By David Futrelle
Back in March, Washingtonian magazine reported that young Trumpers in DC were having a bit of trouble finding dates, what with virtually everyone in the heavily Dem city hating their guts. (I wrote about it here.) Three months and several big steps closer to fascism later, and, guess what, decent people still don’t want to be in the same room with Trump enablers, much less in their pants.
A story on Politico today by Danel Lippman and Ben Schreckinger examines the widespread social shunning of the “young Trumpies” who descended on DC like a plague of Nazi dweebs after Trump’s electoral college victory in 2016. Talking to “more than 30 millennial staffers from the Trump White House and across the administration, both current and former,” the two authors report, these poor creatures “told us their horror stories about being heckled on the street and their struggles to get a date.”
Owning the libs by being treated like the crap you are!
They are so hated, apparently. that “they largely keep to themselves, more likely to hop between intimate apartment gatherings than to hit the town,” and live clustered together, mostly in a single neighborhood, where they drown their sorrows in the hot tubs on the roofs of their luxury apartments, consoled somewhat by the fact that they and their Young Trumpy pals are still running the government (into the ground).
Nowhere do they suffer more than in what a lot of them, I’m guessing, call the sexual marketplace.
When it comes to disclosing their affiliation with Trump, no ground is more fraught than courtship. “Trump supporters swipe left”—meaning “don’t even bother trying”—might be the single most common disclaimer on dating app profiles in Washington.
I think I might bust out crying.
Some Young Trumpies have come up with a genius strategy to counteract the perfectly justified hate, which is to hide the fact that they are Young Trumpies from dates and potential dates.
Young staffers have had to develop a keen sense of just when to have “The Talk” with romantic partners. “I’ve still been able to hook up with women,” says a male former White House staffer. “But I know that I need to be careful about broaching the Trump stuff. I just know that going in, I need to be able to get it out at the right time and not get it out too early to the point where it’s like, ‘Hey, I worked for Trump, you should stop talking to me,’ but late enough in that eventually they know that there is this information floating out there that I worked for this guy and hopefully you have now seen that I’m not a horrible person and we can go further with this.”
Huh. Somehow I suspect he’s having this “Talk” after he’s hooked up with unsuspecting women, not before.
Even the lady Trumpies are suffering.
One beleaguered 31-year-old female administration official described at length her “very, very frequent” scraps with her matches on dating apps. “You do the small talk thing, and you have a very good conversation, and then they might say, ‘You didn’t vote for Trump, right?’” she says. “As soon as I say, ‘Of course I did,’ it just devolves into all-caps ‘HOW COULD YOU BE SUCH A RACIST AND A BIGOT?’ And ‘You’re going to take away your own birth control.’”
Is there such a thing as justifiable mansplaining? Because I’m thinking this might qualify.
In one recent star-crossed exchange, the official told a match she worked for the federal government. When he pushed, she revealed she was in the administration. He asked her, “Do you rip babies from their mothers and then send them to Mexico?”
Gosh, it’s so unfair to be criticized for enabling the grotesque human rights violations the Trump administration commits every day.
Evasive answers will get you only so far, though, since many dating apps provide enough information for inquisitive users to sleuth out their matches’ identities. “I literally got the other day, ‘Thanks but no thanks. Just Googled you and it said you were a mouthpiece for the Trump administration. Go fuck yourself,’” says the official. It’s all enough to drive her and some of her colleagues away from at least some of the apps. “I’m no longer on Bumble,” she says.
Good. One Twitterer suggested a dating app that might be a bit more appropriate for Young Trumpies looking for love:
Have a good weekend, unless you’re a Young Trumpy. Or an old Trumpy. Or any other Trumpy. Or a Trump.
Dr. Thang:
“I can’t reach those grapes, so they must be sour,” said Aesop’s fox.
Even if these guys were the handsomest on Earth — and they sure as hell are not — they’d have no face worth saving. You can’t simultaneously claim to be a good guy and willingly work and vote and offer up prayers in your church for a bad one. Actions have consequences. Politics have consequences. And if one of those consequences is that you lose your appeal to anyone with clear morals and a working conscience (i.e., an actual good person) — well, that’s just too bad! Maybe, if these guys wasted less time ranting about Planned Parenthood selling aborted baby parts (which they don’t do), and more time actually researching what’s behind those wild viral stories they pass around like the plague in their far-right echo chambers, they’d be salvageable. But as it currently stands, they can all go to hell. No one wants to be known as the wife or girlfriend of “that shithead over there”.
And no one wants to be the mother of a shithead’s kids, either.
@Buttercup Q. Skullpants:
When I was in my twenties, I’d have given my right ovary to earn $25K a year.
@Dormousing_it – Same here. The rent on my first apartment was $120 a month and I could barely afford that.
$3000 a month is more in line with a $250K annual income. Makes me wonder if these are trust fund kids. If so, I bet they’re extra salty that their wealth doesn’t automatically parlay into SMV.
@Bakunin
Too many poor people on the road, obvs. Back in the good old days, the plebs walked, and the elites road on horseback, but the distinction has been lost in these unenlightened times. This is a nice easy fix, so to speak.
@Dormousing_it
Turns out all you needed to do was to get rid of your morals, compassion, notions of equality, justice and sense of decency. Waaaay more valuable than ovaries, apparently.
Good
These folks don’t need to breed
Womp womp. *hands Corey Lewandowski’s sad trombone back*
O/T – Husbeast and I are attending the local rally for the asylum seekers and their stolen children on the 30th and I want to start making some signs. I got an idea for one that says “Stop looking under pizza restaurants! The real child-snatchers are in the White House.” But I’m wondering if is this too esoteric or too provocative? I’d appreciate any feedback.
I’ll be making probably half a dozen signs at least, since there didn’t seem to be enough* when I went to the school shooting rally a few months ago. The rest will mostly say stuff like “Return the stolen children!” and “Seeking asylum is not a crime!”
*I was completely unprepared because it was my first rally and I decided to attend on the spur of the moment. Someone more prepared than I loaned me a sign with the name of one of the Florida school shooting victims.
HA!
Die miserable and alone, you pathetic, basement-dwelling little LOSERS.
@weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee & bluecat
I’d bring up Damien Thorn, too….but they worship that kid as their messiah.
Reagan O’Neil would not qualify since she was actually a nice, innocent, normal kid possessed by Pazuzu (folks tend to put her in the same ‘scary monster child antagonist’ boat as Damien, Issac & Malachi, etc. but she was really a victim).
Esther wouldn’t qualify either since she was really a 30-something woman with a hormonal condition pretending to be a child.
But I agree about “Bad Seed” kid and “Good Life” kid.
What about Samara?
Trump Staffers having trouble hooking up because of their unsavory beliefs? Why don’t they just call Roosh V?
I mean, isn’t this right up his disgusting alley?
Without feeling sympathetic toward these fascists, I keep thinking that surely there are relatively easy fixes for this – using your workplace and friends to start some kind of facebook group or other online space for conservatives to meet other conservatives in DC – that don’t involve whining about it.
Wasn’t there a post a little while back about an alt-right dating service?
@WWTH: Yes, there was. And the poster couple on their ads turned out to be a bit of an embarrassment. Of course.
The following might be ageist of me, but I’m always surprised when young and educated people are ultra right wing. I just don’t understand it, unless it’s a purely mercenary, pragmatic choice of theirs.
Even then, I find it tough to understand. What happened to the idealism of youth? Maybe they’re simply more worldly than I was when I was their age.
Or maybe, I’m being way too kind, and some people are simply selfish and heartless. That’s probably it.
OT: I’ll be taking care of an acquaintance’s two pet tomcats for the next week. One’s named Marco, and the other Polo.? There’s nothing like a big, juicy tomcat…
I think you’ll find that they have a very different upbringing from “standard-issue” millenials.
These are the ones whose wealthy parents sent them to a fancy private school where there’s uniforms and regimentation like it was a military academy, and who then went into a conservative postsecondary institution like a business school, certain law schools, or certain economics schools.
They’ve been raised with the notion that the US is a meritocracy where hard work and effort are all it takes to succeed, and (aside from the circumstances of their birth!) have never been confronted with evidence that disproves that. The home and school environments they were in were a bubble of Fox propaganda where facts and reality were not allowed to intrude, let alone any of “those people”.
One reform needed desperately after this — assuming there is an “after”, for the republic or indeed for the world — is to mandate public schooling, and to mandate broadening requirements even in law and business schools. Want to practice law? Have to at least take some science and some humanities courses. Same if you want an MBA. No more conservative bubbles before or after high school graduation; rich kids will rub elbows with poor ones, including kids of color, and won’t be sex-segregated, from a very early age. Everyone, rich or poor, gets the same curriculum as well. And of course this means the rich kids go to the same public schools their parents vote on funding (cuts) for, instead of the people who make such decisions not having any skin in the game, as it were. I think you’ll find that if their own kids go there most of them’ll suddenly start to care a lot more about the quality, and safety, of our public schools!
I know I’ve been banging on a lot about the 1951 Convention lately, but it’s the only way I can respond to the news these days without breaching the comment policy.
I’m concerned that now that immigrant detention has been shifted to the military, Trump will declare immigrants enemy combatants to get around due process and do whatever he wants to them. Once detention or deportation gets too expensive or difficult or once he decides those things just aren’t cruel enough to satisfy him anymore, that’s when the exterminations will start. Secretly at first. Maybe openly later on when he feels no one can/will stop him anyway.
I know I keep going on about this, and I know a lot of people think it’s hyperbolic to start thinking a holocaust is impending. But I don’t care. All the red flags are there. All of them. I’d rather we all overreact than underreact and it wind up being too late to prevent. Although it’s possible it’s already too late.
At the very best, it’s no longer inconceivable; and that’s good enough reason to run up the black flag.
Much as I despise the term thot, I may have to appropriate tsot….
Or “that Trumpkin over there.” Ttot. Tater tot? I’m not sure I want to sully the good name of tater tots, but it is the kind of nickname that might bruise their fragile but massive egos.
@WWTH:
You have my wholehearted agreement. If the CAPE is sky high and doppler shows rotation and TVS in a fast-developing cumulonimbus, you issue a tornado warning. If one doesn’t drop, you breathe a sigh of relief. If one does, and under those conditions the odds are better than 50/50, you’ve just saved lives.
Same thing.
Her, too.
Would Stewie Griffin of the 1st Season of Family Guy count? Here’s a baby with big plans of world domination who wants to kill his mom.
I never watched that show and find it ridiculous and gross but I heard that the early episodes were decent.
Notice how when some shows get uncancelled, they tend to derail all the characters and make them more absurd and jerkish?
@Gaebolga:
Yes! Make tsot happen.
@Surplus to Requirements:
I realize they’re not the typical millenials. At the very least, they have connections. I’m still perplexed.
If this article illustrates anything, it’s that the Trump supporters have no idea how long that stain is going to carry on with them. This is not 2004 where blogging was a new thing and the Bush-Cheney bumper stickers could be scraped off. It’s not even 2009, where iPhones were a relatively new thing and we weren’t Tweeting every ten seconds. It’s 2018, where the internet remembers everything and everything is online. Your umpteen #MAGA posts are going to be stapled to you for the rest of your life, Trumpkins. You might have thought the validation he lent was enough to overcome the resistance that followed, but there’s less of you than you think and history will not remember you kindly. And it will definitely remember you.