By David Futrelle
So our old buddy @TakedownMRAs posted an amazing Tweet last night documenting what is either a new low or a new high — I can’t decide — in the fight of brave men against the evil gynocracy.
In this case the evil gynocracy was represented by a women who responded to a request for a nude pic by sending the pic-requester a pic of an angry chef’s forehead instead. What followed may surprise you. Or maybe not; nothing is shocking any more.
I wish I could give you a link to the original discussion but, alas, both of these accounts have vanished — though several accounts have, er, borrowed Em’s original post and are reposting it as their own funny story.
Did I mention that you all should be following @TakedownMRAs? Because you should.
I wasn’t a fan, or rather I had no opinion on Van Dyke until he recently not only turned out to still be alive, but officially apologized for his accent in Mary Poppins. Apparently no one told him he was doing it wrong, so he figured he must have got Cockney perfectly right.
To those pointing out (reasonably) that it’s obvious that the picture that David’s used to illustrate his post is of a forehead, I saw the original picture and it consisted of a single crease in that forehead massively zoomed in before being turned 90˚.
I have to say that even despite these adjustments I found its erotic allure somewhat elusive, not least because it was heavily pixellated thanks to the extreme magnification and pretty much out of focus – but I daresay it takes all sorts.
The whole asking for nudes & handing out dic pics phenomena baffles me; at least how it become normal male behavior. However it is clear that most of the people doing it are not just trying to harass women. I think most of the guys do it precisely because it is seen as the normal thing for a guy to do. They have no idea what really works so they just copy other men, specifically the most visible and loudest men. There are also a lot of dudes who only chase women in order to fit in with other men in the first place.
IDK, if this is seen as normal male behaviour or not must really depend on the kind of company you keep. I have male friends who are on Tinder and go on dates, and none of them behave like that.
That dude can’t have seen a pair of breasts before in his life, lol.
@QuantumInc
I don’t think that’s clear at all. Have you been on dating sites as a woman? Back when I had profiles on multiple dating sites it was very clear to me as a woman that there was a very big difference between the guys who went straight to asking for nudes, describing sex acts, demanding sex acts, sending dick pics, etc. and everyone else: The former group were all bent on violating boundaries and controlling women. It was obvious from their behaviors, from their descriptions in their profiles, and from their responses to questions on the questionnaires.
My favorite game to play with dudes who ask for nudes is to send them things that are also called by the thing they want to see, feigning ignorance the whole time.
For instance:
– “Nudes” is a nude shade makeup pallete
– “breasts” is chicken breasts.
– “Tits”/”Boobies” are the birds
– “Pussy” is the cat
And so on and so on until he gets bored or pissy.
And if someone wants to “wha wha” at me because this dude’s precious fee-fees got hurt because he didn’t get the picture he was after, then I’d ask them why my feelings, as a person who got an unsolicited message begging for nudes, don’t seem to fucking matter to them in the slightest.
“Not trying to” and “actually are” are two different things. I could “not try” to step on your foot, then “actually” step on your foot. Either way, I stepped on your foot, and hurt you. I could ramble about how it wasn’t my “intention” to hurt you, but I still did, and as an emotionally mature person, I would like to think that other people could recognize that.
Intention isn’t magic.
Except it’s not, as your yourself admit.
It’s not normal, and plenty of dudes can not think with their giblets long enough to engage in conversation with someone they fancy without bringing their equipment into it.
(And I daresay that being online has a lot to do with it. If they said this shit to a woman in meatspace, they very well could get slapped or mocked.)
And when women tell them off, or they get some other negative consequence of doing this behavior, they still fucking do it and ignore the negative feedback. They don’t care about the negative feedback, they just want to do what they want to do.
And as my mother would say: “If everyone else jumped off of a bridge, would you do it too?”
Except they can choose their own experiences online and off. The “most visible and loudest men” only exist if they choose to see them. There are plenty of “visible and loud” people who decry this bullshit. The men in question are just choosing to ignore them or remain ignorant of them.
Sure, but again: “If other men jumped off a bridge, would you do it?”
I once saw where a woman responded to an unsolicited dick pic by sending the guy a whole bunch of dick pics that she found on the internet. When he got upset about it, she said “I’m just trying to be friendly. Don’t you want to be friends?”
Oh, please let someone respond to a nudes request with this next.
https://twitter.com/trumpneckvagina/status/986440603327254528?s=20
Honestly the only problem I can see with this is that the guy might keep hassling her for “nudes”.
“You gotta let him down easy! Men’s emotions are very fragile things! They could fly off the handle at any moment and you’d be to blame!”
I’ve noticed that people seem to have a problem wrapping their head around subtext. If John were confronted with the aforementioned subtext of what he just said, he’d probably get into the “intent” thing as Paradoxical Intention just illustrated.
Subtext matters. Often more than the plain text. Look no further than Jordan Peterson’s bullshit about makeup in the workplace. The subtext speaks louder than the text, but it didn’t get addressed by the Vice interviewer.