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MRAs and MGTOWs are outraged that Jeff Bezos may only be the FOURTH richest man in the world after his divorce

By David Futrelle

Feminists, in addition to eating babies and occasionally saying mean things about dudes on Twitter, actually do a lot of distinctly unglamorous and often unappreciated work providing help to people who are suffering. They staff crisis hotlines, build and run domestic violence shelters that provide services for women and men, work to provide menstrual products to poor girls so that they can go to school, that sort of thing.

Men’s Right Activists and so-called “Men Going Their Own Way,” by contrast, seem to spend most of their time looking for excuses to post angry rants about women online.

Currently they’re working themselves into a lather over Jeff Bezos’ divorce, outraged that the Amazon CEO — a guy whose cartoonishly inhumane workplace practices compel many of his warehouse workers to literally pee in bottles so they won’t get penalized for taking a break — may lose so much of his money in his upcoming divorce that he’ll be reduced to being only the world’s FOURTH wealthiest billionaire.

Also, some of the MGTOWs have some, well, interesting thoughts about penises, and Jeff Bezos’ penis in particular. We’ll get to those in a moment. But first:

In the Men’s Rights subreddit, the busiest MRA forum on the internet, a post with the title “Richest Woman on Earth Did Nothing but Marry the Richest Man on Earth” has garnered an impressive 756 upvotes, at last count, despite the fact that its central claim is not, in fact, true. (MacKenzie Bezos cofounded Amazon and worked at the then-startup for a time.)

It’s not that Men’s Rights Redditors feel particularly sorry for Jeff Bezos, what with him being the world’s richest man and all. But many were clearly thrilled at the chance to denounce another divorcing women as a golddigger with a heart of ice, though they didn’t always word it quite so politely.

“[S]he didn’t earn any of it and she has to live knowing that he was the one who earned it,” complained a Redditor called ActionJackson in another Men’s Rights subreddit thread on the divorce. “[S]he just gets it because she’s a greedy bitch.”

“What a piece of shit gold digging c*nt fuck her,” added Literally_A_Gorilla in yet another MR subreddit thread.

A commenter called Christi_Tanese directed similarly spirited invective towards Jeff Bezos, crowing that a costly divorce would be poetic justice indeed for a man she blamed for “sponsor[ing] and entire media empire that openly sides with feminazis and hates on men,” and declaring that she hoped

all the idiots that shilled for feminists get destroyed by their women! Each fucker that hated on other men deserve this.

When young men get arrested for false accusations from scorned idiot women or scumbag THOTS, when adult men get divorce-raped in courts and lose their house, kids and income in favor of a cheater wife that never worked a year in her life, when all the society sees men as vile creatures, and these men with their power and their media empires attack MRAs…. then THEY DESERVE A WORLD OF SHIT!

And the most poetic and karma type of shit is to get screwed by women and by the anti-men system they supported and promoted.

Despite the vitriol, there were a surprising number of Reddit MRAs unwilling to bash MacKenzie, with some noting that she was involved in Amazon’s founding and others pointing out that Jeff was the one who was having an affair. (FWIW, though Jeff has been seeing a married Fox News anchor for some months, it’s not altogether clear if he was actually cheating on his wife; the divorce announcement noted that they were splitting after “a trial separation” and a “long period of loving exploration.”)

Meanwhile, in the Men Going Their Own Way subreddit, where the regulars have already devoted more than two dozen threads to the topic, the reaction has not been quite so measured. While most have little sympathy for Jeff — they see him as a “blue-pilled cuck” and a “simp” for being married in the first place — their hatred towards MacKenzie, and their outrage over the money she likely will be getting, is even more vitriolic than that of their MRA peers.

“The biggest gold digging c*nt ever,” declared one MGTOW Redditor. “[A] money grubbing leech,” offered another.

“All that she did was open her legs for the right man and not be a fatty,” complained a MGTOW called Blueu2.

Wildfireboat, meanwhile, suggested it was a different sexual act that had garnered her her pending windfall. “Amazing how rich women become after wrapping their mouths around a cock,” he joked.

They weren’t the only MGTOWs with sex, and penises, on their minds.

“She is the Warren Buffett of the divorce [rapes] haha,” laughed PubliusVirgilius.

Made an “investment” 25 years ago and now is cashing out. Now she will ride lots of Chad cocks.

Bi0lizard agreed:

I’m willing to bet she’ll be banging some 20-30’s year olds young hard cock before the ink is dry on the divorce papers!

“Now she’s day trading cocks instead of stocks,” joked MuaadDibJihad. “How many pool boy dicks does she have in every orifice right now?” replied LimousineLibtard. “A LOT.”

Other MGTOW Redditors, somewhat unexpectedly, suggested they might themselves be willing to engage with billionaire penis if if meant they could have some of those billions themselves.

“I don’t have a gay bone in my body,” offered SdotFray28,

but shiiiiit for $138 billion, I’ma be Jeff Bezos new wife, his nanny, barber, priest, confidant, council, best friend, driver, bodyguard, Butler, maid, toe nail clipper, cuz I know I’m about to have the meanest come up . ????

Superfunpartytime15 replied:

Yeah. Whatever to these dudes saying they wouldn’t suck a dick for money. Wait till some guy has a billion dollar check in one hand and his cock in the other.

Yes, I’m sure this is something that happens to men on the MGTOW subreddit on a daily basis.

Naturally, numerous other MGTOWs jumped into the thread to make clear, in no uncertain terms, that they wouldn’t put a penis in their mouth no matter how much money they were offered. Some got rather heated about it.

“Consider this,” wrote metallicdrama.

Someone offers you One Trillion Dollars! To suck a big fat cock. Once. You do it. You say to yourself it’s a trillion dollars! You do it. You pretend to love it because you have to. … You hate yourself but you keep going because you also keep telling yourself a trillion dollars.

He really seems to have thought this exceedingly unlikely scenario through, huh.

The whole rest of your life you have to live with what you did. Does a trillion dollars make up for it? I say no. You’ll just burn money trying to make it worthwhile but it never will be.

He’s thought about it … a lot.

Every time a woman sucks you off you’ll remind yourself you sucked cock. You will never be able to enjoy receiving a blow job from a woman again. Your life will always be tainted by that. The only way to salvage your life is to put that money into a trust and give yourself a TBI [Traumatic Brain Injury] and hope you don’t remember.

Wow.

Another MGTOW Redditor responded with one of the few sensible comments I have ever seen in all the years I’ve spent reading the MGTOW subreddit.

If sucking a dick would bother you that much, you’ve got some fucking problems, holy shit. Talk about insecurity.

Apparently MGTOWs have extremely high standards not only when it comes to trillionaire cock but also when it comes to sexual acts of any kind, at least if their comments about Jeff’s new girlfriend, former news anchor and So You Think You Can Dance host Lauren Sanchez. Here are the two of them at the Golden Globes the other night.

Reddit’s MGTOWs have collectively decreed that she is not all that, and are baffled and angry that the world’s richest man, rather than “banging” a succession of 18-year-olds, has instead opted to canoodle with what MGTOW Redditor NathanHollister called a “post-wall used up whore” who, at 49, is actually a year older than his soon-to-be-ex-wife. “Jesus,” Nathan added,

if it’s costing you $70 billion to lose your wife at least replace her with a hot little piece of ass. He can afford SOOO much better.

Other MGTOW Redditors shared this assessment of Sanchez. “[H]is new bitch is butt ugly,” sniffed Older_Miggy, who presumably has himself aged like fine wine.

But at least none of them — at least in the comments that I read — suggested actually murdering her, a courtesy Reddit’s MGTOWs did not extend to MacKenzie Bezos. More than a few hinted, none too subtly, that Jeff would probably save a lot of money if he were to have MacKenzie — his wife of 25 years and the mother of his children — quietly, er, disappeared. “With all that money couldn’t he make the problem ‘go away'” asked someone called curiouslyengaged. “Make it look like an accident,” suggested Senip69.

Others thought it was the rest of the women in America who should suffer. “This is why we need Sharia Law,” wrote eja_cool8. “No but seriously, this is why women are ruining the West.”

One MGTOW, though, had an explanation for the divorce that set aside such macro issues as the dangers of “divorce rape” and “women ruining the west” to focus on a micro issue — the fact that Jeff Bezos, standing 5′ 7″, is a couple of inches shorter than the average American man.”He’s a manlet,” LogicalAnswers flatly declared, “so it was just a matter of time.”

MGTOWs are well and truly dedicated to being wrong and horrible about every single thing in the world.

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PocketNerd
PocketNerd
5 years ago

Was Byron Hall by any chance the perpetrator of F.A.T.A.L.? The game with rolls for penis size (one each for length and circumference), and hundreds of pages of incantations searched-and-replaced only to vary the name of the demon lord addressed, and cursed armors that transformed the user into one of several insulting racial stereotypes? The game that had the air of having been written by Eric Cartman?

Dat’s der bunny.

Also it had roving rape gangs, which were somehow a normal and accepted thing in this “historically accurate” game.

vaiyt
5 years ago

I don’t think a game where you can roll a character that constantly farts as loud as thunder can be mentioned in the same breath as “historically accurate”.

Full Metal Ox
5 years ago

@vaiyt:

I don’t think a game where you can roll up a character that constantly farts as loud as thunder can be mentioned in the sand breath as “historical accuracy.”

…You mean to tell me Blazing Saddles lied to us?

Rabid Rabbit
Rabid Rabbit
5 years ago

@Buttercup Q. Skullpants

Penises ruin everything they touch, forever

You do wonder how they deal with having penises. I mean, surely their penises have touched their thighs on occasion, not to mention constantly touching their hands. Shouldn’t they be cutting those body parts off because they’ve been infected?

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
5 years ago

@Full Metal Ox:

Must-have add-ons for anyone doing research using google:

https://github.com/bijij/ViewImage
https://github.com/palant/searchlinkfix

The first one should fix your image search problems.

Full Metal Ox
5 years ago

@Surplus to Requirements:

Thank you; I’ll have to give those a try. (The process of eroding creatorship into Trad and Anon has always existed, but the Internet has accelerated it.)

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
5 years ago

“Trad and Anon”?

Full Metal Ox
5 years ago

@Surplus to Requirements:

Trad. and Anon. are abbreviations for “Traditional” and “Anonymous”, designating works whose authorship is unknown, unrecoverable, and often collective and mutating; for example, you’ll often see folk songs designated thus. (Somebody somewhere must originally have composed “Greensleeves”, but good luck tracking them down without a TARDIS and an incredible amount of serendipity.)

Trad and Anon’s body of work is generally regarded as public domain, so there can be an economic incentive either to stake copyright claim to a folk work (1) or to sand off its traceable authorship (the estate of South African Zulu composer Solomon Angela finally succeeded in winning royalties for Disney’s use of”The Lion Sleeps Tonight.”)

(1) As Nick Roubanis may have done with “Misirlou”–a Greek song perhaps best known as the theme toPulp Fiction and the raw material for the Black-Eyed Peas’ ‘Pump It”, as well as a standard–at a less frantic tempo–for belly dancers and at Big Fat Ethnic Weddings.

tohka
tohka
5 years ago

Mgtows and mras wanting Jeff to kill off his wife of 25 years and mother to his 4 children. Thats evil, obviously far more so than divorce but they’ll never see it considering these guys lack empathy and hate women.

Also big (no) surprise that men’s rights activists turn a blind eye to Amazon’s horrific working conditions (as many of those workers are men) to focus on the real issue, divorce and settlement of thr world’s richest man and the evil post wall woman.

Katamount
Katamount
5 years ago

Leave it to the MGTOWs not to pose the obvious question of “Why should any one person have that much money at all?” in lieu of another obvious excuse for misogyny.