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By David Futrelle
So on Friday I put up a post featuring some of the exciting hate mail — well, hate comments — that I get on a regular basis. I ended the post with two short paragraphs in which I gently mocked one hate commenter who’d set forth the thesis that “women suck dick because dick built and maintained all upon the earth.”
Yesterday, I got a response from another regular would-be commenter on this blog accusing me of being obsessed with Mr. I Built Civilization With My Dick.
I devoted all of 73 words to Dick Dude’s comment; this dude’s reaction was literally twice as long. Here’s his opening paragraph:
Er, dude, the entire purpose of this blog is to track the terrible things that self-professed “real men” say and do. Hell, the whole point of journalism is to report and comment on the things that other human beings say and do.
I can’t imagine Mr. Literally Shaking would prefer it if I switched this blog to an all-memoir format, or simply used it to recall my dreams (which are entirely self-created and definitely original).
Also, dude, you’re the guy sitting around thinking about bedazzling Trump’s penis. I mean, I don’t want to kinkshame, but I’ll make an exception if your sexual fetish involves Trump and his penis in any way.
The rest of his comment is similarly penis-centric.
Wait, I’m supposed to be the obsessed one? Dude, my dick is apparently living rent-free in your head, as they say.
Oh, but things get even more ironic. The guy who tried to post this comment is a troll I banned on this blog more than a year ago. Not that the ban has really slowed his output much. Since being banned, he has tried to post 86 comments to this blog; I’ve let through maybe 20, because I thought they were sort of funny, but the overwhelming majority remain in the moderation queue. I haven’t even bothered to read most of them.
And these aren’t short comments either. They tend to run between 100 and 200 words long. Assuming an average length of 150 words, this means that the dude tried to post nearly THIRTEEN THOUSAND words worth of comments to this blog in a year, knowing that the vast majority of them wouldn’t be seen by anyone but me. (He may have posted more under different IP addresses but I’m too lazy to go back through the mod queue to determine if this is the case.)
In any case, I don’t think I’m the obsessed one here.
God, what kind of sad life has this guy got when he puts a quarter of a NaNoWriMo project a year on this?
Of course, this could be how he gets off. I know saying filthy things to other people, especially when it’s unprompted and unwanted, is a paraphilia. I forget the name.
NOTICE ME SENPAI!!!
I was going to make a joke about Mr Al, he of the more than a hundred friggin’ socks over more than seven friggin’ years, but the “Sodomites” bit screams NWOSlave. Oh man, please tell me it’s NWOSlave.
So, so, many potential band (or brand) names in this bizarre screed. Where to even start?
Butt Thrusting Sodomites
Organic Candle Co Op
Flabby Bean Boy
Some kind of a word search puzzle could be worked off of this mess. It reads as if it is one.
If only he used his stamina for good instead of evil.
Maybe it’s MGTOWabunga. This seems a bit much even for him, tho’.
Why would you keep trying to post over and over after you’ve been banned? It’s not like this is a huge social media platform. It’s just a blog. Why the desperate desire to comment here if you’re not wanted?
This is why I’m pretty convinced that Miggy is indeed MRAL. He also worked overtime to evade his ban.
Move on, chap. You’re a grown ass man now.
Someone’s got an oddly focused case of hypergraphia. That’s dedication if nothing else I suppose.
Godzilla,
Thanks for the word of the day! And speaking of words, do the migs still use “mangina””? I see forms of “soy boy” used much more frequently these days.
“His presidency’s manly penis?”
I just threw up in my mouth a lot.
To be honest, I hope it is either MRAL or NWOslave. If they don’t show up every few months, I start getting worried about them. The way you get worried if the local drunk screaming at the corner every weekend isn’t there one week.
@Z&T – Is it too late to call dibs on “Organic Candle Co Op”? I kind of love it.
TW: Discussion of rape
Speaking of obsession — but admittedly in an off-topic kind of way — I’m pretty obsessed with the Kavanaugh debacle. There is now new, new info, and I can’t wait to see what develops.
Michael Avenatti Implicates Kavanaugh in Pattern of Teenage Sexual Assault
By Adam K. Raymond
http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2018/09/avenatti-implicates-kavanaugh-in-pattern-of-sexual-assault.html
TW: Discussion of rape
@Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Jesus Fucking Christ this country.
I really, really hope this is finally enough to sink Kavanaugh.
I know the top miscreants in the party (Grassley, Graham, McConnell, Hatch) will stay true, but at least red/purple state Dems have plenty of cover to vote no and purple state Republicans might find the political risk of voting yes too great.
Unfortunately, they still have time even if there’s a blue wave to “ram” another nominee through in the lame duck session.
@Ooglyboggles, WWTH
With any luck, this is the end for this particular golden boy.
OTOH, I’d love to hear this testimony!
Wow, what a shocking new headline:
“Wealthy and well-connected white man who advocates against women’s reproductive rights turns out to have victimized and abused women for years… and may actually eventually face some kind of consequence for it!”
I mean, that last part may actually succeed in shocking me, if it does indeed come to pass. I’m not holding my breath, though. I give even odds of the Republicans just not giving a damn and putting this rapist jackass on the highest court of the county anyway.
If not him, then it’ll probably another rapist who’s just slightly better at covering his tracks. /cynicism
Part of me wants to see it too. I especially want to see Kamala Harris and Maisie Hirono set loose on him.
I also think the longer this drags out, the less time they’ll have to get a nominee through.
But for the sake of his victims and other survivors who have had their wounds reopened by reading all this, it’d be for the best if he withdraws.
Well, I mean, I relaly hope he doesn’t get on the Supreme Court, but if he withdraws, the worst that happens to him is that he doesn’t get a promotion. That seems… well, about the best one could hope for. Still, I liked that article in WaPo with the guy awkwardly remembering what those preppy schools were like.
I’m curious, as a non-USAian: though after the Garland deferrals, I don’t put anything past McConnell, would the Republicans actually dare force a nominee through during the lame duck session? I mean, yes, I believe they’d dare try, but just how bad would things get if they did?
@weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee
Yeah the longer this drags out the worse the mental toll on all of his victims. How unfortunate that we are in a situation where the remaining GOP members in the Senate seem to be taking their sweet time in their voting decision. I hate how we have to rely on Collins, Flake and Murkowski to vote no instead of just having the Dems as a whole vote “no” and be done with the matter.
@Rabid Rabbit
Riot on the streets probably.
I am definitely naming some artwork after those, Z&T
@Z&T
Band names, but also album titles too.
“Soy, Sodomy & The Organic Candle Co-op” sounds like a millenial reworking of The Pogues’ 1985 classic Rum, Sodomy & The Lash.
If these “our dicks built everything” la-la-landers are this guy’s idea of real, I don’t want to know what he’d call fake.
Imma leave this here:
*sigh* You know, there are times that I wonder what it is that motivates this kind of mindless shitposting and how self-aware the shitposter is. Because I spend a lot of time self-reflecting. A lot. I’ve had Mammotheers here steer me right when I was overly critical of works like Twilight and I’ve kept that criticism close to the heart. I know what I do right, I know what I do wrong, and I definitely know where it is that I need to shake myself out of complacency, even if I haven’t worked up the courage to pull the trigger on things.
But I keep on keepin’ on. And if there’s something to say, sometimes I do it with verbal irony (read: sarcasm) thinking that it’s better at getting the point across, like on Twitter where it’s limited in character length. But I’ll usually follow it up with an explanation of what I’m thinking. Because I actually think things are important. It’s not some kind of abstract game of e-peen measuring, it’s real concepts and policies that impact real people. I went on a multi-post Twitter rant last week about how shortsighted the opponents of Ontario’s Green Energy Act are and how they’re poisoning the well with regards to any discussion about renewable energy. Because that matters to me. What kind of person writes 86 times to the same blog that banned him about “soibois” and other nonsense like this?! All that effort could be put to something far more constructive.
Ah well, guess I’d better read up on my new city council Ward and its various candidates… I was too young to pay attention to amalgamation, but damn, I am not letting a soul forget that the Tories pulled this crap.