By David Futrelle
Ok, so let’s say you’re a totally normal dude who just happens to be, you know, an incel. And like most normal dudes you keep a folder full of pics of super handsome shirtless dudes on your computer, not because you like to look at them or anything but because you need them as evidence you can pull out at a moment’s notice the next time you get into an argument with someone online who doesn’t believe the totally true fact that super handsome dudes who are capable of removing their shirts are literally the only dudes in the world who can get dates with women unless, I dunno, the woman is super icky or a sex robot or just wants money from you or something.
And then your dad finds your folder of super handsome shirtless dudes and all hell breaks loose.
Dude. Dude. Dude!
I’m sorry about your dad, who honestly sounds like a bit of a jerk, but there’s nothing inherently weird about having a folder full of pics of shirtless hunky dudes on your computer.
It wouldn’t be weird if you had a folder full of pics of shirtless hunky dudes because you think they’re hot, regardless of whether you think of yourself as gay or bi or straight or asexual or whatever. It wouldn’t be weird if you had a folder full of pics of shirtless hunky dudes NOT because you think they’re hot but because, I dunno, you were trying to learn how to draw superheroes and wanted some pics of buff male torsos to use as a reference. Or because you like making funny photoshops with them. Or because you’re trying to get buff yourself and want inspiration. Or just because for some unknown reason you find looking at them very relaxing.
I mean, there are hundreds of non-weird reasons you might have a shirtless hunk folder on your hard drive.
The only weird reason I can think of for having a shirtless hunk folder on your hard drive is because you need them as evidence you can pull out at a moment’s notice the next time you get into an argument with someone online who doesn’t believe the totally true not true fact that super handsome dudes who are capable of removing their shirts are literally the only dudes in the world who can get dates with women.
It would also be weird if you had a folder full of pics of Chad Kroeger, but that’s a whole other can of worms my friend.
Kupo,
I would not be surprised if those were trolls and not actual eating disordered people trying to recruit. If nothing else, because so many eating disordered people are weirdly competitive about who can restrict the best and don’t necessarily want the extra competition. But I should note that my time in the pro-ana community was way back in the first half of the aughts so things may very well have changed a lot.
@WWTH
That’s about when I was in HAES. I got the impression they just hated us and wanted to ruin our days. So trolls, in other words.
Zenobia
Oh my gosh that’s terrible. I read from girls and women who had the same problems like dieting at a very young age but I don’t think I ever heard a guy having the same deal. I wish you well and therapy is always good and to work on yourself and try to be the best you can be.
You wouldn’t. It’s not talked about much. There is a fair amount of pressure regarding appearance on boys and young men too.
Not going to say it’s more than for girls because no effing way it is, but it exists and some boys do respond poorly to it.
@Alan:
I don’t know that incels have ever defined the precise angle at which a canthal tilt becomes bad (actually, they probably have, but I’m afraid to look). Undoubtedly there are examples and counterexamples for every conceivable value. I should probably organize my folders by hundredths of decimal places just in case.
Anyway, your comments are pleasingly tilted and I enjoy them tremendously.
@Surplusthatwasme:
That’s true, the ball doesn’t matter much in scorekeeping. Although the flap over Deflategate and “cheating” reminds me of the outrage over makeup, padding, airbrushing, etc. And the outrage whenever someone reminds incels that sex workers exist. And the outrage over suggestions that attractiveness isn’t narrowly defined or fixed. How can you objectively keep score if there are no standards? How can it count as a notch if the woman is paid or has artificially inflated her HB-ness with tricksssy cosmetics? These guys don’t want any asterisks next to their “wins”.
@EJ:
Now I really want there to be a Chad Go, where incels fall into public fountains while pursuing a rare Dark Triad.
Aw, thank you Fruitloopsie. I’m doing much better now. I won’t say things are perfect (I’m in a profession that greatly rewards skinny women) But I no longer starve myself on a regular basis or cry if I gain a few pounds. Oddly enough, taking trapeze lessons has really helped me appreciate my body for what it can do, and not just what it looks like.
Re guys and the pressure to be thin: I’ve heard from personal trainers that there seems to be an increase in guys who have a problematic relationship to food. They go to a PT in order to gain muscle, follow the exercise program, never gain any muscle and wonder why, and eventually it turns out it’s because they’re not eating enough. Because they have this idea that in order to be attractive they must look like movie superheroes, which means muscle but very little body fat. And so even though they want to gain muscle, they’re so afraid of eating too much in case they gain fat too.
@Dvärg
See it in the army a lot too, especially among the 20 year olds (and, increasingly, the ones who’ve hit their 30s). Some very problematic relationships with food.
Least in the army I could order the buggers to eat. 😛
@Zenobia Augusta <3, it sounds like things are a little better. I'm glad to hear that, and I hope they keep improving.
As bad as Nickelback is, it would be far better if they talked about that particular Chad instead.
@ makroth
I spent years defending Nickleback on the ground “Well they do have that one good song”. Then someone pointed out I’d been thinking of a different band.
ETA: Funny thing is, when I’d mentioned the song (‘Inside” by Stiltskin) loads of other people thought that was by Nickelback as well. Must be some weird psychological phenomenon at work.
Bodybuilders, at least during compeition, try to get their body fat levels down to something seen only in famine victims. I do wonder how badly that screws them up even if they’re not trying to enhance themselves with HGH, steroids, etc.
I’d love to see more fellows shoot for the Eugen Sandow look, which is more “classic Greek sculpture”:
Dapper ‘stache optional.
@Katamount:
I’ve never had a PSU fail that didn’t either just abruptly die, or the fan did so it began to overheat.
I’d be willing to bet actual dollars that it’s buggy Windoze 10 or else a buggy Win10 driver, especially if as you say the problem started right after installing a major service-pack level update to the OS.
But if your PSU is making odd sounds, chances are the fan is going. Either the fan or the whole unit (PSUs are pretty cheap, and are interchangeable enough a lot of the times you might be able to cannibalize a dead PC for its) ought to be replaced anyway.
@Buttercup: I believe the correct phrase is “tricksssy cosmeticses”. Accompanied by calling one’s
belovedgirlfriendtrophy “my preciousssss” and asking questions like (after getting a phone number, and seeing a trace of foundation transferred onto the paper from a finger) “what has my nasty new contactses got in her nasty little compactses?”And these MRA/incel types wonder why they have such a hard time getting a second date.
I use this sometimes for trainees with odd ideas about fitness. (fingers crossed the picture shows up).
No idea of original artist, sorry.
My friend who used to compete in bodybuilding was really strong in between contests, and I think a lot of bodybuilders are, but yeah, the prep for contests isn’t exactly healthy. And yeah, he’s done steroids too. He quit both drugs and bodybuilding competitions when he was prepping for this big international event and suddenly got this weird arytmic heart beat and began just feeling really weird. He thought that ok, this is a warning, better quit all drugs and crazy dieting now.
That was a couple of decades back and he’s fine now, healthwise, so probably a smart decision. He still works out a lot and he’s still strong, but doesn’t have an extreme body any longer.
Yeah. It’s interesting looking at Hafthor Bjornsson (Gregor Clegane on Game of Thrones), who is a bit more sculpted but as a Strongman champ is generally more just bulky and wide-waisted.
Also he has a cute little bitty puppy.
@Alan Robertshaw
And your canthial tilt.
Actually, a little while ago bodybuilding grandfather Arnold Schwarzenegger publicly complained that the bodybuilding champs nowadays aren’t as good-looking as they were back in his day, in part because they have bigger waists nowadays. Like, they still have next to zero bodyfat when they enter the stage, but there’s been this trend towards bulkier and bulkier abs, and therefore less narrow waists.
And yeah I weirdly know stuff like this just because a friend of mine used to do bodybuilding and still follow it.
@Surplus
If that’s the case… what options have I got? I mean, I’ve updated all my drivers, Windows 10 forces updates anyway and I’ve checked issues related to the power setup. I could try reinstalling Windows 10 entirely, but then the forced updates would put me right back in a bind. Can Windows 7 be downloaded from Microsoft and installed in its place?
what Lake Chad is:
http://www.africareview.com/image/view/-/4324572/highRes/1194918/-/1pgjmj/-/MAP.jpg
what incels think Lake Chad is:
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-YtPIEGellSo/Tw3TvjndaZI/AAAAAAAAAIE/OMAmqL0f-QI/s1600/Great+Lakes+of+Africa+copy.jpg
@Shadowplay
The artist in question is Kelly Turnbull, aka Coelasquid, who among other things draws the comic “Manly Guys Doing Manly Things” at http://thepunchlineismachismo.com/
!!!!!
She’s probably my favorite artist out there! I follow her, read MGDMT every week – hell I even interviewed her back in 2011! 🙂
Made my day, you have.
OK, fanboi mode off. 😛
@Shadowplay
Yeah, I’m in totally in platonic love with her. She’s just the coolest. I dunno why I remembered that particular picture, it has just stuck in my mind. (I think it was in the same conversation where she pointed out to people saying how unattractive bodybuilders were that bodybuilders didn’t do it so they could look nice to other people, they did it because THEY liked that look. It gave me a new perspective on that.)
@shadowplay, @schnookums
Specifically it’s an excerpt from her longer “Musculature / Character Design” tutorial. It’s linked on this page along with some of her other tutorials.
Ohhhh more reading!! 🙂
Bookmarked. I’m terrible at drawing figures.