By David Futrelle
Pity the poor white supremacists on this, the Royal Wedding day. Unless you spent the day trapped in a well, and that well didn’t have a television or internet access or cell phone reception, you know that today is the day that Britain’s Prince Harry and Meghan Markle tied the royal knot. You probably also know that the newly minted Duchess of Sussex is mixed-race, with a white father and black mother.
This last bit is all that white supremacist alt-rightists and their internet friends can think about. No obsessing about Markle’s dress, no gawking at the ridiculous hats, no jokes about the renowned human rights lawyer Amal Clooney showing up to the wedding with “her husband” in tow. Nope: The only thing about the royal wedding that the Nazis want to talk about is how the pasty-white Duke and the new Dutchess are white genociding Europe so hard.
Neo-Nazi rag The Daily Stormer mourned the wedding in a post with the lovely headline “Surreal Derangement: Harry and His N***erbitch Finally Married.” In the post, Daily Stormer writer “Adrian Sol” described the bride both at a “monkey” and a “jungle n***erbitch” and repeatedly expressed his wish that she be murdered (“Princess Di’d”).
“I hope the Britcucks are prepared for the day they’ll be ruled over by a mulatto overlord,” he groused, hoping that after this big day
[w]e might get some respite from hearing about this disgusting couple for a few months, until Markle is ready to give birth to their deformed spawn.
Alas, he lamented, “[t]here’s now a precedent for n***ers ruling over European countries as royalty.” The one silver lining?
This is the end of British royal bloodline. I hate those freaking people. … Ending this crusty old bitch’s [Queen Elizabeth’s] bloodline by race-mixing with a monkey is cosmic justice, at least.
The white supremacist blog Occidental Dissent had an equally over-the-top reaction to the wedding, asking in its headline “Are Y’all Ready For Some Hardcore British Bestiality?” In the post, “Marcus Cicero” said he was a bit jealous of those in “the capital of Cuck Island” — that is, London — because
you don’t exactly get to see ancient White bloodlines get defiled in pomp and ceremony all that often.
As Cicero sees it, he’s not the only one pig-biting mad about the whole mixed-race thing.
[T]here are millions who aren’t too happy about this wedding …
Cuck Island may have been subject to propaganda more vicious than across the Pond, and a large bulk of the population may be currently deracinated to some degree, but you can’t just override genetic instinct all that easily (remember that, Jews).
And looking at this, you can easily tell that a huge number of people just sense that something is just not right – our imagination of royalty is typically Northern European in appearance, and you can’t honestly even push the Southron European look with this Cheddar Man resurrection.
In case you’re neither an archeology buff nor an alt-righter, “Cheddar Man” is the name given to the oldest skeleton ever found in the UK, the remains of a man who, scientists say, had dark skin — a fact that had the alt-rightosphere up in arms when the news came out this February. The “Cheddar Man resurrection” is of course a reference to Markle and her supposedly dark skin (that in reality is not that dark).
“Cicero” goes on to suggest that the release of a Meghan Markle sex tape is all but inevitable, as he assumes she “was quite busy with Jewish film/show producers during her failed acting career.” He ends the post by implying that the wedding isn’t something to be celebrated but instead the sort of thing that “should [be] punished medieval Tower of London-style” with some nice beheadings.
He illustrates the post with a number of exceedingly racist memes; I’ve put one of them up here.
Meanwhile, over on Gab — the “free speech” Twitter alternative that’s become a haven for Nazis and trolls — alt-rightists and other racists basically competed to see who could post the most cartoonishly racist take on the whole affair.
Oh look! This guy manages to work in some incel-style “roastie bashing” alongside his racism. It’s almost as if there is some sort of overlap between incels and the alt-right.
This guy attributes the wedding to some intricate and incomprehensible — to me, anyway — plan to control the black population.
This guy, meanwhile, has developed an even weirder conspiracy theory based around the notion that Markle is not actually mixed-race but actually just plain white.
And this last lovely comment will enable quite a few of you to fill in all the remaining squares on your Bigot Bingo card.
The royal wedding: come for the fairy-tale romance; stay for the white genocide.
Seconding Kupo’s suggestion, @WWTH. I don’t know what’s goin on with your little tablet without looking at it obviously, but I do know that the windows ecosystem is all about pushed stealth updates. I used to have a small series of low-end tablets that were only useable for, like, a year or so before they got too slow to use because of that problem specifically. Ended up buying a mid-tier Asus that’s lasted me a lot longer and hasn’t showed any signs of slowing down.
if you want to, you can probably go into the settings and turn off automatic updates entirely. I wouldn’t recommend it from a security standpoint, but ever since the fall update Windows has been hot steaming garbage in my opinion anyways.
I hope you can get a bit more use out of your machine!
Oh, and I can think of one advantage, if the royals decide to start marrying folks of African descent:
It sounds more and more like I’m going to have to get something new. Three years is probably a pretty good run for a cheap little tablet anyway. Unfortunately, I’ll have to get another cheap one and replace it with a better one when I have more $.
I like Asus! They make excellent hardware in my opinion. I’ve been buying from them for years and have only been disappointed once. Also not that expensive. Their Zenpads are good. I am on a T200 tablet right now, and the thing has lasted me years, still as snappy as when I bought it (I’ve put in some ram though). If you can afford it, the T200 turned into the Transformerbook series, which they still make. The screen cover is a hard keyboard so it’s an itty bitty laptop!
Oh, and I just realized I said I had a tablet when I meant a notebook. Oops. That does mean the laptop advice is probably useful though.
Anyway, since the hard drive never did have much space. I got this during the free upgrade to Windows 10 period and there wasn’t even enough space to do the update. There are no huge files taking up a lot of space, so it’s probably that Windows update gradually eating up space thing.
That sounds like a… problematic assessment phrased in a problematic way.
Disclaimer: I’m aware that what is and isn’t ok when we talk about race varies a lot according to context. Also, I’m both very white and live in a very white place, so my understanding is limited.
@Kupo:
I’m feeling a bit constipated with assfax right now. Plenty of assfax to go around.?
But Kupo, and Jo too, I meant the Negro, or Black, race, as separate from the White race. African, or African-American, doesn’t work in this context. (I also don’t think ‘Black’ is precise enough.) Africans can be White, or Caucasian. And, African-Americans generally have an admixture of both Black and White blood.
I meant no offense to anyone, really.
My own former bloodline came to an end sometime in the 1890s, when one of my great-great-grandparents’ sons married a Mexican lady. We haven’t missed it, and in its absence have carried on miscengenating.
@Victorious Parasol: I thought of the Queen from Dr. Who as well. I’m trying to think of a way that Meghan and Harry’s child can become King or Queen without, you know, something awful happening to William’s children, who are innnocent bystanders in my stupid fantasy.
Hot, maybe unpopular take: I didn’t like the dress for the ceremony. Anything looks OK I guess, if you drape fifty thousand dollars worth of embroidered lace over it, but I thought it was badly fitted, too plain, and kind of looked like doll clothes. Maybe Elizabeth loved it, and Meghan deferred, or something?
The dress she wore for the reception, and to leave, was both hot and classy, and I liked it.
@Dormousing_it
You don’t need to shit all over the place just because you’re full of it. Seriously, why are you deciding for someone what their ancestry is? Her mother is African-American. You don’t get to assert that she’s mixed race just because of how she looks or how her daughter is white-passing. That’s really disgusting. Fucking believe people of color.
@Moggie
Larval brits. I had to clean my phone screen after reading that….
Out of interest – who births them by now, if the queen doesn’t?
@Victorious parasol
I basically peed myself like an overexcited dog when I first saw that scene. So cool! Ah, doctor who used to be so good!
Fucking hell these stupid racists are really stupid and racist. I mean it’s expected but they really pushed the boat out on this one. They’ve made me appreciate the royal family ffs.
@Kupo:
I was speculating, that’s all. People speculate all the time.
You’re right, I don’t know what her ancestry is.
I suppose I shouldn’t have said anything at all.
@ podkayne
You’re not the only one who thinks that about the dress; lots of commentary on it. But apparently Meghan chose it herself. It’s by Givenchy’s first woman design director; who’s also British, so that’ll confuse the Daily Mail.
There was a lot of similar talk about Diana’s dress back in the day. I remember my mum’s first comment on seeing it was “You think they’d be able to afford an iron.”
Zaunfink – they have axolotl tanks for that now.
Fun fact: if and when Catherine Middleton becomes queen consort, she will be the first English queen consort since Catherine Parr.
@ Podkayne Lives
I’m not sure, according to this WhiteSupremacistGenetics (should probably be trademarked) whether I ceased to be of “white bloodline” when my niece was born (her ancestry is Indonesian/Pakistani on her mother’s side), when I married a man who has distant cousins who are Afro-Caribbean and who though not Jewish would have been quite Jewish enough for the Nazis to kill, or when my step-grandchildren, whose mother is Kenyan, made an appearance in the world.
Because clearly it works backwards and sideways, and quite likely can also be transmitted by sitting next to people on the bus.
But Queen Charlotte (the present Queen’s 5-times great grandmother I think) is supposed to have had some Berber ancestry at some point in the 14th century, I’m surprised they consider the Queen white at all.
@Podkayne
Well, I suppose there’s always taking oneself out of the line of succession for whatever reason. Or we could just say that Prince George one day meets someone who’s the child of Aunt Meghan’s friend, and one thing leads to another until we get to Liz 10.
@Alan Robertshaw:
Diana’s dress! I remember feeling disappointed by it. Those puffy sleeves with the bows. I was only 13 or 14 at the time.
I think maybe, just maybe, Meghan Markle’s dress didn’t ‘translate’ too well over the airwaves. All the embroidery on the veil, for example, probably looked stunning in person.
When my sister was married, I noticed that her thong underwear could be seen through her ivory sheath dress. I said nothing about it. It was too late to do anything about it, anyway.
@ Robert
I seem to remember when Diana married Charles there was a lot of stuff in the press about how she was the most English royal spouse since Methuselah was a boy…
Not to mention her uncle popping up to vouch for her virginity, I kid you not.
@Handsome: Punkle Stan: Jack:
OK, point taken.
I honest-to-god meant no offense.
@Dormousing_it
You might have meant no offense but it was still gross. Like you might not have meant to run over someone’s toes but you did. Just try not to do it again.
I suppose that the racists should be glad that though my pure white race line ended when both of my sons sired my racially mixed grandkids, my brother and sisters have nice white grand babies.
Oh. Except my Dad was 1/6 Comanche. And my mother’s family has lived in the south since the time Georgia was a prison colony, so if I ever get my DNA checked I can be pretty sure that there is some post-1700 African blood in me too. So my very white freckled skin and fine textured curly hair is more than a little deceptive.
So… people who spend all their time being WHITE all over the place need to find something else to be proud of. Maybe try actually doing something worthwhile.
@Dormousing_it
Trying not to reignite anything, and this is not the main problem I think with what you said, but there is no such thing as “negro blood” or black or white blood for that matter. Race is not a genetic category – in terms of genes it simply doesn’t exist. The genetic diversity amongst populations of recent African origin is greater than the rest of the world, and most of the rest of the world has such a history of population intermixing that there is no significant corellation with our socially applied racial categories and any predominance of certain genes. Race is purely a social construct – which of course does not imply it is not real, or very significant in people’s lives- just like the social construct that is money. Of course like most Americans Megan’s mother probably has some fairer-skinned ancestors; her father certainly has darker-skinned ones. But she has lived her life identified and identifying as a black woman, and that is the way race actually is constructed in a person’s life.
@Mogwitch:
Thank you for your articulation. Your last two sentences are what I was trying to say, and failing at.
I’m desperately procrastinating at this time. I should have never picked up my iPad when I did.
Eh…I’ll agree to disagree on that one. There’s four to six out of the 39 there that I could agree with you that aren’t “modest” by conventional standards, but considering that “modest” is a very subjective thing, and most of the other ones have long sleeves and full length skirts and only show a little bit of in-between cleavage here and there, I can’t really agree.
Though, thinking more about it, I think the whole “modesty” thing bothers me because it’s associated with Markle specifically. Because she has gone out and had wine with friends and such, and now that she’s no longer a “party girl” (by the most minimal of definitions), she has to be the “modest duchess”.
It feels gross to me. There’s a not-so-subtle waft of patriarchal “women must remain pure and modest!!!” bullshit.
And doubly so when it’s referring specifically to Markle, who is black.