By David Futrelle
There are few things MAGA Redditors love more than demonizing a woman. In The_Donald — Reddit’s main hangout for Trump fanboys, now quarantined for threats and doxxing — the regulars are as obsessed with Hillary as the man in the White House. And they relish mocking and smearing other female politicians they hate — which is most of them — from AOC to Nancy Pelosi.
The MAGAs also enjoy going after female celebrities — or at least that portion of them who’ve said negative things about their orange idol. It probably won’t surprise you that they despise Lena Dunham and Amy Schumer, But you might be a little surprised — I was — by the vehemence of their hatred for … Miley Cyrus.
They hate Miley for an assortment of reasons. She’s an overtly sexual — and openly bisexual — young woman who hates Trump and supports abortion rights. She dresses provocatively, sometimes wearing a strap-on dildo when she performs. She said she would move to another country if Trump was elected, but didn’t.
Not long ago she posed for a photo licking a cake emblazoned with the motto “Abortion is Healthcare.” MAGA Redditors hated the cake thing so much they posted and reposted the original photo and assorted photoshopped variants some two dozen times.
But some of the MAGA, er, “critiques” of Miley are a little stranger. Here are 12 of the weirdest MAGA takes on Miley. (And yes, it appears that most if possibly not all of these were meant seriously.)
She’s probably stinky
She’s probably stinky (in a weirdly ethnic way)
She’s had, like, hundreds of abortions, maybe
She doesn’t even need abortions because she’s ruined her uterus with too much sex, or something
Her ass is too mannish
Her boobs, which do not look particularly fake, are “plastic”
She’s too old
She might be a zombie
She drinks the blood of aborted fetuses, making her more a vampire than a zombie
She’s not even the real Miley:
She — assuming she is the real Miley Cyrus — is a “product of Disney” and also possibly a lizard person
There is one Miley-related issue on which MAGAhead Redditors disagree strongly: her pledge to not have children until global warming is fixed. While MAGAs hate even the mention of global warming, many say they’re glad that Miley won’t be “breeding.” But not all MAGAs agree:
![myanimal3z 33 points 1 month ago
The left are committing self Extinction. A true gift to the world.
permalinkunsavereportreply
[–]Alt_Chimp 1 point 1 month ago
You're celebrating white genocide.
White people are already being outproduced proportionate to others, with white liberals having babies.](https://i1.wp.com/www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/yiouphijo.png?fit=600%2C418)
TFW your hunger for increased white baby production outweighs your hatred of Miley Cyrus.
That’s the sort of moral and ethical dilemma you might expect to find only on Stormfront or The Daily Stormer. But, nope, it’s on Reddit, in a subreddit with 775,000 subscribers. Because that’s how fucked we are.
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Wait, I thought the wall was at 25. Now it’s 19? Pedophiles, sorry I mean ephebophiles, just keep getting more and more stringent with their standards.
Also, why are Miley and Hillary using female aborted fetus blood? Wouldn’t they want to use male fetus blood, because MISANDRY? /s
Anyway, once again The_Donald makes a strong showing for worst subreddit.
why are the fetuses female? I’m also pretty sure at the early stages of pregnancy, where most abortions are performed, you can’t even tell the sex of the baby, or the sex hasn’t even developed yet.
Occasionally a pop star briefly becomes the “darling” of the alt-right for entirely superficial reasons, and then when they find she’s not on their side, she becomes a traitor of the worst sort. Possibly this is what happened here.
This makes me so mad. The people who write that stuff are awful. Thank you David for what you do because it must make you sick to read that stuff.
I think those awful guys write that stuff because they can’t stand a woman who is her true self.
I think a creative or artistic woman is what really threatens them.
Yes part of what upsets them is definitely how she dresses to perform. That is what really makes me so mad.
That’s why I see my outfits and my art as an act of resistance and I don’t care what anyone says.
Sorry this is kind of incoherent but I’m upset and want to get it out.
Gotta love fans of serial cheating, multiple divorce having Donald Trump slut shaming Cyrus.
Looks like that last commenter doesn’t consider white liberals to be white people (aka human) either. Awfully interesting criteria they have for being in the ‘in’ group. 😛
They have no one to blame but themselves.
If the mostly conservative country-western listening public hadn’t gone all in for the musical staph infection known as “Achy Breaky Heart” Billy Ray Cyrus wouldn’t have forced his daughter into showbusiness for a second shot at fleeting relevance.
Dude, you know that zombies are fictional, right?
I know when I think of zombies, it’s their scrupulous honesty which comes to mind first.
So they’re the ones who look at a young woman and go “mmmm… skinnn…”, but Miley Cyrus is supposed to be the monster.
@Moggie
When I first think about zombies, I think about the millions of idiotic Americans who voted from Trump and continue to support him. Like, for example, the people on r/The_Donald.
Indian spices?
If she smells like cardamom … mmm, cardamom.
‘Scuse me – I’m going to make some badam laddo.
All of these are ridiculous, but Indian spices? Has that guy never had curry? Dhal? Indian food is delicious. Also the Miley is dead and it’s just a clone one is pretty much the storyline of the Black Mirror episode Miley starred in.
I’m quite proud of myself for letting mention of zombies go by without doing what I always do, namely recommend that everyone should see the great Japanese indie film One Cut of the Dead (Kamera o tomeru na!).
…dammit…
Whoa, dude, sick burn! ? How sour are those grapes on a scale of one to Xenomorphs-from-Aliens-movies-blood?
I had no idea that Miley Cyrus was so cool! We stan.
I hope that she doesn’t get subjected to too much vitriol for her principles.
@Catalpa
Agreed. I still don’t like her music, but her politics seem to be good. At least her music’s better than her father’s abomination “Achy Breaky Heart.” My mother loved that song when I was growing up and I had to hear it in the car all the time. Maybe it’s just that I’m not into country music, but something about Billy Rae Cyrus’s hit seems exceptionally bad.
I gather that the one about Indian spices is supposed to be some kind of racist thing, given the source, but I question why they would assume that she would smell like that. MAGA logic, I guess.
Acidtrail
Considering these are people who think A tomato is spicy. Yes it was a racist remark.
@Lainy
What? Tomatoes are not spicy. How could anyone think they were? Unless tomato has a double meaning I am unaware of.
@Naglfar: She did a pretty banging cover version¹ of Dolly Parton’s “Jolene” a few years ago:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wOwblaKmyVw
¹ Though, of course, everyone knows The Sisters of Mercy’s “Jolene” is the definitive cover version ?
Hello, I’m very much into country music, and Achy Breaky Heart is jusr bad. Why it became such a massive hit is mystifying. It’s the Fifty Shades Of Gray of country music.
I don’t much like Miley’s pop output, but I like when she gets together with the likes of Joan Jett.
Also, the latest season of Black Mirror was not very good, but Miley as a tiny, foul-mouthed robot made me laugh.
@Lainy
They must have heard that all fetuses start female by default and turn male when certain hormones are released during pregnancy. I’m sure it’s more complicated then that, although I’m no expert, but it’s probably another example of a little knowledge being a dangerous thing.
@LindsayIrene
I didn’t see that episode of Black Mirror, but I hear her cover of “Head Like a Hole” by Nine Inch Nails. It was…odd, seeing that song made poppy and upbeat.
Good to know I’m not the only person who despises “Achy Breaky Heart.”
@ Cat Mara
While I have loved the Sisters of Mercy for 24 years, my favorite cover of Jolene is Janet Devlin’s. So many covers of that song go for wild emotion, but Devlin’s sounds like a woman at the end of her rope.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7GuHizph2YM
@ Amtep
Insert Jaime Gumb quote here.