By David Futrelle
A quarter of a century ago, in his seminal The Myth of Male Power, Men’s Rights Activist Warren Farrell warned hapless, horny males of the danger of “miniskirt power” — that is, the hypnotizing power of shapely female asses, which devious women can apparently use to have their (financial) way with men who ostensibly have more power than them. Damn those conniving harpies and their short, short skirts!
Today, men — well, horny straight men anyway — face what some consider a far more insidious enemy: Yoga pants, the allegedly comfortable lower-half coverups popular with the devious, man-exploiting harpies of the current age.
Well, the brave souls of the Men Going Their Own Way movement are having none of it. Here is the MGTOW case against yoga pants, based on my perusal of several dozen recent postings on the subject in the MGTOW subreddit.
Make sure not to laugh at any of these, as the threat of yoga pants is very, very serious and not just some ridiculous crap these guys have come up with to make themselves feel like they’re being oppressed by women who won’t date them they REFUSE to date.
Yoga pants are so tight it’s like these sluts are walking around naked and basically it’s sexual harassment because biology makes men perpetually horny.
“Wearing yoga pants to work is sexual harassment,” Baldrbaldr complains.
And the bullshit about “men just needing to control themselves?” Well, it’s bullshit. Men can’t but become seriously distracted when half-naked women prance around them. It’s the way we’re made. It’s biology. So fuck off, you bare assed bitches. We’re working.
“Females are an expensive, unknown distraction,” adds fcb98292, sounding a little bit like Jordan Peterson. “I require segregated offices.”
Actually they make women look better than they look naked, which is somehow worse than looking like they’re naked because it’s a LIE or something.
“You don’t know what they look like naked,” greenleefs informs his fellow MGTOWs. “Those pants lift and squish together.”
Yoga pants enable women to use their ass power to extract wealth from hardworking betas and sex from Chads.
As one [deleted] commenter sees it:
The yoga pants is to show off their ass so that Chad and beta bucks (depending on which they are stalking) will drool on himself while he throws sex and cash at her.
Yoga pants are basically HiDef streaming porn videos.
Raisins3142 explains:
I think in part they are trying to compete with high speed internet + free internet porn.
Sometimes fat ladies wear them and, ew, gross.
As ilikerelish puts it:
There should be limits to where they are worn, and there should be a WEIGHT LIMIT for wearing yoga or legging pants.
Bing_Bang_Bam is similarly outraged that “[e]ven fat cows that have rolls and folds that shouldn’t even be there” wear yoga pants — a true “[c]rime against nature.”
Sometimes skinny old ladies wear them and you’re tricked into thinking that they look hot and this is very confusing
Hegend1999 laments those times “[w]hen you see a good ass in leggings and she turns around then you see that she’s like 70yo…”
Iqbal40862715 is similarly confused that he finds himself attracted to very much older women.
Yoga pants are a net nagative. They make everyone look good and it’s a total mind fuck.
Saw this 80 year old broad in a bathing suit the other day at a pool. She was probably an Elvis groupie in the 50s/legit perfect 10. Now she is cute and in good shape but wrinkly and old.
Goes into a bathroom to change Puts on yoga pants meets up with the grandkids and sure enough looks awesome.
Apparently women in yoga pants can jump right over that mythical wall they’re all supposed to hit at the age of 30 or so.
They’re not actually comfortable
“They aren’t comfortable,” asserts LJHova, “that’s just the excuse they use to convince themselves they aren’t whores.”
.They smell like ass (probably).
“I call them stink butts,” SirLonius explains.
You know women wear them multiple times before washing them and just a thin layer between butthole and the outside world.
They enable women to easily engage in casual workplace frottage with hunky dudes
According to Jcart105,
It’s comfy when Chad grinds his cock separated by the [layer] of his pants and thin layer of her yoga pants in the middle of work.
Er, what?
Seeing women in yoga pants is sort of like seeing attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion, or something.
Global_MGTOW sheds some tears in the rain:
I’ve seen it all already. I’ve seen women wearing a see through shirt in a very public place with thousands of people, including children, showing off her rocket tits implants. I’ve seen girls wearing mini skirts so small that you can constantly see their panties with zero effort. Seen obese landwhales wearing yoga pants with the words “JUICY” written across the back.
All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.
Ok, I added that bit from Blade Runner at the end. Because, you know, these guys aren’t melodramatic enough already — and trying way too hard to convince themselves and each other of the existential horror of, basically, tight sweatpants.
Seriously, dudes? Seriously?
Hey yoga-pants-hating dudes! Ever warn something with waist band with a spinal injury in your lower back? The only pants I really can even wear are yoga pants and leggings. Other pants are so beyond painful I don’t even bother
So yoga pants are like a cheat code that allows women to climb the wall? Huh, convenient, considering it’s my “hit the wall day”(though I can’t really see any difference in me yesterday to me today)
Actually prefer leggings, do they count as well?
My personal style can pretty much be summed up as “a loosely-fitted dress and tights feel pretty much the same as wearing a t-shirt and leggings, except I can get away with wearing them at the office.” Don’t tell the MGTOWs or they’ll howl about it.
Sally forth me if I’m wrong, but aren’t these the same group of jackasses that are always decrying Ess Jay Dubyas of being a bunch of anti-sex harridans trying to police male “sexuality” (read: harassing behaviour)? And now they’re turning around trying to police women’s clothing as being too revealing?!
Gee, almost like there’s a double-standard at work.
OT, but Viola Desmond is on today’s Google doodle in Canada and it tells her story in a cute little cartoon way.
@kupo
I mean, how was her behavior appropriate? He opened with a compliment by saying he valued what she had to say in her public AMA response, then disagreed with small portions with ‘I believe’ statements.
I couldn’t have crafted a more gentle invitation to a discussion if you paid me to. The dude was clearly interested in her professional thoughts and she reacted like a petulant child. I mean, she didn’t have a problem with another man who was drooling over how super great her writing is.
It’s just, how is it okay to attempt to incite a dog-pile on a customer for giving the absolute most benign feedback with a product that you proudly associate your account with? Nevermind that she publically celebrated someone’s death on that same account.
@Gaebolga – That’s hilariously disturbing. I worked with plenty of cowboy brogrammers during the dot com era who demanded special $1500 ergonomic chairs and bottomless Red Bull, and weren’t exactly polished when it came to social skills. Nowadays, with the global workforce, there’s a lot more competition for programming slots and a lot more pressure on companies to implement mature business practices. My workplace, at least, has gotten far less indulgent towards employees who aren’t team players.
For office jobs, it seems like a waste of time trying to enforce strict business dress in departments where workers are remote or not customer-facing. There’s a DBA in my office who I literally haven’t seen in 3 years. His cubicle is still there, and once in awhile he pops up on IM, but I couldn’t tell you what kind of pants he wears. Three quarters of my co-workers live in Poland or Ukraine. When I do go into the office, it’s usually very quiet.
Yoga pants are such a non-issue in our office. The most pressing problems we have are loud phone talkers, and people stealing the communal cream cheese from the refrigerator.
Were leggings the tactical pants that Scott Pruitt used EPA funds for?
Someone correct me if I’m wrong, but the impression that I get is that she got fired because she didn’t want to interact with someone on her personal – not business – account. She’s also a dev, not in customer service, right? Why is she required to take feedback? Especially if apparently his opinion was uniformed?
Also, you’re ignoring that men in the industry can treat people like absolute shit, they can sexually harass female colleagues and still keep their jobs.
Isn’t it funny how the freeze peach mob will defend privileged people inciting hate against the marginalized, but has objection to a woman getting fired for telling a man she doesn’t want to spend her time off interacting with a tedious fan online?
Meanwhile, POTUS makes a rape joke when talking about Senator Elizabeth Warren
https://twitter.com/Alyssa_Milano/status/1015061556227264512
But yes, lets get outraged at a woman not being nice enough to a mansplainer.
I guess you guys didn’t see the news, Juicy Couture is back:
http://www.vogue.co.uk/article/juicy-couture-is-back
As for workplaces with yoga-pants friendly dress codes: I work in biology research and a lot of women opt for leggings/yoga pants. As long as your legs are covered, nobody really cares what you’re wearing. I think the same is true at most other academic research and biotech labs, and other casual, non-client-facing workplaces.
I mean, I was specifically warned that I was accountable for all of my online behavior using any online handles that I associate with the sporting news network that I worked for as a developer for. If I said I worked for this company on my personal Twitter account than I was on the hook for what I said. That’s why I dont talk about where I work. I 100% would have been sacked for reacting that way to a customer giving feedback about a product. I’d be on her side all day and night if she got doxxed. Feels like a serious double standard.
@weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee
What exactly is he saying, my phone doesn’t give any audio on the video? :/
What an infantile orange pustule. He really puts the POS in POTUS.
(I am curious, though: what is gently throwing a DNA kit at somebody supposed to do? Is it like when he threw paper towels at PR hurricane victims?)
Speaking of Elizabeth Warren, I was at a parade in deep red New Hampshire on Wednesday. One of the floats was a pickup truck advertising Shiva Ayyadurai for US Senate. He’s a far-right techbro who claims to have invented email as a teenager and is running for Warren’s seat in Mass. (not sure why he was campaigning in NH, but okayyyy). The sign on top of the truck featured Warren in a photoshopped Native American headdress and the tagline “Only a real Indian can defeat a fake Indian”. In case that wasn’t racist enough, the truck speakers were blaring the stereotypical Hollywood Indian drumbeat (DUNH dun-dun-dun DUNH dun-dun-dun).
I couldn’t help myself, I yelled “RACIST!” at the top of my lungs as the truck passed by. A whole bunch of people turned around to look at me and I was like, oh shit, I forgot I’m in New Hampshire, this isn’t going to go well. To my immense surprise, they all started nodding their heads and agreeing with me that it was OTT racist and inappropriate for a 4th of July parade, or really anywhere at all. Maybe there is some tiny hope for portions of humanity.
I’m really baffled by his campaign schtick. He’s campaigning on racism, yet he’s Indian. What’s more, he’s an immigrant. Any Trumpists who answer his dogwhistle are likelier to want to deport him, not vote for him.
And if you scratch the surface – oh, looky! He was charged with assault and battery after an argument with his girlfriend in 2005. Tried to stab the arresting officer with a pen.
At this point I’m only shocked when a Republican candidate *doesn’t* have a past history of violence, harrassment, or sexual abuse.
I still can’t comprehend why it wasn’t all over when he mocked someone with a disability; but we’ll give him some stick for you when he comes here for his
Stateofficialvisit.@ valyrine
Probably just as well; you’d only end up throwing it.
(In essence, a charming cocktail of misogyny and racism with a soupçon of rape implication)
@J: “Don’t tell me how to do my job” is not a sentiment that should get somebody fired, regardless of how professional or unprofessional it may have been for her to publicly post it to Twitter. Moreover, a (male) colleague of hers was fired as well, for defending her. All over an incredibly milquetoast comment that was simply highlighting things that typically happen to women working in the gaming industry.
nevermind, just watched it on computer… Disgusting
So, female game devs should be required to not have any kind of presence online because if they step out of line in any way a mob of angry gamebros will go after her and get her fired.
In other words she was “asking for it.” Just like Zoe Quinn and Brianna Wu and Leigh Alexander and Anita Sarkeesian and everyone else who’s drawn the wrath of misogynistic gamebros, yeah?
Apparently today is National Write Nude day, so who needs yoga pants, eh?
One of those dudes is seriously disturbed to find he’s sexually attracted to someone old enough to be his grandmother, and has to retroactively justify it by claiming she must have had sex with Elvis… very odd.
I suppose, given the way these charmers talk about women – any woman at all – there’s a terror that they might be attracted to a woman their mates would immediately run down. A sort of weaponised “I don’t fancy yours” competition.
Suggesting that they are not actually interested in women so much as in trying to impress each other.
I’m officially death fat.
There are two reasons I don’t wear yoga pants:
1. They don’t have pockets.
2. Tight fitting clothes don’t agree with my eczema.
Because I carry around a lot of stuff and hate hand bags I live in cargo pants and cargo shorts.
Things like my meds, wallets, phone, fidgets, e-reader get distributed over the pockets.
And when I go to work my lunch, thermos and yarn craft go into my backpack.
Dear MGTOWS:
The world doesn’t revolve around your boners!
The excuse that men “Can’t help” being sexual harassment machines is always an eyeroll for me.
You can totally help it. These guys just don’t want to. I’m the only guy at my job; Everyone else is a woman– and they’re around my age, too. Wouldn’t you know it? I’ve never sexually harrassed any of them–you know, because that’s a garbage thing to do!
@j
In addition to what WWTH said:
https://twitter.com/nniskanen/status/1015205323798450176?s=19
He was not being polite. He, a layperson, was explaining to her, a dev with 10 years of experience, an extremely common pattern in her line of work.
I’ve worked at an employer who had a very strict social media policy. It did not include never being rude to people who consume their product. Ffs. Unless you’re the official social media account of a company, you don’t need to be polite to people on social media.
And you call her a petulant child? For this?
Because she had the nerve to not be 100% pleasant? What precisely is childish about telling off the millionth dude to tell you how to do your job (not initiate a conversation, by the way–that would involve asking questions, not telling someone what they should be doing)? If the dude was not prepared for an adult conversation with some shartp edges he should not have attempted to correct someone on something he doesn’t fucking know.
Thats… not even close to what I said though. I’m saying that if you associate yourself with a company using a specific handle than you can be held accountable for what you say using that handle. I dont like it but I understand that companies dont wanna catch heat for what their employees have to say.
I mean what really happened? She was in an AMA, a very very public firm of discussion. A man (ew) said that he appreciated her perspectives and opinions and he offered his own. She decided that since he was a man that what he said was of zero value. A lot of men, women, and LGBT folk called her out for being a total bigot. I mean she even said in her comment chain that she was unsure about something and wanted peoples thoughts!
But I mean if I’m totes missing the point then that’s one thing, but to describe what he said as misogynistic mansplaining is just lost on me. Like I said, I’d never make a comment like hers on a handle that I openly associated with the company I worked for because I know what the consequences for doing so would be. I’m not happy that she lost her job. I really hate this culture of people wanting to ruin people lives over their opinions online but I just can’t believe anyone would feel sorry if I implied that a womans feedback on my creative work was unwelcome because she was a woman and ended up losing my job over it.
And sharing one’s opinion about what they like in the games they play in a discussion about games isnt telling people how to do their job is it? I mean how many times has people here had an opinions about other peoples work? I just dont get it.
@j,
http://i.giphy.com/media/mcVm7WowGw7lK/source.gif
I will do you a little kindness here, my duck. My first reaction was more vociferous, but I cool quickly.
The twitter threads surrounding her firing are pretty good at explaining what she was angry about and why her getting angry about it shouldn’t have gotten her fired. Kupo above does a good job too.
Women get this shit all the time. It’s impossible to be a professional woman without having every single decision or motivation questioned by a chorus of men. Specifically, men who think their passing interest in the thing gives them a gift of competence over her.
If it were once in awhile? Fine. Happens to everyone once in awhile. But we aren’t talking about once in awhile, it’s constant. “Advice” in the form of declarative “this is how to do it properly” statements. Being outright ignored until a man says the exact same thing. Having your work picked over for any flaw or sign of imperfection, and then having to bear the brunt of unreasonable criticism for it. There are hundreds of studies that bear this out in all number of situations, if you can’t see it directly. (And it’s okay if you can’t! We’re all blind in certain directions in our lives. Realizing that is crucial.)
We all know that no one person can move mountains and change how society works to make this go away. The first step to fixing it is accepting that it’s there – and that involves allowing the victims of this behaviour to vent their anger about it.
That’s why her anger was valid, and why the company deserves to be dragged over the coals for firing her. I hope she finds new work quickly, with a company that values quality over obedience.
I hope that makes sense.
It’s also important for men to realize that many of you believe you are entitled to unlimited amounts of women’s time and energy. Emotional courtesan was a great way to put it. When you see a woman snapping at a man who is being splainy but doing it in a superficial way, it is often a straw that broke the camel’s back kind of thing. Those kinds of “helpful” comments do not seem so benign when you’re constantly subjected to them.