By David Futrelle
Here’s today’s tidbit of wisdom on the mysterious creatures known as “women” from one of Twitter’s many Men Going Their Own Way.
https://twitter.com/GenZMGTOW/status/970471640428462080
Damn those women and their devious honesty! HONESTY IS A TRAP! A DECOY! A WEAPON! A DECOY AND A WEAPON! At the SAME TIME!
Also, I think there’s something terribly wrong with that goth lady’s fingers.
Dear Splainy:
We are not your “peeps”, nor anything else pertaining to you. We are people who simply don’t give a shit about you. Why have you not Gone Your Own Damn Way Already?
“It’s realizing men built and maintained all upon the earth – not women.”
By “all”, ManSplainer, do you really mean “all” — as in the rocks and trees and stuff, and all the geological strata, and all the resources on and under the earth, and all the animals and birds and fish and fossils, the elements, the dirt and the plants?
In other words, would you care to rephrase that, laddie?
Ohhh. Finally, my tiny ladybrain can understand! Only women vote, men don’t. Because…. Reasons.
And women vote men into office instead of women and then they influence those men to fuck over other men. Because…. That’s way easier than voting women into office?
No. My tiny ladybrain still doesn’t understand.
He’s quite the experience, isn’t he?
@ bekabot
Well we could possibly take credit for the Mantle.
Alan, you have my deepest adoration.
So has falconer for the officially stolen for reuse “I’m so intimidated I’ll go have a nap”.
You people (all of you) are wonderful and a delight!
“I’m likely one of the greatest men that ever lived.”
ManSplainer, I give you Shakespeare and Milton and Wordsworth and Keats and Emerson and Thoreau and Hawthorne and Melville and Kepler and Huygens and Lavater and Tycho Brahe and Hawking and Lincoln and Luther and Ghandi and Baldwin, and for your special benefit I leave out Elizabeth I, Emily Dickinson and Penthesilia. Having done that much, I ask you once again if you don’t believe a bit of a restatement is called for.
(One of the few good things about the good old days, IMO, is that ordinary white boys way-back-when were give less reason to get such overinflated notions of their own capacities that they’d overstate them to such a ridiculous degree. They had women and POC’s to look down on and consequently felt less of an urge to aggrandize themselves. So last but not least, ManSplainer, I give you yet another canonical Great White Male — Socrates; and I counsel you to follow his advice. Know thyself, ManSplainer, know thyself. ‘Nuff said.)
“Well we could possibly take credit for the Mantle.”
It’s yours.
“I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, ‘… I drank what?’”
“That was no health drink” quoth Dumbledore.
Dang I missed the one known as man splainer I had a gift basket full of manly scented candles (now in Chad the alpha scent) and man sized butt wipes. Seriously though if nothing in the end matters according to his quote and we all die anyway why is he fighting for an ultimately useless meaningless cause. Wouldbt he rather give up a cause if he felt it didn’t matter. The MGTOW cause logic alludes me
He splained so hard
And flounced so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I hate the manosphere talking point that women vote, therefore the we must like patriarchy and any misogyny we experience is all our own fault. It’s just so lacking in perspective and shows a real ignorance of the political process.
Getting a major party nomination for an elected office entails a whole lot more than just having policy opinions that align with the voters. You need money, name recognition, connections, the ability to fundraise from wealthy donors. It’s really, really difficult for an average everyday person to get elected to higher offices. Voters have to make the best choice they can with what’s on the ballot. In the US, it quite often means voting for a Democrat that may not be super progressive as a strategy to keep the Republican out. We see the consequences of not voting tactically every day when we read the news. Often times our choice doesn’t represent our ideal. This isn’t exactly news.
Ah “women and children first.” The principle that isn’t found in maritime law and has been disproven by available statistics on shipwrecks:
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/world-history/women-and-children-first-its-every-man-for-himself-on-a-sinking-ship-7987975.html
The article brings up the Titanic, but notes that it is an exception – Captain Smith specifically ordered the crew to give priority to female and child evacuees. It also points out that male crew members have the best survival rate in general and that children have the lowest survival rate.
The “women and children first” thing is known as Birkenhead Drill and derives from the very singular circumstances in the sinking of HMS Birkenhead.
It was an inspiring tale, immortalised in a poem by Kipling; but it’s always been more of a mythical aspiration or ideal than a reality.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/HMS_Birkenhead_(1845)
I have a bit of an interest in the legal repercussions of the Titanic sinking, so I hope people don’t mind me having a waffle. Feel free to skip; it’s not that interesting.
As originally designed the Titanic had twice the number of (non collapsible) lifeboats. However the design was subsequently changed. Strange as it may seem, that was for quite valid safety reasons.
Contempary experience of ship collisions had shown that lifeboats just ended up being used to shuttle passengers to another vessel. So speed of turnaround was more important than capacity. On the original Titanic design, the lifeboats were on double-davits (ie in pairs next to each other). That both slowed deployment and recovery; and risked injury as people had to clamber over the inner boat to get to the outer. So the design was changed to single davit. (It’s the same rationale for removing escape hatches from lifts, more people were killed and injured trying to use them than were ever harmed just by staying in the lift).
It was known that, even in the event of catastrophic damage*, the Titanic could stay afloat for at least an hour. That was considered enough time to relay all the the passengers onto another ship. The shipping lanes at the time were so busy it was reckoned that there’d always be another vessel nearby. On the night of the sinking there were at least ten other ships closer to the Titanic than the Carpathia. Why none of them came to the rescue was an issue at both enquiries.
The lifeboats were intended to be boarded from a lower (boat) deck. They were actually structurally not strong enough to be lowered full from the main deck (which the officers were aware of and added to the confusion with the abandonment). But that was to increase turnaround time as they didn’t have to be winched up and down as far.
After the sinking both enquiries recommended going back to 100% lifeboat capacity.
[*White Star themselves never claimed the Titanic was ‘unsinkable’. That was the trade press. The nearest ‘official’ declaration was on a special railway ticket to see the ship, issued as a promotional event]
[To the tune of Tomodachi Life‘s Musical]
Take a step onto the sidewalk
That someone had to pour
Take a ride on the bus’s blue line
As the driver stays on time
Order up at the Starbucks
Guess who asks your name?
There’s ne’er a self-made man
Everyone does what they can
That’s kind of how society works
Is that such a crime?
@Zaunfink: Thank you! Always glad to hear I’ve said something memorable.
Man Splainer’s work is in danger of becoming a pastiche of itself*
Is this your dating profile?
I think the tumblrina who posted that (as linked) had the best reaction: “HOO DANG, WHAT A PANTYDROPPER.”
As I said when I reblogged it on tungle dot blue hell (link in my name), the only possible sign that it’s a poe is that he refers to the public school system as “real school” rather than “government schools” (one of the ways right-wingers propagate the notion that secular education is a godless-Communist plot). I can genuinely not tell whether Splainer is kidding; his reality, as D. Honig said lo these many moons ago, has lapped our satire.
* Somebody said this once about Neil Gaiman. He quoted it in an Amazing Heroes interview in which he pointed out that they might have meant his work was becoming a parody of itself.
@man splainer:
You make women sound *awesome*. Why can’t you be more like women?
@Austin Loomis If that is a real dating profile something tells me he won’t find prospects any better in “the former territories of the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth” than they are where he is now.
Am I the only one who read “bishes” as “bishies”?
Ow. I just sprained my eyeball muscles again.
@Axecaliber Yeah, I was thinking that as well. Not that I fit the category.
I implore all women thinking of maybe answering that profile: Ask for references first.
@tim: Hell, if that’s his real dating profile I suggest he learn how to make a fifi bag.