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Ruin your weekend with this grotesque “field report” from a MGTOW who had sex

Our thoughts exactly

By David Futrelle

So-called “Men Going Their Own Way” are so bad at the whole “going their own way” part of their little woman-hating credo that they sometimes have sex with women.

As you might imagine, this often does not go very well for either person involved. Consider this “field report” posted to the MGTOW subreddit recently by one sex-having Redditor, which may just put you off food and/or sex forever.

Had sex yesterday,” declared the MGTOW man who calls himself nowig.

Was a most disgusting, vile act.

i don’t know why i do this anymore. i really don’t.

None of us know why you do this. Aren’t you supposed to be going your own damn way?

the whole experience was traumatizing and disgusting. she was 26, around 5’2″ and petite.

That poor woman had no idea what she was in for.

making out on a park bench, i was careful to nibble around her mouth. there was something off-putting about her saliva maybe. a slight metallic aftertaste. this is true for the vast majority of girls though: i don’t like the taste.

I’m sure you taste utterly delicious yourself. Astringent, with a delicate aftertaste of bitterness and an entire life wasted.

getting back to her place, fumbling around in the dark to get her clothes off. disappointment at those 5-10 lb of concealed pudge.

How dare she be slightly less skinny than you expected!

she was totally put together in clothes, but had a falling-apart body with a thicker lower half and droopy sad tits

Dude, you are a droopy sad tit.

and this is a girl who works out and is in top 20% of americans her age.

She probably spent most of her next workout session wailing on a punching bag with fists and feet, imagining that it was your sorry ass.

touching her amorphous “spinner” bod, fingering her slimepit. i was so sadly deflated.

No one who uses the phrase “fingering her slimepit” has ever had good sex with anyone.

i felt an obligation to go down on her to prep her for the actual sex. so i did, and it was as awful as i imagined.

Yeah, I can’t imagine it was much of a treat for her either.

there was some acidic/fruity smell emanating, and i essentially used my lower lip to smush against her relatively clean clit, so as to avoid having my tongue come into contact with the main portion of her gaping moist hole.

I can’t imagine her “hole” was either gaping or moist at this point. It was probably trying to sew itself shut.

my dick was floppy and unenthused the whole time despite my having taken a cialis.

Dude, no amount of Cialis is going to fix what ails you, as your problems appear to stem from a giant deposit of toxic sludge in your brain. And where are you getting Cialis from, anyway? Do you go to Donald Trump’s old doctor?

i immediately went into nervous hyper-focus mode as i tried to get the condom on, stroke my dick into readiness, and finger and prep her while angling my semi-flaccid dick for the final insertion. trying not to be awkward while sweating from the prospect of failure.

Here’s me right now:

Onward:

once it was in, i was able to pump for a good long while, but didn’t want to change positions so as not to jeopardize my erection.

i came into the condom and immediately rushed out to clean up. i noticed a thick layer of white slime had accumulated past the condom and on the upper portion of my shaft.

Dude, you are a thick layer of white slime.

i felt chills and literally shivered with horror as i rinsed off in the shower.

You and me both, dude.

i now have some inkling of why i hate dating so much, and why my standards for women and romance and abstract ideals are so high. it’s because the actual act of sex is so appalling, anything less than perfection in the other areas would fail to compensate

Dude, think for a moment about all the times you’ve had sex. (It shouldn’t take too long.) What do all of these experiences have in common?

That’s right: YOU. It’s not that “the actual act of sex is appalling.” Most people seem to enjoy it. It’s that the actual act of sex WITH YOU is so appalling that you should never, ever do it ever again, both for your sake and for the sake of every woman in the world, so that they don’t have to even imagine what it would be like to have sex with you.

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IgnoreSandra
IgnoreSandra
1 year ago

@not a person with a vagina

Read this article about female ejaculation.
Vaginal ejaculatory fluid has much lower viscosity than semen. It is generally clear-ish. Also, female ejaculation does not occur 100% of the time during orgasm.

Nice mansplaining female ejaculation there. Just based on your general standpoint here and in the past, there’s so much evidence here for my theory of universal misogyny.

Aaron
Aaron
1 year ago

@Kupo – Again, I’ve read the comments policy. I don’t see how anything I’ve said violates it.

shine
shine
1 year ago

What on earth am I reading?

Asexuality is not synonymous with “sex-repulsed”. Autistic is not shorthand for “can’t handle stimulation”. And closeted does not equal “subconsciously hates women.”

You don’t need to be repressed, ace, or autistic to be a sex-repulsed, woman-attracted misogynist.

@David, for the love of Mothra, can we *please* get a flag on this play?

IgnoreSandra
IgnoreSandra
1 year ago

@Aaron – Take what you’ve said, then go and actually read the comments policy, then take it up with David if you still wish to violate it.

Cause as it stands, either you have worse object permanence skills and comprehension than a toddler or you didn’t read the comments policy. I’m not in a position to judge which is which, but I’ve got a hunch it’s the latter seeing as you manage to write sentences that are considered grammatically correct.

kupo
kupo
1 year ago

Try to avoid internet diagnoses of mental illness, and don’t use autism or Aspergers as an excuse for someone’s shitty behavior.

Aaron
Aaron
1 year ago

Well, the comments policy does indeed state that arguments about the comments policy are discouraged, so I will refrain from commenting further.

Catalpa
Catalpa
1 year ago

@Aaron

I also have to say that I don’t agree with this idea that we can’t look at this post from any perspective other than a feminist one. Mandating that we see this person’s rant as purely “misogyny” is frankly asinine and just stifles discussion.

What kind of productive discussion is created by the speculation of the subject’s orientation or neural condition? Seems like to me that the only thing that got said about it was “hey this guy acts like he’s disgusted by sex! I bet it’s because he’s ace/gay/autistic/etc!”

What is the point of saying that? What does it contribute to the discussion? Is there a further hypothesis that you intend to have follow from that point? (Like that men who are ace/gay/autistic/etc are somehow more likely to be misogynistic dickwads, perhaps?) Is it intended to dismiss the shitty mindset displayed by this poster, since clearly this attitude is just a result of something inherent about him, so there’s nothing that can be done?

Is the discussion that you wish to have just some armchair-diagnosing pastime, where you entertain yourself by discussing/debating which specific trait (gayness, asexuality, autism) is specifically causing this dude to be shitty and miserable and misogynistic and body-shaming?

I’d genuinely be interested in knowing what kind of discussion you’d expect to spring from comments like this, and why you’d think such a thing would be welcome here.

Jesalin: Clit-o-centric Lesbian Goddess
Jesalin: Clit-o-centric Lesbian Goddess
1 year ago

Hi David!

Reading the latest post it’s occurred to me that, in my opinion, it’d be a very good idea to have specific language in the comments policy regarding homophobic or misogynistic behaviour being an indicator of said homophobe/misogynist being ‘in the closet’ or Ace.

PS.

I really love your blog and greatly respect the work you do!

Jes

Email I just sent to David. If anyone else agrees please indicate.

kupo
kupo
1 year ago

@Jesalin
Seconded!

Bakunin
Bakunin
1 year ago

@M K
Sorry, your second post went up while I was typing, and I didn’t edit mine to reflect that.

Viscaria
Viscaria
1 year ago

I’m not around very often, so I don’t know how much importance should be placed on my opinion, but I think that would be very nice language to include in the comments policy. 🙂

Contrapangloss
Contrapangloss
1 year ago

@Jesalin

I nth the recommendation. All my yes. Quite nice. Deserves classy embroidered frame, which I am too unskilled to create.

@thread

Thanks for those of you stridently NOT throwing ace folks under the bus. It is appreciated, because busses are heavy and the Youngs Modulus of the typical human is low, which makes getting run over not fun.

Aaron
Aaron
1 year ago

I’ll be blunt: I still think the way my posts are being characterized is inaccurate. I never intended to make any concrete pronouncements about this person’s mental state; you’ll note, for example, that I never said he is asexual, and I don’t necessarily think that’s the case. All I meant was that it seems he has some personal feelings about sex (for whatever reason) that MGTOW has led him to externalize and therefore interpret as women’s objective repulsiveness.

I don’t see how this is any different from observing that (say) many incels seem to be suffering from depression or related mood disorders, and noting that this dynamic shapes their community as surely as their misogyny does.

But I’m clearly in the minority – and I know I don’t comment here regularly – so I’ll apologize for causing a stir, and refrain from any similar comments in the future.

Anonymous
Anonymous
1 year ago

>>>>>What kind of productive discussion is created by the speculation of the subject’s orientation or neural condition?

Well, we’re trying to understand what makes the MGTOWer tick. But the whole discussion misses the point. Lots of men have depression, or are autistic, or don’t like sex; no doubt they’re common in the manosphere, too, but this doesn’t explain much since *only a small minority of depressed or asexual or autistic men join the “manosphere” in the first place.*

What defines the manosphere is the feeling of *entitlement* – that they just *deserve* women’s bodies, and are angry they do not get them. The vast majority of autistic or depressed or asexual men are not like that, of course – the opposite extreme, if anything (i.e. feeling worthless and unworthy of love) is much more common among them.

Dr. Thang
Dr. Thang
1 year ago

Ok, so between 100 % and 101%, what are the chances this guy is completely full of shit? He must have had at least a dozen moments between each event in this timeline where he could have just stopped doing what he was doing if it was as intolerable as he wants us to believe, but each time, he took it further instead. It would be like if you went to a restaurant and ordered something that you already know you don’t like, ate the whole thing while complaining about how awful it is, and then ordered seconds.

My theory is that some woman rejected him, and he made up this whole story to mend his bruised ego, one where he seals the deal AND gets to be the one who isn’t interested and symbolically rejects her at the same time. He just reeks of one of those guys who gets rejected and says “whatever, you’re fat and ugly and I didn’t wanna be with you anyway!”, then turns around and tells all his guy friends that he banged her and she was the one who wanted it. For that matter, all MGTOWs are probably that guy.

Luzbelitx
1 year ago

Aaron, be kind enough to yourself as to stop digging.

dust bunny
dust bunny
1 year ago

@ Aaron

You don’t seem to understand what the problem is, so I’ll try to clarify a bit.

Teachers encourage kids by praising them for expressing very obvious ideas, but as an adult you’re supposed to move past expecting people to be impressed by all your brain farts.

You may have thoughts about what could cause someone to be like this guy, some people instinctively deal with encountering shocking things by intellectualising it and postulating about it and that’s normal. But before accepting your associations as reasonable or saying them out loud, it is good form to challenge them and consider whether they’re worth anything at all, or if they’re actually extremely tired prejudiced tropes every person of a marginalised identity has heard a million times and is sick of, and whether maybe you’ve also heard them a million times, which is why you thought of them.

Seeing someone be awful like this guy and immediately go to speculations of his orientation, mental health or neuroatypicality as an explanation encapsulates the biases of our society in a way that is the opposite of novel, useful, or interesting. It is yet another instance of privileged people distancing themselves from their own evil shit by blaming its victims for it. Us good, them bad, hating someone for being different is bad, so it must be them doing it not us. A failure at even just once condemning horrible attitudes, without also reinforcing them.

Your idea is well worn enough that it doesn’t need to be said even once anymore. Not even with all possible disclaimers. No amount of sensitivity and hedging can make expressing it not bad and dumb.

Pie
Pie
1 year ago

@Aaron

I never intended to make any concrete pronouncements about this person’s mental state;

Intent isn’t magic, as is often said here.

you’ll note, for example, that I never said he is asexual, and I don’t necessarily think that’s the case

This isn’t a court of law. Weasel words won’t help.

I don’t see how this is any different from observing that (say) many incels seem to be suffering from depression or related mood disorders

Diagnosing a mental illness over the internet by observing someone’s text-only communications with other people is futile. Speculating is is at best pointless, and is at worse attaching the behavior of some asshole to a group of people who already have a lot on their plate and don’t need the additional hassle of cleaning up that shit as well. So don’t do that.

Also, because it bears repeating,

http://i.imgur.com/M7DgVn7.gif

Moggie
Moggie
1 year ago

@M K:

Frankly, I don’t really ever read the entire comment thread before commenting because I usually don’t care, I just want to react/riff. Especially since as you said, it was literally two pages of comments.

I can speak only for myself, but I find that behaviour rude in just about any forum. Not every comment has to be a pearl of timeless wisdom, of course – Christ knows mine rarely are – but I do need to know, before posting, that I’m not just rehashing a point which has been discussed adequately earlier in the thread. If you just want to react, and can’t be bothered to see what has already been said, you’re implying that your comment and your time are more important than other peoples’. That’s not behaviour which should be encouraged in a blog community.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
1 year ago
ellesar
ellesar
1 year ago

Oh that poor woman. I actually started remembering American Psycho (book not film) when I read that.

It is hard to comprehend how/ why someone WOULD feel sexual desire if they are so repulsed by sex.

And all the way through his disgust is firmly positioned as HER fault, not his.

I hope fervently that her next sexual encounter is with someone who can treat and respect her as an actual person.

KG
KG
1 year ago

Email I just sent to David. If anyone else agrees please indicate.

Agree!

TheKND
TheKND
1 year ago

@Alan Robertshaw

Oh, well, with comments that include pearls like

It literally does not matter if women or any woman actually hates men, because the hate is expressed in such different ways it may as well be a completely different thing

It might not be that OT.

Nanny Oggs Busom
Nanny Oggs Busom
1 year ago

OP had a crap one night stand and ran off to his echo chamber to whine about how the sex-object wasn’t perfect and had human things like taste and smell.

Oh, the horror!
Poor baby!

Meanwhile, the woman he had sex with (if it actually happened) chalked the experience up to a waste of time, deleted his number and got on with her life.

Dude, if you’re so disgusted by sex and by human bodies, don’t have sex. It’s not compulsory, you know.

cornychips
cornychips
1 year ago

Re: homophobic shit closet remarks

I wholehheartedly agree that there needs to be a post and an update in the comment rules about this. This matter can derail threads and cause unnecessary crap.

cornychips
cornychips
1 year ago

Also, on topic, i cant imagine the HORROR this guy might experience if he ever watched a woman GIVE BIRTH.

Podkayne Lives
Podkayne Lives
1 year ago

“Read this article about female ejaculation.
Vaginal ejaculatory fluid has much lower viscosity than semen. It is generally clear-ish. Also, female ejaculation does not occur 100% of the time during orgasm.”

(Insert really patient-faced gif here.)

I have a vagina. My speculation is based on something I have seen happen when I have sex with a guy with a penis wearing a condom. Vaginal lubrication–not ejaculate–can build up above the base of the gentleman’s penis, above where the condom ends, during intercourse. It can be white or whiteish, and it’s the kind of thing that would upset this squeamish fellow. It’s not ejaculate, and it doesn’t require orgasm to be produced.

Dude. Seriously?

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
1 year ago

Well, I’m certainly disproving the ‘men don’t cry’ stereotype right now.

(Not kidding; proper gushing. But this is possibly one of the best things I’ve ever watched)

https://youtu.be/AZS5cgybKcI

Who?
Who?
1 year ago

Hm, I think it is enough to say that the guy has isues and shouldn’t have had the sexual encounter above.
There is definitly misogyny here but more speculation if that means that the OP is X, only hurts people who are X.

Now what I agree is that beeing in a comunity like MGTOW or Incel makes their problems worse and makes them more dangerous for others (we had a few murderers who come from exspecially the Incelmovement).

What I understand is the gutreaction “this guys are not normal, there is somethink very wrong with them!” Yes there is there are a) asholes b) indoctrinated in a very harmful cult.

This sounds like not much, but this is enough. Doesn’t need more, we don’t search for other reasons from religious extremists for example.

Nowherepants
Nowherepants
1 year ago

Ok, so between 100 % and 101%, what are the chances this guy is completely full of shit? He must have had at least a dozen moments between each event in this timeline where he could have just stopped doing what he was doing if it was as intolerable as he wants us to believe, but each time, he took it further instead. It would be like if you went to a restaurant and ordered something that you already know you don’t like, ate the whole thing while complaining about how awful it is, and then ordered seconds.

My theory is that some woman rejected him, and he made up this whole story to mend his bruised ego, one where he seals the deal AND gets to be the one who isn’t interested and symbolically rejects her at the same time. He just reeks of one of those guys who gets rejected and says “whatever, you’re fat and ugly and I didn’t wanna be with you anyway!”, then turns around and tells all his guy friends that he banged her and she was the one who wanted it. For that matter, all MGTOWs are probably that guy.

*applauds*

EXACTLY!

@Podkayne: The point I was trying to get across is that the author is an idiot for insinuating that the slimy white substance he described on the condom was produced by her. It was his own damn JIZZ. End of story.

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

The point I was trying to get across is that the author is an idiot for insinuating that the slimy white substance he described on the condom was produced by her. It was his own damn JIZZ. End of story.

It could’ve been cervical mucous. There are parts of the menstrual cycle, midway through in which there’s quite a bit of it and it can be white, can be clear, depending on where the vagina-haver is in their cycle.

kupo
kupo
1 year ago

@WWTH
Certain medications make it thick and white almost the whole cycle for some people (hi!). Mine got stuck that way even after stopping the medication, so that’s fun. Doctors are unconcerned, so there’s that.

@Nowherepants
Seriously stop trying to correct people with vaginas on what kinds of slimes come out of them. Believe it or not, we’re way more familiar with what comes out of our bodies than people who don’t have the same equipment.

Catalpa
Catalpa
1 year ago

the author is an idiot for insinuating that the slimy white substance he described on the condom was produced by her. It was his own damn JIZZ. End of story.

Uhhhh, given that he described the white substance as being past the condom and on the upper part of his shaft, I sincerely hope that it WASN’T his own jizz. Since, you know, the whole point of a condom is to keep the semen inside of it, and not spilling out the top.

TheKND
TheKND
1 year ago

May I interject?
I think the reason why the guy mentioned the “slimy white substance”, whatever it may have actually been, is because he wanted to hint at the Incel myth that every woman is constantly and always stuffed to the brink with some Chad’s spunk.

(Though I have a really funny story *Suppository Humor Warning*
When one of our (dementia) patients suddenly had a thick, weirdly smelling mucus coming from her vagina. We instantly ran and desperately went through her records to find out what could have caused it. When we checked her prescriptions, we noted that she was supposed to get a suppository today.
“Hey, fellow nurse!” We shouted “Did the patients get her suppository?”
“No, I put it on the table to warm it up and give her later.”
“But there was no…”
Run to patient
“Ma’am, did you try to take your suppository yourself?”
“Oh, I just wanted to help…”

Terrible aim, the dear. I love my job…)

Rhuu - apparently an illiterati
Rhuu - apparently an illiterati
1 year ago

@ Jes’s email – friggin cosigned.

Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
1 year ago

I had a look at the OP’s comments. One comment really affected me…this person’s had a few sexual experiences with women, but says he prefers p0rn over sex with another person. He also says he has a strong aversion to other people’s bodily fluids, not women’s in particular.

It just strikes me as ironic. He prefers the sanitized, one dimensional p0rn over interaction with another human being. I think that’s deeply sad.

Susan
Susan
1 year ago

@Who?

we don’t search for other reasons from religious extremists for exmample

Yes, but we should! What makes people prey to these dangerous ideologies? It is a serious and important question. Agree wholeheartedly that speculating about the person in question being X is hurtful to those among us who are X. We need to not do that.

But I think some commenters go too far in suggesting that we shouldn’t try to figure out how and why regular jerks can turn into dangerous and hateful jerks. I would argue that a lot depends on our figuring out how this happens. I mean, we can say, “it’s the patriarchy stupid” or “assholes gonna asshole” but that doesn’t get us closer to figuring out how to prevent them from going full toxic.

Now, obviously, in a forum like this where the only information we have is the guy’s post, we can’t get to that answer. We can’t know what he’s thinking. But we can identify in his writing an appalling lack of self-awareness. We can identify the elements of his misogyny that have to do with idealization and objectification. And thinking through some of these issues together may help us to understand better where this is coming from and how to stop it.

I have sons and I don’t want them to turn into this. I’m doing everything I know how to do to keep that from happening. But if I don’t know how it happens I’m not going to be as effective.

LindsayIrene
LindsayIrene
1 year ago

I… just…

The vagina produces all sorts of stuff, not just during ejaculation/squirting (which not all women do). Sex doesn’t have to be involved at all, the vagina is just constantly ‘shedding’. Like, sometimes this aspic-like substance comes out. At times, the discharge leaves white streaks on one’s panty gusset and that’s completely normal. During a yeast infection, it resembles cottage cheese.

One time, a minor celebrity was nationally shamed for having normal vaginal discharge.

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

It’s funny how manospherians pretend like they’re obsessed with fertility as a scientific rationale for creeping on teenage girls, but they clearly don’t know anything about actual reproductive science. That “slime” they’re so disgusted with, aka cervical mucous is a fertility sign as it increases at and near ovulation. It’s almost like the fetishization of youthful virgins has nothing to do with biology at all!

Crip Dyke
Crip Dyke
1 year ago

For the record, i never thought this was an accurate accounting of the true details of an actual series of events.

I’m opposed to speculating on the psychology of this person for other reasons, but even if you aren’t convinced by the ethical and practical issues involved in crazy-blaming that you should cut that shit out, everyone should at the very least consider that this story is made up horseshit. Some details are of a kind the human brain tends to remember – the use of the lower lip on the clit is described as a conscious choice, and we remember an event better if we considered our options and consciously chose one – but other aspects of the story include details a person seems to me unlikely to remember.

This is also a useful thing to remember if one is thinking about mansplaining the exact consistency of one or two ejaculates and comparing that to the description of a particular fluid not given a source.

This is even besides the fact that ejaculates are not the only fluids involved in sex, and that spermicides and lubes and mucus and ejaculate can all interact in various ways to make new colors and viscosities.

Saying, “I know what really happened inside this woman’s vagina during the time of this story to produce whitish slime at the base of the jerkface’s dick” is exactly akin to explaining what lifting stance Atlas used to hold up the sky, which types of clay Yahweh used to to make Adam’s pancreas, which computer programs Batman used to track the Joker’s international money laundering, or which alloys were used to make the coils in the Millennium Falcon’s hyperdrive.

It’s a myth Miggie-toe’s tell each other to feel better, to feel special, to feel intelligent, to feel powerful.

While, thankfully, no women were harmed in the production of this story, there’s nothing in it that requires the explanations of human physics, chemistry, or biology. If it produced an indelible slime, don’t look to vaginas as the source.

Nowherepants
Nowherepants
1 year ago

Uhhhh, given that he described the white substance as being past the condom and on the upper part of his shaft, I sincerely hope that it WASN’T his own jizz. Since, you know, the whole point of a condom is to keep the semen inside of it, and not spilling out the top.

I know right? Sometimes condoms rupture or perhaps he didn’t put it on correctly……assuming that this sexual encounter did indeed occur(which is at most 1% likely).

had a look at the OP’s comments. One comment really affected me…this person’s had a few sexual experiences with women, but says he prefers p0rn over sex with another person. He also says he has a strong aversion to other people’s bodily fluids, not women’s in particular.

It just strikes me as ironic. He prefers the sanitized, one dimensional p0rn over interaction with another human being. I think that’s deeply sad.

Don’t worry about it. People like this are not going to reproduce. There are always have been people(of both sexes mind you) who are turned off by things that are perfectly natural and there always will be.
People are repulsed by them because this is abnormal and it ultimately won’t lead to procreation. As long as they do not impinge on other people’s rights they are an anomaly that deserves no further attention.

kupo
kupo
1 year ago

People are repulsed by them because this is abnormal and it ultimately won’t lead to procreation.

Uhhh, don’t. Procreation isn’t the only drive humans have. I’m repulsed by this man because he’s so grossly misogynistic. Not because he’s abnormal or because he didn’t enjoy this one sexual encounter.

As long as they do not impinge on other people’s rights they are an anomaly that deserves no further attention.

As someone not affected by spaces that breed and further radicalize misogynists, I’m sure you feel safe and confident saying this. For those of us directly impacted by their hate in myriad ways that both do and don’t impinge on our rights, it actually is really important. And again, if you believe this, why are you on a blog devoted to mocking this exact kind of thing?

Viscaria
Viscaria
1 year ago

@Susan

But I think some commenters go too far in suggesting that we shouldn’t try to figure out how and why regular jerks can turn into dangerous and hateful jerks.

I don’t interpret any of the comments here as saying we should not try to answer this question. Would you mind pointing out what comments read to you as saying this?

I, myself, am certainly interested in learning about (and hopefully preventing) the spread of misogyny and other forms of hate and oppression.

Catalpa
Catalpa
1 year ago

Sometimes condoms rupture or perhaps he didn’t put it on correctly…
[…]
Don’t worry about it. People like this are not going to reproduce.

First off, what? First you’re 100% that it’s semen that’s outside of the condom after the guy has just had sex, and then you say that he’s never going to reproduce? Do you have any idea how reproduction works?

Or are you claiming that he’s not going to reproduce because you think the whole story is entirely fabricated? In that case, why would you be sure that it’s imaginary jizz at the base of the guy’s imaginary penis, when the story is clearly intended to imply that the white substance was the fault of the woman? If a story is made up, you can’t argue about what actually happened in it, because nothing actually happened.

For another thing, even if it was the case that this guy well never reproduce, guess what? He doesn’t need to reproduce to harm women! He can do that within his own lifetime, as has been demonstrated by thousands and thousands of other assholes!

Bookworm in hijab
Bookworm in hijab
1 year ago

it’d be a very good idea to have specific language in the comments policy regarding homophobic or misogynistic behaviour being an indicator of said homophobe/misogynist being ‘in the closet’ or Ace.

YES PLEASE.

Jarnsaxa
Jarnsaxa
1 year ago

And Nowherepants perfectly illustrates the problem with speculation on people’s orientations by throwing all ace people under the bus as unlovable abnormal freaks.

Thanks, I hate it.

Bookworm in hijab
Bookworm in hijab
1 year ago

So how did I manage to mess up what was the quote and what was my response?!

Jes, I totally agree with you re not saying homophobia or misogyny is due to orientation (or to mental illness). That’s an important point, and especially as we live in a society that constantly blames bad actions on the perpetrator’s orientation or mental health. Way to chuck already marginalized groups under the bus, eh?

Susan (? I think?) I also agree with you that it would be good if we as a society had some idea of the process by which “ordinary” hateful jerks become murderous hateful jerks, WITHOUT blaming it on mental illness, orientation, or (please!) religious belief. I have a son, and it’s a worry of mine (though he’s lovely, and very anti-sexism even at a young age). It’s not so much that I worry about HIM specifically as that I want to better understand this “process of radicalization”. I just…I don’t know how we can catch and change this. And I HATE that it gets passed off in the media as “crazy lone wolf therefore violent” (sorry for that language and I hope it didn’t hurt anyone; I’m intending to show how the media always presents it, NOT to blame mental illness for evil behaviour!). The other option the media uses is “brown-skinned therefore violent”, which of course is just as bad in a different way…

Moggie
Moggie
1 year ago

@Nowherepants:

There are always have been people(of both sexes mind you) who are turned off by things that are perfectly natural and there always will be.
People are repulsed by them because this is abnormal and it ultimately won’t lead to procreation. As long as they do not impinge on other people’s rights they are an anomaly that deserves no further attention.

Speaking as someone who is turned off by sex, could you tell me, on a scale of one to Quasimodo, exactly how repulsive I am to “normal” people? I’d like to know how far under the bus I need to be, thanks.

Bookworm in hijab
Bookworm in hijab
1 year ago

@Moggie,

on a scale of one to Quasimodo, exactly how repulsive I am to “normal” people

Hugs if you want them. I always find your wit and incisive humour very opposite-of-repulsive. I’m so sorry this thread had been made hurtful.

Susan
Susan
1 year ago

Hi, @Viscaria.

So on rereading I think comments by IgnoreSandra, dust bunny and Who? that originally came across to me as dismissive of discussion were in fact more pointedly dismissive of / conveying frustration with commenters who didn’t seem to get the point about the offensiveness of their line of speculation. So an overreaction or an under-reading-comprehension on my part! I hereby retract that part of my comment!