Merry Christmas, if you’re into that sort of thing!

@Skiriki

Those kitties certainly keep you on your toes! And the photo is totally gorgeous.

@Weird Eddie

“Why didn’t you just slap him and call a cab like we were taught back in the 70s, you damned Cat Person-reading millennial?!”

… or “just let him have his way, like we were taught in the ’50s”… or, ” ‘what’s wrong with what he’s doing?’, like we were taught in the ’30s”

. . . except that women weren’t taught that. It was never okay, although there might have been a lot of victim-blaming going on. But rape (unless it was sanctioned [marital] rape) was never perceived as okay. It was always understood to be a trauma.

My mother once told me about slapping a guy she was on a date with. This slap had happened 60 years earlier, but the incident was memorable enough, which is to say, horrible enough, that she remembered it all those decades later.

All that said, yes, there have always been people who doubt that any rape was an actual rape. In their minds, a woman just doesn’t want to admit that she wants sex, and so the next morning she calls it rape — when it was actually a good time for both of them. In this postmodern era, it’s a little harder to claim that a woman won’t admit to wanting sex, so nowadays these people claim that a woman was taking revenge on a guy the morning after because she doesn’t want to admit that she went to bed with an otherwise undesirable man. Slightly different lyrics, same tune.

Are Woody Allen’s days as an abuser with a Teflon coating numbered?

Dylan Farrow Will Discuss Abuse Allegations Against Woody Allen in First Ever TV Interview
Hannah Gold
Today 12:30am

On Tuesday, CBS announced that an interview with Dylan Farrow by CBS This Morning co-host Gayle King will air on Thursday. Per CBS, the interview will cover “[Farrow’s] allegations that she was sexually abused by her father, Woody Allen, and…Hollywood’s Time’s Up movement.”

I’m pretty sure that the comma after “Woody Allen” isn’t a series comma. In other words, I’m pretty sure that she’s not saying that the Time’s Up movement abused her. (Yeah, that was a joke. Gallows humor.)

https://jezebel.com/dylan-farrow-will-discuss-allegations-against-woody-all-1822144582

ETA: Over on Jezebel, commenter Ovy says this about Dylan Farrow: “I think this is it, this is the moment she’s been waiting for for over 20 years.”

@dust bunny

Yo, torilla tavataan jne 😉

@dust bunny
I think that you’re the exact right audience for my boyfriend’s claim about what a bunch of dust bunnies are called:

a floor of dust bunnies

(No, I won’t be here all week. I’m lucky I got to be onstage to tell this one joke. Oops, I see that security is headed my way.)

@dust bunny

?

Indeed, I knew Skiriki is Finnish… but often it seems you could just refer to Finnish anything on sites like this and some Finns will expose themselves

For what its worth, that has held true on every single site I’ve ever spent time in the comments section of. Doesn’t matter the site – comedy, relationships, prepping, military, engineering, woodworking, political – hell even cooking!
All you need do is say “en ymmarra” and you’ll get a dozen responses 😛

(forgive the lack of the correct A 😛 Can’t be arsed to open the character map thingy)

@ apina

often it seems you could just refer to Finnish anything on sites like this and some Finns will expose themselves

😀 come now, it takes a little bit more than that… the presence of a public sauna or lake at least NEARBY for an alibi, or alternatively some distilled grain spirits.

I try to pass on my inherited tradition of telling dad jokes to the humanity in general.

Valuable work! Not sure if I’m helping the cause by telling dad jokes, or hindering it by calling everyone’s dad jokes dad jokes. Some of my male friends seem a bit uncomfortable with that name now that we’re starting to slowly approach middle age.

@ Shadowplay

As it happens, “ei ymmarra” (or any incorrect variation thereof, as long as it leaves out the umlauts) is a thing many finns say to express deep confusion. You could see it as mocking language learners/foreigners, even as racist, or as referencing the mental load, embarrassment and helpless feeling of trying to navigate an unfamiliar society while communicating in a language that you do not speak well. I hope it’s more the latter, and perhaps that interpretation is a bit backed up by another very common, self-deprecating joke: deliberately exaggerating one’s finglish or mutilated swedish.
But you never know these days.

@dust bunny

As it happens, “ei ymmarra” (or any incorrect variation thereof, as long as it leaves out the umlauts) is a thing many finns say to express deep confusion.

I were told it means “I’m confused.” 🙂

It’s used a lot on some of the forums – the knife making ones especially, where you are trying to describe an action in words. Incidentally – there are a LOT of Finns as make knives, or smith in general. Seems to be the national hobby! 😛

The offended woman slapping lecherous man trope almost always occurs in a story or sketch in which the man is the protagonist. The woman is portrayed as uptight, snobby, mean, whatever. It’s not like creepers are any more happy with being smacked upside the head than they are with just being expected not to violate women in the first place.

There’s also of course the extreme privilege blindness with the expectation that women can just smack guys who step out of line and people will sympathize with her. That’s only true some of the time and when it is true it is true mostly only for cis middle and upper class white women.

Black Widow movie (maybe) coming, Scarlett Johanson

@ Shadowplay
from the article link….

Because to men who cling to the ideals of toxic masculinity, Phillips decision is a direct attack on their identity as a man. It represents nothing less than an existential threat to the men who have built their identity and self-worth on their relative dominance over women.

…

Men who have been inculcated into a culture of toxic masculinity need to regularly top up their King Dick Metre, which can only be fuelled by the disempowerment of someone else. And that someone else is very often a woman.

As Kat wrote (above)

it’s disappointment in humanity. Men like Robert and Aziz–who have probably tied their self-worth to their perceived masculinity–are so absorbed with reinforcing that self-worth that they will go to absurd lengths to coerce a woman into sleeping with him

This is so ingrained in our enculturation, it takes a conscious effort to resist… and I was raised in a family that discouraged this mindset, and actively taught me to resist it.

Strange people.
Weren’t they ever taught that you look after your own, defend the weak, refrain from hurting others unless necessary and otherwise ignore shit that doesn’t involve those three points? Some “manhood” these fools espouse.

Though the topic never came up with me and the partner – Italian women do not take their husband’s surname, full stop (they can hyphenate if they want to look pretentious AF). 😛