By David Futrelle
From time to time, game company Hasbro gets bored and greedy and decides to perk up sales a little with a novelty version of the game Monopoly.
A couple of weeks ago, the company released Monopoly Socialism, a grim evocation of Soviet-style Communism seemingly designed to delight the Fox News crowd. Last year, they put out a similarly satirical version of Monopoly for Millennials, sans real estate, because “you can’t afford it anyway.”
Now the company has released a kind-of, sort-of feminist edition of the game — and Men’s Rights Redditors are crying “misandry.”
In Ms Monopoly, available for pre-order as of today, men get to see what it’s like to get paid less for the same work: Every time women pass “go” they collect $240, while men collect the standard $200.
Naturally, the inhabitants of the Men’s Rights subreddit — wage gap denialists all — don’t find any of this the slightest bit funny.
“That moment when you are so privileged in society that you need a leg up in a board game,” sniffed someone called Sir_Sux_Alot.
“Show boys that even when the rules are perfectly and objective fair to begin with and nothing is holding them back we still feel the need to give girls privilege over boys,” groused 5th_Law_of_Robotics.
“So they’ve taken a perfectly fair and equal game where everyone has the same chance as each other, and made it in to a sexist shit show,” lamented MrHolte.
“So when’s the new Life game come out?” asked Biff64gc.
Women getting discounted college degrees from female only scholarships and are guarenteed a stem or ceo job that pays more because of female affirmative action and men have a 90% chance of not finishing the game due to death or homlessness.
(Yes, these dudes actually believe that in the real world CEO jobs are handed out to women like candy; never mind that less than 7% of the CEOs in the Fortune 500 are women.)
“Well now I have seen it all,” mgtowjoe sighed.
The sad thing is even with 40$ more then men they will spend that one shoes and whatever other useless items that feed ego and not the common good.
Not to mention they talk about instead of properties it’s inventions that women made……. WI-FI…….. Last I heard that was an idea that was founded and proven by Tesla…..
Uh, no. Many people contributed to the invention of WiFi, including Hedy Lamarr, who is the person the game presumably celebrates.
The other invention listed was chocolate ship cookies….. Promoting the art of fattening foods to slam the idea of “healthy at any size” down our throats like a cock in a crappy porno film.
That’s … some interesting imagery there. I wouldn’t have gone directly from “chocolate ship cookies” to “cock shoved down throat” but I guess it does make for some vivid writing.
“Fuck you get woke go broke,” mgtowjoe concluded.
Someone called Ody_ssey bragged he’d beat the women at their own game.
I can guarantee I can still beat feminists in this game. The next 50% of the game is not about who had more money earlier. It becomes about decision making and probability and you need to make quick money management decisions to increase monopoly. They will complain about the game once men starts winning saying the dice is sexist.
NoButtholeNoGood, meanwhile, made the inevitable transphobic joke.
I’d just identify as female whenever I went to play this.
Hilarious.
No one tell these dudes about chess, in which the queen zooms about the board murdering opponents at will while the king stumbles around like some infomercial doofus.
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Does this actually happen in the game? It seems like an odd mechanic to implement, seeing as there was nothing like that in the original Monopoly.
Also, what does one do if they are not male or female?
Yes. If there’s one thing men consistently do it’s spend their money on the common good. I’m curious if this guy has also whined about women and video games or comics or MTG cards or [fill in hobby entitled men whine about women getting in to]…
Re:chess, I hope these clowns discover that game’s “misandrist”! I hope they find “misandry” in as many things as possible so they stay out of everyone else’s way, and devote their lives to complaining on the interwebs from their basement lairs.
I, too, can confidently say I would have won games that I never intend to play. It’s because of my great skill at confidently saying things.
Interesting way for these guys to miss the point. They’re whining about it being unfair and sexist for them to get paid less in this board game when it’s supposed to illustrate how the wage gap is sexist and unfair.
Tabby Lavalamp, don’t forget cases of beer and pay per view porn. Good investments there.
Omg Dave,
I almost peed myself with your “dont show the boys chess” bit!
Thank you for always making me smile!
Found this on Freethought Blogs… Blogger is CripDyke, don’t know if it’s tho one from here….
With apologies to Rogers N Hammerstein….
He’s got a favorite word, it’s “Me!”
His list of values starts with Greed.
He grabs any woman’s ass
Thinks gold leaf equals class
And underneath his toupee
you’ll find half an idea per day
He loves the bible so much he made a golden calf!
He never shows up for briefings
His intellect is surreal
He’s always insulting or grifting
Save when you bring the child his Happy Meal™!
I hate to have to say it
But I very firmly feel
The Donald’s not an asset to the world…
Gorka and Miller still think he’s good,
and looks fine in a starched white hood!
Oh…
How do you solve a problem like The Donald?
How do you catch a lie and pin it down?
How should a journalist describe The Donald?
A snowflake with Alzheimers! A white supremacist clown!
Many a thing you know you’d like to tell him
Many a thing he ought to understand
But how do you make him stay
And hear what the experts say?
How do you keep a wave upon the sand?
Oh, how do you solve a problem like The Donald
Who has to point out his brain’s existence with his hand?
At his pressers he’s confused,
Out of focus and bemused,
And always seems about to nuke Iran!
Unpredictable as weather
He’s as flighty as a feather
He’s demented! He’s deficient! A con man!
He appeases the fascists!
Role models for sadists
He out-narcissists Narcissus!
He is boastful! He is mean!
He’s mendacious! He’s obscene!
And he thinks he can give orders
to the world!
How do you solve a problem like The Donald?
How do you catch a lie and pin it down?
How should a journalist describe The Donald?
A snowflake with Alzheimers! A white supremacist clown!
Many a thing you know you’d like to tell him;
Many his marbles lost that must be found.
But how do you make him stay
And hear what the experts say
When he’s convinced his navel lint is profound?
Oh, how do you solve a problem like The Donald?
Impeach him and burn his government to the ground!
@Katherine, Tabby
Other great investments the MRAs make include Axe body spray, pickup artist courses, sex dolls (and bots when they become available), and fake documentaries (i.e. The Sarkeesian Effect, The Red Pill, etc.)
Yup. Way better value than shoes! /s
Once again, right wingers who claim to love the free market stop loving it when a corporation responds to a market demand for something that doesn’t cater to them.
OT:
Tomorrow morning, we’ll be taking my kitty in for her last visit. She’s 20 years old. Tonight she let me know that she’s done now. We’ve been having some cuddle time on the couch for the last 2 hours.
@ Vicky P
Oh my heart goes out to you; There are no words for time like this; but for what it’s worth I’m thinking of you.
@Victorious Parasol:
I’m so sorry to hear that you have to make that final trip. 20 years is a long time for a kitty, but it never seems like it’s enough when it’s time to let them go. I’m glad you’re getting cuddle time with her.
On topic: I guess no one should mention to these fools that the original idea for Monopoly (or should that be *Man*opoly) was created by a woman (if memory serves) who then also made the prototype.
Losing our animal companions is never easy. Even when it’s the most merciful thing we can do for them. I’m sorry for the heavy burden of having to make that choice. and I’m sorry for the pain your going to feel. I hope it ends soon.
Thank you, everyone.
@Victorious Parasol – It’s so hard saying goodbye to a beloved kitty. My thoughts are with you.
There’s this amazing sim, where rich white men get to take the secret shortcut path to the Ivy League, Wall Street, and SCOTUS, no matter how much they fuck up and roll nothing but ones. And if you don’t land on the exact squares that previous iterations of the game entitled you to land on, you get to knock everyone else’s pieces off the board and kick the table over and still declare yourself the winner. It’s immersive and uncannily realistic. I’m playing it right now, in fact.
The reviews are pretty mixed.
I know it’s not exactly the point of the article, but “WiFi was founded and proven by Tesla”? I know these people are thick, but damn.
@Victorious Parasol – My thoughts are with you. It is so hard to lose our beloved pets. I like to believe that my pets are waiting on the other side of the rainbow bridge. It brings me peace to believe that the loss is only temporary.
@ Naglfar: It wasn’t quite clear, but I think they were talking about how a new feminist version of The Game of Life would play out.
@VP, sorry to hear that. It’s hard to focus on the positive at a time like this, but you’ve given her an amazing life, and you’re making the right decision, even though it’s the hardest thing to do.
Who buys these novelty Monopoly games, anyway? Maybe my viewpoint is skewed, because I mostly remember Monopoly as a horrible game played to fill time at family Christmases. I can’t imagine spending money for a game which is “Monopoly, but kind of worse”.
As for Tesla and wi-fi: quite an achievement, since he died before the development of the first commercial computer. Perhaps his design had a roomful of people performing the calculations by hand, and then passing them to a man (you could only trust a man for this) to speak ones and zeroes into a radio mic?
Does anyone else feel like this new version of Monopoly is bad, from a feminist perspective? To me looks performative, like the trope of the strong protagonist woman who is praiseworthy because she is good at macho things.
It doesn’t read like a critique of anything to me. It feels like the worst of so-called woke corporatism. Am I missing something?
@Victorious Parasol
I’m so sorry to hear about your kitty. It never gets easier losing them no matter the age. At least you have a peaceful last night with her. I wish you strength for the following day.
@Victorious Parasol, all my sympathies. I’m right there with you – our appointment at the vet’s is at the end of next week (when the neighbours can give us a lift in their car) and I’m in denial, both about Dog”s gradually declining strength and about the passage of time :-/
fwiw, I’m grateful that – unlike for ourselves – at least we have this option (with Previous Dog, many years ago now, we hesitated a bit – just a short time, but I’ve always regretted that)
Sending you an incorporeal hug, if I may, and wishing peace and ease to both you and cat.
A couple of weeks ago I found a young cat in distress, trying to hide away, and helped get it to the vet (thanks to a different neighbour; we are lucky to have some nice neighbours around). It had no visible injuries but it was clearly in trouble, and we later heard that the vet had successfully treated it for Probable Encounter with Car and managed to identify the owner and it had gone home, so I’m hanging onto that.
@VP
I’m so sorry to hear that. Losing pets is incredibly hard. Internet hug (or equivalent of your choice if you don’t like hugs) xx
Ah, yes, another one of those geniuses, who doesn’t get that the whole point behind Monopoly is, that it’s an entirely arbitrary game, where you feel like making big choices, but are actually just being carried (or dumped) by dumb luck.
Because, you know, the original inventor wasn’t the biggest fan of private property.