By David Futrelle
Leave it to the terrible excuses for human beings who populate the Incels subreddit to take victim blaming to its perverse extreme.
I’m not sure you really count as an “involuntary celibate” if you hold views so toxic that no women would even want to be in the same room as you.
@Z&T
I’m so sorry. Take care of yourself.
I’m so sorry, Z&T. Hugs.
I’m so sorry for your loss, Z&T.
@Z&T
*hugs* I’m so sorry. I hope you have what you need during this time.
Thank you all for your kind thoughts,
I’m tearing up. I’m still in shock and am at a loss for words.
@ Z&T
That’s so awful. My heart goes out to you.
@Z&T – I’m so sorry about your mother. I hope there continue to be supportive people around you.
As to the post content – this reads like a joke. The first time I heard this premise, it was an actual joke (not about domestic abuse, but something like: getting beat up makes you a criminal, because you’re consorting with criminals).
Ridiculous and wrong.
So, in other words, r/incels continues to hold the vaunted title of “worst subreddit.” The competition was difficult this year, with r/The_Donald putting up a hard fight, but r/incels managed to beat them out in terms of horribleness.
Z&T, my condolences for your terrible loss! It sounds like your friend and your cousin are helping a lot.
IgnoreSandra, so sorry; I hope the facebook assholes let up on you.
Thanks everyone for you thoughts, it means a lot to me
I am thinking of how I can talk about my Mom as a “Feminist”. She got out there and did it. Hard worker. Faced it all down and kept going. Business woman. Executive.
She went out there and DID IT. Because my “dad” split. (And he never paid child support let alone any kind of alimony.)
She did it.
Brilliant and very hard working.
We often clashed because I’m just as brash as her, but I loved her with the fire of a thousand suns.
And now I’m going to start crying again…..
Yeah, I’m not reading this post. I just spent an hour and a half talking to an old friend who was nursing a shiner. Her soon to be ex husband threw a tablet at her and got her eye.
@Z&T,
That’s heartbreaking. I’m so very sorry. It sounds like your mum was an incredible person.
@Sandra,
What a complete nightmare. Please tell me to shut up if need be – but have you considered taking a break from Facebook etc. in the interests of self-care? You’re fighting the good fight, but you need to look after yourself too <3
Z&T,
My condolences. I’m very happy that everyone around you has been emotionally supportive, it gives you hope that people really aren’t that awful.
@Z&T
I’m so sorry
@Mish
That just isn’t an option for me. Facebook is the only way I can connect with my existing friends and what little support I have. I for damn sure don’t trust my mom and dad with the shit I’m going through, and I don’t have a therapist.
Plus I know me when I don’t have support. I’ve come really close to suicide whenever I feel totally isolated, plus if I don’t have my friends I know I’m going to seek attention/validation from somewhere and I don’t particularly want to go back to trying to use sex to feel like I matter.
But thanks for thinking of me. I just have to keep fighting, allow my rage to propel me where my strength fails me.
@IgnoreSandra
http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8051/8144818532_17be802007.jpg
(Sumi and Tucker, Itty Bitty Kitty Committee alumni)
@Z&T
@Z&T I am very glad you have supportive people with you. It’s the best. <3
@Sandra :/ *luffs and internet hugs*
Z&T, I’m so sorry. Hope you have all the support, practical and loving, to help you.
Deepest sympathies, Z&T. Your mum sounded like she was an amazing woman.
@Sandra,
Ok, I totally get that. And I get that you can look after yourself, don’t get me wrong. I just hate it when good people go through this shite. If you ever need extra support in addition to your amazing friends, please let me know (you can find me on Twitter @MishMei for starters).
@PaganReader,
Just so you know, your itty bitty kitties are always appreciated – and not only by the people they’re posted for 😀
@Sandra
*hugs* (if wanted)
Z & T – My condolences. I lost my dad two years ago and it’s still hard.
One thing I wish I had known from the outset is that grief can cause odd things like an inability to focus. This happened to me and I thought I was going senile on top of everything else. I got better, eventually. You will, too.
Thank you again all. @ Hambeast, yes I’m feeling rather depressed and unfocused. But as Horrorfan said, there are some good and helpful people out there (and here) so it’s a bit of hope to hang on to.
Z&T, <3
You're allowed to feel depressed and unfocused. It's so painful. You'll feel better in the future, but you're allowed to feel bad now. All the healing to you <3
Z&T,
You have my deepest condolences and sympathy.
This seems like a great thread to drop a link to purrli in