Categories
bullying bunnies chad thundercock cringe cuck cuckolding dude you've got no fucking idea what you're talking about empathy deficit entitled babies has possibly never spoken to a woman hypergamy men who should not ever be with women ever MGTOW misogyny reddit

Pro athletes are cucking Brad Pitt, because all women love jocks, confused MGTOW contends

Even Brad Pitt gets sand kicked on him at the beach

By David Futrelle

Manosphere misogynists seem to think that the world is basically the first three panels of that famous cartoon Charles Atlas ad writ large, in which musclebound “Bullies of the Beach” are continually kicking sand on wimpy beta males and humiliating them in front of their girlfriends.

Indeed, many manosphere dudes are convinced that that this old cartoon ad is a completely accurate description of how the world works. Forget all the women out there with skinny husbands or boyfriends; forget all the women writing fanfic about Benedict Cumberbatch. These guys honestly believe that literally the only men that women want to have sex with are big, burly jocks.

Consider this recent comment in the Men Going Their Own Way subreddit that conveniently captures all the key elements of this manosphere delusion. Warning against the dangers of female “hypergamy,” by which he evidently means the innate tendency of every straight women to immediately drop whatever man she’s with if a Chadly jock looks her way, the MGTOW Redditor who calls himself GamingYourMom declares that

while rock stars and famous actors can be considered acttractive, they will get cucked by a professional athlete everytime. It’s just like high school. Nothing has changed. The jocks roll in pussy.

MGTOWs seem utterly convinced that the world works exactly like high school — or at least how they imagine high school works. In some sense, they’ve never graduated; they’re still jealous of the high school football star who dated the cheerleader they had a crush on. Literally.

If you are at the top of the pyramid in theatre or band, you can nail a hot nerdy chick, but you still don’t get the cheerleaders.

You know, I’m pretty sure the theater guy dating the “hot nerdy chick” preferred her to the cheerleaders, because, you know, people generally like dating people they have something in common with?

But never mind, because apparently the jocks are out there cucking even the world’s most famous theater guys:

Brad better keep Angelina away from NFL players if he knows what’s good for him.

Yes, he brought up Brad Pitt, every manosphere misogynist’s favorite — if perhaps a teensy bit outdated — example of the ultimate handsome dude. Never mind that Brad and Angelina split MORE THAN TWO YEARS AGO and have been fighting bitterly over the terms of their divorce ever since. Never mind that even after this split Angelina has never been spotted hitting the town with a football team.

And you can be ugly as fuck and still consistently pull if you are over six feet.

More bad news for Brad, who’s only 5′ 11″ tall!

And no one in this sub is Brad Pitt, so if you’re not 6ft., you’re fucked. Women say as much in their tinder bio. “If you’re not at least 6ft., go ahead and swipe left.”

I’ve never used Tinder, but I’ve used other dating sites and apps, and while I’ve seen women (some women) express a preference for tall guys, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a woman categorically ruling out all men under 6 feet.

Nature says big guys win the fight, and a woman wants to fuck a winner.

Uh, I’m pretty sure most women prefer being with men who aren’t always getting into fights, for assorted very obvious reasons.

And this isn’t even how nature — red in tooth and claw — works. If size were the only — or even the most influential — determining factor in evolutionary success, wouldn’t humans have evolved to be huge monsters? Wouldn’t every animal? Why would short men — or small animals — even exist?

Elephants are the largest land animals, and can kill people with a swing of their trunk. There are about 450,000 of them left in the world. Rabbits are small and fuzzy and scare almost nobody; though there are no reliable estimates of the rabbit population, there are probably billions of them. (At one point there were ten billion in Australia alone.) I live in a fairly dense neighborhood in a major metropolitan area, and I regularly spot wild rabbits hopping across lawns and in the alleyways. I’ve never seen an elephant wander by.

Here are some bunny videos, just for the hell of it.

https://twitter.com/jumpFloofs/status/1065992037420404741
https://twitter.com/BunnyArchives/status/1093150711012052993
https://twitter.com/BunnyArchives/status/1093542700585046019

But I digress. The point is that MGTOWs don’t know anything about anything and seem to think the world works like Charles Atlas ads.

We Hunted the Mammoth is independent and ad-free, and relies entirely on readers like you for its survival. If you appreciate our work, please send a few bucks our way! Thanks!

Subscribe
Notify of
guest

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

88 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Redsilkphoenix: Jetpack Vixen, Intergalactic Meanie
Redsilkphoenix: Jetpack Vixen, Intergalactic Meanie
1 year ago

This new Watership Down sounds like it might be worth getting Netflix for, at least. (Depending on what else they’re offering right now, of course. Like, maybe the live-action Fullmetal Alchemist movie, perhaps?)

Though I have to ask if they’re including anything from the sequel WD book, which was a collection of short stories about the rabbits. Some of that was interesting, at least to me. Almost worth the total erasure of General Woundwort from rabbit memory it had. Seriously, he deserved to become a semi-legendary figure among the rabbits; the cousin of the Black Rabbit that drove all the predators before him? That should’ve been how he was remembered among them.

Though now I’m reminded of a reviewer of the second WD book who complained that the sequel betrayed the themes of the original, because the first book wasn’t really about rabbits having adventures but the US/USSR Cold War. And my reaction to that was basically ‘dude, if the only way you can enjoy a story about anthromorphic rabbits is to turn it into a political parable, go ahead. Bleah. Just don’t force that interpretation on everyone else.’

Crip Dyke
1 year ago

@moon_custafer:

The first time I really crushed out on a movie character (and possibly the last time?) was Mary Stuart Masterson’s Watts in Some Kind of Wonderful.

There are other characters I found attractive in either appearance or attitude or whatever, but adolescent hormones + MSM’s Watts combined to produce the only thing that I would label a true crush I’ve ever had on a fictional television or movie persona.

💕 CD + Watts FOREVER 💕

Victorious Parasol
Victorious Parasol
1 year ago

@Redsilkphoenix

They had the live-action FMA last I looked, yes.

This Watership Down adaptation ends with Hazel-rah’s death and the warren thriving.

moregeekthan
moregeekthan
1 year ago

Oh, so we are doing bunnies today?

I do have a pet bun. He is litter trained. Maintenance similar to a cat, but food and litter _much_ easier to deal with. Mine seems to be on the less-social end of rabbits, so he is fine being alone most of the day. Other buns do better in pairs.

Thought the Netflix Watership Down was pretty good, but not good enough to make me change my avatar (though Boyega was an excellent Bigwig). Some of the changes from the book made sense for what they were doing, but there was also a fair bit of shuffling around who did what that I found confusing. And poor Pipkin is going to have to go tip one back with Tom Bombadil and Aunt Beast.

Gaebolga
Gaebolga
1 year ago

Katamount wrote:

I mean, for guys that complain endlessly about hypergamy, this is how they see women: wring what social status you can out of a relationship with her until a more popular one comes along.

Yeah, that whole hypergamy thing the manosphereians are always whinging on about has always been a pretty transparent case of projection; they assume that women act just like they do…or would, if they could actually find a woman who either didn’t pick up on or ignored the overwhelming rage and hatred exuding from their every pore and went out with them.

In fact, it seems like it’s always projection when conservative/right-wing folks decry someone or something; look closely enough, and you’ll see them doing the exact same thing. My personal favorite example is how they lose their shit over “political correctness” almost as much as they lose it over people talking bluntly about the deep veins of racism that are shot through their entire movement. “You snowflakes just can’t handle someone speaking the truth! And stop calling us bigots for saying racist things; that’s unacceptable!”

AsAboveSoBelow
AsAboveSoBelow
1 year ago

“Rabbits are small and fuzzy and scare almost nobody.”

ALMOST nobody. Except Sir Robin.

Curious_Diversions
Curious_Diversions
1 year ago

The jocks roll in pussy.

BREAKING NEWS: Area man discovers that literally rolling in pussy less pleasant than expected. See also: “Neck Deep in Pussy”.

M K
M K
1 year ago

“He’s rolling in pussy”

*Cut to Jake Peralta or Terry, or Ben or Andy from Parks and Rec, on their back on the floor with a million cats or kittens around them, meowing and climbing on them; whichever male character it is looks overjoyed*

Moggie
Moggie
1 year ago

Please try not to roll *on* the pussy. You can easily hurt a cat that way. Best to let the pussy do all the rolling.

Elizabeth
Elizabeth
1 year ago

@M K

Jane Done
Jane Done
1 year ago

@Katamount

Yeah I’m noticing that too; it seems like the line between migtoe and incel is increasingly becoming a blur (I refuse to make a blurred lines joke here, fuck that song).

Also yeah, right-wingers and especially the far-right are neck-deep in hipocrisy. No surprise to me, having grown up in a far-right religious community. Hipocrisy is a fundamental component, a cornerstone, to right-wing-nuttery.

Jane Done
Jane Done
1 year ago

The funniest thing about that Charles Atlas ad to me is that I just read an article the other day talking about how visible muscles are in fact the least useful in everyday life, and probably wouldn’t help winning that fight as much as other things could. Like maybe the emotional maturity to not go slug someone in the face unprovoked for being an ass previously.

In fact, that article could probably be rather enlightening to big-toes if they ever pulled their heads out of their asses, but I’m certain by now they must’ve evolved into being anaerobic (how else could they live that way for so long?), so they’d probably suffocate if they did.

Gaebolga
Gaebolga
1 year ago

Jane Done wrote:

The funniest thing about that Charles Atlas ad to me is that I just read an article the other day talking about how visible muscles are in fact the least useful in everyday life, and probably wouldn’t help winning that fight as much as other things could.

That is absolutely true; just take a look at the contestants in the Strongest Man in the World competition: they’re big and burly, sure, but very, very few of them are cut. The bodybuilder physique is for show, not for work.

Exhibit A: Hafthor Bjornsson

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
1 year ago

When it comes to muscle building, the functionality versus aesthetics dichotomy is a big thing with me. They tend to be mutually exclusive. Similarly, even when going down the functionality route; you have to choose strength or endurance; it’s nigh on impossible to have both. Cyclists and boxers both have strong muscles; but generally very different physiques. It’s at a basic level; slow twitch muscle for endurance; fast twitch muscles for power.

It’s axiomatic though that when bodybuilders are at peak competition readiness, they’re as weak as kittens.

Gaebolga
Gaebolga
1 year ago

Alan Robertshaw wrote:

…you have to choose strength or endurance; it’s nigh on impossible to have both.

Well, impossible once you start pushing toward the edges of performance. You can get a decent mix if you’re not striving to be a competitive athlete.

And, of course, body type also has a say; when I was in my 20s and heavily into kung fu, my sifu would customize training regimens for his students based on their body type and preferred fighting style. Much to my dismay, he tracked me into the strength/body hardening regimen…I may have a meat tank’s body, but my soul craves speed and flexibility.

Kevin
Kevin
1 year ago

@ M K

That might upset Cedric.

Jane Done
Jane Done
1 year ago

@Alan Robertshaw, Gaebolga

I have to wonder, where do things like freerunning or gynmnastics fit into the strength-endurance binary? Are parkour athletes weaklings compared to any other sport?

Not to come off as testy but I tend to be reflexively sceptical of absolute binary concepts.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
1 year ago

@ gaebolga

pushing toward the edges of performance

Well that’s me. I’ve got smoking my post workout roll-up down to 5.2 seconds.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
1 year ago

@ Jane Done

Good point. As Gaebolga points out, I’m thinking of the real pushing the envelope stuff. Athletes, and bodybuilders, at the top of their game.

Humans of course are pretty good generalists. I think it’s possibly our Jack of All Trades abilities that have served us so well in evolutionary terms. In just about every category* there’s other species much better at it than us; but overall we can at least perform adequately in just about any area. Presumably that why we can survive, and thrive, in just about any environment (sorry planet).

So, as you rightly say, for everyday purposes, and plenty of athletic activities, a bit of a mix is great adaptation, and perfectly possible.

(* I was thinking maybe our long range tracking abilities? but Komodo dragons can be pretty tenacious)

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
1 year ago

@ Jane Done

This might sound a bit daft, but one thing that brought home to me how limited binary thinking was, is astronomy.

When I was a kid there were very distinct categories for astronomical things.

So there were comets and asteroids; planets and stars, planets and everything else in the solar system.

But now we know that the distinction between comets and asteroids can be pretty nebulous; they can both it seems be dirty snowballs, and some asteroids may have comas I believe. Similarly, the planet, brown dwarf, star, thing is very much a spectrum. And don’t get me started on ‘what’s a planet?’.

(Pluto, that’s what!)

Jenora Feuer
Jenora Feuer
1 year ago

@Alan:
I’ve commented before that endurance is one of the things that humans have over pretty much all other land animals; the only one that can potentially beat a human in good shape in a marathon is the wolf. Which is why we made them our hunting partners; we both have a history of using the ‘chase things until they fall over’ method of hunting.

(I’ll admit I got into that argument for the first time with regards to furry fandom because I was annoyed at how some people kept saying that humans were so weak and couldn’t survive by themselves. Yeah, no, we had to survive long enough for intelligence to become useful, as it’s a long-run thing, and endurance was most of how we got there. Also, the bipedal walking gait is incredibly efficient. As well as being something you may have to partially unlearn in martial arts and certain sports because throwing yourself slightly off-balance forward to use that momentum to keep yourself moving as you catch yourself on the next step can be counter-productive.)

Also:

But now we know that the distinction between comets and asteroids can be pretty nebulous; […]

Pun intended?

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
1 year ago

@ jenora

Pun intended?

I’m going to claim yes.

doethreetwoone
doethreetwoone
1 year ago

@bradmoonrising

Firstly, great handle (is there anything better than a CCR pun?). Second great pic.

But BUT BUUUUT, we don’t know how big Chad Pitt’s wrists are! He might just be an unlovable beta cuck like the rest of us.

Rabid Rabbit
Rabid Rabbit
1 year ago

OT: MISANDRY!!!

https://www.theguardian.com/science/2019/feb/13/female-human-body-blocks-weak-sperm-scientists-find

The manosphere is going to love this. Female bodies BIOLOGICALLY discriminate against beta sperm. Unfair!

But but but… This also means that once upon a time, they WERE alpha sperm. So women should bow down and worship them, because it’s biologically proven that they’re superior specimens!

Jane Done
Jane Done
1 year ago

the distinction between comets and asteroids can be pretty nebulous

Good one. That gave me a snicker.

Though I would’ve preferred a reese.

@Rabid Rabbit

I’m guessing the stance they’ll go with is both, at the same time.

Snowberry
Snowberry
1 year ago

@Jenora Feuer: There’s at least one more – horses. Which we also domesticated. And possibly zebras, but those are too independent and self-centered to domesticate, despite being herd animals.

But the list probably is pretty short.

Rabid Rabbit
Rabid Rabbit
1 year ago

@Jane Done

Both at the same time, and completely ignoring the fact that about half the Alpha sperm turn out to be women.

Gaebolga
Gaebolga
1 year ago

Jane Done wrote:

I have to wonder, where do things like freerunning or gynmnastics fit into the strength-endurance binary? Are parkour athletes weaklings compared to any other sport?

They’re essentially competitive generalists. A gymnast or parkour athelete won’t be able to keep up their pace for 4-6 hours like a professional cyclist, not will they be able to lift anywhere near as much weight as a powerlifter. Most sports have different requirements in terms of muscle use.

Instead of thinking of it as a binary, think of it as a min-maxing problem: simplistically, there’s only a certain amount of musculature that each anchor point can support, and each of those muscles can be a mix of fast and slow twitch, with the proportion of each varying depending on use. If you work out to maximize strength, your body will decrease the density of slow twitch muscle in order to increase the fast twitch, which means reducing your endurance to increase your strength. But if you train for something that requires both, you’ll get a mix…which means you won’t be at your personal maximum possible strength, nor at your maximum possible stamina, but as both gymnastics and freerunning require you to be stronger than you would be at maximum stamina and more endurant than you would be at maximum strength, those are the constraints you have to work with.

Of course, different people’s bodies can support different amounts of muscle, and their muscle fibers have slightly different properties, so “talent” (for lack of a better word) can play a significant role, especially in professional sports where a fraction of a second can make a world of difference. In everyday situations with non-atheletes, it doesn’t matter as much.

Jane Done
Jane Done
1 year ago

@Gaebolga: ah I see, good analogy

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
1 year ago

@ gaebolga

Seconding Jane; great analogy.

Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
1 year ago

@ Jane Done;

Good one. That gave me a snicker.

Though I would’ve preferred a reese.

But, but Almond Joy’s got nuts! (Mounds don’t)

Gaebolga
Gaebolga
1 year ago

@Jane Done and Alan Robertshaw

Thank you!

Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
1 year ago

re: cheerleaders

“Cheerleading is the world’s most dangerous athletic activity. Cheerleaders suffer death and catastrophic injury at three times the the rate of NFL players” thing.

Saw a wonderful response to a “cheerleading’s not an athletic endeavor” mansplain, don’t remember where I saw it…

The (mildly) offended cheerleader retorts”Oh, really? Do my routine, then get back to me on that– when you can walk again”

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
1 year ago

@ weird eddie

The reason I found out about cheerleaders is because my you-tubing involves a lot of fitness type stuff. But it’s usually all the military type regimens. Navy SEAL training and the like. But in my recommends a cheerleading one popped up. “Huh? Well, may as well take a peek.”

*Several cheerleader training vids later*

“Fuck that; I’ll stick with my Log PT”

Redsilkphoenix: Jetpack Vixen, Intergalactic Meanie
Redsilkphoenix: Jetpack Vixen, Intergalactic Meanie
1 year ago

My apologies for coming back to this so late; got munched on a bit by RL.

@Victorious Parasol

The things in the WD sequel I was referring to (from memory) were a reference to some of the does from Woundwort’s warren discovering what was described by the rabbits as a psychic river (a ley line?) that showed them the lives and problems of another warren. Later, some time after the defeat of Woundwort but well before Hazel’s death, the fomer leader of that unknown warren shows up at Watership Down for a while. Was anything like that referenced in the new series? Or the expanded tales of El-ahrairah?

At any rate, I’ll have to see how Netflix does their subscriptions and see what I can afford (and if it’ll work on an SE5), and catch the rabbits and FMA before they poof on me again.

Thank you for your help.

Dvärghundspossen
Dvärghundspossen
1 year ago

A lot of bodybuilders are pretty damn strong, though, in between contests. There’s even an established term for that: “Fat-strong”. As in “I’m in the fat-strong phase right now”. Obviously doesn’t mean fat for real, but, like, a decent amount of body fat. Then you diet it all off for a contest, and so on stage you’re in a pretty bad shape and also seriously dehydrated.

I sometimes feel weirdly defensive on part of bodybuilders, even though I really don’t like that aesthetic myself, and it’s pretty damn unhealthy if you wanna go far…
But a) have a friend who’s really nice and smart who used to compete in bodybuilding at a championship level, so that’s had an influence on me, and b) most of all, I think there’s some weird homophobia or maybe just plain-old sexism underlying a lot of “haha, bodybuilders look weird and they’re really weak from their diets”. Like… it’s so un-manly to spend that much time and effort on looking a particular way. Although I think this can often be subconscious, rather than something people explicitly think. (Not directing this towards anyone in this thread, it’s more a general observation.)

Dvärghundspossen
Dvärghundspossen
1 year ago

Actually, the other day, an older professor at my department complained about how he doesn’t understand any computer stuff, and is too old to learn, but unfortunately, he never got the help he hoped for from his daughters. First, his plan was for his daughters to learn computers and then help him out with computer stuff when need be, so he bought them computer games and stuff, but they never developed a real interest. Next, he hoped that when they became teenagers, they would date computer geeks, so their boyfriends could help him out with computer stuff, but alas! they only dated football players, and none of their boyfriends ever knew the first thing about computers.

Clearly proves that the guy David cites is absolutely correct.