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Neckbeard Deathcamp is the best parody Nazi incel black metal band ever (if you don’t actually listen to them)

Der neckbeard

By David Futrelle

Today my favorite band in the world is Neckbeard Deathcamp, whose new album “White Nationalism is for Basement Dwelling Losers” brilliantly skewers white supremacists, Nazis, incels, and white supremacist Nazi incels.

It’s an amazing bit of musical trolling, if you set aside the fact that the music itself (which the band describes as “FEDORA CRUSHING MILITANT BLACK METAL “)  is unlistenable sludge, with growly unintelligible vocals that don’t seem to have any relation at all to the printed lyrics,

But, oh, the lyrics! Consider what I see as the standout track on the album, “Please Respond (I Showed You My Penis).”

HI FEW THINGS TO START OFF YES I ADDED YOU BECAUSE YOURE A FEMALE GAMER TIS AN AWESOME THING TO SEE IM BRIAN DONT BE INTIMIDATED IM NOT A STEREOTYPICAL GUY 
IF ANYTHING ILL BE THE ONE IN THE KITCHEN

PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND PLEASE RESPOND

I kind of like “XXXL Obersturmfuhrer Leather Duster” too.

STURM THE KOMMENTS THREAD

ONE THOUSAND CUCKS BORN TO DIE

GEWEHR FIRE LIGHTS THE SKY

ANGRY REACTS FALL LIKE BOMBS

CALL OF DUTY BASIC TRAINING

WORLD OF WARCRAFT CUT MY TEETH

BEDROOM REICH TENDY KRIEG

INFO WAR HAIL KEK VAPE NATION

GOD EMPEROR CARGO SHORTS

HAIL TRUMP WEHRWULF WARRIOR OV THE FUHRER

WINDED BY A FLIGHT OV STAIRS

BEDROOM REICH TENDY KRIEG

INFO WAR HAIL KEK VAPE NATION

GOD EMPEROR CARGO SHORTS

HAIL TRUMP VALHALLA AWAITS US VETERANS OF THE MEME WAR

So enjoy. It only costs a dollar to download. Or you can just stream it for free.

Check it out here on Bandcamp.

H/T — I discovered ND through a tweet from @edgedestroys.

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Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
2 years ago

unlistenable sludge

I genuinely like it. Reminded me of the first time I saw Napalm Death; so I got all nostalgic. And the first track has a real musique concrete vibe.

And the song titles are great.

Jo
Jo
2 years ago

David, do you rate the music as unlistenable sludge as a connoisseur of the genre or is that your judgement on all black metal? I don’t get it myself, but I respect that those who do can hear something I’m missing. I’m not bothered that some people don’t like it, but I’d be interested to hear what a black metal enthusiast thinks about this band.

Fluffy Spider Returns
Fluffy Spider Returns
2 years ago

Now this is glorious
Not usually a death or black metal fan (more of a nightwish and other symphonic kind of woman )
But this is glorious

Max
Max
2 years ago

It’s a real church burner.

Gijoel
Gijoel
2 years ago

@Max I see what you did there.

Honestly it sounds like a whale sing Karoke in a dirty public toilet with a broken tape deck. But anything that makes male supremacist cry is aright by me.

TreePerson
TreePerson
2 years ago

I don’t get black metal either but I’m glad it exists for those who appreciate the art form,
I’m more of a Hudson K/War Twins enby myself.

Off topic but I figured some folks here might wear pronoun pins and I just got a 50 pack of good quality locking pin backs for my growing collection of assorted pins i have on my backpack, they seem really secure and are pretty easy to get on and off I can recommend them if you are at all worried about your pins coming off with the stock backs.

Sophist
Sophist
2 years ago

I mean, they’re no Gorgoroth, but “Zyklon /b/” is a pretty great title.

Cindy
Cindy
2 years ago

Eh. I like the concept, but since “neckbeard” is kind of a dogwhistle for autism… I’ll pass.

hapnadsmannen
hapnadsmannen
2 years ago

I remember on white noise concerts in the 90-s sometimes lyrics sheets would be distributed because even the fans themselves couldn´t hear the words. Maybe the musical style too is a subtle satire?

Vic
Vic
2 years ago

Not normally a fan of the all-fast-blast style of black metal like Dark Funeral or newer Marduk, but it hits all the right notes in aesthetics and presentation and the lyrics are genius. I dig it.

Barloq
2 years ago

I saw this on Reddit about a week ago on the metal subreddit and everyone there was either praising the bands for making some legitimately good black metal, or were butthurt Nazis getting downvoted into oblivion.

Personally, I’m definitely into the music and it’s pretty good as far as black metal goes, but considering how funny the lyrics are I wish that they were more intelligible (I know, that’s a feature of the genre, but still).

calmdown
calmdown
2 years ago

Musically I can’t say I love it, but the lyrics are fantastic! My ex LOVES metal, and for years I tried to like it too, but the really intense black metal stuff like this is not for me. I did learn to like a lot of it though, mostly the old classic rock stuff like Iron Maiden.

It’s also frustrating that the metal genre seems to have a lot of white supremacists in it. I hated having to go online and do research on every band to make sure they weren’t Nazis. This is very frustrating to the anti-Nazi’s in the genre and many are rightfully pissed off about it. Like this band, people need to take a stand against the enemies in their midst instead of letting it fester and ruin the music.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
2 years ago

@ calmdown

Nazis try to spoil everything. Punk, Oi, Metal…

Even the skinheads were originally an anti racist thing. White kids listening to Jamaican rude boy music. There’s still anti Nazi skinheads; but I can understand if black people assume the worst when they see the uniform.

(I also have a particular bugbear about Nazi infiltration of paganism)

calmdown
calmdown
2 years ago

I also have a particular bugbear about Nazi infiltration of paganism

Me too! They’re just the worst, appropriating symbols and runes from ancient cultures! Even the Swastika was a stolen symbol.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
2 years ago

@ calmdown

Oh gawd(s and gawdesses); that’s especially infuriating!

I was trying to register a particular Norse symbol I like as a trademark. It came back that there was no problem competition-wise; but it was a prohibited symbol in some parts of Europe because it’s been hijacked by Neo-Nazis.

(I can especially rant about the appropriation of Viking culture by neo-Nazis. Not just because they’re fascists, but because they’re so wrong in their interpretation. The Vikings’ biggest trading partner was the Caliphate. They annoy me not just as an ‘SJW’, but as a pedant.)

BlackBloc
BlackBloc
2 years ago

I hated having to go online and do research on every band to make sure they weren’t Nazis.

At this point, I just do that on principle. I mean, even Ace of Base were nazis, so, you know…

Gaebolga
Gaebolga
2 years ago

Alan Robertshaw wrote:

Even the skinheads were originally an anti racist thing. White kids listening to Jamaican rude boy music. There’s still anti Nazi skinheads; but I can understand if black people assume the worst when they see the uniform.

I used to work with a guy who was childhood friends with a non-Nazi skinhead called USA Gary, who – in addition to starring in a number of awesomely unbelievable stories of unbelievably epic unbelievability – was supposedly feared by the neo-Nazi skinhead community in LA in the 80s because of the savage beatings he would administer to them.

My second favorite USA Gary story involves the time he was at a party and a neo-Nazi came up behind him and broke a bat over the back of his head, knocking him down a flight of stairs. The story has it that as soon as he hit the ground, Gary popped up like a jack in the box, charged up the stairs, grabbed the guy by the face, dragged him to a window, and defenestrated the hell out of him.

Katamount
Katamount
2 years ago

I’m actually not that big a fan of metal, so I probably won’t listen to it, but anything to tweak the snotty noses of these assfaces is always for the good.

I’ve actually been listening to my back-catalogue of Sam Roberts and there’s a lot of humanistic lyrics that shine through in his stuff. Some of it more subtle than others.

Hell, his first EP was called The Inhuman Condition.

Cindy
Cindy
2 years ago

@calmdown

Oh yes. They seem to have no creative ability of their own, they gotta steal all their symbols. Even Pepe the frog is stolen!

ellesar
ellesar
2 years ago

frustrating that the metal genre seems to have a lot of white supremacists in it

tell me about it

Even the skinheads were originally an anti racist thing

I know a man who is STILL a skin and he is into the early Jamaican music and is not racist.

Jenora Feuer
Jenora Feuer
2 years ago

@Alan:
Ska! Ska! Oi!

Interestingly, the first I really heard of that was from comic books: Evan Dorkin is a big fan, and would work Ska and Oi! references into Pirate Corp$ and its follow-on Hectic Planet.

Evan Dorkin is probably better known for ‘Milk and Cheese: Dairy Products Gone Bad!’, though he also did some of Space Ghost: Coast to Coast. Of course, if you’re coming from the Ska side, he also did a number of album covers.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
2 years ago

@ jenora

Ska! Ska! Oi!

Hah, now you’ve got me all nostalgic. I want to stick my white socks, Farrah slacks, and snorkel parka on.

I suppose the ultimate in anti fascist Oi! has to be this lot.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
2 years ago

@ Gaebolga

I’d very much like to have seen USA Gary in action.

@ ellesar

STILL a skin

In my youth there were still old Teddy Boys knocking around. We used to wonder if in 30 years time there’d be old punks and goths. We never realised, yes, it’d be us.

Talonknife
Talonknife
2 years ago

(more of a nightwish and other symphonic kind of woman )

Aw yeah, symphonic metal is my shit!

Perry
Perry
2 years ago

I can’t figure out which is my favorite title. It might be “HAIL TRUMP VALHALLA AWAITS US VETERANS OF THE MEME WAR”.

Bina
2 years ago

@Alan and Gaebolga:

I want to meet USA Gary, too. And shake his hand. And buy him a great big buttload of whatever he wants to drink. If even half of that is true, that is worthy of reverence.

Also, for what it’s worth, I’m an old New Waver. (Gawwwwd, that sounds weiiiiiirrrrrd.)

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
2 years ago

Does anyone have (a link to) a comprehensive list of music groups to avoid? I’m surprised to see an act as (formerly) mainstream as Ace of Base listed as evil…

Dvärghundspossen
Dvärghundspossen
2 years ago

@Cindy: wow, that was completely new to me. We’ve discussed before on this site that ”neckbeard” might be a problematic insult because it’s about men not being properly groomed, but it should be up to you whether you wanna groom yourself or not. But I had zero idea it had anything to do with autism.

Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
2 years ago

My cat went and hid under the bed. The lyrics are truly inspired, tho.

epitome of incomprehensibility

Hey, hey, I think it’s listenable sludge. But the lyrics are indeed indecipherable.

Oi Polloi is the best band name! Was aggressively head-nodding along. 🙂 When I was younger I liked a punk band that was Oi style, but (gasp) American… Lower Class Brats? Yes, that’s them.

@Cindy, Dvärghundspossen: I hadn’t heard that “neckbeard” was related specifically to autism, but it gets associated with other stereotypes. I don’t like to mix up fascism, entitlement, or misogyny with neutral things like playing video games, being fat, having messy hair, living with one’s parents, and all the other things that get thrown around as “loser” attributes. I mean, who is a loser? Nobody’s a loser or a winner at life in general. Life doesn’t work like that. (end rant)

Luzbelitx
2 years ago

As a former metalhead who wasn’t especially into black/death metal, I dig.

I still think the singing is a bit too unintelligible, even for the genre.

8/10 would listen to

In fact, I already moved on to listen to “The left are the real fascists”.

These guys ain’t bad at all, says younger me:

http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e224/arjentina86/301393_2385545474275_1716296154_n.jpg

ETA: Also, puns!
comment image

Diptych
Diptych
2 years ago

Oh, man. Back in the day (not actually so very long ago) I had a jacket covered with various classic punk and Oi! patches. The centrepiece was intended to be a homemade graffiti patch of Horses-era Patti Smith, but I could never quite get the paints and such to work.

Dvärghundspossen
Dvärghundspossen
2 years ago

@Epitome: Yeah that’s basically the discussion we had before about “neckbeard” on this site. It’s literally about men not being properly groomed, which shouldn’t be a requirement if you don’t feel like it, and it’s also, as you say, associated with other things that are ethically neutral and people shouldn’t be shamed for. So I agree it’s problematic, I just never heard there was a particular autism connection.