By David Futrelle
It’s always a little strange to see self-described “involuntary celibates” — that is, guys who by their own admission are currently (and perhaps forever) unable to locate any women who want to fuck them — discussing sex as if they actually have first-hand knowledge about it.
But here are two dudes on the Braincels subreddit earnestly discussing what to them is a major sex controversy: should you bother to give women orgasms, assuming female orgasms even exist?
![AjitPaiFan1 Corinthians 7 1 point 17 days ago I don't care whether or not a BITCH gets her cumcums. That's the reality. The thing is, however, hoes talk about getting fucked amongst each other. If you fuck a bitch so hard she starts PISSING involuntarily and squirming like a sea creature (sometimes wrongly conflated with the transcendental male experience called "orgasm"), then every single one of her friends is going to hear about it and want in on the action. Considering the size of the social circle of the average female, making one of them cum opens up the opportunity for fucking dozens of other sheepish, millennial, STD ridden, bangin babes in a casual context. permalinkembedunsavereportgive goldreply [–]derpyderpderp42069[S] 1 point 17 days ago Or you could just fuck another girl whenever you want instead of being a beta cuck trying to please women. Jesus what's wrong with you cucks. "Maybe if I jump through these hoops and give some thot a super orgasm she will tell her friends and they will like me too teeheehee" Sheesh grow some self respect.](https://i0.wp.com/www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/ry7ctuf8vyig9uohjp.png?resize=580%2C615&ssl=1)
I really can’t imagine why women aren’t lining up to bed these fellows.
… but there’s only one of him! If you are too, Starfury, we only need two more to make up the requisite four … (come to think of it, I’m sure there are several somebody elses around here who’s from the right part of the world … but my memory is rubbish. Alan, it wasn’t you, was it? And someone you were talking to earlier …)
It is, but in my day we were so poor we could only afford three of us to do the Four Yorkshiremen sketch; and we were grateful. Folks today don’t know they’re born.
🙂 😀 🙂
(Three ?!?!? Luxury …)
Too late to start dating
Not had a boner in 2 years and proud !
And as for my exzcema, had to be hospitlised when I was a child it was that bad. No its just mild. Im so grateful I grew out the worst of it.
Ive already crushed any desire I have to date. I dont even look at women anymore as (Wow, Id like to date her). Ive taught my brain that intimacy isnt possible. Against nature, but I managed to fend off my natural desires
Dude… Guy… Feminist guy…
You’re protesting a bit too much, don’t you think?
Feministguy:
Here is a snake on a Segway. Your argument is invalid.
@opposablethumbs
I’m a filthy Midlander but I lived in Yorkshire for 4 years
@Alan
Three? THREE?!! For our third we lashed together 2 disparate scarecrow halves stuffed with noisy badgers, I lost 3 arms to a rogue badger that got free. Then Mam had to give dockers tongue-baths to pay for a new needle to stitch them back on, because we’d eaten all the needles from the biscuit-box. And I ruined this by using the word ‘disparate’ earlier didn’t I?
FFS, “Feminist”guy!
One minute you were claiming your supreme undatable ugliness was due to eczema; when it’s pointed out that people with severe skin conditions date and form relationships all the time, you back off and say your eczema is only mild. This whole thing is a shitty way to treat eczema people, especially the ones who haven’t mastered their own fears in that area. Damaged skin, scarring, burns are not a relationship killer, and its cruel to suggest they are.
Will you fall back on your droopy eyes now? Coz that would be bullshit too.
Why not just admit that the reason you are undatable is that you plainly have no interest in satisfying anyone’s needs in a relationship but your own? And you don’t actually want to have to deal with other people’s expectations?
@Feministguy, which is a huge misnomer.
1. Have you considered, or would you consider, dating a woman who suffered excema or had “droopy eyes”?
2. Some friendly advice, just in case you’re not, in fact, a sock-puppeting troll. Each thread is not a blank slate, so there’s no point just popping into new ones expecting a better reception, as I’ve noted you doing over the last several threads. Relatedly, and as others have pointed out, why don’t you try actually responding to others’ points instead of restating your own? If this is how you engage in conversation in meatspace, I’m not surprised you’ve had some issues forming relationships. Listen to what people are saying, and engage with it. Consider (gasp!) allowing it to shape your own opinions!
@All
This is my once annual delurking 🙂 Hi to David and the regular and sporadic commenters, and thanks for an educational and interesting comment section.
On droopy eyes: Alan mentioned Jono Lancaster, who was born with Treacher Collins syndrome. You can read a bit about him here:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-11780938
Pictured there you will see his droopy eyes… and his girlfriend.
Badgers? You had badgers?
We ‘ad t mek do wi a frightened ewe and t’coal dust we coughed up! Don’t know theys born, t’younguns.
😛
Badgers? Badgers? We don’ need no stinking badgers!
You know, I had assumed that Feminist Guy/Afroway was a troll from inceland here to attempt PR on their behalf and get attention. But the droopy eye thing does give me pause.
Anyone remember which troll of yore complained of a lazy eye and even once posted a picture of himself to prove his ugliness?
Hint: He has a morning and evening height and is likely also our seagull chomping friend.
Or maybe I’m just hoping every troll is a sock because I don’t want there to be so many obsessive sad boner whining attention hogs out there.
@WWTH
You think a MGTOW troll has become an incel troll? Hmmmm…
Analucia Cruz
I’m so sorry I wish I knew what to say except I know how you feel, I hope you seek therapy, find friends and hobbies; find a better and happier life. That’s what I’m trying to do.
“Nature” “Biology” do ‘Feminist’ guy and incels know the LGBT (asexual,etc) community exists? Heck even animals have their own personalities, their likes, dislikes, etc. And women get rejected too. But I don’t see women crying about it.
Maybe if they stop rolling in self pity, having sympathy for guys who are rejected and start working on themselves, seeing everyone (especially women) around them as people no one would have to be so miserable. Or just go away and leave everyone alone that works too.
I didn’t want to mention my thoughts on it, ’cause I was starting to get a certain 329-year-old-engineer vibe. And those sorts of conditions certainly do happen – I’ve known a few people with the droopy eye problem (All but one married with kids, too, as it turns out!). I seem to recall our vampiric friend saying that he liked winding us up for the fun of it, too. He get very purple-prosey about it.
But well, it’s just as likely that there is no match – those behaviours aren’t uncommon, after all.
I’ve come to the opinion that any post he doesn’t respond to is one he thinks is GARBAGE and is just us being mistaken, though. We’re just too fragile and misguided to face the hard, manly, science-fueled truth he’s layin’ down for us. So I don’t much care whether he’s a vampire with a class ring or what kind of pie he eats.
Note that he bragged about all of his non-relationship accomplishments! That stuck in my head something fierce last night.
Unattractive men have challenges in dating – our society is hard on people who don’t hurdle the arbitrary appearance bar in general, and this is no exception in men. But incel dudes, focus on the good things! Travel 19 countries, accomplish great things with work, gather acclaim and financial reward! You might be unattractive, but you can still earn good money and live a good life, incel guys! Do that instead!
Women can’t do that. Women are tied to their appearance in a way that men aren’t, and that you’re living proof of. Successful women have to be attractive, or they don’t succeed. Men benefit from being attractive too, but if they’re unattractive then the door isn’t barred – they just have to actually knock instead of being ushered in.
So yeah, that rubbed me the wrong way somethin’ fierce. Just wanted to put that out in text, to cast out the demons and all that.
Gave him the benefit of the doubt at first – it’s an aspect of my privilege that I do have that luxury.
He eroded the benefit quickly.
WWTH,
Are you talking about MRAL? Yeah, if this is him, talk about making a self-prophecy come true.
Still, he was better than Owly, and LOADS better than David K. Meller.
(I’m getting the distinct seagull vibe, too.(
Scild,
Too true. Men only have to worry about looks based value being assigned to them when it comes to dating and sex. Women have to worry about it in all aspects of our lives. Women’s accomplishments and talents will always come to second to their boner pleasibility.
Remember when a bunch of reviewers got upset over a female opera singer being too fat, even though by all accounts her performance was fantastic?
https://www.theguardian.com/music/2014/may/20/opera-figures-angry-at-description-of-soprano-stars-weight
Meanwhile, the Three Tenors look like this
which is just fine, but I don’t remember reviewers whining about how they were all old and paunchy or balding ew!
@WWTH
I wouldn’t discount the possibility of him being a sock, but at the same time I definitely think there are that many sad boner whiners on the internet.
What a coincidence – just this this time of the year the seagulls arrive in my neighborhood.
They’re attracted by the nearby farmlands, which provide earthworms. After dark, however, they’re drawn to the lights of the residential area and the university greenhouses. It’s like they’re too distracted to sleep at night. Naturally, they also poop everywhere.
Nothing’s quite as annoying, when you’re working at the greenhouses late at night, than a gang of sleep-deprived seagulls hanging out above you, patting their feet on the glass roof, arguing with each other in a lively fashion.
Id like to apologise to everyone for my comments. Too selfish , hijacking this forum which should be about womens problems and challenges and making it into how I cant get a date.
So what if I cant get a date? Big fucking deal
Women have to deal with manipulation, rape culture, wage gap ect ect. Lets focus on THOSE problems.
Once again, I hope everyone accepts my apology. No more about me and my inability to ever date. This forum isnt the right place for it
@Feministguy
I’ll accept an apology if you apologize for the numerous things that you did wrong that people have pointed out to you that you continue to ignore. Making the thread about you and going on about your dating life are pretty insignificant compared to those other things we’ve brought up. You need to be specific, you need to take responsibility, and you need to demonstrate that you know what you did wrong and why it was wrong.
headdesk
Yeah, repeating the thing that people actually took issue with in your apology post just really makes the apology seem insincere. I guess you didn’t take my advice to reread and absorb the Gandhi thread where we explained to you in detail where you went wrong?
No. This place is for mocking misogyny and the alt-right.