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empathy deficit incel men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny self-hatred

Incel dating tip: Make women hate themselves by asking them out

That monster … likes me! Could I be a monster too?

By David Futrelle

Guys who define themselves as “involuntarily celibate” spend rather a lot of their time trying to figure out how to make women as miserable as they are.

And so you find incels regularly advising their celibate colleagues to pointedly ignore all the attractive women in their vicinity. “If u even ACKNOWLEDGE femoids in public ur a bluepilled cuck,” one commenter on Incels.me recently declared. “Dont give them even the slightest validation, ignore them like nature intended us to.”

Most of his fellow incels agreed. “Yup,” wrote one. “Hurts their ego if nobody looks at them.”

“Giving females attention only benefits them, and not you, so I don’t see why you should,” another agreed.

But one commenter had what he thought was a better idea: Don’t ignore these women. Ask them out! They won’t say yes, obviously. but they might start to worry that they’re as ugly as you are! 

Getlooksordie Recruit - Feb 12, 2018#18 Wrong  As an unattractive guy the greatest insult you can give to a woman is by approaching her. A good pickup line is "I like you. Since we´re in the same league I think it could really work out between us."  After she tells you to fuck off she´ll immediately run to the bathroom to fix herself thinking "why is that ugly guy approaching me? Am I ugly, too???"  Had this exact same thing happen to me IRL so I know.

CHECKMATE, FEMOIDS!

Incel is weaponized self-hatred.

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Handsome :Punkle Stan: Jack

Aren’t incels suppose to be INVOLUNTARILY celibate, not trying to be DELIBERATELY celibate? Incel not Decel?

Dvärghundspossen
Dvärghundspossen
2 years ago

Oh my… I actually feel sorry for this guy… “What’s the worst that could happen to women? If someone as hideous as me asks them out!”

Fluffy Spider
Fluffy Spider
2 years ago

This level of nonsense and bullcrap exceeds my expectations for “incel” whining. I’m mortified

Nina
Nina
2 years ago

Had this exact same thing happen to me IRL so I know.

So… a woman hit on him, but this dipshit thought she wasn’t good enough for him. I thought these guys were involuntarily celibate. Oh well, clearly that woman dodged a bullet there, so good for her.

Weird (thumper of trumpanzees) Eddie
Weird (thumper of trumpanzees) Eddie
2 years ago

to paraphrase Groucho Marx, “I would never go out with someone who would go out with me…”

PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
2 years ago

My eyes just rolled so hard, they flew out of my head and disappeared.

Brb. Gotta ask my daughter to help me look for them before I step on them.

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

Just preemptively addressing Feminist guy. As we all know he’s going to say some bullshit he’s said a million times before.

No one cares

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Benterati
Benterati
2 years ago

Unhappy misogynists are very unlikely to get laid, and then blame women for this. “Girls just wanna have fun” Be approachable and keep smiling.

NicolaLuna
NicolaLuna
2 years ago

Incel: “I like you. Since we’re in the same league, I think it could really work out between us”

Woman: “league? Oh, I don’t date men who assign arbitrary leagues to people.”

Incel: “No! I was calling you ugly! Be offended!”

Woman: *leaves*

Incel: “hypergamous bitch! Nice guys! Morning and evening height! Cock carousel!” *screeches*

Victorious Parasol
Victorious Parasol
2 years ago

Self-hatred makes you ugly, guys. Of course, so do the other kinds of hatred.

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

That’s probably the more likely scenario. Since incels just look like average guys and aren’t actually Frankenstein’s monster hideous, the woman would probably just be puzzled by the weirdly formal “since we’re in the same league, I think it could really work out between us” statement.

I’ve never heard of a woman having a self esteem crisis because a guy with an inadequate wrist circumference and feminine midface asked her out.

MaliceWUnderland
MaliceWUnderland
2 years ago

I used to be in a band. A man approached me after a show and said I looked unhappy on stage (that was true; I looked unhappy because we were having major sound problems and it was driving me nuts). He went on to say that since I had low self-esteem like him we would probably get along, and we should keep in touch.

No seriously. This happened.

Oddly enough, I did not run to the bathroom to cry and reevaluate my life. I also did not keep in touch.

Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
2 years ago

I believe most women develop pretty thick skins early on, partly in response to this sort of thing. I know I did.

This incel thread reminds me of something you’d read in the old MAD magazine. I can picture the cartoon character illustrations now.

Shadowplay
2 years ago

Jack Rickard illustrating?

Gijoel
Gijoel
2 years ago

I think Incels are involuntarily celibate is because they see sex as a status symbol, and not a pleasurable activity you can do with someone else.

Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
2 years ago

@Shadowplay:

Heh. I had to look him up. I was a sort of intermittent MAD magazine reader when I was a preteen and teenager. One of the most inventive covers to me, I remember, wasn’t an illustration at all. It was a giant barcode that covered nearly the entire magazine’s cover. This was in 1978 or ’79. The headline was something like “We hope this causes computers everywhere to come to a grinding halt”. This was when barcodes were fairly new, I guess.

Confused lady
Confused lady
2 years ago

This does not seem like the right track to take if you wish to cease being celibate.

Bina
2 years ago

ignore them like nature intended us to

Nature: ur doin it rong.

As with all things “incel”, the celibacy is very voluntary indeed. Just never acknowledged as such. And bitterly kvetched about until everything is blue.

kupo
kupo
2 years ago

@WWTH
Of course, the problem is that they’re more like Victor Frankenstein than his creature. If they were like the creature they’d be kind and compassionate and people might consider dating then.

Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
2 years ago

@WWTH

I’ve never heard of a woman having a self esteem crisis because a guy with an inadequate wrist circumference and feminine midface asked her out.

That sums up my appearance rather well, still can confirm no one’s ever reacted like that. And I mean, that’d only be scratching the surface as my body is also legit fucked up because of a number of malformations and later defects, basically I guess I’d look like the god of incels.

For some reason I still can’t crush the soul of a woman with a single glance, it’s like the superpowers are malfunctioning or something. Is it because of some rule like I should never have dated anyone ever ? Like those vegan powers in that movie ?

Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
2 years ago

I’ve checked out SlutHate, and of the pictures I’ve seen posted, most of these ‘incel’ types look fairly average to me. Not unattractive. I think many of them will look at their younger photos many years later, and realize they looked OK, maybe even good-looking.

It’s not their looks that are the problem.

Off-topic, but it’s only April, and there are already BUGS flying around. Mosquitoes, flies, even wasps. They do give my cats something to chase.

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
2 years ago

ITYM “Off-topic, but it’s already April, yet there is still SNOW lying around. Ice pellets, flurries, even freezing rain.”

Something is wrong with the climate in the northeast. Spring is getting later and later, which is the opposite of what should be happening as a result of climate change. What the hell is going on?

Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
2 years ago

@Surplus to Requirements:

Your guess is as good as mine. I think it was just last week that we had snow where I live, in the northeast, then this week some temps in the 80s.

I don’t live in New England, but it makes me think of the Mark Twain quote: If you don’t like the weather in New England now, just wait a few minutes.

Bugs. I actually sprayed myself with bug repellant in preparation for bed, cos’ the bugs get in my house.

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

We had a fucking foot of snow over the past 24 hours.

I WIN.

PeeVee the Tired
PeeVee the Tired
2 years ago

WWTH, yeah I saw that! Bloody awful.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
2 years ago

Did he… Did he run into the restroom too? Cos how else would he know what she did in there? Maybe she just had to pee like a regular person. Or maybe being hit on by creepy dudes in creepy ways tends to make women wanna leave the situation for a lil bit. Either is far more likely than ‘she ran from my truth bombs and inferior wrists’

Or he’s making it up. That’s possible too

Bryce
Bryce
2 years ago

I have unusually petite wrists. Naturally I put any women I see into an existential crisis by looking in her direction. Unlimited power!

Podkayne Lives
Podkayne Lives
2 years ago

Has this dude given any thought to what he’s going to do if the woman says yes?

F is for Fro
F is for Fro
2 years ago

@Podkayne

You’ll find that Incels are hopelessly one-track minded. Their plans only prepare for ONE outcome.

tim gueguen
2 years ago

I’m surprised he’d think this would work given that many incels seem to think that every woman is a version of the Mean Girl so commonly found in stuff with teenagers. Mean Girl’s response to a “loser” asking her out is to laugh, call him a loser, and walk away.

sunnysombrera
sunnysombrera
2 years ago

@Podkayne

If she said yes? He’d probably stand and stare with a deer caught in headlights look while trying to hamster a rationalisation for why she must be lying.

They’ve attached themselves to their self-made identities so strongly that as the post suggests, they’re actively seeking to strengthen it further by attempting to “hurt women’s egos.”

Bananananana dakry: Short-Haired, Fat, and Deranged
Bananananana dakry: Short-Haired, Fat, and Deranged
2 years ago

@Dormousing_it

I could say the same of a lot of weather in the Midwest too, especially in the spring. It gets bloody confused, is what. As in “shorts one day, polar expedition outfit the next” confused.

Never quite got used to Southern California weather being so predictable. They need to have a good whomper of a supercell thunderstorm down here. Provided that half the homes don’t slide off/ get buried by mud.

feministguy
feministguy
2 years ago

What a state they are

1- It isnt ever going to work- why they bother with dating is beyond me

2- Trying to use a womans insecurity to get a date is immoral. Its not okay. Its manipulative.

Valentin - Emigrantski Ragamuffin
Valentin - Emigrantski Ragamuffin
2 years ago

I wondered how long we must wait until unfeministguy comments. at least this article is about incels🤷

EJ (The Other One)
2 years ago

What’s weird is that although he never shows signs of listening to anyone, feministguy is slowly starting to say more reasonable things. For example:

Trying to use a womans insecurity to get a date is immoral. Its not okay. Its manipulative.

This is 101-level stuff, but it isn’t wrong. It could, in fact, have been said by a legitimately feminist guy.

Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
2 years ago

@EJ

I think it’s just cos it’s what PUAs do and incels hate them.

Stopped clock, I suppose.

feministguy
feministguy
2 years ago

EJ

I always believed manipulation is wrong, and everyone should have principles and values (be honest, dont lie, dont cheat, dont use someones insecurities to your advantage) WHATEVER the situation

Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden

I dont like men who are manipulators. I dont like men who lie to and use people. Nothing to do with PUA/INCEL

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
2 years ago

@ femistguy

I dont like men who are manipulators. I dont like men who lie to and use people

Ah, so that’s where the self loathing comes from.

Genjones
Genjones
2 years ago

“since we’re in the same league, I think it could really work out between us”

Well, much like my dog, I’m keenly aware of my own cuteness, so good luck with that. Based on that sentence alone, I can extrapolate that the myriad other factors that determine whether relationships work out are not compatible. Of course, incels seem to have trouble grasping that being insufferable, off putting and leaving a bad impression on the first encounter is not the best strategy for endearing yourself to anyone.

Steph Tohill
Steph Tohill
2 years ago

@Feminist Guy

They can date but they need to change their shitty personalities and lose the entitlement.

Non conventionally attractive men find girlfriends and get married every single day.

Will they find it harder than their more attractive counterparts? Probably. But the same is true (especially true) for women. But their personality is a killer.

cornychips
cornychips
2 years ago

Re: feministroll

Im up for banning. He has failed the troll challenge and willfully ignores our suggestions. He’s definitely a sock, and DOES seem like a blackpiller (Alan, I felt something weird that i couldn’t describe about feministguy, and you hit the nail on the head). And the “what makes people gay” shit he asked a few threads back is awful.

He adds nothing to the conversation. Not even humor. He’s not fun to toy with. He is fucking boring.

He is LOVING the attention. He is a parasite.

Banhammer please!!

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

I noticed that this time he left boundary violations off the list of not okay things for men to do to women

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IgnoreSandra - Marxist in a Skirt

Joke’s on them, I think I’m less attractive than they could ever state or imply.

I also don’t give a rat’s ass. Beauty is nice, but my life is just fine without beauty, and whether others think I’m attractive or not I don’t struggle with having strong interpersonal connections.

feministguy
feministguy
2 years ago

@steph

Maybe. But they are better off making peace with being single. And if they do, for some magical unexpected scenario date, then thats good.

@Alan I dont lie to people or manipulate them..

kupo
kupo
2 years ago

@Alan I dont lie to people or manipulate them..

Yeah, all the shit you’ve been doing in here is gross, manipulative gaslighting bullshit. So don’t you EVEN start.

Edit: Sandra, what are you talking about? You’re adorable!

Jesalin
Jesalin
2 years ago

I second the call for the banhammer.

@Sandra

What kupo said!

Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
2 years ago

@fguy

That’s true, but not for lack of trying though. I mean, I’m not even sure you realize how see-through you are, even though we’ve all been taking great pains to tell you.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
2 years ago

@ feministguy

I dont lie

But that in itself is a lie. It like one of those logical paradoxes Kirk would use to blow up a malevolent computer before he copped off with a green lass.

Shadowplay
2 years ago

@Alan

Whadaya mean, BEFORE?!

Give Kirk his proper respect.

Catalpa
Catalpa
2 years ago

If an imcel came up to me and said something like “hey, you seem just as hateful, bitter, self-pitying, toxic and misogynistic as me! I think we’d be great together, wanna get a coffee?”, then I might have a minor crisis about what the hell I did to give off that impression. But just being hit on by someone who is ostensibly unattractive isn’t going to make me feel worse about myself. (Depending on how creepy or boundary-violating the dude is, it may well make me uncomfortable, though.)

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