By David Futrelle
Do you ever find yourself wondering what they’re talking about over on Gab, the “free speech” alternative to Twitter that quickly turned into a playground for some of the worst human beings on the Internet?
Well, wonder no more. I’ve collected together a selection of Gab posts from the site’s “popular” page today. As you look through these lovely posts, remember: I didn’t search for hours to find the very worst posts on the site from marginal commenters that no one there pays attention to. No, these are some of the most highly upvoted posts on the site, which Gab itself chooses to highlight on a special page that’s basically one of the main entryways to the world of Gab.
In other words, these are Gab’s Best and Brightest here, saying things that lots of Gabbers agree with, on topics ranging from the Holocaust (apparently “a lie”) to Lena Dunham’s “arse” (apparently sub-optimal). You can click on any of the images to see the comments in context over on Gab, if you dare.
Be prepared to throw up in your mouth a little.
IRONY ALERT.
So anyhoo, that’s Gab, putting its best (jackbooted) foot forward.
Sorry about the weird cropping of some of the images and the tininess of some of the text in the screenshots above; individual posts there sometimes take up more than one screen, because the site was apparently designed by incompetents.
@Diego:
Yeah, my sister had one of hers go walkabout in the woods for two or three weeks before she (the cat, a calico) came back, skinny and dirty and minus the tip of her tail, but otherwise fine. I’m hoping mine does the same thing, although she’s not a walkabout-in-the-woods kitty (at least she’s never been in all the four years I’ve had her), and the woods around here are rather further from my house than they are from my sister’s. Another sis thinks she may have been stolen by someone who thought she was too adorable to resist, and that may well be; kitty’s very sweet and friendly, as well as pretty, and unique with those extra toes on all fours. She could have walked up to someone just to make friends, and they may have figured she was homeless and just taken her.
And yuppers, males fight viciously, at least if they’re not neutered before they reach maturity. Lots of people leave theirs intact figuring that it’s okay because they can’t have kittens, but they forget that unneutered toms have other issues going on. One of them is wandering in search of females in heat to mate with, and the other is fighting other kitty-boys for the privilege. And oh yeah, there’s also spraying to mark their turf…and tomcat urine is the stinkiest cat urine. That’s almost as nasty as all the wandering and fighting. Most of the cats I’ve kept have been female. And all the ones that lived longer than a year or two did so because I got ’em fixed.
also, it continues to blow me away that there are people who find Twitter to be too restrictive and authoritarian…
Speaking of Lena Dunham, I just watched tonight’s American Horror Story and she had a guest role as Valerie Solanas. If they hated Dunham before, they’re really going to hate her now.
Sending good wishes for your kitty, Bina.
@tim gueguen
thanks for filling me in! those are some of the dumbest “conspiracy theories” isn’t ever heard of!
Cats do this fairly often too. My neighbors cat would just pounce in through the window and chill in my room, even though I never fed her.
When I visit my best friend there’s also this cat which is obsessed with getting into his house, for who knows what. It’s not like he has pets or anything, she just hangs about and bolts in the minute he opens the door, and we have to drag her out. No clue whatsoever what she wants, she just stays and chills for no readily apparent reason.
This would be so amusing if these people weren’t in power right now…
-squint- I… think the waifu one is a troll? I’m not sure, though, and that perturbs me.
Potato bag arses? D=< Hey, I resemble that remark!
Also, didn't they know 'waifu' only works for wanting anime girls and fantasy characters, not real people? D:
@tim gueguen:
From context I think he must have meant “jobs”, though how it got that badly misspelled is likely to forever remain a mystery.
He specifically said “walking”, so I’m picturing it scuttling along on the road like a crab, on the tips of some starched bits of folded cloth or something …
@Buttercup Q. Skullpants:
Nah, he just proved that his computer can color inside the lines with the floodfill/wand tool threshold set appropriately.
My first glance at the “Don’t make white kids angry” image gave me the impression that the fighter jets were UFOs, and for a single blissful instant I was merely confused about how angry white kids could cause interstellar invasions. Then the swastikas registered. Ugh.
Ugh, the dehumanisation of the hijab comment. A woman is not a headscarf, any more than a man is a MAGA cap.
@Tim Gueguen, Surplus to Requirements
Re: gibs
I think it’s meant to be the word “gives” (as in “gimme welfare”) in a mocking tone of voice (cf. “‘muh rights’” in the same… Gab? Tweet? Whatever.)
Hijabs walking down the street all by themselves? That’s some great and amazing news! What technology has made this possible? Or are they perhaps used by restless spirits? Air elementals? Don’t keep us in suspense, alt-reich. The world needs to know!
Here’s some baby animals:
In fairness, if I saw a hijab or any other garment floating around person-less, I’d be terrified too.
The waifu guy… can’t be real, can they? It sounds like an over-the-top parody of an anime-obsessed MRA. Then again, there’s the anti-Semitic dogwhistle username. Ugh.
@Bina
I hope you find her soon! (Or she comes sauntering in of her own accord)
@Christina
No, it’s for real. They think women would naturally gravitate to being “waifus” if not for Jews pushing for “Cultural Marxism” in the US. Poe’s law and all.
I assumed “gibs” is supposed to be gives as well, and possibly a case of the poster thinking undocumented migrants get free stuff from the government. Which they don’t because of the whole undocumented part.
Thought gibs was from the “charming” euphemism gibs-me-dat.
‘Hijabs floating around people-less’ is, IIRC, something of a motif in the film ‘Under the Shadow’, which is worth watching for a number of reasons.
First, self-driving cars. Then, self-walking hijabs.
AI is taking over; soon, impotent white men will be fully disposable!
?These hijabs were made for walkin’?
@Bina – Sometimes, if you put out her favorite food, she’ll smell it and come back. If she’s the skittish type or isn’t used to the outdoors, walk around the neighborhood and check under bushes, porches, and other hidey holes. I had an indoor cat who used to slip outside, get scared, and go to ground somewhere nearby. He’d sit there for hours watching me walk by and call him, the little stinker.
Putting out a trail of used litter tray contents leading back home supposedly also helps. I do hope he returns home soon. A friend’s cat goes on occasional walkabout and she’s in pieces until he comes back, which he always does with a “What?” attitude, so I can understand how you must be feeling. Sending wishes and ‘go back home’ vibes to you both.
@ I hope you find your cat soon. It must be so stressful.
I’m lucky my cat never did this. The worst he did was disappear on the roof for a day when we first brought him home.
I dunno. The Obama one reminds me of the Putin make-up one.
@Christina Nordlander,
(See if this embeds right)
Though in looking this story up, I learned that there’s a paper that claims Dr. Seuss has racist elements in his most popular character(s), and that a Cambridge elementary school librarian used that to justify rejecting a gift of books from Melania Trump.
Not sure what to think about that. 😐