By David Futrelle
Sometimes the sideshow is more interesting than the main event. Consider this strange ass-ault on butt-sex porn found in the comments to a Return of Kings post titled “GLOBOHOMO RAINBOW MAFIA IS FORCING THE U.S. NATIONAL SOCCER TEAMS TO WEAR GAY PRIDE JERSEYS.”
You might wonder how any comment, no matter how absurd, could manage to upstage a post like that. Let the amateur Red Pill philosopher MCGOO show you how it’s done:
There’s an awful lot of ((anus porn)) that pops up when you turn off your browser filter, like 80% of white woman depections showing them being plugged in the ass – and instructing white males how in reality NOT to do their wife.
First off, I’m pretty sure the anti-Semitic (((echoes))) thing is supposed to have three parentheses on each side, not two, unless there’s an anti-Semitism shortage oI’m not aware of that has necessitated some sort of (((echo))) rationing.
Second of all, where exactly is all this (((anus porn))) showing up? Because I’m on the internet basically all day and all night and this stuff is not popping up for me unbidden. (I do see a lot of ads for Torrid and Lane Bryant because a friend keeps sending me links to shirts she’s thinking of buying.)
The anus porn is false sex education intended to arrest white breeding.
WHAT WHAT (in the butt)!?
Is he actually suggesting that anal porn causes what the white supremacists like to call “white genocide?” Yes. Yes he is.
IT’S THE WRONG HOLE DUMMIES.
I want this on a t-shirt.
The girls portrayed are no name non stars or celebrities, just random pretty genes out there being squandered and going to waste while they’re either earning ten bucks or they’re being given a whiff of blow.
Er, having anal sex does not preclude anyone from having sex in the front butt as well. Also, no white woman, however “pretty” her genes, is obliged to pop out white babies because some idiot internet racists want her to.
The next time some sh¡tter porn comes on my screen I’m tempted to smash it. I remember many times when I wanted to throw my TV out the window back in the 80s with all the anti cultural garbage that was televised, but this internet bung garbage is too much.
BRB, going to write a reboot of the film Network called Internetwork in which an angry Nazi neckbeard goes to the window of his mom’s basement and shouts out “I’m mad as heil and this internet bung garbage is too much!”
But let’s return to the already scheduled rant already in progress, which is about to take a strange detour into dog sex. No, not that kind of dog sex, but the sex that dogs have with each other and human legs and sometimes inanimate objects.
I’ll admit it’s always funny seeing an unnaturally small thoroughbred mini dog humping a fire hydrant – or a guest’s leg – but of course they don’t know what they’re doing becaust they’re genetic mutants. It’s mostly the unnaturally small dog breeds. Rarely do you see a large german shepherd service dog humping inanimate objects although occasionally a big retarded mutt comes along and shows he’s got some
Well, that’s enough of that. Let’s ignore the rest of the dog rant and move on.
But healthy normal sized white humans being tricked into sh¡thole poking like we see in the k*keporn??? WE’RE NOT POMERANIANS dammitt!!
Hey, speak for yourself buddy. Some of us are pomeranians.
I’m so sick of the brainwashing. It’s not a bit funny anymore.
At this point MCGOO, rather unexpectedly, turns to the subject of the post: the dreaded “globohomo” threat to manly man sports.
And enough of the rainbowization of masculine sports. These sportsmen who are the least genetically prone to being incels are being propagandized to incorrectly visualize anuses and inanimate objects for sex so as to arrest normal breeding.
Inanimate objects? Are there really a lot of pornos out there featuring dudes having sex with sex toys or, I dunno, their couch? I mean, there are plenty of pornos featuring women and sex toys — or so I’ve, er, heard — but dudes?
Mr. MCGOO ends his rant by imagining himself violently (albeit somewhat creatively) attacking a gay man. Because what better way to end a political argument than with a physically impossible hate crime?
Oooh I’d just like to shove a fire hydrant up some globohomo’s ass and a pomeranian down their throat – and then shake like a power ade drink tumbler. Then they would crap a humping pomeranian the next day right there on the corner of the sidewalk. Now THAT would be funny.
Um, what!? I think Mr. MCGOO has been drinking something a little more powerful than power-ade.
H/T — Thanks to Blue Pill Redditor BrazilianSigma for bringing Mr. MCGOO’s comment into the light of day.
Hmm, i wonder if fellation is also white genocide…
People from the north of Poland certainly are Pomeranians.
Also, I suspect if you literally search porn involving “white woman”, you’ll get mostly porn scenes revolving around racial tension as a method for degrading women.
(Recently seen on Twitter, some white supremacists played offended when they found that Google image search for “white couple” mostly yields images of interracial couples – and apparently especially prominent in media are stories of interracial couples involving a white woman and non-white man.)
@Kate:
Tell me about it. Now I’ve got it stuck in my head to the tune of “Edelweiss”:
♫♬Anus porn, anus porn
Every search I run brings thee
To my screen, so obscene
Not quite sure it’s hygienic
Folders of filth, don’t you overflow
Overflow my server
Anus porn, anus porn
Stressing the wannabe clever
♫♬
I’m so sorry…
Not going to pretend that the porn industry isn’t exploitative at times, but thinking that these actresses make 10$ off an anal scene is ludicrous. Unsurprisingly, unless a shady director tries to spring such a scene on an unexperimented actress because she might go along with it, anal scenes (especially the extreme ones i bet this guy hates-watch all the time) are higher on the pay scale. That’s why anyone is willing to do them in the first place
from the article cited by wwth…
… “my people”… that sez it
@Cat Mara
To the tune of “The Lonely Goatherd”:
♫♬
Once on the web squats an incel, butthurt:
A-nal, A-nal, Aaanal!
“Can’t stand the stuff”, but his top-ranked search word?
A-nal, a-nodl-oo!
♫♬
(Yodeling is hard to put across in writing.)
@Iseult The Idle:
I’m beginning to think these guys’ opinion of children is so low that they can’t imagine anyone conceiving them and carrying them to term voluntarily, which is why they’re so opposed to birth control, abortion, women being able to say “no” to mens’ sexual advances if they’re not interested….. only by many, many accidents can the human population be maintained….
@Jesalin: Clit-o-centric Lesbian Goddess
According to my spouse, my late FiL did try petting one once. (He was new to Canada at the time and didn’t know what it was.)
I think Mr. McGoo has the following issues:
1. Rabid anti-Semitism
2. Terrified of actually having to talk to a girl not made of polyurethane
3. Living in his mother’s basement at age 43
4. Deep into the closet
5. Probably couldn’t punch a time clock.
No. 4 comes from his obsession with practices he claims he abhors. He knows them too well….he doth protest overmuch.
i see wut u did thar
Have to say that back in the 1990s some guy actually made the radio news here when he was prosecuted for public indecency due to indulging a fetish for having sex with paved surfaces.
I think BlackBloc really laid it out best:
As internet-savvy as these guys like to think they are, if they’re actually going around thinking that when the actress looks at the camera or at her costar(s) and says she enjoys having three phalli shoved into her rectum, that she’s being at all truthful… well, they’re bigger saps than I thought.
And I’m pretty sure Muhammad Ali would have a thing or two to say about politicization of sports.
I saw a really strange thing earlier when I was on the bus, and I was surprised that nobody called the guy out on the very soft porn T shirt he was wearing, while pushing his infant daughter in a buggy. This T shirt had bare breasts, thighs and a bare butt with a finger pulling a thong out of its buttcrack. I don’t understand why a young guy would wear something like this, certainly if a woman wore a T shirt with penises on it that would be weird and inappropriate, but I’ve seen guys wearing pictures of ripped guys muscles as well which I tend to think is homoerotic.
@Kevin:
O_o
I mean, I know love is a Many-Splendoured Thing and all that, but how would that even work? Aren’t paved surfaces awfully… flat?
@Kiwiwriter,
Er, what you’ve got there is sort of the definition of “internet diagnosing”, with a heapin’ helpin’ of homophobia, body-shaming and poverty-shaming in there as well. Please read the comment policy!
@Z&T:
A friend of mine actually does have pet skunks. Yes, they are pretty bright; his figured out how to pull the refrigerator open, at least. And I petted another one once that had been pretty much raised by a wildlife rescue group. Quite calm, and a beautiful ‘apricot’ skunk, pretty much entirely white; most people wouldn’t have even recognized her as a skunk without the usual markings.
I’ve seen wild skunks around here in town a few times. Once had one walk right past me up the driveway while I was waiting for the taxi to take me to the airport. Just calmly walking past, knowing nobody was stupid enough to cause a fight.
First of all, thanks for the amazingly humourous comments! <3
After reading this…whatever it is, my initial reaction was: if a white woman likes butt sex, and her white boyfriend likes butt sex, and they've both had procedures to not have children, is that Whitegenoception? 😉
I remember seeing a horrifying clip from a right wing chat show where the host was talking to an orthodox Jewish rabbi about women having to pray for their period as it was a baby they didn’t have, they’d associated it with some kind of abortion thing for some reason, I might be wrong but I think it might have been Glenn Beck?
@ Everyone,
Yay, skunks! 🙂
I was concerned for the one I saw the other day because it’s so unbearably hot and humid here. Not even the animals can take it. People walking exhausted looking dogs, the squirrels look tired, even the bugs gave up, I’m seeing all these little brown moths all over, clinging to the sides of buildings.
@ Jenora Feuer,
🙂 Skunks opening fridges! 🙂 And apricot skunks? Oo I’m going to have to Google this! Apricot would be a good name for a skunk too 🙂
Did just Google pix. Awww!!!! Anyone needing brain bleach: try this.
Then I hit the “domesticated” tab on the Google images, – and there were some raccoons hiding in there! 😀
I’ve been lurking here for a while and I’m literally beginning to think all cisgendered heterosexual white men have this kind of delusional alternative reality that these specimen express to the fullest extent.
Like I’ve socialized with a lot of privileged white folks in my day, but I’m seriously beginning to think their collective delusion is beginning to see the light.
@CatMara
That was hysterical! It’s going to be running through my head the rest of the evening.
As for skunks, they’re surprisingly laid back. I get skunks in the yard too. They just keep grubbing in the grass completely unconcerned that I’m there. I get a little nervous if they get close, but they seem fine. I’ve never tried to pet them though.
I swear I think I could do my own version of Suburban Wild Kingdom. The robins come in droves as the sun sets. The raccoons come through between 9:30 and 10:30 and the skunks show up around midnight. Rabbits are generally afternoon visitors but the cats chase them. And I’ve seen the occasional coyote in the alley. Those guys I do try to make noise and chase them off though.
I love a quote about skunks from a David Attenborough special…
Properly speaking, neither skunks, opossums, nor raccoons are domesticated at this time (although I rather suspect the latter two are engaged in a process of self-domestication not unlike that of cats and ferrets at the dawn of agriculture). Tame is another thing entirely, and comes with a much higher probability of reverting to wild behaviours under stress.
Four quick thoughts
Rainbowfication sounds majestic
Not going to lie
If you don’t like anal porn don’t watch it porn comes with subject tags doesn’t it ? Problem solved for him.
This whole thing reeks of some dude saying no homo in a pseudo mantra because he hugged his male friend
And I don’t get the obsession with pure bred dogs to be blunt
I love mixes
My pup is a mix and she’s the best dog in the whole world. She’s very intelligent. I’m usually more of a cat person and Bailey is the first dog I’ve ever lived with. As much as I always loved dogs too, I admit to believing that cats were far smarter and that dog’s trainability was just mindless conditioning. Bailey has changed my mind and now I view cats and dogs as smart in different ways.
It sometimes seems like Bailey understands English. Not just commands. Like, conversational English. It’s weird. She can discern between “we’ll go for a walk later” and “want to go for a walk now?” She can understand from me talking in casual tones and complete sentences when I do and don’t intend to let her wade in the creek. Which changes from walk to walk. It’s very weird.