWs and other misogynists, as you may have gathered from that last comment, also have very strong feelings about makeup in general (and lipstick in particular), which you can read about to your heart’s content in the Mammoth archives.
H/T — Reddit’s badwomensanatomy subreddit, which reposted the wonderful diagram above.
Send tips to dfutrelle at gmail dot com.
We Hunted the Mammoth relies entirely on readers like you for its survival. If you appreciate our work, please send a few bucks our way! Thanks!