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MRAs and MGTOWs are outraged that Jeff Bezos may only be the FOURTH richest man in the world after his divorce

By David Futrelle

Feminists, in addition to eating babies and occasionally saying mean things about dudes on Twitter, actually do a lot of distinctly unglamorous and often unappreciated work providing help to people who are suffering. They staff crisis hotlines, build and run domestic violence shelters that provide services for women and men, work to provide menstrual products to poor girls so that they can go to school, that sort of thing.

Men’s Right Activists and so-called “Men Going Their Own Way,” by contrast, seem to spend most of their time looking for excuses to post angry rants about women online.

Currently they’re working themselves into a lather over Jeff Bezos’ divorce, outraged that the Amazon CEO — a guy whose cartoonishly inhumane workplace practices compel many of his warehouse workers to literally pee in bottles so they won’t get penalized for taking a break — may lose so much of his money in his upcoming divorce that he’ll be reduced to being only the world’s FOURTH wealthiest billionaire.

Also, some of the MGTOWs have some, well, interesting thoughts about penises, and Jeff Bezos’ penis in particular. We’ll get to those in a moment. But first:

In the Men’s Rights subreddit, the busiest MRA forum on the internet, a post with the title “Richest Woman on Earth Did Nothing but Marry the Richest Man on Earth” has garnered an impressive 756 upvotes, at last count, despite the fact that its central claim is not, in fact, true. (MacKenzie Bezos cofounded Amazon and worked at the then-startup for a time.)

It’s not that Men’s Rights Redditors feel particularly sorry for Jeff Bezos, what with him being the world’s richest man and all. But many were clearly thrilled at the chance to denounce another divorcing women as a golddigger with a heart of ice, though they didn’t always word it quite so politely.

“[S]he didn’t earn any of it and she has to live knowing that he was the one who earned it,” complained a Redditor called ActionJackson in another Men’s Rights subreddit thread on the divorce. “[S]he just gets it because she’s a greedy bitch.”

“What a piece of shit gold digging c*nt fuck her,” added Literally_A_Gorilla in yet another MR subreddit thread.

A commenter called Christi_Tanese directed similarly spirited invective towards Jeff Bezos, crowing that a costly divorce would be poetic justice indeed for a man she blamed for “sponsor[ing] and entire media empire that openly sides with feminazis and hates on men,” and declaring that she hoped

all the idiots that shilled for feminists get destroyed by their women! Each fucker that hated on other men deserve this.

When young men get arrested for false accusations from scorned idiot women or scumbag THOTS, when adult men get divorce-raped in courts and lose their house, kids and income in favor of a cheater wife that never worked a year in her life, when all the society sees men as vile creatures, and these men with their power and their media empires attack MRAs…. then THEY DESERVE A WORLD OF SHIT!

And the most poetic and karma type of shit is to get screwed by women and by the anti-men system they supported and promoted.

Despite the vitriol, there were a surprising number of Reddit MRAs unwilling to bash MacKenzie, with some noting that she was involved in Amazon’s founding and others pointing out that Jeff was the one who was having an affair. (FWIW, though Jeff has been seeing a married Fox News anchor for some months, it’s not altogether clear if he was actually cheating on his wife; the divorce announcement noted that they were splitting after “a trial separation” and a “long period of loving exploration.”)

Meanwhile, in the Men Going Their Own Way subreddit, where the regulars have already devoted more than two dozen threads to the topic, the reaction has not been quite so measured. While most have little sympathy for Jeff — they see him as a “blue-pilled cuck” and a “simp” for being married in the first place — their hatred towards MacKenzie, and their outrage over the money she likely will be getting, is even more vitriolic than that of their MRA peers.

“The biggest gold digging c*nt ever,” declared one MGTOW Redditor. “[A] money grubbing leech,” offered another.

“All that she did was open her legs for the right man and not be a fatty,” complained a MGTOW called Blueu2.

Wildfireboat, meanwhile, suggested it was a different sexual act that had garnered her her pending windfall. “Amazing how rich women become after wrapping their mouths around a cock,” he joked.

They weren’t the only MGTOWs with sex, and penises, on their minds.

“She is the Warren Buffett of the divorce [rapes] haha,” laughed PubliusVirgilius.

Made an “investment” 25 years ago and now is cashing out. Now she will ride lots of Chad cocks.

Bi0lizard agreed:

I’m willing to bet she’ll be banging some 20-30’s year olds young hard cock before the ink is dry on the divorce papers!

“Now she’s day trading cocks instead of stocks,” joked MuaadDibJihad. “How many pool boy dicks does she have in every orifice right now?” replied LimousineLibtard. “A LOT.”

Other MGTOW Redditors, somewhat unexpectedly, suggested they might themselves be willing to engage with billionaire penis if if meant they could have some of those billions themselves.

“I don’t have a gay bone in my body,” offered SdotFray28,

but shiiiiit for $138 billion, I’ma be Jeff Bezos new wife, his nanny, barber, priest, confidant, council, best friend, driver, bodyguard, Butler, maid, toe nail clipper, cuz I know I’m about to have the meanest come up . ????

Superfunpartytime15 replied:

Yeah. Whatever to these dudes saying they wouldn’t suck a dick for money. Wait till some guy has a billion dollar check in one hand and his cock in the other.

Yes, I’m sure this is something that happens to men on the MGTOW subreddit on a daily basis.

Naturally, numerous other MGTOWs jumped into the thread to make clear, in no uncertain terms, that they wouldn’t put a penis in their mouth no matter how much money they were offered. Some got rather heated about it.

“Consider this,” wrote metallicdrama.

Someone offers you One Trillion Dollars! To suck a big fat cock. Once. You do it. You say to yourself it’s a trillion dollars! You do it. You pretend to love it because you have to. … You hate yourself but you keep going because you also keep telling yourself a trillion dollars.

He really seems to have thought this exceedingly unlikely scenario through, huh.

The whole rest of your life you have to live with what you did. Does a trillion dollars make up for it? I say no. You’ll just burn money trying to make it worthwhile but it never will be.

He’s thought about it … a lot.

Every time a woman sucks you off you’ll remind yourself you sucked cock. You will never be able to enjoy receiving a blow job from a woman again. Your life will always be tainted by that. The only way to salvage your life is to put that money into a trust and give yourself a TBI [Traumatic Brain Injury] and hope you don’t remember.

Wow.

Another MGTOW Redditor responded with one of the few sensible comments I have ever seen in all the years I’ve spent reading the MGTOW subreddit.

If sucking a dick would bother you that much, you’ve got some fucking problems, holy shit. Talk about insecurity.

Apparently MGTOWs have extremely high standards not only when it comes to trillionaire cock but also when it comes to sexual acts of any kind, at least if their comments about Jeff’s new girlfriend, former news anchor and So You Think You Can Dance host Lauren Sanchez. Here are the two of them at the Golden Globes the other night.

Reddit’s MGTOWs have collectively decreed that she is not all that, and are baffled and angry that the world’s richest man, rather than “banging” a succession of 18-year-olds, has instead opted to canoodle with what MGTOW Redditor NathanHollister called a “post-wall used up whore” who, at 49, is actually a year older than his soon-to-be-ex-wife. “Jesus,” Nathan added,

if it’s costing you $70 billion to lose your wife at least replace her with a hot little piece of ass. He can afford SOOO much better.

Other MGTOW Redditors shared this assessment of Sanchez. “[H]is new bitch is butt ugly,” sniffed Older_Miggy, who presumably has himself aged like fine wine.

But at least none of them — at least in the comments that I read — suggested actually murdering her, a courtesy Reddit’s MGTOWs did not extend to MacKenzie Bezos. More than a few hinted, none too subtly, that Jeff would probably save a lot of money if he were to have MacKenzie — his wife of 25 years and the mother of his children — quietly, er, disappeared. “With all that money couldn’t he make the problem ‘go away'” asked someone called curiouslyengaged. “Make it look like an accident,” suggested Senip69.

Others thought it was the rest of the women in America who should suffer. “This is why we need Sharia Law,” wrote eja_cool8. “No but seriously, this is why women are ruining the West.”

One MGTOW, though, had an explanation for the divorce that set aside such macro issues as the dangers of “divorce rape” and “women ruining the west” to focus on a micro issue — the fact that Jeff Bezos, standing 5′ 7″, is a couple of inches shorter than the average American man.”He’s a manlet,” LogicalAnswers flatly declared, “so it was just a matter of time.”

MGTOWs are well and truly dedicated to being wrong and horrible about every single thing in the world.

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rv97
rv97
5 years ago

Now if only I didn’t need big companies like Amazon and Google to give me DRM-free music. There’s Bandcamp, but eventually, there will come a time that my favourite music from last decade will vanish as streaming may be the only means to listening to music.

Aside from that the Amazon employees need another job – fast.

Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
5 years ago

Whatever…

I honestly don’t care what these idiots think of either party to the divorce. I honestly don’t care about the divorce. I’ve never even SEEN an episode of “Real Housewives of Silicon Valley”

Chris Oakley
5 years ago

Personally I’m more concerned about the dick pics than Bezos’ net worth. If I were on the Amazon board of directors, I’d be pushing VERY hard for a new CEO.

kupo
kupo
5 years ago

@rv97
Cool cool cool. As long as people’s labor is being exploited for your benefit, you’re fine with it.

Wwaxwork
Wwaxwork
5 years ago

Remind me again how she made him have an affair & ruin their marriage?

Mexican Hot Chocolate
Mexican Hot Chocolate
5 years ago

There are legitimate reasons to criticize Bezos and Amazon (harsh working conditions, the much publicized raise doesn’t apply to contract labor, for example) but his divorce isn’t one of them. These jokers should do themselves a favor and look up the concept of community property.

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

I wondered how the manosphere would take this news. On the one hand, as Trump fans, they have to hate Jeff Bezos. On the other hand, women are bad and evil. Quite a conundrum!

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
5 years ago

“This is why we need Sharia Law,”

Not sure they’d like that either.

In sharia law, the groom pays the bride something called a mahr.

That’s a sum of money and/or other property. It immediately becomes the wife’s irrecoupable property; and she gets to keep it if there’s a divorce.

(English courts generally uphold such arrangments as a species of pre-nup)

Moggie
Moggie
5 years ago

I don’t care how troubled your marriage is, nobody should be seeing anyone from Fox News. That’s over the line.

Jane Done
Jane Done
5 years ago

@Alan Robertshaw

Not sure they’d like that either.

They wouldn’t like anything. These people are so delusional they desire a patriarchal state magnitudes more corrupt and vicious than has ever existed in history yet magically without any of the downsides for mediocre, lazy guys like themselves. Even dictators have to at least try a little.

OT, but speaking of delusional, the president is getting worse and worse every month, yet what’s most terrifying of all is how angry the right is with him for not being ludicrous enough. It seems like there is no way of stopping things from getting ugly in a big, international way, especially with authoritarianism and fascism on the rise globally.

travel4066
travel4066
5 years ago

MRA’s: I don’t see why women are so serious about date rape/marital rape. It would be uncomfortable for a while but women should just suck it up and get over it. They’re basically getting coerced then changing their minds, making up the rape later on… those dumb bitches, grrrrr!

Also MRA’s: If I sucked a dick while coerced by a billion/trillion dollars it would destroy my ability to enjoy anything ever again for the rest of my life!!! My only hope would be a severe case of retrograde amnesia!!!

Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
5 years ago

@ Wwaxwork:

Remind me again how she made him have an affair & ruin their marriage?

Just remember ir this way: “Women Bad, Men Good”

@ Jane Done:

It seems like there is no way of stopping things from getting ugly in a big, international way, especially with authoritarianism and fascism on the rise globally.

What scares me most about that is the religious fundamentalist idea thet “god will protect us, so we can break anything we want”

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
5 years ago

@ Jane Done

Even dictators have to at least try a little

“You can’t rule the world in hiding. You’ve got to come out on the balcony sometimes and wave a tentacle.”

~ (4th) Doctor Who

KindaSortaHarmless
KindaSortaHarmless
5 years ago

@weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

I wondered how the manosphere would take this news. On the one hand, as Trump fans, they have to hate Jeff Bezos. On the other hand, women are bad and evil. Quite a conundrum!

I was wondering about that. I’m not sure I’m happy to know the answer.

Susan
Susan
5 years ago

They man crisis hotlines

Sorry to be a pedant, DF, but how about they “staff” or “operate” or “keep open” or “run” crisis hotlines?

Valkyrine
Valkyrine
5 years ago

Ugh. “a hot little piece of ass”? The “little” in there just makes me gag, it’s so predatory. The rest of it is dehumazing shit too, but that’s the part that tells me this guy is one of those dudes who insist that they are “ephebophile” and that it’s totally normal.

Cat Mara
5 years ago

I’m torn between finding it amusing or pathetic that these guys are incapable of conceiving of connecting with a woman on any level but the physical, and are apparently just flapping about in front of their computers going, “parp, parp, does not compute” with steam coming out of their ears…

PocketNerd
PocketNerd
5 years ago

Thus Spake ZaraValkyrine:

Ugh. “a hot little piece of ass”? The “little” in there just makes me gag, it’s so predatory. The rest of it is dehumazing shit too, but that’s the part that tells me this guy is one of those dudes who insist that they are “ephebophile” and that it’s totally normal.

Yah. The subtext seems to be “I don’t understand why he doesn’t just fly to some impoverished nation and rape 14-year-olds, because that’s what I’d do if I were rich enough. Because that’s totally normal.”

(Now please excuse me; after typing that I feel like I need a shower.)

Kevin
Kevin
5 years ago

@ Susan

My octogenarian dad’s take on a similar issue to the one you raise was that ‘staff/staffed/staffing’ would be the appropriate usage in a civilian context, with variations on ‘manned’ being more appropriate to military contexts. I’m aware that time has passed since he was taught that, and developments have overtaken the latter part of it.

Valkyrine
Valkyrine
5 years ago

@PocketNerd
What does “Zara” mean? @.@

CarrieV
CarrieV
5 years ago

I absolutely love when highly successful men do the exact opposite of what MRAs/MGTOWs insist to be the only right way to be successful.

I also love when they say that this or that reason puts a woman past The Wall and ergo she’ll never have a chance at ever, ever, ever getting dick again, then they whine when these post-wall trollops only get better and better dick.

*Sorry to use callous language, I was trying to kind of mirror them and their callous language.

kupo
kupo
5 years ago

@Kevin

I’m aware that time has passed since he was taught that, and developments have overtaken the latter part of it.

Then why bring it up? It has changed. The appropriate term is no longer “manned”. Period.

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
5 years ago

I love it when the manosphere puts their authoritarian spin on a news story. Who (at least seemingly) has the power? A white man? Yay!

Not a white man? Let’s use hateful language to describe this person! Yay!

Dalillama
Dalillama
5 years ago

@Valkyrine
Faux-pretentiousness. Thus Spoke Zarathusa is a Nietzche book.

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