By David Futrelle
I don’t know what planet incels live on, but some of you ladies might want to move there, at least if you enjoy endless sex, not working, and … murder.
The latest True Fact I have gleaned from the Incels.is forums is that “The average woman lives a life comparable to a good looking male billionaire.” Who knew? But according to a prolific Incels.is commenter calling himself Getlooksordie,
All women do the same shit:
– non stop fuck and party the hottest members of the opposite sex
– constantly travel to exotic places
– everyone is always nice to them because they are female
– they are above the law (a woman can literally kill a man and only get community service)
– huge social circles with friends
– they don´t have to work if they don´t want to. Hubby will betabuxxx.
Is this true, ladies? What are you hiding from us?
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laughs nervously, looks around what the fuck?
It’s like he learned everything he knows about women and womanhood from a really bad Hollywood romcom.
Oh wait. Of course he did. He’s an incel.
headdesk
Delusional incels are also quite moronic
Sheila E is not an average woman, and also a goddess
Right, because it’s not like a man in this country can kill a child for no reason and get acquitted and a woman can fire a warning shot in self-defense and go to prison. Oh, wait.
Meh.
In some ways my life is better than an average billionaire. Not five minutes ago I just finished eating a generous hunk of focaccia that came out of my own oven only an hour ago. How many billionaires have eaten fresh focaccia in the last five minutes, I ask you?
It’s all true. I also run the deep state and personally ordered the arrest of Roger Stone today. Life is good!
I don’t even know what movie they’re watching to get these ideas from. I’m also not sure I want to know.
This is all true. Also, I’m the one funding George Soros. Good day to you all! ?
This is all true. Also, I’m the one funding George Soros. Good day to you all, ladies, gents, and other configurations of being! ?
Best piece of evidence that incels haven’t been around any women for a long while.
“travel to exotic places”
Does Florida count? I went there when my brother got his doctorate
“having non stop sex with the hottest members of the opposite sex”
Well not to brag but my Fiancé is the sexiest member of the opposite sex to me, well besides tom Hiddleston. I’ve also been with a very attractive member of the same sex as well. as for non stop sex? well that two weeks he’s home between 10 months we certainly do
“lots of friends”
I’m incredibly introverted so that sounds horrible. When I’ve talked to more then five people in one day I need to spend at least 6 hours alone.
“above the law”
If I ever have to kill someone i’ll let you know. Never done it before.
“ever one nice to them?”
I mean a lot of people yes, I’m not a jerk and try to be polite.
“they don’t have to work”
lmao okay buddo what ever you need to tell yourself. it’s 2019. not 1919. I’m sure 90% of women work some sort of paying job.
@WWTH
However did you manage it? Tell me your secret. I have been ordering the arrest of the Abomination colloquially known as Roger Stone ever since I had become aware of its existence, yet to no avail.
Even now, the fact that it has been arrested at the end of its useful life-cycle and on such a comparatively mild* charge doesn’t speak well for our organization or humanity at large.
*given its rich, long history of abuses political, fiscal, and interpersonal.
@Lainy:
It wasn’t any different in 1919. Now if you were a middle-class white woman circa 1945-1980 then maybe you could get away with not working.
@snowberry
Thank you. I meant to type 1819 but I made a typo. I know poor women have always worked. The overlooked hands that built the world.
OT: Comet Ping Pong, of Pizzagate fame, survived an attempted arson on Thursday night: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/comet-ping-pong-pizzagate-restaurant-arson-attempt-latest-updates-2019-01-25/
It’s so true about the murder. But honestly, community service is such a drag when I’d otherwise be on a fabulously exotic vacation, having non-stop sex with Chris Evans (in Captain America shape).
I mean seriously, I’m the victim here.
And sometimes I think, “maybe I should just stop with all the murdering,” but I read another post like this, and off I go!
It’s so hard being a woman, for seriously. And that’s totally what feminism is ALL about. How hard ONLY we have it, and how much better we are than men. Men are the scum of the earth, and we would just LOOOVE to strip away all of their human rights because they clearly don’t even qualify.
If men would just submit to our every whim then maybe I wouldn’t have to keep murdering them. I mean, it’s clearly their fault, that’s why I don’t go to jail for my murder sprees. All the judges know that women are only victims, and never to blame.
Because we’re perfect. DUH.
(they think it’s all true anyway, and they have no sense of humor, so what’s the harm in indulging their cognitive dissonance? Otherwise, they’d just have to make it up, and they have way too much fun with that.)
And by the way, babies ARE delicious.
I like mine with Tabasco.
…
PffffhahahahaHAHAHAHA
oh god my sides
Wow, I didn’t know any of this! Being an introvert with diminished sex drive due to drugs who’s only ever had sex with the guy she married? It’s all an elaborate false front, guys, for reals. Ditto with the most exotic place I’ve been in the past two years being Salem, Oregon. I kid, I kid, folks, I was actually in the Maldives, having nonstop orgies with a horde of Jason Momoa clones.
Having a job to pay off my student loans? Nope, my betabux schlub of a hubby was being duped into taking the whole load, while speaking of loads, me and the Jason clones… oops, TMI.
They have me FOUND OUT.
(Seriously, what realm do these jokers inhabit? It really must be the world of bad romcoms, because no woman I know does any of this.)
@jone (social justice cleric)
And I mean, it’s not like some of us men wouldn’t be willing to take the murdering off your hands for a bit. But will you let us? Nooooooooooo. Keep all the fun for yourselves…
It’s like how I can never find any bonbons in the stores, because you’ve taken them all, and even the bonbon mines have been stripped clean so I can’t even get any on the black market from one of the poor innocent men you’ve got stuck working there. Yeah, feminists complain about women stripping all the time, but who ever pays attention to the poor men stripping the bonbon mines, huh? huh?
Though of course, it’s not like I’d ever want a bonbon, since as a male I am Sooper Manly and only eat raw mammoth steak that I’ve hunted myself. But it’s the principle of the thing.
Y’okay. Point for point, here we go…
Well, we’re off to a roaring start already. CITATION NEEDED.
LOLwut? Um, NO. I’m an introvert, I don’t like to party, let alone nonstop. And the hottest members of the opposite sex (at least, those I consider to be such) consistently ignore me.
Schnurk. The most exotic place I’ve been to is Germany, and that’s because I have relatives there.
No, wait, I take that back: It was Arizona, and my best friend lived there for a couple of years with his hubby. The high-desert climate was exotic to this Canadian, and did wonders for my frizzy hair and my rheumatism, also. I was especially fond of the little hummingbirds who would perch on the thorns of the ocotillo bushes (which look like bundles of dead sticks from a distance, unless they’re in bloom, in which case they look like bundles of dead sticks with red tassels on them.)
In any case, the “constantly” part is also incorrect, since whole entire years would elapse between my travels. Several of them, even.
GUFFAW. Men are actually actively NASTY to us because we’re female. Unless they’re trying to get into our pants. And if they fail at that and we don’t let them down with sufficient softness, then out comes the ol’ nasty again.
CITATION NEEDED, in the worst way. Last I looked, there were women rotting in the pen for murder charges, even when the killing was accidental or in self-defence!
Again (yawn), CITATION NEEDED. Like said, I’m an introvert. I’m a good friend, and my friends are lovely people. The best in the world, in fact. But I don’t do well with huge social circles!
Hey, where the hell is my betabuxxx husband???
Oh yeah. I’ve never even been proposed to, let alone done any proposing of my own. That might have something to do with it…
@Crip Dyke:
If you baked that focaccia yourself, you enjoyed a treat beyond the ken of most people who have people.
@Andy 707:
BURN YOUR COSMO!!!–prompted by your icon; I was an industrial-strength fan in the late 80’s. (I understand that, given the success of Voltron: Legendary Defender, Netflix is rebooting Saint Seiya/Knights of the Zodiac; any thoughts?)
I’m really misusing my woman money if I end up having to beg to make ends meet all the time. Funny how that works.
“Everyone is always nice to them because they’re female”.
Sure. It’s not as if I and absolutely every girl and woman I’ve met over the years in psychiatric and CPS/foster care system have their own accounts of horrific sexual abuse with their perpetrators never being brought to justice, despite these being the people supposed to help and support them and the other vulnerable members of society in their care. Oh, wait…
Weirwood: thank you for your service.
Oh, with this “society treats you like a princess” bullshit again.
I’ve had a pretty shitty life. I don’t talk to my family, keep any yearbooks or think back on my childhood with any nostalgia because it was all a huge shitshow. I was abused both at home and at school, and it groomed me for abusive relationships because it was my normal. Now even in my thirties when I know better and don’t take shit, I still have such huge trust issues that I am very averse to making even casual friends and have become introverted to the point of being agoraphobic. I just go to work and go home. And yes, I HAVE to work, because if I counted on the men in my life, their failure would pull me down like cement shoes.
I haven’t been posting on here in a long time because I’ve been seriously depressed.
Okay, so I’m not a lady, but i used to live as one, and i have real symmetric features, had an eating disorder and hid behind a mask of pretty dresses, high heels and light makeup. I was a super hot lady, is what I’m saying.
So i was basically always poor, though most of the time i had a semblance of a roof and access to food and running water. But I was homeless for a period. I worked all sorts of terrible, underpaid, dangerous jobs out of desperation. Lot of work. I did once save up to go to a far away country for school for a month, but it was my own money and only once.
I got a lot of offers from men, that’s true. But then i was a tiny, skinny, scared twenty year old lady with a really pretty face in a really pretty dress. The sort of men who offered me sex, were the sort of men who were into that look and approached me on the street, as i was a lonely introvert without friends, and only ever met people when i was going from place to place our working outside. I did not have sex with these men, except the one who forced me when i was homeless and he let me sleep on his floor. I now spend (my own) money and time and energy on therapy to get over that experience.
Now, as a fat, non binary, short and purple haired, mentally healthy, drag queen makeup wearing human, i do slut around town. The people joining me in this sluttery are anything but men, they are all very nice, I’m very nice, i still don’t have large amounts of money, but if i saved up i could probably go somewhere exotic. I hate heat, though. I own a cat, which makes me pretty happy, but none of this is really a millionaire life style.. dunno.
Anyway, rant over and i guess this also makes for a weird introduction. Hello fellow humans! I’ve been reading for years