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By David Futrelle
The weirdly popular NoFap anti-masturbation movement promises men that they can have more energy, achieve greater mental clarity and even think more creatively if they can just manage to keep their hands off of their equipment for an extended period of time.
But I just spent a few hours looking through dozens and dozens of anti-fapping memes on NoFap.com, the NoFap subreddit, and elsewhere on the internet and I have to say that evidence of this alleged new creativity is nowhere to be found.
I’ve certainly looked at more than my share of terrible memes over the years from MRAs and MGTOWs and even incels, but I’ve never seen memes quite so relentlessly uninspired, and painfully earnest, as the memes the NoFappers pound out. The meme formats are tired, the cultural references are decades out of date; the jokes are nonexistent; they’re the meme world equivalent of Christian Rock.
I mean, seriously, look at this shit.
Apparently none of these dudes have gotten the memo that memes are supposed to be funny. Do they think that meme templates are themselves so inherently hilarious that you can just type out pretty much anything you want on them and it will automatically converted into humor if it makes some vague reference to the source of the meme?
It doesn’t help when NoFappers work their own weird acronym-heavy lingo into the memes, rendering them incomprehensible to anyone outside their little internet circle-no-jerk.
In case you’re wondering, PMO stands for “porn/masturbation/orgasm,” and PIED stands for “Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction.” And, yes, NoFappers actually do call themselves “Fapstronauts.”
Some NoFap memes are barely memes at all.
Still, there are a handful of NoFap memes that verge on funny, intentionally or possibly unintentionally.
That second one could be a joke, though.
This meme gets a point for having a funny picture of a cute animal in it, but loses two points for whining about porn like a fundamentalist.
Parody NoFap memes are about a hundred times as funny as the real ones.
Let’s just take a second to fully appreciate the level of failure in these memes — except that last one, and maybe the one about hands full of penis.
I mean, how unfunny and uninspired do you have to be to fuck up a masturbation joke? Masturbation is awkward, embarrassing, and almost always undignified, and yet it’s something that the vast majority of us have done (if we’re not actively doing it right this very moment); it’s pretty much the definition of funny.
It’s almost as though that whole NoFap thing about greater creativity and mental acuity is a bunch of complete bullshit.
Seriously, I’m starting to think that they’re just jerking us around.