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New Incel Theory: Women don’t use “pussy mouthwash” because “letting Chad’s load rot in there is a huge turn on”

Uh oh

By David Futrelle

It’s Friday! So let me just ruin your weekend in advance by making you read this horrible thing from the Incels.me forum containing the phrase “pussy mouthwash.”

[Hypocrisy] Why do women think they dont EVER have to wash their pussy Thread starterTotal Imbecile Start dateToday at 1:30 AM Total Imbecile Total Imbecile Legend - JoinedDec 19, 2017 Messages3,917 Today at 1:30 AM#1 The most common arguments I hear are "muh pH, and "muh bacterial culture" but that same argument could apply to your mouth yet all of us brush their teeth at least once a day Im baffled that there doesnt exist at least some sort of pussy mouthwash whose pHd matches that of a cunt and that doesnt kill "the good bacteria" Tbh I wouldnt be surprised if the truth is that women dont wanna wash their cunt because letting Chads load sit in there and rot is a huge turn on for them

Because WHAT is “huge turn on for them?”

Amazingly, the discussion that followed this, er, problematic series of assertions somehow managed to get even worse.

While a few bold incels dared to point out that women do in fact wash their vaginas, and that “pussy mouthwash” does exist in the form of douches and other “intimate hygiene” products that actually make things worse, and while one even admitted that he didn’t actually have any understanding of vaginas (” I don’t think I can even imagine what a pussy is at this point”), most commenters in the thread agreed that 1) women are gross and 2) vaginas are gross, even at a distance, with one alleged vaginal odor expert reporting that “I could smell their stank pussies when they wore skirts in school,” describing the smell as a mixture of “fish and cheese.”

There was widespread agreement that once a Chad ejaculates into a vagina his semen will remain trapped there for as long as five years, making cunnilingus something akin to a suicide mission.

As one commenter put it:

I always have the urge to throw up whenever I think about the possibility of some other man’s semen being inside of a woman whenever I might have the opportunity to go down on her. That is SO gross and nasty. Seriously, it DOES stay in there until her period rolls around, which is variable.

Another commenter declared that only

legit cucks would eat out a non virgin foid
(if she isn’t a virgin then that shit need to be power cleaned for any mouth to go near it and even then its iffy)

I’m sure that all of these fellows’ balls smell like fresh flowers.

And with that thought in mind, here are a bunch of vintage “feminine hygiene” ads I ran across while looking for a graphic for this post. Click on the pics for larger versions. Enjoy!

And here’s the full ad I clipped the header image from:

H/T — Big thanks to Twitter’s @Justincelthings, an incel-tracking ‘n’ mocking account that tweeted about this horrible discussion earlier today (and from whom I stole the screenshot of Total Imbecile’s post). If you’re on Twitter you owe it to yourself to follow this highly useful if at times horrifying account.

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Jesalin: Clit-o-centric Lesbian Goddess
Jesalin: Clit-o-centric Lesbian Goddess
2 years ago

Well, we already know they don’t know basic biology, this is just more confirmation.

PeeVee the Tired
PeeVee the Tired
2 years ago

*Rubs hand over eyes tiredly*

ShinyBlueThing
ShinyBlueThing
2 years ago

Hands up, anyone here who’s surprised by incels’ utter lack of understanding of human bodies, specifically women’s.

Hint: We brush our teeth and rinse them with mouthwash because we need teeth to eat, and not brushing them can help them rot. Women don’t have teeth in their vaginas.

Though, if these guys ever encounter a vagina in the wild, I kind of hope it does have teeth.

Gregory A Lynn
Gregory A Lynn
2 years ago

These people have literally never even met a woman. They were grown in a lab, raised entirely by men, and shown nothing but porn.

I just…how the hell are people so goddamn clueless? They want a “pussy mouthwash” that is apparently sentient enough to deserve the word “whose” and they want it to have a “pHd” that matches that of a normal human vagina.

Mimc
Mimc
2 years ago

It’s likely regular mouth wash is also doing more harm than good. Alcohol doesn’t freshen breath long term.

Aleph
Aleph
2 years ago

Sorry if I sound homophobic, but they saying that vaginas are gross reminds me of a hypothesis I came across that some Incels are very much stuck in the closet (and maybe that’s why they’re obsessed with ever powerful Chad).

Don’t know, or maybe it’s just their raging mysogyny clouding their minds and judgement like always.

Bina
2 years ago

Well, at least THIS “incel” (volasshole) picked an apt nym for himself. Proving that even if he’s aware of sweet fuck-all about women, he has some rudimentary self-awareness…

(Not bloody much of even that, though.)

Shadowplay
2 years ago

@Aleph

It’s the second one.

Laserqueen
Laserqueen
2 years ago

Well then I suppose they are advocates for condom use, as keeping the “load” out of a vagina clearly has advantages.

Jane Done
Jane Done
2 years ago

@Laserqueen

But their seed is liquid gold (just writing that made me throw up a little inside), can’t throw it away!

Wait, but gold doesn’t deteriorate….

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

Women don’t have teeth in their vaginas.

Speak for yourself.

Freemage
Freemage
2 years ago

Laserqueen: But, but, but, stretching! Everyone knows that once a woman has sex, she immediately becomes cavernous to any other man (but, weirdly, not to THAT man if she remains faithful to him).

Aleph: Let me put it this way–it’s perfectly likely that SOME of these vile scumpuppies are in the closet. Or even that they’re asexual. But there’s no particular evidence that non-heterosexuality is more common among them than the general population–at most, those who are something other than a perfect Kinsey 0 are simply more likely to remain closeted because they have such generally fucked up ideas about masculinity that they can’t accept the truth about themselves. (In other words, it’s not being in the closet that causes their toxicity, but rather, that their toxicity forces them to remain in the closet.)

Lunetta
Lunetta
2 years ago

all of us brush their teeth at least once a day

https://www.gq.com/story/brush-your-teeth-guys

Podkayne Lives
Podkayne Lives
2 years ago

I think my Pussy Riot tribute band will be called “Pussy Mouthwash”.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
2 years ago

Massengill…say, is that the delicate scent of hexachlorophene?

I think there should be some sort of pussy mouthwash with a “pHd”. These guys are always claiming you can’t fuck a diploma.

Podkayne Lives
Podkayne Lives
2 years ago

They used to talk, midcentury, of middle-class women having trouble getting pregnant. They blamed it on female psychology of course. If it was a real phenomenon, I wonder if anyone has ever considered the role that encouraging women to douche with Lysol might have played. Jesus Christ. My cooch is cringing, just thinking about it.

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
2 years ago

As always, incels are spot on. I never clean my genitals. That’s why I have a variety of coexisting infections “down there.” Damn, those infections are painful and itchy. Doesn’t matter. Not gonna change. Funky forever.

Not like incels. Nothing about them stinks.

Chris Oakley
2 years ago

@Jesalin: I doubt they can even remember what planet they’re on half the time.

LindsayIrene
2 years ago

That Zonite ad is just evil. “You can’t smell it, but to everyone else, you stink!”

Knitting Cat Lady
Knitting Cat Lady
2 years ago

So, they claim that vags are stinky.

As the lovely Dr. Jen Gunter tells us, a vagina is like a self cleaning oven. The only parts you need to actively clean are the parts you can reach with your fingers. With clear water and nothing else.

Because cleaning products make things worse.

AND ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR MAKING THINGS SMELLY!

LindsayIrene
2 years ago

Also, the ‘fish and cheese’ guy may want to go to a doctor, since he seems regularly smelling odors that don’t exist outside of his head. Maybe he has a bad sinus infection.

Ooglyboggles
Ooglyboggles
2 years ago

This is giving me more of a headache than trying to avoid the I-55 night traffic.

calmdown
calmdown
2 years ago

Wait…Lysol? It was a different formula back then right? I mean, I’m just picturing women douching with bleach, and that can’t be right? Can it?

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
2 years ago

[Hypocrisy]

comment image

I don’t think I can even imagine what a pussy is at this point

Doesn’t know what it is, what it does, what it’s like, or what he wants it for. But other people have it, and of course he’s owed it, so he’s gonna whine about it. Sounds about right

NedSparks
NedSparks
2 years ago

Actually, the Lysol was generally hinted at for anti-pregnancy and/or abortion purposes, but they were unable to come outright and say that in the ads.

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
2 years ago

Courtney
Courtney
2 years ago

@calmdown — Lysol was a different formula then, but it was even more toxic than it is now. It contained crestol until the early 50s. (http://www.hmdb.ca/metabolites/HMDB0002048).

It was marketed as a feminine hygiene product, and was used as a (not very effective) birth control method. It hurts just to think about.

Bananananana dakry: Short-Haired, Fat, and Deranged
Bananananana dakry: Short-Haired, Fat, and Deranged
2 years ago

@Ooglyboggles

Let alone the I-55 DAY traffic. I briefly lived down near the Newport Beach city line with Costa Mesa on Irvine Ave. back when I first moved to OC. The I-55 in general makes saints want to kick babies.

And my cooter just noped out of here at the idea of Lysol even near it. I’ve had enough problems with yeast infections in the past to not want to make the problem worse. Just… take regular showers, FFS. It aren’t that hard.

Moggie
Moggie
2 years ago

Knitting Cat Lady:

As the lovely Dr. Jen Gunter tells us, a vagina is like a self cleaning oven.

There you are, incels: it’d burn your dick right off! Stay away!

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
2 years ago

Rehabilitation Has Begun
#MeToo poster boys Jian Ghomeshi (Canadian Broadcasting Corporation host who made headlines way back in 2016, so he’s a proto-poster boy) and John Hockenberry (NPR host) are back!

Look for them in the New York Review of Books and Harper’s. Yuck.


They’re Here

Frida Garza
https://jezebel.com/theyre-here-1829060174

Jo
Jo
2 years ago

The only part of that which might have some basis in reality is the chap who noticed a bad smell coming from girls when he was at school. Source: I used to do a lot of classroom visits in a previous job – and have a sensitive nose.

Some teenage girls take longer to figure out personal hygiene than others, mostly underarm but there are definitely period smells on occasion. So he might just have once or twice noticed a smell coming from a girl in his class.

However, if he had a good enough nose to pick out an unfamiliar smell among the general stink of a pubescent classroom and to identify the source then there’s no way he could have failed to notice that boys at that age are three times as likely to smell – and when they do it’s usually twice as bad.

Also, he claimed that he could only smell it when the girls wore skirts which is even more obvious bullshit. If trousers/pants contained smells that come from between the legs, farts would be something culturally associated with women and Scotsmen.

Skylalalalalalala
Skylalalalalalala
2 years ago

Periods are a bit stinky (I have a very sensitive sense of smell) but the main cause of anything someone else could smell without getting *really* close seems to be pads. And even then, they’d have to be a lot closer than any of these guys have ever gotten to a feeeemale. Tampons are a close 2nd, but since they’re inside, it’s only an issue when changing them. Switched to a menstrual cup & it largely went away.

ellesar
ellesar
2 years ago

So this is the adult version of ‘girls have cooties’ and it sounds revolting. But also hilarious as they clearly have NO idea about women’s bodies. It is true, many of us DO NOT wash out our vaginas, and this is because washing it is actually WRONG if you want your vagina to stay healthy.

Do these guys get a slim bottle brush and wash out their urethra on a regular basis? Urine AND semen come out of there! But not surprisingly they do not worry about it because they know that it is not going to line the walls of the urethra for years!

ALSO, reality check Bozo’s. NOT ALL women have sex with Chad, amazing thought that may seem to you. Some of us do not even have semen in our vaginas EVER!

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
2 years ago

letting Chads load sit in there and rot

It’s not a compost bin.

and rot

It’s not a sarcophagus, either.

I do wonder, though, why they’re so obsessed with something they claim to find smelly, repellant, and worthless. Obsessed, to the point where they want government to forcibly redistribute it, otherwise they’ll snap and start murdering people. Personally, I’ve never felt that strongly about anaerobic decomposition.

Ms Vanilla Rose
2 years ago

Distant memories of “Keep the Asphidistra Flying” by George Orwell. The bit about adverts concerning “pedic perspiration”. “Pedic” wasn’t even a word, but Gordon’s bosses didn’t care, so he carried on writing the ads about women’s marriages being wrecked by their pedic perspiration.

Now that bit of the book makes sense.

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
2 years ago

@Buttercup: I do believe we are seeing a classic instance of “sour grapes” here.

Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
2 years ago

I remember seeing my mother’s douching equipment, in the 1970s, when I was a kid. I haven’t seen douching products on the shelves of any store for a long time. Of course, I haven’t been looking for them, either. They’re a relic from another time, it seems to me.

I’ve not seen any ads for them, either. Those ads are so offensive and condescending, designed as they are to play on women’s insecurities. Of course, that’s what most advertising does. Thankfully, so-called “feminine odor” products have mostly been pretty much relegated to the garbage dump of history (I hope).

Marshmallow Stacey Maximal (formerly bluecat)
Marshmallow Stacey Maximal (formerly bluecat)
2 years ago

Personally I’d be delighted if they all kept as far away from vaginas and from all those who have them and / or love them as possible.

Except I worry some of them will end up running the country, sitting on the Supreme Court, making decisions about vaginas and the people who have them and / or love them – and they STILL won’t know jackshit about them.

Elizabeth Mancz
Elizabeth Mancz
2 years ago

Clearly this guy has never heard of vagina dentata I’d love to explain the conept to him…
Maybe we need a book – “Women for Dummies”.

Kevin
Kevin
2 years ago

Thinks about strong chemicals near anyone’s genitalia. Crosses legs.

Temascos
Temascos
2 years ago

Those adverts remind me of this parody

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9swKKZy0CCM

I wonder what makes those guys so damn afraid of cunninglingus, personally I think it’s fun. I know it’s always useful to get cleaned up but I think that’s the case with any sexual activity with anyone, these dudes are just weird.

Virgin Mary
Virgin Mary
2 years ago

Incel’s favourite movie.

comment image

Ned is correct that Lysol was intended to be used as a spermicide back when condoms were oppression/illegal/anti Christian and there was no pill. Can’t help wondering how many women got cervical cancer from squirting bleach up themselves.

These douche monkeys should know what a douche is.

Dazed and confused
Dazed and confused
2 years ago

Dormousing_it

My ex flat mate was using femanin oder products when I lived with her 4 years ago

Rabid Rabbit
Rabid Rabbit
2 years ago
Rabid Rabbit
Rabid Rabbit
2 years ago

Also, I haven’t really seen this mentioned anywhere until today, and I’m not a USAian, but this seems like a serious “call your congresscritter” moment. Apparently the Violence Against Women act is set to expire: http://www.latimes.com/politics/la-na-pol-violence-against-women-expire-20180913-story.html

Pen
Pen
2 years ago

So they’re actually voluntary celibates really, what with not actually being attracted to women, and all??

Marshmallow Stacey Maximal (formerly bluecat)
Marshmallow Stacey Maximal (formerly bluecat)
2 years ago

In other horrible news, a border patrol agent has just been arrested on charges of killing four migrant women. A fifth apparently escaped. They’re charging him as a serial killer.

https://www.dallasnews.com/news/crime/2018/09/15/border-agent-suspected-serial-killer-arrested-laredo-after-5th-victim-escapes

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

That’s horrible. And I won’t be surprised if Trump pardons him.

Fabe
Fabe
2 years ago

I bet the alt-right is all ready hailing the guy as a hero.

tim gueguen
2 years ago

@Fabe, yeah, those women were probably ISIS commandos sneaking in to assassinate Trump.
/s