By David Futrelle
Sometimes it’s hard to tell if the incel obsession with “Jailbait” stems from their pedophile — sorry, I mean ephebophile — fantasies, or if they’re just looking for an excuse to suggest that all the adult men out there having sex with adult women are secretly as sad and pathetic as incels are.
Take, for example, this post today on Incels.is — a backup site for Incels.me, which has apparently been booted from the internet by its domain provider — setting forth the proposition that “if you miss out on teenage love, you are an incel for life tbh.”
Here’s the full text, if you want to avoid eyestrain:
OverBeforeItBegan
Highest inhib BDDcel
–
Joined
Jul 26, 2018
Messages
827
Today at 5:32 PM#1Getting some ancient 25 year old (at best) used up slut that is looking for a “safe man” after highschool/ college Chads and Tyrones are done using her holes is the equivalent of escortcelling. You might still get the occasional sex but it will be nowhere near the same as to what superior men got while you get the degraded version of your girlfriend/wife. She’ll just be reminiscing about her youth and the countless Chad cocks she got plowed by.
No love is as pure as Teenage Stacy worshiping your dick. You cannot make up lost time.
The one good thing about this is watching cucktears copers [i.e. commenters on the IncelTears subreddit] saying things like “i’m happy I met my wife when she was 30 years old because she’s more mature now and gives me better handjobs because of her experience “
You can feel their pain from their posts.
I suppose there’s a a third possible explanation here: that OverBeforeItBegan is trying to convince himself that his Incels.me handle is an accurate one by “proving” that there’s nothing he can do to make his life better so he might as well just wallow in misery forever.
Of course, it’s also possible that the correct answer is “all of the above” — that OverBeforeItBegan is a pedophile-sorry-ephebophile who wants to think most men are secretly as miserable as he is and that nothing will ever make anything better for any of them.
I’m not sure I’ve ever encountered a social movement quite so devoted to making (and keeping) everyone involved in it feeling miserable, bitter, and hopeless.
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Wait… they’re incels, how would they even know if this is true?
I like incels. They make my life seem so joyous. I mean, sure, I’ve never been in a relationship either, but I do things! I have goals and stuff! I don’t have time (or desire, really) to wallow in bitterness on the internet, so I must be doing pretty good. Viva la vida aburrido!
Seriously, I don’t know how you can follow this stuff. This is miserable, depressing shit.
damn, what a miserable bunch
Dear Incel Penthouse,
Is the reverse also true? For example, Mr. Pants had steadfastly avoided my romantic overtures in high school, then briefly succumbed to them in college, then ran away in a fit of pique and wandered about for ten years, falling in and out of love with half a dozen other women, while I did much the same (though only some of mine were women), until the alleged wall was due on the horizon. At this time, Mr. Pants hurried back with his own overtures and was admitted back into the fold, whence he hasn’t strayed since. Is he secretly pining for Stacy? Or am I the Stacy he went back to? I need to know because I derive my whole understanding of life from the words of solipsistic garbage trolls with negative canthal tilt (who are not James Franco).
Incels could be used to illustrate the concept of a crab pot.
David, I hope you get lots of cuddles from your cats after having to read this garbage.
went thru the bargain bin dvds at walmart, and WOW, “Purple Rain”!!
though it’s theater run was during the undoubtedly worst year of my life,
What a movie! What an artist!!
WHAT A SONG!!!!!
‘scuse me, all, I gotta go for a drive and listen to that song again at disfiguring volume!!!
There’s a common thread in some US movies, and some anime, where the high school years are foregrounded as the most important of a person’s life.
It’s deeply sad. Our incel here seems to subscribe religiously to this idea.
There must be a word for what these guys are doing. They are like a cult built around self loathing and self pity. What is this called?
.. ancient 25 year olds ..
Here, in this eternal darkness, where time has gone on so long it has ceased to have meaning, I, an Ancient Creature, one of the Old Ones, as old as time itself, from before time..
Am 40 years old.
Conversely, I seem to be a young jailbait nymph in the eyes of (lecherous) senior citizens.
It must be some kind of time disturbance or something.
@Mish
maybe it’s a generational thing, but yeah I definitely remember that concept being fervently preached to us, though I knew it was total bullshit, as did anyone I talked with who was also a bully victim.
Even if teenage Bina (not Stacy, Bina — me, not some generic feeeeemoid) had been sexually active, literally the last thing in the world she’d have worshipped was any dude’s dick. My wildest fantasies ended well short of that.
Also, I wasn’t a fucking idolater. Or a fool. Unlike these guys, who are clearly both. They have the most wildly out-of-touch conception of “reality” ever. Dicks are literally the most underwhelming thing about men. Nobody worships that, literally OR figuratively — except maybe the most solipsistic and immature dudes. I.e., these guys.
And they wonder why they’re “incels”? As usual, volasshole is the correct term.
So I suppose my trans, pansexual ass is the Chaddest of Chad’s to them? I was never really without a girlfriend during high school, and have not been without a partner for more than a few months at a go since a month after my 15th birthday.
But I was also a video game playing, D&D running, book dwelling dweeb.
How can both be true?
“I didn’t get the life I wanted to have when I was sixteen. It’s not like I’m interested in anything that happens after that.”
Welp, it’s a point of view.
Excuse me, but can you please get me some AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! With a side of AAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!
@Walter
They’re called hopeless cases that are too cowardly to kill themselves in spite of insisting they have no reason to keep living. Really, by their own logic they ought to have stopped whining and just crawled into a hole to die already.
“Oh boo hoo why didn’t people worship muh teenage pee pee :(“
We interrupt this incel mocking to bring you the following special bulletin….
THE RED SOX ARE GOING TO THE WORLD SERIES!!!!!!!!!!!!
We now return you to your regularly scheduled incel mocking.
@Chris Oakley
Huh, I didn’t expect that of all things. Then again I didn’t expect Gritty the hockey antifa icon to be a thing either.
Digital self-harm.
H/T to ContraPoints: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCNvsIonJdJ5E4EXMa65VYpA
@dashapants
I almost laughed out loud at that one—your description makes your husband sound like a particularly stubborn and/or skittish cat. XD
@Bina
Wait, seriously? I knew men tended to obsess about dicks more than women, but is it really to that extent?
Sorry for the, um, awkward question—your statement just made me really curious.
Just going to shout this out for the incels here.
I was a virgin until 21!
I’m now married to my wife of 5 years!
And we’re same age!
High school notch counting means nothing!
Mish: for a while, when I was a silly little teenage warthog, that idea made me even more miserable than usual.
“These are the best years of your life, sonny!”
“You mean… it gets WORSE?”
I am happy to instruct any younger people listening that it does not necessarily get worse.
He’s right, I’m always hearing women talking about how their heterosexual teenage sexual experiences were the most satisfying of their life and how the more experience they and their partners have, the worse the sex becomes.
Hold on.
I’m sorry, I just checked and that appears the be the absolute opposite of the truth. In fact, the vast majority of women I’ve talked to describe their teenage sex as pretty terrible and the sex they have later in life as far better.
Funny how incels manage to be wrong about literally everything. It’s quite an achievement.
I know! It’s kind of like my father is posting all over the Interwebs.
If there’s one thing I learned from living with that man, it’s the profound truth of the maxim Misery loves company.
And if Misery can’t find that company, it will try to create it out of vulnerable people.
This isn’t true of all miserable people, of course. Many of them are really nice. They’re just depressed. But some miserable people try very, very hard to bring others down to their level. Maybe it brings meaning to their lives.
So maybe it’s more true to say Some Misery loves company.