By David Futrelle
Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse, some dude drops this bit of erotic fan fiction into the comments here:
Donald, is that you? (The dude’s #IP points to Poland, so probably not, but you never know.)
Assuming this didn’t come straight from The Donald himself — hey, he used to call up newspapers under a fake name to try to convince them that Madonna had the hots for him — I have a few thoughts.
Apparently MAGA now stands for “Make America Gag Again?”
Seriously, no one other than full-blown MAGAheads want to even think about Donald Trump having sex with anyone.
Indeed, Melania herself often seems to physically recoil from his touch. Look at these pictures and tell me with a straight face that these two have a happy sex life.
I mean, come on, dude, if you’re going to try to own the libs with your sexual fantasies about the Trumps, at least try to make them slightly more plausible than a Penthouse Letter.
Then again, it’s not clear if Mr. GreatBalls understands any better than President Grab Them By The Pussy himself that sex requires the consent of both partners. Seriously, dude, no man gets to have “whatever part” of his partner’s body “he wants, whenever he wants, however he wants,” no matter how much “dragon energy” he has.
For those of you feeling a bit queasy, here’s something of a brain cleanser.
Don’t be too harsh on the poor kitty. What happened the last time YOU tried to jump on top of the fridge?
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