Categories
creepy cringe misogyny sex sex miseducation TERFs transmisogyny transphobia

“Check out the vaginal mucus on her,” and other things straight dudes say to each other, according to some TERF

It’s all about the mucus

By David Futrelle

Generally speaking, it’s a waste of time for sensible people to argue with TERFs — that is, Trans-Excluding Radical Feminists. But on rare occasions it can be, well, highly illuminating. And weirdly entertaining.

Take, for example, the strange debate that broke out in J.K. Rowling’s mentions last night (FWIW, Rowling herself had nothing to do with it). After a long pitched battle over such fascinating topics as whether or not TERF is a slur (it’s not, BTW), one TERF demanded to know why a trans lesbian was interested in dating … other lesbians.

@TheaGardO replied that it wasn’t about the genitals: “No one can change sex … males never get a ‘fully female body.'”

Emma responded with a question, and a NEW HERO responded with an unexpected answer:

Er, what?

Someone called Malachite Tiger tried to tease out the implications with a sarcastic comment, and then things got EPIC.

Um …..

“Vaginal mucus is certainly a key element [of] what straight men are attracted to in female bodies.” That’s a slogan I’ve never seen on a t-shirt, that’s for sure.

I can’t speak for lesbians, but as a straight man, I have to say that the term “vaginal mucus” has never once popped into my head during a sexual fantasy. I’ve never heard a guy brag about his girlfriend’s awesome vaginal mucus, or suggest to me that I “check out the mucus” on some hot gal walking by.

Yes, straight guys tend to get psyched when a cis woman they’re with gets really wet down in that, er, humid region, though to be honest this is generally because they like to give themselves credit for this happy development. Some guys are obsessed with going down on cis women, and the taste is part of that whole experience; but other guys — as cis women understandably complain — aren’t.

Meanwhile, you have probably heard about the obsession many straight dudes have with putting their dicks in women’s butts, where, by definition, there is no vaginal mucus and the necessary lubrication comes in little bottles or tubes you can literally buy at any drug store. And guess what, either option down there feels pretty good for the guy.

Seriously, as long as a cis guy has some place to put his dick, or maybe a couple of options (not all of them necessarily located on the bottom half of the body), he’s generally pretty pleased. And there is obviously a lot more to sex than putting dicks in, well, whatever hole or crevice feels good to put them in. Sex is about more than genitals. And while your preferences are your preferences, and that’s fine, the people who are the most open about what counts as sex tend to have (and to be) the most fun.

The talk about vaginal mucus seems weird because it is weird. Love is about people, not about sexual organs and their particular secretions. Straight men (and lesbians, and bi or poly people of whatever gender) can and do enjoy sex with women who have surgically constructed vaginas, or no vaginas at all. Women (and gay men, and bi/pan folks) can enjoy sex with guys whose dicks aren’t even close to porn-star sized — and with guys who are impotent or literally have no dicks. Anyone confused by any of this can easily find numerous videos illustrating all these scenarios online, and many, many more.

TERFs are obsessed with “natiral” sex, but they talk about it as if they (and we) were Martians.

We Hunted the Mammoth is independent and ad-free, and relies entirely on readers like you for its survival. If you appreciate our work, please send a few bucks our way! Thanks!

Subscribe
Notify of
guest

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

111 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
kupo
kupo
1 year ago

Oh good, a chance to share my new favorite screenshot:

comment image

Amtep
Amtep
1 year ago

Note that not all cis women have vaginal mucus either. I personally know one that doesn’t, and she met another one online. People are different.

Tabby Lavalamp
Tabby Lavalamp
1 year ago

As for why they were in Rowling’s mentions…

*sigh*

The last three people she followed are TERFs. She’s been problematic for a while now, but this is the last straw as far as I’m concerned.

Lainy
Lainy
1 year ago

Sounds like the same type of guys that shame a woman if she ask to use personal lubricant in bed. I personally need to use a lot and some guys get actually offended if you can’t get “wet” enough on your own.

Handsome :Punkle Stan: Jack

pretty sure there’s surgeries now that add saliva glands for “vaginal mucus” but idk a lot about bottom surgeries for trans femme peeps

kupo
kupo
1 year ago

@Jack
Some people in the thread were saying something to that effect, yes. But just like cis women, not all trans women produce a lot of lubrication.

It’s almost as if any distinction one tries to make between cis and trans women to justify their aversion is completely arbitrary and doesn’t actually evenly split with cis on one side and trans on the other.

Robert
Robert
1 year ago

I am dreading this making an appearance in an upcoming “Sinfest” strip.

Nasha
Nasha
1 year ago

I’m a lesbian attracted to women of all types, transwomen included. I do not care about vaginal mucus.

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

You know, if people just stopped trying to police other people’s bodies, identities and sexualities, they wouldn’t have to spend so much time and energy engaging in the rhetorical gymnastics it takes to rationalizing that policing.

It’s so much easier to just not be an asshole.

K.
K.
1 year ago

@Robert

Yeah, I dropped Sinfest like a hot potato. Should have done it years ago… :-/

Moggie
Moggie
1 year ago

@Robert, imagine what Father Ted would be like if it were made now!

Phaos
1 year ago

Sinfest hurts mostly because he’s actually a decent artist but it’s in service of an evolving parade of gross takes.

TheKND
TheKND
1 year ago

What is it? Don’t you remember your high school days when you all sat together and talked about which girl had the most viscous secretions? Well, I can remember when my dear friend Christopher told me about his love and how…
Sorry, I can’t keep a straight face! This is what happens when you run out of arguments and just go with the last thing you read. “What can I put there… erm… OH! YES! Vaginal fluids! AND DOUBLE DOWN!
But that’s TERFs for you. Not just jerks, but desperate jerks.

Jayne
Jayne
1 year ago

It seems like they’re really underestimating humankind’s ability to figure out new ways to have sex. If two (or more) humans really want to get busy, they will find a way to make it happen.

Also, I think Mr Quackenbush has just told us more about his fetishes than he wanted to. (Is it just me, or do straight guys do this a lot – assume that their more niche interests are universal?)

Katamount
1 year ago

*clicks pen*

Note to self… “vaginal mucus” is an acceptable synonym for “pussy juice” in dirty stories from now on… Twitter has spoken.

*clicks pen*

And I thought “quivering quim” was bad….

Lainy
Lainy
1 year ago

And I thought “quivering quim” was bad….

I feel attacked lol.

Lukas Xavier
Lukas Xavier
1 year ago

I get the feeling that we need an additional distinction in sexual preference. We need some way to distinguish between men who like women in a sexual way and men who hate women in a sexual way.

Ordinarily, these would both be called straight, but they’re obviously different things. Maybe it would be helpful to advance the vocabulary on this point.

EDIT:
Not sure if I expressed myself clearly. I don’t think it’s enough to say that they’re “straight guys who also hate women”. It seems the hating is integral, not just an addition.

Let me know what you think.

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
1 year ago

OT: there’s a phantom Weird Eddie comment on this site. It shows up in “recent comments” with a timestamp of just over an hour ago. Clicking on it brings up an article here but it doesn’t auto-scroll down to the bottom, and manually scrolling down reveals that the most recent comment to it is an older one by someone else.

What is going on? If this comment does not exist why are non-functioning links to it littering this site, and if it does exist why am I being forcibly prevented from viewing it? I was given to understand that comments here don’t get Facebook-like restrictions on who can see them, and are all supposed to be fully public, but that does not seem to be the case if there are comments I can discover links to but not view, does it?

Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
1 year ago

@ Surplus:

I made one just now that’s “on the timer”, and I made one on the previous thread a few minnits ago… I dunno!?!?!?

@wwth:

You know, if people just stopped trying to police other people’s bodies, identities and sexualities, they wouldn’t have to spend so much time and energy engaging in the rhetorical gymnastics it takes to rationalizing that policing.

It’s so much easier to just not be an asshole.

THANK YOUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!

@ Katamount:

from my younger daze… my brother and I throwing out grimmer and grimmer metaphors for use in porno books…

“quivering quim” IMMEDIATELY became a pseudo-super-heroe name…

I am QUIVERING QUIM!!!! I shall SLAY you, TURGID MAN-MEAT!!!
(it went south from there…)

Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
1 year ago

@ Surplus:

ahh, that’s weird (pun intended)… my comment appeared in the “recent comments” list before it got through the “5-minnit” time period for editing, then I edited it…. You must have clicked on the “recent comments link while I was in the Edit window

😉

Moon_custafer
Moon_custafer
1 year ago

@Weird Eddie:

“Quivering Quim” sounds like a name for the 1950s’ worst gelatin salad recipe.

Katamount
1 year ago

For those interested, I got “Quivering Quim” from a review I saw for the 1970s puppet porno called “Let My Puppets Cum”.

Yes, it’s real.

kupo
kupo
1 year ago

What is going on? If this comment does not exist why are non-functioning links to it littering this site, and if it does exist why am I being forcibly prevented from viewing it? I was given to understand that comments here don’t get Facebook-like restrictions on who can see them, and are all supposed to be fully public, but that does not seem to be the case if there are comments I can discover links to but not view, does it?

You have asked this question before and gotten answers before. At some point you’re just going to have to accept that sometimes the comments in the sidebar and the comments on the page are out of sync and it’s not a conspiracy.

Lainy
Lainy
1 year ago

@Katamount

not to kink shame you or anything but why would you watch that?

Shadowplay
1 year ago

… why would you watch that?

Someone thought it were a good idea to make a porno with puppets and you have to ask?

The question is “Why would you NOT watch that?” 😛

Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
1 year ago

re: puppet porn…

I watched Debbie Does Dallas… I cannot judge….

@ Kupo:

it’s not a conspiracy.

It ISSSSSS!! EVERYTHING IS A CONSPIRACY! I HEARD IT ON THE INTERNET FROM A VERY CREDIBLE-LOOKING DUDE WHO TOOK OFF HIS SHIRT AND STARTED SHOUTING ABOUT “THE LIBERALS” AND “DEEP STATE”

Lainy
Lainy
1 year ago

@Shadowplay

because i’m picturing the muppets. Like ms.Piggy and Kermit doing it in the shower or something. Kermit with the cheesy porn mustache comin in.

Jenora Feuer
Jenora Feuer
1 year ago

@Lainy:
There is a somewhat infamous movie out there called Meet the Feebles, which is pretty much ‘The Muppets’ meets ‘Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll’. Don’t watch on a full stomach.

It was also one of the earlier productions by Peter Jackson, the same man who would later do The Lord of the Rings movies.

Last year there was The HappyTime Murders, a Melissa McCarthy comedy which was pretty much a human/puppet buddy cop movie. That was even produced by Brian Henson, Jim Henson’s son.

Basically, not only do such things exist, they’ve even been done with fairly big budgets.

Shadowplay
1 year ago

Not to mention if muppet porn wasn’t a thing, Deviant Art could shut down a dozen servers. 😛

The HappyTime Murders is a rather fun movie. I mean, it’s not Who Framed Roger Rabbit levels of great, but it is close.

Rabid Rabbit
Rabid Rabbit
1 year ago

Quivering quim. Viscous vaginal mucus.

And all I can think is “Yes, we know what deep-seated fears helped Lovecraft come up with Cthulhu. We really didn’t need to have it spelled out for us, thanks.”

Monday Middlemarch
Monday Middlemarch
1 year ago

@Lukas Xavier

By George, I think I’ve got it!

Misogyny + Sexuality = Misogysexual

Definition: a heterosexual, cis gender man who is sexually attracted to women, but at the same time, hates them.

Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
1 year ago

@ Monday Middlemarch:

That describes, I fear, about half the cis, het Male population

Mels
Mels
1 year ago

I’m not comfortable with this idea that wanting to hate-fuck women is some kind of orientation. The misogyny that infects these dudes’ sexual desires is the same misogyny that infects non-sexual aspects of life and society.

Amtep
Amtep
1 year ago

There’s also a highly pornographic puppet sex scene in “Team America: World Police”. Apparently they’d been making bets about what they could get past the ratings board.

kupo
kupo
1 year ago

@Mels
Thank you. This is like saying PUA is a sexual orientation and just no.

JessicaRed
1 year ago

FWIW, Rowling herself had nothing to do with it

But she follows (and retweets) a LOT of TERFs, a lot a lot. How much more benefit of the doubt are you planning to give her? You can like an author’s work and still admit they’re a piece of shit.

JK Rowling is a TERF. Fuck her.

Steph
Steph
1 year ago

@Mels

I hear you but it is something I find particularly curious with misogynist men who still seemed obsessed with having sex and relationships with women.

The few times I have heard of women genuinely hating men – they want nothing to do with them.

Steph
Steph
1 year ago

But she follows (and retweets) a LOT of TERFs, a lot a lot. How much more benefit of the doubt are you planning to give her? You can like an author’s work and still admit they’re a piece of shit.

JK Rowling is a TERF. Fuck her.

Does she also retweet TERF statements (as in TERFy comments instead of comments from TERFs)?

Genuine question as I refuse to use Twitter?

kupo
kupo
1 year ago

@Steph
This article might help to clarify.

https://www.themarysue.com/jk-rowling-transphobic-follows/

Bakunin
Bakunin
1 year ago

Ok, so from my research on surgeons, a lot of them are leaving the Cowper’s glands intact, which does provide some level of lubrication. How much varies from person to person, like fucking everything, but TERFs are behind on their knowledge once again.

Also, surgery isn’t what gives trans women “fully female bodies”

As far as Rowling goes, she hasn’t just liked TERFs on Twitter. Her detective novel The Silkworm has a transphobic passage where a woman is threatened with a men’s prison, and a nasty implication since she’s “pre-op”.

Steph
Steph
1 year ago

@kupo

Thank you!

Catalpa
Catalpa
1 year ago

JK Rowling is going in the same box that I keep H.P. Lovecraft in. The “yeah, you made some stories and worlds that I enjoy, but fuck you, you awful person” box.

Ooglyboggles
Ooglyboggles
1 year ago

@Catalpa

I can hardly wait for her to make a statement about her reasons for following people known for their transphobia.

Gijoel
Gijoel
1 year ago

@Moggie

Mike
Mike
1 year ago

Ok this might be a dumb question but I have very limited experience with vaginas but is the secretions actually a mucus? That sounds much thicker than what I imagine.

Mels
Mels
1 year ago

@Mike – vaginal secretions are mostly mucus, and it can get quite thick. But as with everything, individuals vary. Some women have viscous discharge, some have only watery discharge, and some have none at all.

Simon
Simon
1 year ago

Off topic but Reddit have finally quarantined The Donald. The meltdon is a joy to watch, charted on Top Minds of Reddit and elsewhere

brian
brian
1 year ago

for those who enjoyed Rowling’s works in the past but maybe haven’t revisited them, I recommend checking out the podcast The Shrieking Shack, which describes itself as “a Harry Potter re-read podcast for lapsed fans.” they go through the books chapter by chapter, recapping and discussing/criticizing them, and also discuss Harry Potter news and other related things. so Rowling’s shitty political views have come up A LOT.

Katamount
1 year ago

LOL, I didn’t mean the topic to get off on puppet porno, but I’m a big Cinema Snob fan and it was one of his earlier episodes. I haven’t actually watched the full film (probably for the best), but it was directed by Deep Throat director Gerard Damiano, and it basically had the same plot as Deep Throat.

And Meet the Feebles is legendary Peter Jackson in his early career. The sodomy song at the very end is just sublimely bizarre and surprisingly well sung.

From director of Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit Sir Peter Jackson, ladies, enbies and gents!

(I’ll put an NSFW warning on it for the props, but there’s nothing explicit in the video itself.)

Laserqueen
Laserqueen
1 year ago

Vaginal mucous also varies in consistancy and quantity throughout a hormonal cycle. Super slippery clear stuff is around in the fertile window. You can take an expectorant to increase the quantity if you are trying to conceive, and want more of the easiest medium for swimmers to navigate. Healthy normal mucous varies from sticky white to slippery clear. Things you learn when trying to conceive… (many years ago, now!)

1 2 3